Yu Yu Hakusho Fan Fiction / InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Why? ❯ Where Do Babies Come From? ( One-Shot )

[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]

Where Do Babies Come From?

Disclaimer: We don't own Yuyu Hakusho or Inuyasha. If we did… Hiei's mine, she can have Kagome!

Warning: Penis' will appear randomly. Two perverts are working together for this one so some serious shitte is gonna hit le fan.

Co-Warning: This is a lemony fic.

Authors: (Chrystal-Hearts) \\xXMCRangelXx\\

Speaking in one's own mind shall be underlined.

-------------------------------------------------------------- --

“Where are we going?”Shippo asked as the group paused for what seemed the millionth time that day.

“I sense a demon nearby.”Inuyasha said as he glared at the kit.

“I don't sense anything.”

“That's because you're a useless runt.”The hanyou grunted at him.

“I'm not useless.”The kit whined only to be hit on the head.

“Leave Shippo alone, he's still young.”Kagome said as she started glaring at the inu-hanyou.

“Shut the fuck up bitch, no one asked you.”

“Sit boy!”The girl called out as she gracefully stomped on his back and right over him, making him howl in pain. “You're such a jerk! Come on Shippo.”The girl said as she waited for the kit to jump onto her shoulder. “We'll come back when Sango and Miroku do.”

“Get back here you stupid bitch.”

Deep breath. “Sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit and sitfor good measure!”

//\\

//--\\

\\--//

\\//

Yoko Kurama chuckled from a tree as he stared down at the inu hanyou steaming in the crater the ningen had dug for him. And what a niceand deepcrater it was he thought with a smirk. His mind switched swiftly, however, from the crater to the woman that had dug it. She was beautiful and intelligent as well as powerful. She also had something Yoko wanted. Two somethings in fact. And he could get them both from her with his kitsune seduction.

Kuronue landed on the branch across from him and recognized the kitsune's unmistakable smirk. He wanted something, and foxes had a tendency to go after what they wanted.

“What are you going after and how badly are you going to be hurt when you come back?” the bat demon asked with a small smile.

“Why, my bat, whatever do you mean?”

“You know exactly what I mean, Yoko Kurama,” Kuronue replied sternly.

“Oh, well… We were already planning to steal the Shikon No Tama from the priestess who holds it, and she is quite a delicious looking one at that, so I figured there would be no harm in having a little taste while I retrieve the Jewel,” Yoko replied a little defensively.

Kuronue paused to ponder his lover's logic. “You… are going to go… chasing… after a… miko… that can purify you on the fucking spot?! You are definitely a silver kitsune. Only a silver could be so stupid,” Kuronue growled.

“Why, Kuronue, there are other foxes that are much less intelligent than I,” Yoko replied teasingly.

//\\

//--\\

\\--//

\\//

Hiei moved through the trees with an ease that few had. It didn't take him long to find a demon to battle, but the problem was it was already chasing after some foolish ningen. So he sat in a tree and watched as the onna ran for her life. After tripping and the demon taking a swipe at her, she screamed, but not in fear. “Dammit! That's it!”Rolling onto her back she thrust her hand out at the demon and said “burn in hell”and it probably felt like it was, as it was encased in purple flames.

“A miko?”Hiei questioned as he looked down at the ningen.

Kagome shakily rose to her feet as she cursed under her breath enough to make Inuyasha proud. Speaking of which, he should have been here by now. As soon as the demon began coming after her, she'd sent Shippo to fetch him.

Back with Shippo. “But Inuy….”

“I don't want to hear it.”The hanyou replied as he tied something over the kit's mouth and tossed the tied up kit into the tree branches.

Back with Kagome. The girl suddenly paused as she looked up into the tree. “Who's there?”

A demon in all black dropped down. “If you could purify like that, why not do it in the first place?”

Of course, she didn't hear his question, she was too busy looking over his body. “Are you a god?”She managed to get out before collapsing on the spot from energy loss.

“A god?”He questioned himself as his ego swelled and he walked over to her body. A dark smirk appeared on his lips as an idea came to mind. Yes, he decided that he liked that idea. Picking up her body, he quickly disappeared to return to his cave to the north.

//\\

//--\\

\\--//

\\//

Yoko went to grab a rose seed out of his hair, planning to “wrap” up both the argument and his lover with it, only to catch a small red kitsune kit that was tied up and flying through the air. Both of their minds suddenly torn away from their argument and soon to be fight, Kuronue and Yoko stared at the kit as he attempted to speak past his gag. Yoko used a single claw to cut the piece of cloth bound around the kit's mouth.

“HELP ME!” he screamed as he struggled to break out of the fox's grip.

Yoko clamped a hand down over the kit's mouth and prayed that no one heard his scream. Slowly, the kit calmed to realize that the golden eyes belonged to another kitsune, and not the damned dog demon bitch, Inuyasha. Finally, he stopped moving and began to breathe normally. Yoko removed his hand and allowed the kit to speak his piece.

“My momma's been attacked by a demon! You have to help her!” the kit cried out.

“Our argument must wait, Kuronue,” Yoko said, suddenly serious again; his dual attack lost but not completely forgotten.

//\\

//--\\

\\--//

\\//

“Inuyasha, where. Is. Kagome?”Sango seethed out as she glared at the hanyou whom was backing away from her.

“I would like to know that as well.”Miroku stated as he glared at the half-demon.

“The bitch left.”

And the hanyou found hiraikotsu slammed into his head, knocking him unconscious. “I think we need to teach our hanyou friend a lesson.”Sango said as she glared at him.

“Yes, a lesson.”The monk murmured in agreement as he began smiling wickedly. “I have just the thing.”

//\\

//--\\

\\--//

\\//

Emerald eyes slowly opened and took in what appeared to be the inside of a cave. Water seemed to be falling heavily outside. “W-where am I?”The loss of energy was still affecting her.

“In my home.”Said a deep voice. Kagome shivered, and it had nothing to do with the temperature. Slowly Kagome's eyes roved over the man's body…nudebody. “And it seems you're overdressed, I can help you with that.”Kagome eeped as her clothes fell in shreds around her body. Lust was already tinting her green eyes.

//\\

//--\\

\\--//

\\//

Inuyasha's golden eyes opened and he tried to talk, but found that he could not. Then his mind began supplying memories of what he'd done. Widened eyes looked to his left to see that there was in fact someone sleeping at his side. Trying to move proved to not work as his ass hurt like hell. Why the fuck did I do that? And with Sesshoumaru no less!

Snickering had him looking to his other side and his eyes widened. “Hope you had as much fun bottoming as I did topping, Inuyasha.”

Fucking kill me now! I fucking slept with both Sesshoumaru andKouga!

“Don't forget me love.”Said a dark haired demon as he ran his hands over the mating mark he'd placed on Inuyasha's groin. “I had fun topping you as well.”

And now Inuyasha fainted, his last thoughts being not Naraku too…

//\\

//--\\

\\--//

\\//

Kagome woke to find herself sore, but she still felt good. Closing her eyes, images replayed through her mind. “Harder!”She could hear herself screaming. And now she knew that she was once again growing moist. A chuckle had her looking to her left and blushing. “Ready for another go?”Emerald eyes flashed gold before she began attacking the crimson eyed man with kisses. “I'll assume that's a yes.”

//\\

//--\\

\\--//

\\//

Shippo led the silver kitsune and his bat demon friend to the spot where his mother had fallen only to find a pile of ash and…

“No momma…” Shippo whispered under his breath. Suddenly he caught the scent of pine and smoke on the ground where his mother's scent stopped. Assuming the worst, Shippo ran after the trail, leading Yoko and Kuronue to run after him. They recognized the scent of an old and very dangerous friend, and knew it would be a bad idea to let the small kit chase him down.

As they came upon the cave their friend called home, Kuronue froze, but Yoko scooped up the small kit and put him down next to his lover's leg.

“Wait here while we go inside,” Yoko told the red kit as he grabbed Kuronue's wrist and tugged. Breaking his paralysis, Kuronue followed Yoko inside the dark cave and found… Hiei fucking the Shikon Miko. Kuronue leaned over to his partner's ear and commented that said fire demon had a nice ass.

A growl drew their attention to Hiei and a question resounded in their minds. “What the fuck are you doing here?”

With a smirk, Youko replied “watching.”

“Enjoying the view.”Kuronue commented as he stared lustfully at Hiei's ass…Then Kagome's clit. “And a nice view it is.”

//\\

//--\\

\\--//

\\//

“Kagome?”Miroku asked before he froze and looked on wide eyed.

“What is it Miro…”Now she too saw it.

“Hiei!”< i>Kagome screamed around Kuronue's thickness while the kitsune drove into her ass and Hiei into her center. Too many sensations were running through her body as all three pounded into her pliant body. Her mother never told her that sex could feel thisgood.

The monk suddenly smirked as he turned to the slayer. “Let's as they say, do as the Roman's do.”Ten minutes later and another female could be heard moaning and screaming, but she was calling out a certain monk's name.

Youko smirked as he came hard into Kagome's tightening passage. I'm glad Hiei has a barrier around this place.He could tell as both Hiei and Kuronue came. The girl dutifully swallowed all he had to offer…though she hadn't really a choice in that as his lover's cock wasdown her throat. Hiei also drove harder into her his final time. Looking at them and at the still ready girl, he smirked darkly. “Perhaps we should invite Yusuke over.”

//\\

//--\\

\\--//

\\//

“Inuyasha?” Shippo questioned as he looked at the hanyou before falling over laughing as said hanyou's nod. Kouga was on one side, Sesshoumaru on the other, and Naraku was bringing up the rear. All held smirks as they looked at the hanyou. Said hanyou was wearing a pink frilly kimono that had little kittens patterned all over it. Not only that, but they'd somehow died his hair blue!

//\\

//--\\

\\--//

\\//

“Momma?” Shippo asked as he looked up at his pregnant mother.

“Yes sweeite?”She asked as she changed one of her other children's diapers. Three other little ones were playing in the field.

“Where do babies come from and how are they made?”

-------------------------------------------------------------- --

And here is our one-shot…I know, a little…odd. Hey, it could've been worse.

Odd? It's more than odd! It's screwed up…and hilarious…but it was even more fun to write than to read, twas it not, Chrystal?

Screw? Don't mind if I do Angel, just not you! Muah hahaha. Sorry, my head is…in the sewer. That's lower than the gutter, right? Anyways, it was fun to write, but I hope you all think it's fun to read!