Yu-Gi-Oh! Fan Fiction ❯ Who am I? ❯ Dreaming of Me ( Chapter 12 )

AN: Sorry to tell some of you but this is going to be a serious chapter. If I could I would write a fic with nothing but fluff, but I can't. My stupid conscience is making me put some plot in here and she needs her memories back. Also since there are actually more people who voted for both boys getting her then Ryou/Anzu I feel that it is sad and with Bakura in the lead I now pronounce this a Bakura/Anzu fic. I'll have to make it up to poor Ryou later. Anyway PLEASE give me feedback on this chapter. It's really serious and I want to know if I went overboard with it. Anyway I hope you enjoy!

Japanese:

Tadaima = I'm home (used when arriving home usually from school)

Kasan = Mom

Tousan = Dad

Disclaimer: I no own Yugioh, though I wish I owned two certain white haired bishies! I'll just have to settle for plushies for now.

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"Who am I?"

Chapter 12: "Dreaming of Me"

"Tadaima," echoed the voice of a small girl around five as she announced her arrival home. Her voice echoed through the empty house. Her head bowed as she came into the house putting her shoes aside and hanging up her coat before going to her room and placing her bag on her desk in a disconnected way. She then went downstairs to start a load of laundry before cooking dinner, most likely ramen again.

What the girl didn't notice was a vague figure standing in the corner, following her, watching her. 'Is this…me,' Anzu, the unseen figure, asked as she watched the small brown haired girl go through her chores almost mechanically. Eating, cleaning, studying, and going to bed. 'This was before…before I met Yugi! This was after….after my parents died…'

The scene suddenly switched to that of a girl at a funeral dressed all in black staring in confusion and pain at the picture of her mother and father in front of the gravestones. "Kasan…Tousan…," the small girl whimpered softly. Then the scene shifted again to a young girl with only one large suitcase being pushed into a house with a distraught looking man and woman. They greeted her and showed her to a room with some of her furniture from her old house. The people were nice but not more than two days later they were both gone on business trips.

"That was when it started," she said softly and felt herself slump to her knees. Her aunt and uncle weren't cruel and it wasn't that they hated her. They just never wanted children; they never knew how to treat them. They didn't treat her bad, just more like a small adult. Leaving her money for food and instructions on how to use things like the washer and dish washer and make ramen for herself. It wasn't a bad life, or very hard. But it was that time, when she would come home and the empty 'tadaima,' would echo through the cold lonely house. Then she had met Yugi.

He, his mother, and his grandfather were all so nice to her. She went over his house often as a child, the area her aunt and uncle lived in was more of the business section of town and not a lot of children lived in the area. So she didn't have a lot of friends. But she didn't need a lot of friends, Yugi was more then enough. 'Yugi-kun,' she thought happily to herself and felt her sorrow lift some.

Once again time shifter. It then shifted to the day that she and Yugi became friends with Jou and Honda. They were bullies who picked on Yugi, she scared them off and tried to bully them a bit herself to keep them away. 'Demo…I didn't need to. Yugi-kun was about to make friends with them.' Somehow it seemed to her Yugi had the kind of attitude that could make him friends with almost anyone. 'Almost,' she thought with a snort as she pictured Marik. 'He's not a miracle worker.' (AN: Not dissin Marik just saying they're not exactly buddies). Something was missing though, she felt like she was overlooking something.

Then she saw it, the day they had all become friends, Yugi had finished the puzzle. She fell to her knees and held her head as all sort of images flashed through her head. 'The millennium items! How could I have forgotten! The puzzle, it belonged to Yugi! And that's where Yami was sealed away! Yami, Yugi's Yami, he was the darker part of Yugi. He had shadow magic, the shadow realm. The other items, other Yami's!' Everything was running through her head so fast. It had finally broken, the dam holding her memories had snapped and everything was rushing so fast she didn't know if she could keep up with it.

Everything and everyone she had met was running through her head. 'Please I can't think straight, I can't stop it! Please someone help me!' She felt like she was drowning in all her memories. Somebody!' It all stopped in an instant as she felt a hand on her shoulder and blue met amethyst as she looked up to the form of Yami.

"Yami," she asked looking up at him as she was still kneeling. He kneeled in front of her coming down to her level.

"Anzu, you're not ready to accept all of this."

"What do you mean? I want my memories back!" She was nearly in tears. The pain from before was harsh but so was not remembering her own life.

"Do you," asked a voice from behind her. She turned and came face to face with the younger version of herself she had been watching earlier.

"Can you really accept everything when your heart says no," asked another voice as another image of herself appeared before her. This one was the same age as her but in her school uniform.

"My heart? Why wouldn't I want to remember?" The poor girl was confused. The two forms looked sadly at her before the younger approached.

"By remembering you have to deal with the issues of your past and how they now conflict with your future."

"I don't understand. What conflict?" Bakura. His image flashed in her head and in that instant her heart ached.

"You don't understand because to understand would cause you pain. You're better off not knowing me for now," said the older version of herself. "Find me once you've found your heart and are ready to deal with it." Before she could say anything her older form turned and walked away melting into the darkness.

"I will help you; I will give you what your heart can handle." The younger girl said gaining Anzu's attention suddenly and became taller and was wearing a high school uniform.

"How much can it handle," Anzu asked her other self.

"Up until we met, right before duelist kingdom," Yami said reminding her of his presence. She rose to her feet and turned to look at him.

"Wait, what about Ryou? And Bakura?" She didn't see the look of sadness that came over her younger self standing behind her.

"In due time," she said before taking Anuz's hand and taking her attention from Yami. "Be happy with the gift I am giving you." She pulled Anzu into an embrace and the scent of Cherry Blossoms filled Anzu's senses as she closed her eyes and felt the warmth from her other self pressed against her. Until the warmth filled her and she was left with her arms wrapped around herself. And a little bit of the hole in her heart was filled. She turned to look for Yami but he was already gone. She was left holding herself in the darkness.

But instead of being afraid or lonely standing there in the darkness alone, she felt safe, almost comforting. Even the light that seemed to surrounding her faded leaving her in the dark. 'My heart, I need to find why pain follows my heart.' She saw something that seemed like a pin point of light ahead of her. It came closer and as it grew she noticed it was attached to a form. A white haired form, but as it came closer it stopped just out of her range of view.

"Who are you?" She felt her heart beat painfully. She knew who it was, she felt her heart twist in pain and somehow in joy. 'What's going on, why am I getting these mixed feelings?' It was then she heard sniffling and turned around to see a huddled form behind her crying her eyes out on the floor, that figure was her. 'Why is she crying? Who is that Ryou or Bakura? What's going on?'

'By remembering you have to deal with the issues of your past and how they now conflict with your future,' the memories of what her other self had said earlier came back to her. "I don't care I want to know what's going on!" (AN: By now you all probably do.). She strode towards the white haired figure and found herself coming face to face with Bakura. The weeping behind her was stifled as she heard a gasp. Her other form was staring at Bakura with a look that was a mixture of pain and longing. She strode over to her other form and kneeled in front of her.

"Why are you so sad? What's the matter with you? Why won't you let me remember," she asked almost desperately.

"I-I can't," she whimpered pathetically.

"Can't what? Tell me! I'm tired of being in the dark, tell me," she all but yelled. "Please," she said as her voice came out weak and pleading.

"I can't love him." She turned to look at Bakura who seemed to be eyeing the two sadly.

"Why? Why can't you love him?"

"Because, the others would never understand. They wouldn't understand!" Before Anzu knew what was happening the other her wrapped her arms around her and pulled her into an embrace sobbing into her chest, the place over her heart soaking quickly with the tears. But as her other form faded into her the wet spot on her chest became damp with her own tears.

"This is what they were talking about." She knew now why she didn't want to remember, the guilt along made her heart want to rip in two. 'I never loved Ryou…I loved Bakura. But the others…they wouldn't understand. They hated him, but why? Because they wouldn't accept him, I decided Ryou was the next best thing. I convinced myself to love Ryou when I really didn't. I've lied to him, my friends, myself. I've lied to everyone. I'm just a fake!' She felt the tears renew their assault on her face as she began openly sobbing.

She gasped as she felt two strong arms encircle her and pull her close. She felt his breath on her cheek as he spoke. "You're stronger then this." She felt herself start to relax into his arms. "Stop lying and start telling the truth. Make things right for you, and your heart."

'Can I really fix all of this? And why…why did I have to lie? What is there I can't remember that is so important? Why can't I remember you…Bakura?' She felt her eyes close and the darkness take her.

She opened her eyes, and saw nothing but the darkness again. But she knew this wasn't her dream again. She knew because she noticed the odd stench in the room of the hotel. But it still felt like her dream. More so because she found herself once again in Bakura's arms and felt the strength in them. But she felt so exhausted and before she could try to start righting her wrongs she fell back asleep.

Somewhere in the dark two figures stood together contemplating about a certain young brunet. "Do you really think she can handle all she's just seen?" Anzu's older form, the one that had left her earlier turned to her white haired companion as he took her in his arms.

"She's a strong girl. I think she'll be ok. But I don't think she'll be too happy when she finally remembers the tomb robber that tried to take over the world and tried to kill her and her friends countless times."

"She won't be happy. But you can't help who you fall in love with…I only hope what I'm seeing from him is true. If not, he could break her…"

AN: OK, lots of notes here. Sorry if I was vague on the memories, but unfortunately my only source of Yugioh is Shonen Jump and cartoon network (for right now). Actually I'm supposed to get the first 75 Jap ep.s from a trade soon! ^^ Anyway sorry about that and PLEASE give me feedback on Anzu's background. I hate making up background BUT I know next to nothing except she met Yugi in kindergarten after he let her borrow a gameboy and she broke it and I haven't seen her parents anywhere. And I accidentally made a little plot hole by forgetting to mention Yugi's mom was away. And yes he has a mom! At least in the manga! Hope I didn't confuse too many of you. I tried to spell it out as much as possible while keeping it mysterious. Anyway thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed it!