Yu Yu Hakusho Fan Fiction ❯ Bindings (My Kitsune 5) ❯ Bindings ( Chapter 7 )

[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]

Bindings 7 (NYC 11-23-02)
by : Baby Nyx

..."Your reason and your passion are the rudder and the sails of your seafaring soul.
"If either your sails or your rudder be broken, you can but toss and drift, or else be held at a standstill in mid-seas.
"For reason ruling alone, is a force confining; and passion, unattended, is a flame that burns to its own destruction."...

-Kahlil Gibran fr. The Prophet


I felt Kurama's proximity and I opened an eye to look for him, he wasn't in the rooms yet but... I touched my neck and felt a thin silken braid where a leather cord should have been. I smiled and rubbed my thumb over his hair, it was infused with his prescence, I can feel fox magic imbedded into every strand and every weave. He's given me a charm to protect me in his absence, hn, like I needed one but, that was very thoughtful of him.

Feathers? Ah... yes I remmember, I don't recall tearing a pillow apart but I do remmember a dream where Kurama gazed at me with unrestrained passion in his eyes while snow fell all around us.

So it wasn't snow, it was feathers from this pillow. I moved my legs and stopped almost immediately, I knew right then that walking was out of the question.

I'm sore, it dosen't hurt as much as it's suppose to and I feel like he's still inside me, it feels... sticky and... he wouldn't dare leave me uncleaned!

I parted my legs and ducked under the sheets, the scent of that bitter leaf confirmed that he did take care of me. Hn, I was wondering why it didn't hurt like it used to, that medicine is keeping the worse of the pain away, but still, I was hurt bad enough to get sick.

I'm cold...

I sighed pulled my knees up to my chest and covered myself with the thick warm comforter. As I moved, I felt a trickle of something wet between my legs, I smiled and closed my eyes again.

I must have dozed off, because next thing I know I was on my belly with Kurama's cool weight covering me. I sighed and took a deep breath of the Youko's prescence. His lips touched my temple, then a cool, damp cloth covered the back of my neck. I shivered both from the cloth and the brush of his tail as it settled against my knees and ankles.

Gods I feel like crap... my eyes are burning, I feel weak and weightless, I'm parched, my jagan is pulsing and giving me a headache...

His weight made breathing a little hard but it was soothing, I felt safe and secure. Aside from his natural scent I smell mints, water, chocolate and coffee on his breath, the scent of someone's lipstick and make-up on his cheeks, there were various food smells on his skin and hair too.

"You didn't eat lunch?" I asked.

"Nope, I eat when you eat." he whispered then kissed my ear, the warmed washcloth was taken off me and I heard him dipping it in water, I realized there was something fragrant and herbal in that water he was using. He reapplied the towel over my cheek and what part of my forhead he could reach, I shivered at the cold touch of it "Your burning up."

"Hn, that's to be expected." he sighed and took his weight off me. I frowned and opened an eye to look at him, he just smiled and I saw how worried he was. He turned me gently over to my back, and made me sit. I caught sight of the glass basin on the bed with what looked like very light green tea with flowers floating in them.

"Drink this." he gave me a cup of something that smelled of different herbs and looked brightly fuschia. It was steaming hot and one whiff of it cleared my headache instantly. I sipped some and swallowed the rest in big thirsty gulps, it hit the spot just right.

I sighed with relief and gave him back the cup. He looked inside the cup with a raised brow before he set it aside.

"What?" I asked as I settled back down on the bed. Ch, I'm achy everywhere...

"The water in that teacup was about 30 seconds from being freshly boiled and the water in this basin is at body temperature." he said softly before he began wiping me down with the cool cloth.

Damn, and he feels cool to me too, I must really be sick.

I sighed and covered my eyes with my forearm, he's definitely feeling guilty about all this... how can I get him out of the guilt trip he's putting himself through right now?

I found the scent of the water strangely envigorating and soothing at the same time, the sound of it, as he squeezed the washcloth, was the only sound in the room. His gentle but firm hands stroked, kneaded and scrubbed my achy muscles and oversensitive skin. Then he left a kiss on every part of me he finished washing.

He kissed my face my neck, my shoulders, my elbows, wrists, each finger, shoulder blades, well, you get the point.

He cleaned me down there too, touching me gently, chewing and reapplying that bitter nasty herb.

But overall, it was a damned sensous expirience, all my aches were melting away, my headache was gone and I don't feel so dry anymore. I wanted him to go on forever, caressing me like this, hmmmm even the cloth stopped feeling so cold and scratchy, his hands are warm now...

I felt his lips on the sole of my foot before he took my forearm off my eyes. I opened my mouth to tell him bluntly that I participated in this but he sealed my lips with a finger and a resigned nod.

"I know baby, I know." he whispered, then he wrinkled his nose at me and snorted "You smell like a badly injured fox." I let that remark pass I don't have a lot of smart retorts right now. He wrung the cloth out one more time in the water, folded it and placed it on my forhead before he lay on top of me again. I sighed and wrapped my arms around his neck.

"How do you feel right now?" he asked.

"Better." and it was true, I am getting stronger by the minuite. Wait... "Kurama, your youki...?"

"Aa, giving you some back, I think I had been feeding on the energy you give out when we make love."

"What?" I opened my eyes to look at him, he reached over towards the night table and pressed a lump of something dark on my lips, I smelled chocolate so I opened my mouth.

"Your body is catabolizing reserves right now, this and that tea should provide you with a quick sugar boost but you need a decent meal if possible."

Hmm it was chocolate, I crushed it between my teeth and something like bittersweet liquid fire burst inside my mouth. His lips were on me before I could do anything about it sucking some of the chocolate and the... liquor? What ever it was it was so good it made me groan.

"It's orange Kirsch, sweet ne?" he said with an impish smile as he pulled away leaving me breathless.

I looked dumbly at him for a few breaths before I managed to say "It was... damn you." I frowned at him "You love doing this to me don't you?"

"What?" he said with a fake innocent smile, I glared at him and he chuckled softly "Introducing fine liquor filled chocolates you can't have a lot of?" He licked my frowning lips "Aren't you glad you at least had a taste of them? I bought an entire box with different liquors for you."

I sighed and looked at the ceiling pass his head "How many can I have per day?" I grumbled.

"We'll find out, but first you need to eat lunch."

"Don't want to. Too tired." I put my forearm back over my eyes and the now warm wash cloth.

"No choocolaaate." he said in a sing song voice.

I knew that was coming, " Ch, your too predictable." I grumbled. Something sticky and wet brushed my lips, I licked the melted bittersweet chocolate and took my forearm off my eyes.

"This is cognac." he said before he put the black moulded chocolate between his teeth and kissed me. Bittersweet fire filled my senses and burned it's way down my throat. I moaned as we sucked and battled for the melting bits and pieces in each others mouths, with hungry, no, ravenous kisses. He pulled away from me gasping for breath and my lips felt swollen and raw from that kiss.

"Your evil!" I shouted at him my hands still tangled in his tresses, he chuckled merrily. "I want more." I demanded.

"Later, lunch is almost here, I ordered out while they were having lunch," He replied while he pulled my fingers off his hair like he would pull leaves and grass "I had some coffee and a danish but I'm starving for some real food. You know what? I don't think we've had a decent meal together since yesterday lunch." he said mostly to himself because I was too busy being grumpy.

I glared stubborly at him even if I knew I had already lost.

"Later baby, that's dessert." he tapped my nose lightly with a chocolate sweet finger.

"Pure evil." I told him and he gave me his fox-got-the-chicken smile.

"You bet I am." he kissed my nose quickly and I missed the opporturnity to swat him away.

I sighed and just accepted my fate, I'm too lazy to get worked up over it and he is right. Champagne and crackers with some meats and cheeses for supper, no breakfast... I should be hungry but I think my stomach isn't fully awake or something. "Is it here yet?" I asked impatiently.

He laughed softly "Tell you what baby, I'll let you have as much as you want, until-you-pass-out all-you-can-eat choclate liquors 'after' we have lunch okay? I need you to eat some soba noodles."

"Soba? Why?" I asked frowning, as he put the box of chocolates inside the drawer of the night table.

"Well, I didn't mean to feed on you, you feel wasted because I kinda drained some of your youki."

I raised a brow "Kinda?" I feel abnormally fatigued, I want him to rectify that statement because he WAS feeding on me.

"I don't really need to... 'feed' right now and I think it's because of my proximity to you. You let out an awful lot of youki when your not trying to hide yourself, which is almost never, and it's actually enough to satisfy me, I don't need much with this human body. You would not have felt the drain, by the way, if we had only made love for a short period of time. Oooh," he brightened "maybe that's why kissing you feels so good!" He grinned and nuzzled my neck "My baby is so strong!"

I pushed at his forhead until I could glare at him again. "Why didn't you ask me? I would have let you."

"I would have asked you if I needed it, I'm a decent fox when it comes to ki you know. I'm sorry baby, but don't worry you'll know when I do it actively, you won't miss it." he winked at me and kissed the center of my chest. "So, may I have your permission?"

I raised a brow at him and said "Hell no."

His brows went up in surprise before he huffed, blowing air up into his bangs "Mou... I was better off not telling you, che." he looked away from me with what looked like a pout. "I could have said it was because you were hurt and stuff, yeah should have just tricked you, more fun that way." I failed to suppress the smirk that was threatening to break free, I yanked his head back towards me and kissed him thoroughly. He smiled and poked his fingers at my ribs which made me gasp and jerk involuntarily away from his hand "Your so mean to me Hiei."

"This is revenge, deal with it." and I did smirk at him.

"What?" he frowned "You vindictive little bastard, is this because of the chocolate?"

"Aa." I replied cooly.

"You little monster." I caught is head before he could try and bite me or nuzzle me again, we struggled until he realized he can't get near me without using excessive force. He huffed one more and let me carry the weight of his head "I guess I'll have to deal with it, it's not like I can trade you in or anything. I'm stuck with you." he shook out my damp towel and reapplied it over my forhead.

He may look glum, he may have acted pissed but I can see and feel the tip of his tail swishing the air from side to side and that was a better indicator of his mood.

I sighed heavily, I had to resort to body language to know his real moods. He looked at me with a question in his eyes and since I didn't feel like answering why I sighed like that I decided to parry.

"I remmeber tales of the last kyubi of the northern territories." I said recalling a story I overheard in the Makai a long time ago. "There was this nine-tails who destroyed an entire forest in the Ningenkai centuries ago before he was sent back to the Makai by monks helped by other youkos in the service of Inari."

"Yes, that was my otosama." he sighed heavily, for real this time, and he rolled his eyes.

"Really?" I looked at him, I had suspected it but had never found a reason to ask. " You mean, I'm to be married to a prince of youko's?"

"Shut up." He pulled the towel down to cover my face. "I don't want that title, I'm just Kurama, vagabond thief extraordinaire, nothing more."

So it was him, the legendary heir of the wild silver northern youkos who ran off and was never heard from again.

I have a real prince of demons in my arms? I find that rather amusing.

"Kchu!" I took a peek from under the rapidly warming towel just in time to watch him cover his nose and mouth and sneeze again with his forehead pressed against my chest.

"Damned feathers, we have to get this bed cleaned." he said while he sniffled. He looks so... I wanted to laugh, I wanted to bite him, I want to make him mine all over again.

My very own Prince.

I reached out and flattened the little short hairs that were sticking out from the top of his head. Hn, must be where he took the hair he used to make my necklace.

"Didn't have time to fix that, I was in a hurry. We ran out of conditioner and we don't have any hair stuff." he said as he ran his fingers through his hair.

"We better buy a lot of conditioner, you use so much of it." and it's true. I'm not sure what the real purpose of that stuff is beyond changing the scent and feel of his hair but Shuichi uses a fourth of the bottle everytime he washes his mane, and last I looked there wasn't a fourth left. I can imagine the youko needing more than that for his extravagant head of silk, and that tail of his, we have to prioritize that on the shopping list.

"That's because we bathe a lot." He nuzzled my neck again "Hmmm, your fever is manageable now," and in a voice that sent chills down my spine he said "we need a bath." There's that look in his eyes!

"D-did you hate your sire?" I asked to distract him, he's in that I-wanna-eat-you mood, and I don't think I'm up for that kind of sex right now.

He looked at me askance but then he smiled knowingly "Yes, passionately." he replied. "We didn't see eye to eye in a lot of matters, and I'm not interested in his territories, they can take care of themselves." he smiled and raised himself on an elbow "I'll give it all up, all over again just to be here by your side." he said while he twirled a finger over one of my sore nipples. "C'mon, trust me a little baby, I wouldn't do something you can't handle at your current state."

"That's the point you stupid kitsune." I growled at him as I removed his finger from my chest, I was getting aroused the heat has gone up to my neck "I'm too..." he kissed my fingers and gave me a mischiviouse smile "Kurama." I warned him.

"Just teasing baby, seriously, I don't think it's a good idea to um... rough you up right now. I just can't help it, I love teasing you and you should be used to it by now." he sucked on my two fingers, and gently nibbled them. "Hmm, you're body's become so responsive."

I sighed and focused my attention on making that part of my anatomy remain dormant. What he said was true and I guess that can't be helped, his eyes closed as he twirled his tounge around my digits drawing a heavier aroused sigh out of me.

He had always teased me like this but, I guess this fever had dramatically shortened my temper "Tell me," I swallowed hard, gods I have to stop that devilishly skilled tounge of his cause if I don't I will end up begging him to make love with me "Tell me about your youth, your father."

He let my fingers go with a final suck "You want to know more? But it's all in the past baby, done and irretrivable."

"But it's still a part of you. It's what made you what you are now."

He sighed and rested his head on my shoulder. "Hmmm, my father is a visionary." he settled down on my side with half his body over me, he began wiping me with that warmed almost dry towel while he spoke "He wanted to prove that foxes can be great without being subject to Inari's will. He's a tengen kitsune see? And silver white, silver foxes are automatically designated as the messenger of the gods, me included, both his parents were servants of Inari. But like my father I decided I didn't want to serve any god."

"Tengen? He uses the powers of heaven?"

"Aa, he's got holy powers because he used to serve Inari in his youth, and a lot more. He can bend time, and use lightning and the winds, he can cause hurricanes and typhoons and thunderstorms with a swish of his tails. That's why he's a bit dissapointed in me because I took after my mother, she's an earth elemental and I grew flowers." he gave a bitter little laugh.

"But the old man saw something in me that made him decide I am his rightful heir. I mean he has a son who inherited his powers, and several who are older and stronger than me, but he didn't even notice them, it's me he kept going out of his way to train.

"He's very busy see? After he took this modest territory from an older kyubi he expanded it, he created the only kingdom of kitsunes ever and managing it is an increadible hassle. Because foxes by nature are solitary creatures, we don't run around in packs like dogs, we preffer to hunt alone. But he proved his point to Inari that he can be a 9 tail without his help and create his own harem/kingdom with his own power. He proved to all of us that it was okay to be a wild Kitsune and that there are more than one way to greater power.

"But I did not agree with the way he treated the females, he used them to create his dream. There are always more females than there are males foxes and most males are effeminate and with their beauty you'd say there aren't any male foxes at all. But my father, me and some of the others have been blessed with an 'unrefined roughness' that basically passes for masculinity." He winked at me "That quality is absolutely necessary for surviving the Makai where our hope for survival lay.

"You see we have always peacefully co-existed with humans, sure we trick them and have a little harmless fun, but we also make sure of their happiness. Inari's kitsunes, bless fields to make them more fertile, and bless little children to make them clever and keep them healthy and happy, children are sacred to us you know, I could never harm or play dirty tricks on little kids even when I was a kid myself. In return the humans give us sweet sticky rice cakes, and burn incense in little roadway shrines and their prayers give us the power to help them out. They gave us, spirit foxes, a way to exist.

"But Otosama saw the end of that era, he must have seen ahead in time perhaps a thousand years ago? Who knows, he just suddently decided he wanted to be cast out of heaven then he wreck havoc in the human world so he can be cast futher down into the demon world so he can establish a haven for our kind, so we would not have to die an inglorious death in the hands of faithless humans.

"And what a haven it was! Demons feared the Kitsune highlands because no one ever comes back out of it. It was safe, beautiful, rich, with white marble temples, pagodas, and sprawling pools of warm water for bathing, fountains, flower gardens thick with every color of the rainbow... it was so unlike the rest of the Makai, you might say its a piece of heaven re-created in the demon world, and it was the females who created that haven.

"He gathered what females he could find and either charmed them or forced them into living with him in his territory. He kept the females like he would keep items, you know, no freedom, no rights, ultra traditional you might say, only a few of the older females knew how to fight. It is a man's job to protect his females that's true, but I believed it wouldn't hurt to acknowledge the strength of your women. I believed in our females, they were so much more than baby makers and house keepers. They are just as clever, skilled, and... they hide their strengths by creating beauty, by making themselves soft and vulnerable they hide that razor sharp wit that thinks 4 or 5 steps ahead...

"Anyway, father did understand that such a soft and kind place created by mothers would not make the strong wild kitsunes that will survive the Makai, so he kicked out every male kitsune that acquired his second tail and forced them to survive outside his kingdom, allowing them access only during the spring festivals. Hm, and being kitsunes we've always found a way to cirumvent the measures he'd created to keep us away. We come and go as we please, he knows, but I guess it's his way of enhancing our skills." He looked at me with a bored sigh. "You brought this upon yourself, you got me started on the good ole days. I can go on forever unless you interrupt me."

I nuzzled his cheek "So, who did you take after?" I asked.

He smiled for me then shrugged "They say I looked like my father but really I'm just a pale imitation." He sighed against my neck "I hate to admit it, but my father is so handsome even I like looking at him. He has this certain glow that makes him absolutely irrisistable when he wants to be beautiful and the holy kind of terrible when he's angry or serious. It was no wonder that even the males flocked to him. He's very charismatic, extremely cunning, farsighted and..." he shrugged "very good at getting what he wants."

I can see admiration in his eyes and a sad wistful smile while he talked about his father. Kurama did love a long time ago "You sound like you admire him, then why do you say you hate him?"

He frowned "Because he failed to protect my mother. We were attacked by Youko hunters the dawn after the culmination of our spring festival," he shook his head "he's too powerful to be defeated just like that... he must be planning something, that son of a bitch, and for that plan he led his wives to the main den to be massacred instead of up a mountain where he could have summoned the powers of heaven easier to defend them." He pushed himself up away from me and rubbed one hand over his forhead.

"I'm sure protecting the almost always pregnant females is a heavy task but he could have done it, if anyone could pull it off he can, I mean it was just 1 S-class demon and his cohorts. How hard could that be? He didn't live up to my expectations! He was better than that! What the fuck was he thinking leading them to- oh..." he went pale as he realized something, he sat on his heels surprised at whatever revealation he found then his eyes blazed with fury.

"Son of a...! I've been manipulated!" just as suddently, his eyes went blank, then his hands went up to his head "No, don't you dare! Go away!!!" he growled and his entire body became tense. He looked at me with pure panic in his eyes "Hiei! Yomi knew! My father he's-" a deep growl cut the rest of his words off.

I sat up alarmed, a power struggle had started, I watched Kurama with empty eyes fighting with himself, his hands became claws as they dug into his scalp. I tore my ward off, I did not know what I was doing but I needed to do something. I tried to look into his mind and found a ball of blinding white youki, I couldn't see pass it, I couldn't hear his thoughts.

"Kurama!" I shouted and tried to pull his hands off his head, trails of blood made it's way down his face as he scratched his scalp "Kurama! Stop it!" I pulled his hands off by force and when he looked at me he wasn't the Youko.

"You." I breathed, he pulled his wrists away from me and wiped the blood that had flowed down to his cheek. Those cold wary eyes, that attitude... the Silent one has taken over.

Then I remmebered what he did to me.

"By the way." I turned him slightly towards me and punched him hard across the face.The force of my blow sent him sprawling off the bed, he looked up at me surprised, then gingerly, he touched the cut on his lip "That's for fucking me without my cooperation!" I yelled at him.

I hopped off the bed, raised my fist and punched him again, he didn't flinch, he didn't even try to block my blow, his head turned sharply and his hair became a mess on his shoulders, across his body and on the floor. "And that's because I felt like it!" I said gasping for breath.

Shimatta! Why did I do that?

I knelt next to him and he flung his hair back over his shoulders, with a careless flick of a wrist.

I cut his lip, his cheek... k'ssoo that's going to bruise!

The anger that fueled me evaporated, I shivered uncontrollably from the chill air on my naked skin and the marginal amount of youki I had left. I made to touch his lip but he slapped my hand away and gave me a bored look asking me if I was done with my childish temper tantrum.

That pissed me off but I was getting too dizzy to do anything more than hold on to the floor.

He smirked at me, stood up, ran his thumb over his bleeding lip then licked the blood off it.

"What happened? Why did he... did he remember something? What did he figure out?" I asked in a low tone as I stood up bracing myself against the bed, forcing my knees to lock, when I tried to hold on to him for balance he avoided me.

The Silent one ignored my questions, he still doesn't want to touch me, he simply raised a brow and left me to go to the bathroom. "Bastard! I'm still talking to you!" I went after him, I caught his wrist but he flung me with such force towards the bed I bounced off it's side and landed on all fours at his feet.

It hurt my already aching back, I focused on the carpeted floor for a few breaths trying to clear the nausea my sudden movements induced and looked up. His eyes were chips of cold hatred as they glared down at me. They seem even colder than the eyes that looked at me while he dismembered that human in Hong Kong. It drained whatever 'fight' I had left in me "Do you hate me that much?" I asked and I barely heard myself speak.

His expression didn't change, he turned, left for the bathroom and locked the door behind him.

That...

I sat on my heels and though the inside of my chest felt like it's being cut to pieces with a string, I felt numb everywhere else.

Youko Kurama remembered and he was suppressed...

I stared at the bathroom door, if I force him I would not accomplish much in my weakened state. He... does he really hate me? I had stopped shivering but my limbs were so cold I couldn't feel my feet and hands.

I forced myself to stand up, crawled back into bed and covered myself with the blankets. I can't do anything right now, I can't confront him when my insides are being shredded by that look in my Kurama's eyes.

K'so! I punched him twice!

I ended up doing what I used to do when I'm in pain, or hungry, or lonely and can't do anything about it. I curled up tight, closed my eyes and willed myself to sleep chanting, it's alright, it will be alright, don't worry everything will be alright...