Yu-Gi-Oh! Fan Fiction ❯ The Princess Bride Yu-Gi-Oh Style ❯ Seto is found and a Visit to the Local Miracle Marik ( Chapter 9 )

Seto is found and A visit to the Local Miracle Marik

Me: *Notice the horde of angry fans* I can explain… but right now I will run and skip the review replies. Bye bye!

---------------------------------------------------------------- -----

Solomon (Off-screen): Joey and Noah were reunited. And as Joey nursed his sugar-high friend back to health, he told Noah of Gozaburo's death (ding dong the jerk is dead ^_^) and the existence of Count Lector the Western Man. Considering Noah's life-long search; he handled the news quite well.

Noah: *Collapses into a bowl of soup*

Later Joey keeps dunking Noah's head into giant tubs of icy water and hot water.

Noah: Okay that's enough! Where is this is Lector so I may kill him?

Me: *Can be seen in front of one of the windows. * Sounds like something a psychopath would say.

Noah: *Glares* No one asked you!

Joey: Ahem. He's with da Prince in da castle. But da castle gate is guarded by 30 men.

Noah: How many can you handle.

Joey: I don't tink more den ten.

Noah: That leaves 20 for me. At my best I can't defeat that many. I need Gozaburo to plan. I have no gift for strategy.

Joey: But Gozaburo is dead.

Noah: *Has a wild look on his face* No. I don't need Gozaburo; I need the Man in Black.

*Then the song "Here comes the Men in Black" starts playing*

Noah: -_-; I said MAN in black.

*Song stops playing*

Noah: *Drags Joey out of the house* There will be blood and violet eyes tonight!

Meanwhile…

Stephen: Rise and report.

Rex: The Thieves Forest is emptied. Thirty men guard the gate.

Stephen: Double it. My princess must be safe.

Rex: The gate has but one key and I hold it.

Just at that moment, Kisara enters

Stephen: Aw my dulcet darling. Tonight we marry. Tomorrow morning the men will escort us to the Florin Channel where every ship in my armada waits to accompany us on our honeymoon.

Kisara: Every ship but your four fastest, you mean.

Stephen: Huh?

Kisara: The four you sent.

Stephen: Yes. Yes of course naturally not those ones.

Rex: *bows and leaves* Your Majesties

Kisara: *is glaring at Stephen. * You never sent the ships. Don't bother lying. It doesn't matter anyway. Seto will come for me.

Stephen: You're a silly girl.

Kisara: *Slaps Stephen* Yes I'm a silly girl. For not having seen sooner that you are a coward with a heart filled with fear!

(A/N Yes I know Buttercup didn't slap Humperdink but she should've.)

Stephen: I would not say such things if I were you.

Kisara: Why not? You can't hurt me. Seto and I are joined by the bonds of love. And you cannot track that. Not with a thousand bloodhounds. And you cannot break it not with a thousand swords. And when I say you're a coward, I mean you are the slimiest weakling ever to crawl the Earth.

Stephen: *Grabs Kisara's hair and drags her back to her room* IWOULDNOTSAYSUCHTHINGSIFIWEREYOU.

*Stephen throws her into her room and slams and locks the door. Then he runs off to… *

The Pit of Despair

Bonz is sleeping, Seto is spacing out, and Lector is reading an issue of EGM.

Lector: Ah don't believe it! "Rumble Roses" sucks! Dang it and Ah was gonna get it later today.

Stephen suddenly bursts in and glares at Seto.

Stephen: *To Seto* You truly love each other, and so you might have been truly happy. Not one couple in a century has that chance, no matter what the storybooks say. And so I think no man in a century will suffer greater then you!

*Stephen shoves the lever all the way up to 50*

Lector: Not to 50!

Seto: *Screams loudly, very, very loudly. *

As Seto screams, people start to hear.

Noah: Joey listen, do you hear?

Joey: Yeah but barely.

Noah: That's the sound of ultimate suffering…

Joey: Really I tought dat was da sound of my eardrums ringing.

Noah: *Isn't really listening to Joey* My heart made that sound when Count Lector kidnapped my brother. The Man in Black makes it now.

Joey: The Flan in Brak?

Noah: >_< Man in Black! Hey wait a minute. O_O I think someone else screaming.

Meanwhile…

Stephen and Lector are running away from a young woman (not me I swear) holding twin rapiers.

?: You two are going to die after tormenting Seto!

Stephen: This is the what? Second time this month!?

Lector: Third if y'all count Kisara's dream!

Back to Noah and Joey

Noah: Oh well. Now let's get through this crowd. Excuse me. Pardon. Very important cause here.

Joey: EVERYBODY MOVE!

The crowd parts like the Red Sea and soon Noah and Joey see Bonz carrying a wheelbarrow.

Noah: Where is the man in black?

Silence

Noah: Joey jog his memory.

Joey: *Conks Bonz on the head and Bonz drops to the ground with a thud. * I'm sorry Noah I didn't mean to jog him so hard. Noah?

Noah: *Is kneeling and pointing his sword straight ahead. * Brother, I have failed you for all these years. Now our misery can end. Somewhere, somewhere… close by is a man who can help us. I cannot find him alone. I need you. I need you to guide my sword. Please

He then stands up with his eyes still closed.

Noah: Guide my sword.

Soon Noah's sword pokes the tree and Noah is ashamed and punches the part of the bark, which is actually the door to the Pit of Despair.

The two enter and see Seto, dead.

Joey places his ear on Seto's chest in hopes of hearing a heartbeat.

Joey shakes his head and looks Noah.

Joey: He's dead.

Noah: It is just not fair.

Mokuba: *Off-Screen* Grandpa, grandpa wait. *Now on-screen* What did Joey mean "He's dead"? I mean he didn't mean dead.

Solomon says nothing.

Mokuba: Seto's only faking right?

Solomon: You want me to read you this or not?

Mokuba: Who gets Stephen!?

Solomon: Wha?

Mokuba: Who kills Prince Stephen? At the end, somebody's gotta do it. Is it Noah, those crazy ladies that keep appearing in the story? Who?

Solomon: Nobody, nobody kills him. He lives.

Mokuba: What!? You mean he wins?! Jeez grandpa why'd you read me this thing for!?

Solomon: You know, you've been very sick and you're taking this story very seriously. I think we better stop now.

Mokuba: No I'm okay. I'm okay.

Solomon: *Decides to read again. * Alright, alright, now let's see. Where were we? Oh right the Pit of Despair.

Now we're back to the same scene

Noah: You know… no one in my family has ever taken defeat easily. Come along Joey, bring the body.

Joey: Da body?

Noah: Do you have money?

Joey: Just a little.

Noah: I only hope it's enough to buy a miracle.

Later…

Noah knocks on the door and we see a pair of light purple eyes.

Purple eye guy: Go away.

Noah knocks again

Purple eye guy: What? What?

Noah: Are you the Miracle Marik who worked for the king all those years.

Marik: The king stinking son fired me. And thank you so much for bring up such a painful subject. While you're at it why don't you give me a paper cut and squeeze lemon juice on it? We're closed!

Marik shuts the window and Noah pounds on the door.

Marik: *Opens the window again* Beat it or I'll call the Brute Squad.

Joey: I'm on da brute squad.

Marik: *looks at Joey* You are the brute squad?

Noah: We need a miracle. It's very important.

Marik: Look I decided to quit. And besides why would you hire someone fired by the King's son? I might kill whomever you want the miracle to go to.

Noah: He's already dead.

Marik: He is dead. Well come in, I'll take a look.

Joey and Noah place Seto's body on a table, Marik lifts up Seto's arm and plops down.

Marik: I've seen worse.

Noah: Sir, sir.

Marik: Hah?

Noah: We're really in a terrible rush.

Marik: Don't rush me kid. You rush a Miracle man, you get rotten miracles. You got money?

Noah: 65.

Marik: Sheesh, I've never worked for so little! Except for one time and that was a noble cause.

Noah: This is noble sir. His… wife is… crippled… his children are… on the brink of… starvation.

Marik: -_-; You're a terrible liar.

Noah: I need him to help kill the guy who kidnapped my little brother.

Marik: Your first story was better. Where's that bellows? He probably owes you money. I'll ask him.

*Marik finds a huge bellows. *

Joey: He's dead, he can't talk.

Marik: Look who knows so much. Well, it just so happens that your friend is only mostly dead. There is a big difference between Mostly Dead and All Dead. Please open his mouth

Noah reluctantly opens Seto's mouth and Marik puts the bellows in Seto's mouth and starts to pump.

Marik: Now Mostly Dead is slightly alive. While All Dead… well with All Dead there's usually only one thing that you can do.

Noah: What?

Marik stops pumping

Marik: Search his clothes for loose change. (To Seto) Hey, hello in there. Hey! What's so important? What you got here that's worth living for?

Seto: Tr…ooo…luv

Noah: True love! You heard him. You could not ask for a more noble cause.

Marik: Kid, true love is the greatest thing in the world. Except for a nice MLT. Mutton Lettuce and Tomato Sandwich, where the mutton is nice and lean and the tomato is ripe. They're so perky, I love that. But that's not what he said. He distinctly said "To blave". And as we all know "to blave" means "to bluff". So you're probably playing cards and he cheated.

A girl's voice: Liar! Liar! Li-a-a-ar!

Brooke, a black haired girl with gray eyes, comes running and is glaring at Marik.

Marik: Get back you witch!

Brooke: I'm not a witch, I'm your girlfriend! But after what I heard I'm not sure I want to be that anymore.

Marik: You never had so good!

Brooke: "True Love." He said, "True Love," Marik. Lord

Marik: Don't say another word Brooke.

Brooke: *Turns to Joey and Noah* He's afraid. Ever since Prince Stephen fired him his confidence shattered.

Marik: Why'd you say that name!? You promised me you'd never say that name!

Brooke: *Now she's chasing him* What Stephen? Stephen! Stephen! Ooo-ooo , Stephen!

Marik: I'm not listening.

Brooke: Your teenage years expiring and you don't have the decency to say why you won't help!

Marik: Nobody's hearing anything!

Brooke: *Keeps saying Stephen's name to torment Marik*

Noah: But this is Kisara's true love. If you heal him, he'll stop Stephen's wedding.

Marik: *To Brooke* Shut up. *To Noah* Wait, wait. I make him better, Stephen suffers?

Noah: Humiliations galore!

Marik: Now that's a noble cause! Give me the 65, I'm on the job!

Brooke: Woo-hoo!

Later

Brooke and Marik are dipping a pill thingy in what appears to be chocolate.

Noah: That's a miracle pill?

Marik: You were expecting Monster Reborn in a pill?

Noah: Kind of.

Brooke: The chocolate coating makes it go down easier. But you have to wait 15 minutes for full potency. And you shouldn't go swimming for at least, what?

Marik: An hour.

Brooke: Yeah an hour.

Noah accepts the pill and Joey is carrying Seto who is stiff as a board.

Noah: Thanks for everything! *leaves with Joey and Seto's body*

Marik: Okay!

Brooke: *Waving her hand* Bye boys!

Marik: Have fun storming the castle!

Brooke: Think it will work?

Marik: It will take a miracle!

--------------------------------------------------------

Me: *Finally escaped* Well people we're almost to the end. The last chapter will be long, random, funny, and… and… oh crap I ran out of adjectives to describe the last chapter. Anyway it will take awhile so don't be surprised if you don't see me on this fic for a month. R/R and see ya soon.