Yu-Gi-Oh! Fan Fiction ❯ White Padded Room ❯ Evolution ( Chapter 5 )

Jounouchi's POV is at the bottom this time around. Only one chapter and the epilogue are left after this. Oh, just so you know, you get to further experience the oddity that is their relationship in this chapter.

Chapter Five: Evolution

Days Seventeen (continued)

Jounouchi just looked at him, quite unsure of what how to act right then himself. "Bakura… I think I love you…" Again the words fell of his tongue easily and for a moment, all they could do was look at each other.

"I…" For once in his life Bakura was in a complete state of shock. Time had seemed to slow down at that moment to where it was almost at a complete standstill. The first time Jounouchi had said it, he had thought it was his mind playing tricks on him. The second time, there was no mistaking it. Jou had just confessed his love for him. What was he supposed to say to that? Bakura couldn't tell him he loved him back. Hell, the spirit wasn't even sure if he knew how to love. The only thing he could do was convinced the blonde boy that he was delusional. "You don't love me Katsuya," he said in his normal malicious tone, "I assure you, you can't love me…"

"And I assure you that I do," Jou snapped back at him. It wasn't meant to come out in such a way. But given the tone Bakura had chosen to use to tell him how he felt just then, that's how it came out; full of malice he knew nothing of.

Black-brown eyes belonging to the silver haired spirit narrowed. He spoke sternly, "No." Why was he trying to convince Katsuya that he didn't feel the way that he felt? Bakura didn't know. It seemed to be some unknown desire to protect the blonde from himself. Had it been anyone else he would've probably laughed in their face, thrown the words back at them in the cruelest of ways and enjoy watching them fall to the floor in a sorrowful mass of flesh. But with Jounouchi…

"Why is it so hard for you to accept? Does the thought of me being in love with you repulse you? I would think it's a little late for that!" Katsuya yelled, abruptly cutting off any train of thought Bakura had going. A shy pause then, "Do I repulse you?" He asked softly sounding as if he were hesitant to ask in the first place.

His body tensed when he felt two lips upon his own. It was so unexpected, the reassuring way that they moved against his and even the way the kiss had come about. In then end, Jou had been the one to pull away, shocking the spirit a bit. "No Katsuya… far from it…" Bakura near whispered, not bothering to move himself any farther away from the blonde then they were already.

In one swift motion he had grasped the sides of Bakura's arms, hurling him around so he was now laying underneath the tall blonde rather then over him. Almost out of the blue, Jounouchi had reversed their positions. "Then what's is your problem?" He asked, shouting. He was almost to the point of hysterics at that moment. What Bakura had been saying, the way he acted, none of it made sense to him.

Of course that wasn't about to change either. "You shouldn't love me," Bakura said rather firmly, set off with a childish display of the white haired spirit sticking his tongue out. The way the atmosphere around the two changed was highly laughable. It had gone from hot and heavy, to loving, to angry then to utterly childish and senseless. Though wherever the two hotheaded males were concerned, such paroxysmal behavior was redundant.

"And why not?" Jounouchi hissed the question. He glared down ferociously at the immature male. He had the irking feeling that this so-called-argument would somehow end up in an anything goes, all out pinching and eye poking fight. It wasn't exactly something that Jounouchi was particularly looking foreword to.

"I'm not exactly the type of person anyone should love!" By that time Bakura had also resorted to shouting hysterically. Yet the seemingly childish manner he did it in was about as close to utterly adorable the psychotic white haired man could ever hope to come. "Let alone someone such as yourself." That last part was a bolt from the blue in which left Jounouchi shocked beyond all belief.

This had given Bakura the opportunity to reverse the situation once again. Using a similar method as Jou had done minutes ago, the said male once again found himself lying atop of the unsuspecting blonde.

The sudden shift in positions had knock Katsuya out of his state of shock. His honey-hued eyes blinked several times before he finally asked, "And how exactly are you not the type?" Indeed Jou had a nagging suspicion that it had something to do with Bakura's rather sadistic ways and the poor, poor small animals that where normally on the receiving end of it. Well, small animals and small children.

Bakura growled in frustration. Katsuya was quite the stubborn one. At that he wanted nothing more then to strangle the life out of the blonde. Fortunately he refrained and settled for digging his fingernails into the said boy's shoulders. Jou didn't even seem to notice. "Because of things I've done, Katsuya!" the silver haired spirit near screamed, "I don't deserve your love. I deserve to die rather then to be loved."

"Bakura…" Jou whispered, once again changing the atmosphere around them.

"And what would Yugi think of you falling in love with the likes of me?" The question had made Jounouchi twitch quite visibly. He hadn't heard the name of any of his friends for a while now. Hearing it then seemed…strange. He didn't know how to react to that.

He was filled with a sudden rush of rage. Jou didn't want to hear the names of his friends. That is, if he could even call them friends anymore. Not one of them aside from Ryou had come to visit them. They hadn't even bothered to contact him. Why the hell should he care what Yugi would think? "I don't care about what you may and may not have done or the what you believe you do or do not deserve!" Katsuya was right up in Bakura's face, yelling as ferociously as he could possibly manage, "I know who are you are to me, and how you've acted around me, there isn't anything else that really matters. As for what Yugi thinks, I don't really give a damn!"

"You don't know what you're talking about!" Bakura shouted back with an equal intensity. The blonde beneath him cringed a bit but didn't back down and seeing how Bakura was just as stubborn or more so, he wasn't about to either.

Jou didn't understand exactly why Bakura was being so instant on this. If he was in love with Bakura that was his own choice and it wasn't about to change because of what Bakura thinks he knows. "I know what I'm talking about! Would you like me to say it again? I lov-" He rant was cut short. The hand of the white-haired spirit was clamped tightly over his mouth, making him unable to finish what he was going to say.

"Don't…" Bakura warned, "Just don't…" He pulled his hand away as he left his spot on the bed. "You should get some rest."

Unexpectedly, though he really should have been expecting it, Bakura found he was pulled back onto the bed. He was lying onto of the very blonde who had put him in the position with Jou's arms securely wrapped around his chest. Bakura could feel each breath taken against the side of his neck along with the lips they came from. "Baka! I don't need to rest!" Jounouchi exclaimed in the form of a harsh whisper.

Bakura couldn't suppress a shudder. As Katsuya spoke his lips brushed up against the spot on Bakura's neck they rested upon. It only gave Jou the opportunity to tighten the hold on the spirit. "Stop being so stubborn, dog boy. You need rest…" he hissed the words but did not struggle to free himself from the other's grasp.

A noise of shock was heard coming from Jounouchi. If there was one thing he hated, it was to be called a dog. And for some reason there were too a lot of people who seemed to enjoy referring to him as one. He cringed at the unpleasant memories that came along with the alleged nickname. "I'm not a dog, ass!" the blonde snapped bitterly.

He forced Bakura to turn around and look at him, the overt fury evident in his eyes. Much as the other had done to him before, Jou dug his fingernails into the shoulders of Bakura. He however, pierced the skin letting large rivulets of blood seep from the wounds and trickle down the spirit's arms. Bakura winced at the outburst of violence. "Ow! Baka stop it!" he yelled. Jou didn't bother too respond, he was far too angry.

Luckily for Bakura he was still able to reach Katsuya's arms. He grabbed one of them, twisting it until Jou yelped in pain. "Ow!" the blonde jerked his arm away as fast as he could. He looked at his arm to see if it was all right, then shook his head. There was a highly visible imprint of Bakura's hand where he had grabbed him. Feeling satisfied with himself, Bakura leaned in for another kiss.

As soon as he got close got close Jounouchi growled, biting down on his lip. The spirit twitched pulling away. One of his hands rose up to feel his lips. When he looked at it again it had a small drop of blood on it. "Didn't your master every tell you not to bite, mutt?"

At this Jounouchi could only growl more. He really abhorred being called a dog. Though the fact that he growled constantly and just bit Bakura didn't help his case in the slightest way. "I'm not a dog!" He yelled back in Bakura's face.

"Then stop acting like one!" Bakura snapped back, narrowing his eyes at the irritated blonde.

"I'm not!"

"Yes you are!"

Jou took a moment to blink. Then with a small sigh he crossed his arms over his chest, pouting rather childishly. "Fine! Ugh!" He said snorting much like a twelve-year-old boy arguing with his mother about something that was most likely absurd, would. Bakura could only laugh at him genuinely amused with the way that Jounouchi had chosen to react to this situation.

The said blonde male glared at the white haired spirit, pouting once again as Bakura only continued to laugh. After a few more seconds Jou finally got fed up with the laughter (or more accurately the fact that Bakura was laughing at him), he raised his hand and smacked the spirit's arm.

"Ow! Hey!" Bakura snapped at him rubbing his arm. In truth it hadn't hurt at all since Jounouchi had chosen to hit him more 'playfully' then anything.

"Mosquito," a grin spread across Katsuya's lips as he said that. Bakura only glared.

"I hate you," he said for the second time that day, only to get the exact same reply.

"I know," Jou replied. His smile had since then softened from the victorious (not to mention immature) grin it had been in before and was now more genuine. He exhaled noisily, the smile fading from his lips. "I'm sorry," he said quietly.

Bakura blinked at him for a moment. What did have to be sorry for? Mentally he shrugged it off. Katsuya was odd like that at times. "You shouldn't be…" Bakura replied, poking Jou's arm. The blonde raised an eyebrow at him as if to say, 'oh?'. In return he got one that said, 'if you can be childish, so can I.'

And for a moment, all they did was look at each other. In the end Bakura was the one to say something, shifting from his spot on Jounouchi's bed to make it easier to leave it. "You should go to sleep now," he suggested as he got off of the bed.

"Okay…" Katsuya replied. With that Bakura turned to leave.

As Bakura was walking away he was stopped but Jounouchi grabbing onto his arm. The grip was light enough. If he wanted to he could easily brush it off. That is, if he wanted to. "Stay… please…" the small plea from behind had made him stay. Jou normally wasn't the type to beg, but it was clear that he was right then.

"I…" Nothing was allowed to be said for soon Bakura felt himself pulled into a kiss. Katsuya's hand was still placed on his arm, creating a small force to hold him there. The other hand was entwined with the unwashed gray locks of hair, insuring that Bakura wouldn't pull away. Jou's tongue easily slips past Bakura's loosely shut lips, brushing against his teeth which part for him. The fair-haired spirit's arms lay limply at his sides, unsure of what he should do. He shivered when Jou's tongue swept across the roof of his mouth, something the blonde would be sure to remember for later use.

Once again Bakura felt himself being lowered to the bed by the forceful hands of Jounouchi as the equal forceful tongue thrill his mouth. Well aware of the fact that Bakura wasn't likely to respond, Jou pulled away. "Stay…" he said again. This time it was not a plea but more of a demand.

Those honey-hued eyes where searching Bakura's own for some sort of an answer yet all he got was the distant expression. Jou let his hands drop from the positions in which they had been giving up and willing to let Bakura go back to his own bed. "All right…" the small whisper had caught Katsuya off guard. Yet not near as much as the kiss that followed it.

Yet again Jou found himself at the mercy of the ferocious spirit as his tongue relentlessly raided his mouth. The slender but calloused hands roamed his body, running over Jou's back letting the equally slim fingers dance upon the skin. They trailed further down slipping themselves behind the elastic waistband of sweatpants the hospital had provided, tugging them downwards.

The assault on Katsuya's mouth ended with a harsh tug on the lip, ripping the flesh open at one part so bright red blood trickled down from it. The tear had erected a sharp his from the blonde's mouth. With a satisfied smirk Bakura proceeded to lap up the previously mentioned stream of blood. A trail of wet kisses followed creating a path from his lips down to his chin, up his jaw and back again. From there they traveled down to Jou's neck pressing against the tender skin firmly, leaving behind light lip shaped bruises. Bakura's eyeteeth grazed across the surface of the blonde's shoulder extracting hisses, shrieks and moans from the other's throat.

As the lips proceeded to ravish the smooth chest Bakura's hands busied themselves elsewhere. His fingers had curled around the band of Jou's sweatpants, rolling them down slowly to enrapture the boy, but never give him enough to satisfy. He wanted to tantalize Katsuya until he begged. Bakura had made his way down to the sleek torso area, thrusting his tongue in and out of Jou's navel in a crude display of what's to come.

He pulled the sweatpants a little lower, so that they were pooled around Jounouchi's knees. Bakura retreated from devouring the blonde in vigorous kisses spread across his body, pulling himself upwards as he finished the removal of the annoying sweatpants. They discarded carelessly on the floor. He once more dominated the blonde's mouth with heated kisses. Whether or not they were full on, leave-you-breathless or soft and sweet closed mouth kisses was determined at random. "Bakura?" Jou whispered in-between the wide array of kisses.

Bakura pulled away, just enough so he could look into the other's caramel colored eyes, "Hmm?"

"I love you," Katsuya said softly, pressing a soft kiss on the other's lips. Surprisingly there were no objections this time, no yelling or fighting. Just the feel of two lips against his own, that was all.

The dark eyes of the silver haired spirit blinked as he pulled away. Bakura was unsure of what to say yet again. He wasn't as stunned this time around, so saying something was an oddly more difficult task then the first time around. He just searched for something to say, gazing into the other's features. A small sigh escaped his lips before he finally said, "…I love you too, Katsuya."

"Really?" Jou all but squeaked. Truly he hadn't been expecting it… though he wasn't exactly expecting anything. If anything he had suspected to be silenced again.

"I don't know," Bakura said. His hand reached up, brushing a few locks of hair away from Jounouchi's eyes. Much to his dismay they fell back in place as if to mock him. He didn't need stubborn stands of hair to tell him he wasn't good at this romantic seme gig. "But I could try."

"Re-"

"Katsuya," the spirit snapped, letting his eyes narrow, "if you don't shut up not only will I take it back but I'll beat you until you're blind, deaf, paralyzed and in a coma."

At this Jou could do nothing but laugh. Of course this only caused Bakura's glare to strengthen. "Fair enough," was the only thing he said before he was pulled into another kiss.

Day Eighteen

Another day had approached. This one starting of much better then the last. Jounouchi had felt slightly more energize having gained a lot of rest from passing out from sheer exhaustion twice the day before. It wasn't the best way to get sleep, but hey, it seemed to work. At least he wasn't fainting randomly anymore.

Despite the amount of forced sleep he had gotten, Jounouchi still felt like crap. Sure he had that little bit of extra energy but it didn't stop him from getting dizzy or dragging his feet along everywhere he had to walk. It would probably lessen once he got some food in his system. Seeing how he just woke up ten minutes ago and it was now time for his daily visit to Dr. Tenmai, it would be a few hours before he would be able to eat.

He approached the office and walked into the door. Not through, but right into it. Jou took a step back, almost falling over in the process. "What the…?" he muttered rubbing his throbbing nose. Katsuya looked down at the door, glaring at it for a second as if it had been all its fault. He blinked, "Oh right…got to open first… oops…"

When he opened the door the unusually cheery face of Deneen greeted him. He never did understand exactly how she could always seem so happy all of the time. "Hey there, Jounouchi," she greeted merrily, "you're looking much better today. Did you finally get some sleep?"

"A little," Jou replied sitting down on the couch that was waiting for him. "What did you want to talk about today?"

"I was actually wanted to discuss the possibilities of you having BPD."

"BPD?"

"It's short for 'Borderline Personality Disorder'," She explained in a fairly monotone fashion. Doctors always seemed to get that way when saying something that their patients most likely wouldn't enjoy hearing about. "People suffering from BPD often experience often experience a repetitive pattern of disorganization and instability in mood, self-image, behavior and close personal relationships. Some, or more technically, most of the patients with BPD are often smart or appear to have warm personalities. This appearance is maintained for years at a time until it crumbles. Though I suppose I should be getting to the symptoms, hmm?

"Symptoms of BPD have been broken down into four groups: affect, cognition, impulse action patterns and impersonal relationships. Let's start with affect. Affect ten symptoms all together: chronic or major depression, helplessness, hopelessness, worthlessness, guilt, anger, anxiety, loneliness, boredom, and emptiness. Next would be cognition, which has four symptoms: odd thinking, unusual perceptions, nondelusional paranoia, and quasipsychosis. Thirdly we have impulse action patterns. There are four again here: substance abuse or dependence, sexual deviance, manipulative suicide gestures, and other impulsive behaviors. Last there's impersonal relationships containing ten symptoms: intolerance of aloneness, abandonment, engulfment and annihilation fears, counter dependency, stormy relationships, manipulativeness, dependency, devaluation, masochism or sadism, demandingness, and finally, entitlement.

"All of these are fairly common in human behavior so it is really hard to tell when a person has BPD. However, Jounouchi, you suffer from many of these symptoms in more severe ways then most do. Not only that but BPD cannot stand on its own since it has no 'pure' form. There are only a small number of things that help bring BPD about, you have two of the more common ones. Jounouchi, you told me before that your father abused you physically up until a few months ago. 75% of children either sexual or physically abused developed BPD. The other one you have is substance abuse, which 54% of substance abusers have BPD."

"So you really think I have it?" Jounouchi asked, leaning back against the couch. Deneen only nodded her head. "How do you treat it?"

"I can't give you any medications aside from the ones you're already on, they should help a bit but not much. It's going to take years of out-patient therapy and even then I can't guarantee it will be cured," she said sighing, "I'll switch you over to out-patient care in ten days. I don't want to release you without out being completely sure that this is what's going on."

Sometime while I was "fighting" with Bakura, I realized something: I couldn't fight with him. Apparently that works vise-versa also otherwise it would've ended up something other then a childish brawl.

There is one thing completely undeniable about the way we had acted that day. It was fun, more fun than I had had in a long while. How many people will allow you to take all your pent up stress out on them while letting you laugh as you did it? I understood then better then I had before exactly why I was so attracted to Bakura.

He's not as he has said "the type that shouldn't be loved". When he wants to he lets himself go and has some fun. Not very many people know how to do that now days. Everyone is always worried about what the "mature" thing to do is. With Bakura it's different, obviously. He's lived as long as he has and he can still act like a four year old if he feels like it.

Of course it's not like Bakura always acts like a four year old. As I'm sure he's proved many times, he could be rather frightening if he wishes to be. After all he isn't exactly the sanest of people. He did skin a cat for no reason. I still feel sorry for that cat…

I suppose that's not really the point I'm trying to make. I'm attracted to Bakura, aside from the obvious he's drop dead gorgeous reason, because unlike everyone else I am not obligated to give him anything and same on this end too. If there's anything that the other wants, we just take it. Well, at least Bakura does apparently. I on the other hand am a stubborn ass who will sit there and drive myself crazy with my wants until Bakura smacks some sense into me. Sometimes quite literally too, though normally he just settles for name-calling.

I know we don't exactly have what most would conceder a healthy relationship. I'm not even sure if we do conceder what we have a relationship but at least we don't let our aggravations with each other stay inside, growing larger and larger until we die of a self-induced heart attack as some couple seem to do. (Or some people in the case of that bastard Kaiba. I can already see the headlines: "Kaiba Corp. CEO dead! Stress really can kill!".)

We fight and bicker in the oddest of manners as most could very well see but we do have our "special" moments. The moments where Bakura shows a side of him I'm sure not many others have seen. That is if anyone else has at all. When he wants to he can be fairly gentle, though his gentle side is still rough. I wouldn't expect any different of him.

But it's in those moments where my heart races the fastest and my palms sweat the most. I become unnaturally nervous in mind but for some reason my body seems to react fine. I'm beyond thankful for that. I've already made an idiot out of myself more then once. And certainly don't need the help of my less then functional brain to make it worse.

I wonder what goes on in his mind sometimes. Bakura seems to change so suddenly… I don't know if I'll ever be able to understand it, but I suppose I can hope.

~*~*~

I lied in the previous chapter. If there were a lemon to be written for this story it would take place at the end of this chapter, which is technically just the second part of the last chapter. Umm, I have to say I was quite disappointed with the amount of reviews I got for the last chapter. I think the popularity I had is diminishing. (Though Just Insane reviewed and I was so happy I bounced around my room and ran straight into the door) Oh well, at the very least I'll write something for Taito-kisses, Renee the Rabid Squirrel and Chibi-chan since the three are always so nice to me in reviews. ~_^ I always love reading them. I love you guys.

Um yes, that was still a bit on the off side. Oh well. Sorry to use two chapters on one day. The next and final chapter is going to be quite long though. Don't expect it for at least another month, however. ^_^ I'm going to go through and fix all the typos I make while not paying attention.