Yu Yu Hakusho Fan Fiction ❯ Enma's Torment Theatre ❯ Waiting for Halfblood Prince ( Chapter 21 )
[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]
By: Chrissy Sky 
Hiei and Kurama's 1-Year Anniversary, Harry Potter jokes, and the long-awaited Yuusuke/Koenma lemon. Yes, it's a real one. I swear.
Anime/Manga: Yu Yu Hakusho Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Romance / Hentai / Comedy | Type: Continuation | Uploaded On: 12.01.2004 | Updated On: 07.15.2005 | Pages: 9 | Words: 6.6K | Visits: 2.0K | Status: Completed
Hiei and Kurama's 1-Year Anniversary, Harry Potter jokes, and the long-awaited Yuusuke/Koenma lemon. Yes, it's a real one. I swear.
Anime/Manga: Yu Yu Hakusho Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Romance / Hentai / Comedy | Type: Continuation | Uploaded On: 12.01.2004 | Updated On: 07.15.2005 | Pages: 9 | Words: 6.6K | Visits: 2.0K | Status: Completed
Enma’s Torment Theatre
Episode Twenty-One: Waiting for Halfblood Prince
Story: Sensui’s First Love
Story by: hieis_only_007
Msted by: Chrissy Sky, with help from Rose Thorne and Yhaun.
Notes: I emailed the author, and got no response. Receiving no notification right away, I waited two weeks, as is my standard. In that time, I still was not contacted. If I was ignored on purpose, then I feel absolutely no guilt whatsoever in going on with this. However, if the email just was not received, the author (hieis_only_007) can still contact me and tell me to remove this mst, at which point I will take steps to replace it with another, by a different author who is waiting patiently for his fic to be msted.
My request was NOT a flame, and was written competently and politely. I do NOT enjoy being ignored.
Also, I msted this because Armand (SirPsychoSexy) asked me to, so it’s definitely for him. ^_^
-
-September 26th, Ningenkai-
Laying comfortably on the couch, blankets nearly cocooning him and his lover, Kurama reached over to the nightstand for a sip of water before continuing. In school, he remembered very well being asked to read aloud quite frequently by his teachers, since he was a fluent speaker and reader. But it wasn’t nearly as enjoyable as it was now, reading to the content fire demon in his arms.
Today had been planned out in advance. It was nothing spectacular; in fact it was downright lazy. But that appealed to them both. After the mission with the Shikonki, the Reikai Tantei had been dispatched on two other missions with slightly longer outcomes. Not to mention that Hiei had had to return to the Makai for a few weeks to take care of some duties with Mukuro. Now he was back, Kurama still had free time before the next term of college began, and the only thing either them wanted to do was sit around all day doing nothing. That evening they would have a wonderful dinner, and afterwards they’d head upstairs for some additional intimate cuddling.
His diminutive black-clad ‘husband’ lay close against his side, his eyes closed drowsily though Kurama had no doubt that he was paying careful attention to his voice.
Hiei had listened to the two first books without complaint, but when it came around to the third one, the youkai actually seemed to be really enjoying it. Kurama himself proclaimed Prisoner of Azkaban to be his favorite out of the five (while Yuusuke’s was Order of the Phoenix, ironically). The first two, though, Kurama had the feeling they were a little too predictable at times for his intelligent mate. From the start of the Philosopher’s Stone, Hiei had guessed that Snape was a red herring of sorts, and the same for Hagrid in Chamber of Secrets. The way Harry was treated by Vernon and Petunia did seem to strike a cord in the fire demon, but whether it was because of his own childhood or the fact that they planned on having their own children someday Kurama didn’t know.
Now, Kurama was reading the best part. Glancing from time to time at Hiei, he knew the Jaganshi’s attention was rapt.
“‘KEEP QUIET, YOU STUPID GIRL!’ Snape shouted, looking quite deranged. ‘DON’T TALK ABOUT THINGS YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND!’ A few sparks shot out of the end of his wand, which was still pointed at Black’s face…” Hiei was giggling softly, as he did every time Kurama read the bold parts, because the fox was quite nearly shouting himself, and did it with such emotion. Kurama blushed slightly and bent to kiss his forehead.
“It’s a shame they cut out all of Snape’s good lines in the movie,” Kurama remarked. “All the shouting, ranting, and spitting.”
Hiei made a face. “Damn movies.” Between Kurama’s remarks and Yuusuke’s own ranting, he wasn’t looking forward to watching it.
There was a timid knock on the door. Kurama sighed distractedly and detangled himself from Hiei, placing a bookmark to keep their place in the book. “Hiei, could you check on dinner?” he asked as he approached the door.
Hiei grunted and, with a sigh of his own as he abandoned their warm nest, went into the kitchen. Checking the pot he saw the water was starting to boil, so he went ahead and dumped in the rice. When he was finished with that, he heard a bubbly feminine voice from the living room and his mood immediately darkened. He reached up and turned off the burner.
“What’s she doing here?” he grumbled to himself, heading out to see what was going on. Kurama was frowning heavily at an embarrassed looking Botan.
“Do you have any idea what today is?” the Youko was demanding, irritated by something. Hiei had a good idea what. “It’s our one-year anniversary!!”
Botan grinned. “Oh, that’s wonderful! Congratulations!”
“Botan,” Kurama said carefully. His voice sounded oddly dangerous and she backed up a few steps nervously. “I will only say this once. GET OUT!”
Hiei’s own eyes widened at the order, while Botan yelped.
“But,” she stammered, “the mission -- you need to go to the theatre--”
“I don’t care,” Kurama told her, unflinching. “You’ll have to do without us today. Can’t Enma just reschedule?”
“N-no… He said it had to be today, that he’s very busy tomorrow--”
“Kurama,” Hiei tried to interject.
“There’s no possible way we’re doing it today,” the redhead said stubbornly.
“But you can’t just turn Enma-sama down!” Botan cried.
“Imp,” Hiei attempted again, a little louder.
“Think of Hiei’s parole!”
“Technically he’s not even on it anymore,” Kurama said.
“FOX!” Hiei shouted, feeling more than a little irritated himself. Startled green eyes turned on him. “Kurama, it’s alright. If we go now, we can still get back and have the evening free.”
Botan nodded eagerly. “The fic isn’t long at all; I had a look at it!”
Kurama sighed. Hiei had a point, and the Jaganshi had obviously made his decision because he was putting his cloak on. He reached over to the coat rack and got his jacket. “What kind of fic is it?”
“A Mary Sue, Koenma-sama called it.”
“Oh.” Kurama exchanged a knowing look with Hiei. “Great.”
-Reikai, Theatre-
[sitting from left to right on the couch: Kuwabara, Koenma, Yuusuke, Hiei, and Kurama]
Kurama: Here we go again.
Yuusuke: You will NOT believe some of the absurd rumors I’ve heard about the new HP book.
Hiei: I’m almost afraid to know.
Yuusuke: Um. How far into the books are you?
Hiei: We’re almost finished with Prisoner of Azkaban.
Kurama: [grumbles something about wanting to take his time getting to Goblet of Fire and not wanting to be there because of their anniversary]
Yuusuke: Well, there’s the one about Dumbledore being Ron from the future.
Koenma: What!?
Yuusuke: Yeah, I know.
Kurama: I’m not even going to go into the reasons why that’s not possible.
Yuusuke: Yeah. If people had just paid a little more attention to the books, they wouldn’t even think that. But, boy do they have reasons! Whole lists of them.
Hiei: You fan-people really have no lives.
Yuusuke: [sweat drops]
Kuwa: What fic are we reading again?
Koenma: A Mary Sue.
Kuwa: Ew. Not another one.
Kurama: Gee, I wonder who they’re after now…
Kuwa: Damn Funi.
Yuusuke: Well, it’s not really Funi’s fault. [everyone gives him an odd stare] Well, to an extent. The version on TV is even worse than the unedited dub. So, really, Cartoon Network should be to blame.
Kurama: Let’s not get started on the stupid dub. We’ll be going on for hours, and I want to get out of here as soon as possible.
>Disclaimer: I don't own Yuyu Hakusho
Yuusuke: Good thing, too, since she can’t type it correctly.
Koenma: What other rumors are there?
Hiei: And must we hear them?
Yuusuke: [cheerfully] Yes, to both questions! My other *favorite* one is “Snape is really Harry’s father.”
Kurama: [chuckles darkly] I feel a disturbance in the Force, as if millions of Snarry fans cried out in terror, and were suddenly silenced.
Hiei: [stifles a laugh] But, that can’t be possible. Harry *looks* like James, he’s practically a doppelganger. They make a big point about that.
Yuusuke: [blinks] You *have* been paying attention…
Hiei: [rolls his eyes]
Koenma: Well, it’s obviously not going to happen.
Yuusuke: I *do* think that Rowling will reveal even more about Severus’ past, but it definitely won’t be THAT.
>although I wish I did.
Yuusuke: I wish I owned myself.
Hiei: You do. Moron.
Yuusuke: [raspberries]
Koenma: [puts an arm around him] He does have a point.
Yuusuke: Well, I suppose. It’s not like we have “Property of Togashi” stamped on our asses.
Kuwa: We don’t?
Yuusuke: [snorts]
>Chapter One
Yuusuke: The Fangirl Menace.
Kurama: Speaking of the devil incarnate, heard anything new about Episode III?
Yuusuke: Hmm… Yoda’s still CGI, Palpatine has a lightsaber… Chewie’s in it! I’m positive I saw him in the teaser trailer.
Kurama: Right on.
Kuwa: I thought we were talking about Harry Potter? Stop switching fandoms like that.
Yuusuke: Fine, fine. Want to hear another rumor? I got loads of them.
Hiei: [sarcastically] Wonderful. Do share with us your infinite knowledge, O Wise Fanboy.
Yuusuke: [simpers] Thank you, Hiei, I will.
Hiei: Che’.
Yuusuke: Well, since Rowling announced that she’s going to off another character, there’s a lot of speculation on who it might be. Mostly around Dumbledore and Harry. I had guessed Ron, but then I heard something about Rowling confirming that Ron and Hermione were not going to die.
Kuwa: So Harry dies? Good.
Yuusuke: Well, then that leads me to the rumor about Harry already being dead.
Kuwa: … You mean he’s a zombie?!
Yuusuke: Yup. Hermione’s going to be fucking a zombie.
Kuwa: [falls over laughing]
>Shinobu Sensui,
Yuusuke: [screams]
Koenma: [startled] Yuu-chan?!
Yuusuke: Er, sorry. Flashbacks.
Hiei: Right…
Kurama: [mumbles] It’s not like you hadn’t died before…
Koenma: [glares] I thought we decided we wouldn’t talk about that.
Kurama: We weren’t talking about it.
Koenma: No, you were mumbling.
Kurama: [smiles sheepishly]
Hiei: Leave him alone. If he wants to mumble something, let him.
Koenma: Whatever.
>detective of the spirit world,
Yuusuke: And everyone’s favorite misogynist!
Kuwa: Not *mine*.
>and his partner, Itsuki,
Yuusuke: --had wild monkey sex.
Kurama: Yes. Because they’re the *canon* gay couple.
Yuusuke: Do I sense a hint of jealousy, my friend?
Kurama: Humph.
Hiei: [runs hand through his hair] Don’t worry about it, Imp.
Kurama: [smiles, leans into his touch] I know.
>raced to the lair of the Black Black Cub
Yuusuke: That poor baby bear. He has no idea what’s gonna happen to him, with those two…
Kurama: CLUB. With an L.
Hiei: What’s the title of the new book?
Yuusuke: Harry Potter and the Halfblood Prince.
Hiei: [blinks] Who’s the Halfblood Prince?
Yuusuke: Good question. Most people think it’s Dumbledore, Harry, or Hagrid.
Hiei: Che. Not more of your damn rumors.
Yuusuke: [smirks] You asked.
Hiei: Shut up.
>to block up the tunnel to the demon world.
Yuusuke: Heaven forbid that they’d go out of their way to create one.
Koenma: Yuu-chan.
Yuusuke: [kisses his cheek] Just a riff, K-chan.
Koenma: [pulls him closer] It’s just not something I want to talk about.
Yuusuke: Well, if it’s about Sensui, it’s kinda hard NOT to… Wait. The Sue is after Sensui?
Hiei: [gives him a withering look] That’s pathetically obvious.
Yuusuke: But, I mean. He’s gay. He’s *really* gay. In the show, I mean.
Kurama: Yes, dear. [pulls Hiei into his lap and nibbles on his neck]
Hiei: [smirks, whispers] Can’t wait until tonight?
Kurama: [grins] I can’t resist you, Dragon. You tempt me at every turn.
Hiei: [shifts]
Kurama: [gasps] Hiei!
Kuwa: There they go again…
Yuusuke: [snickers] Say it like Threepio!
Kuwa: Er. No.
Hiei: [panting] Stupid Fanboy…
Yuusuke: [glares]
>The few demons they had to fight were no more than D class so they were easily defeated.
Yuusuke: In the name of the moon, they’ll punish all humans and Mary Sues!
Koenma: You never know. The Sues might *enjoy* that.
Yuusuke and Kuwa: Ick.
>“Alright, Itsuki, we’ll take them by surprise.
Yuusuke: [Sensui] Take your clothes off and cover yourself in chocolate sauce.
Kurama: [stops what he’s doing to Hiei abruptly] What?!
Yuusuke: Well, that would’ve surprised *me*…
Hiei: Idiot.
Yuusuke: [raspberries]
Kuwa: That was just random, Yuusuke.
Koenma: There’s nothing wrong with random.
Yuusuke: Yeah!
Kurama: [nuzzles Hiei’s neck] He just had to go and ruin the mood, too…
Hiei: [smiles, kisses him] Don’t worry. We still have tonight.
Yuusuke: Tonight?
Kurama: Er. It’s our anniversary tonight. [exchanges a nervous look with Hiei]
Yuusuke: Oh! Why didn’t you say anything?! We could’ve gotten out of Msting! Hell, we could’ve had a party.
Kurama: Actually… we’d decided we just wanted to spend a quiet evening at home.
Hiei: Which is why we didn’t tell you.
Yuusuke: Oh… That’s mean.
Kurama: [sheepish] Sorry.
Yuusuke: S’alright. But we still could’ve gotten out of msting.
Koenma: So you should have said something.
Kurama: [sighs]
>On three.” Shinobu whispered to his comrade.
Yuusuke: In his ear.
Kurama: Yes, yes. Gayer than a sack full of monkeys. Just move on.
Yuusuke: Actually, if we’re going to quote Good Omens, Kurama, *you* remind me of Aziraphale the most.
Kurama: Oh, *do* shut up.
Yuusuke: See? SEE?
Kurama: [sighs]
>Itsuki merely nodded.
Kurama: Because poor Itsuki’s soul had been raped by the Mary Sue, leaving in its place a shriveled, pathetic version of his former self, unable to speak.
Hiei: A clone, you mean?
Kurama: Yes, exactly.
>“One....... two......” he whispered.
>“THREE!!!!!” they shouted together as they burst open the doors. Shinobu froze.
Yuusuke: Because standing on the other side of the door was none other than Subzero.
>The scene before him was not what he expected.
Yuusuke: Instead, the tape of his favorite movie got switched with Prisoner of Azkaban.
Kurama: Still on HP?
Yuusuke: [shrugs] Well, I thought it’d be kinder than making him watch It’s a Wonderful Life.
>He was expecting a bunch of rich fat guys sitting around drinking whine or something.
Koenma: Or maybe WINE?
Yuusuke: “My fandom’s been whining longer than your fandom has existed!”
>He never expected to see his own kind torturing demons for pure enjoyment.
Yuusuke: He expected the enjoyment to be tainted instead.
>The one they were currently “playing with” was a young female fox demon,
Kuwa: [sings] Here she comes, Miss America…
Yuusuke: “You WILL have long blonde hair, big green eyes, nice full breasts that stand up and say hello, ass that won't quit, and legs that go ALL the way up!”
Kurama: She just *had* to be a youko too. [sighs] I’m embarrassed for my race.
Koenma: Got to give the author credit for that, though. It could’ve been a human. But he still wouldn’t have any interest whatsoever with a woman.
Hiei: I like that she’s in *pain*. Makes me feel better.
Kurama: Sadist.
Hiei: [smirks] But you love me anyway.
Kurama: [kisses his cheek] Of course.
>who looked no younger than him. ( A/N In human years)
Yuusuke: That doesn’t mean anything. Hiei looks *younger* than us, and he’s a really *old* guy.
Hiei: [glares] I am not.
Kurama: In the Makai, he would be considered barely above the juvenile age.
Yuusuke: So… You’re a borderline paedophile!
Kurama: [glares] Well, while we’re on the subject of paedophilia, why don’t we talk about you and Koenma.
Yuusuke: Er. Never mind.
Kurama: Thought so.
>She screamed as the whip lashed back across her back,
Yuusuke: Oh, you know she really enjoyed it. Deep down.
>ripping through the fabric of her silver shirt and soft tanned skin.
Yuusuke: Kurama, she stole your wardrobe too!
Kurama: [eye twitches]
Hiei: His skin’s not tanned though. Youko is actually *paler*. [kisses Kurama] Of course, no stupid Mary Sue can compare to the real thing.
Kurama: [smiles]
Koenma: Lay off the author riffs.
Kuwa: Why?
>She made an attempt to grab the whip but the wielder pulled it away.
Yuusuke: Sues aren’t normally weak unless they’re trying to gain sympathy. “Oh, poor me, hold me, love me--change your sexuality!”
>The older men in the room (the members of the Black Black Club) all laughed at how pathetic the little demon looked.
Yuusuke: And threw rocks at her.
Hiei: And put her in an Iron Maiden.
Yuusuke: Ooo. Good one.
Hiei: [smirks]
>The demon girl just glared at them with icy blue eyes,
Yuusuke: What flavor were they?
Kurama: Ew.
Kuwa: Blueberry!
Yuusuke: I don’t like blueberry. Send her back.
Koenma: You won’t get any arguments from us.
Kurama: [murmuring] Icy meaning cold, not icy meaning icee.
>blood dripping out of her silver hair,
Kurama: As opposed to dripping out of her HEAD.
Kuwa: Hair can bleed? Isn’t hair dead and made of the same stuff as your nails? Dead stuff can bleed?
Yuusuke: You obviously haven’t seen one of George Romero’s zombie movies.
Hiei: Hn. It was only a little blood.
Koenma: And didn’t they hit her *back*, not her head?
>which went down to the middle of her back.
Yuusuke: The blood or the hair?
Hiei: The blood. In large quantities.
>Her two silver ears lay flat against her head and her tail hung limply behind her.
Hiei: Because it was broken?
Koenma: Someone’s bloody-minded today.
Hiei: I’m not usually?
Kurama: He doesn’t like Sues especially. And, Botan did interrupt our perfect day.
Botan’s voice: I’m sorry!!
Kurama: [grunts]
Hiei: [kisses him deeply to distract him]
>She attempted to stand but was struck again with the whip causing her to fall back to her knees.
Kuwa: So, um. What other rumors are there?
Hiei: No!
Yuusuke: Well…
Hiei: Damn it.
Kurama: [fondles him to distract him]
Yuusuke: There’s the one about Firenze being Snape’s lover.
Kurama: What?!
Hiei: Who?!
Koenma: [whispers] He’s in Order of the Phoenix.
Kurama: He’s a centaur.
Yuusuke: And you’re a Youko and Hiei’s a fire demon. So what?
Kurama: That’s not the point. He’s just… He’s not Snape’s type.
Yuusuke: Do we *know* Snape’s type?
Kurama: Well… Point taken.
Yuusuke: I’m with you though. Actually, now that Sirius is dead, I’m kinda hoping Snupin is canon. Just don’t tell anyone I said that.
>She panted heavily, blood dripping from the numerous slashes on her back. “Why?”
Kurama: Because the author is trying to gain sympathy from the audience.
>she whispered as she looked at one man in particular.
Koenma: [one in particular] Don’t ask me; I’m the new guy.
>He had a long scar over his left eye and long black hair that laid lazily over his shoulders.
Koenma: Oh. Him.
Yuusuke: What happened to him anyway?
Koenma: Stood there and let the roof fall on him.
Yuusuke: Yeah, he struck me as a real dramatic guy.
>“Why do you torture demons?” she screamed. The man knelt down before her a cupped her chin.
Kurama: And stuck an apple in her mouth.
Yuusuke: [Sakyo] Does that answer your question?
>“Well, demons are useless for bodyguards if they are as soft as you are.
Hiei: [kissing Kurama’s neck] Soft… smooth…
Kurama: [grins]
Yuusuke: [decides not to point out that he sounds a bit like Anakin]
>Besides I'm bored.”
Kuwa: Um.
Yuusuke: Ignore it.
Kurama: Good idea.
>he said smoothly,
Kurama: That period should have been a comma and after smoothly should be a period instead.
Yuusuke: The grammar queen has returned!
Kurama: [gives him a withering look]
>“But you..... might be useful for more than a bodyguard.” as he turned her face and looked over her bloody body.
Yuusuke: Buggered body.
Kurama: I don’t think the author is British, Yuusuke. And, “as” should be capitalized.
Koenma: I did not know Sakyo well, but I knew him well enough to know that’s definitely NOT him.
Kuwa: Who cares?
Koenma: I like to respect the dead.
Hiei: Well, you’re the prince of the dead. Makes sense.
>The girl spat at him in disgust.
Yuusuke: Kinky.
Kurama: Ew. No, it’s not.
>The spit hit the man in the
Kurama: Yuusuke.
Yuusuke: I wasn’t going to say anything!
Kurama: Good.
Koenma: [pats Yuusuke’s shoulder]
>face. He released her chin and nodded to the man with the whip. He struck her again. The girl crumpled in pain. Finally, Shinobu couldn’t take it anymore.
Yuusuke: So he killed everyone in the room. The end.
Hiei: Good.
>He tackled the man with the whip and quickly beat him to a bloody pulp.
Yuusuke: And killed him.
Koenma: She really likes that word. “Bloody.”
Kuwa: Wannabe British.
Kurama: Only if she’s using it in the context of a curse.
>Itsuki helped the girl out of her chains and looked over her wounds.
Hiei: And adding some new ones.
Yuusuke: Right on.
>Neither Shinobu or Itsuki noticed the Black Black Club get away.
Yuusuke: Because they were dead.
>When Shinobu was satisfied with his job on the now dead man
Yuusuke: Well, at least *somebody* is dead.
Hiei: Like you?
Yuusuke: [glares]
>he walked over to where his partner and the girl were.
Yuusuke: --strangling each other over Shinobu.
Kurama: [Itsuki] Back off, Sue! He and all his personalities are MINE!
>The girl backed away a little as he came closer.
Yuusuke: With that funky arm-gun thing. That shit hurt.
Koenma: [cuddles]
>“It’s ok. I won’t hurt you.”
Yuusuke: Much.
>Shinobu said calmly as he crouched down before the girl.
>“Who are you?” she asked carefully.
Kuwa: I am ZIM!
Kurama: I’m Luke Skywalker, I’m here to rescue you.
Yuusuke: Chief!
Koenma: Macloud!
>“I am Shinobu Sensui and this is Itsuki, my partner.” he said as he acknowledged his friend,
Kurama: “Life partner,” Itsuki specified, glaring at the girl ominously.
>“And who would you be?”
Yuusuke: Skank.
Kurama: Elizabeth.
Koenma: Arwen.
Hiei: Amidala.
Kuwa: Relena.
>“My name is Cagally.” she said more comfortable with the human in front of her.
Yuusuke: Who should’ve started losing his mind about now.
Koenma: Yes, because, unless I’m mistaken, this is when Kazuya appeared.
Kurama: Wait… Cagally? Isn’t that the girl in Gundam Seed?
Yuusuke: Heh. Most Mary Sues make up their own names, not steal them from characters that are considered in some quarters as the anti-Sue.
>She attempted to stand but shrank back down to the ground and grabbed her ankle.
Yuusuke: Shrank?
Kuwa: Honey, I Shrunk the Mary Sue!
Hiei: Good. We can squash her and leave.
Kurama: Can we use the lawn mower instead?
>“You shouldn’t try to walk.” Shinobu advised as he touched her shoulder. Cagally looked at him like he was mad.
Yuusuke: Because he IS!
Kurama: Aww, she helped him keep his sanity. It must be true love. [makes mock hacking sounds]
>“Why do you care?” she snarled as she pulled her shoulder out of his warm grasp.
Yuusuke: [Sensui] I don’t; I’m getting paybacks for you raping my personality. Now hold still.
>“Because I’ve learned that all humans are horrible.” he said gravely.
All: …
Koenma: Well that’s a little more like it.
Yuusuke: Yup.
Hiei: It still sucks though.
Yuusuke: Of course.
>“Why does that make demons any different?” she countered.
Hiei: It doesn’t. Humans can be just as bad as demons.
>“Because my partner here is a shadow demon and I can trust him.” Shinobu said.
Yuusuke: [Shinobu] With my life… my body…
>‘I suppose I can trust this human. his spirit is pure from what I can sense.’ Cagally thought,
Koenma: No. Just the Shinobu personality.
Hiei: No kidding. She definitely fits the "dumb Sue" archetype.
>‘ And he is kind of cute.’
Yuusuke: For an insane misogynist bastard who would in reality sooner kill you as soon as look at you.
>“Would you like me to carry you?” Shinobu asked,
Hiei: While the real Sensui rolled over in his grave.
>breaking Cagally
Kurama: Into tiny, *bloody* pieces.
>from her train of thought. She looked at him, blue clashing with violet.
Yuusuke: In a heroic confrontation. But violet won.
Hiei: At least until blue was resurrected. That’s when everyone found out blue was half-demon.
Yuusuke: Hey! My eyes are brown!
Hiei: [shrugs]
Yuusuke: [pouts] You better not be saying I'm a Gary Stu...
Hiei: Well... You're half-demon, extremely powerful, have come back from the dead on more than one occasion...
Yuusuke: [glares] I am NOT a Gary Stu!
Hiei: [smirks] You said it, not me.
Yuusuke: Jerk.
Hiei: [smirks wider]
Koenma: [glares] Leave him alone.
Kurama: It's not Hiei's fault he can't take a joke.
Yuusuke: [grumbles] Yeah, and I could make some pretty interesting jokes on him if you want.
Kurama: [glares]
Kuwa: Um, guys? You're snapping at each other again for no reason.
Yuusuke: He's right. Let's get this MST over with.
Kurama: Fine.
Hiei: Whatever.
Kuwa: [sighs]
>She nodded and Shinobu carefully picked her up bridal style
Kurama: [sings] It’s a nice day for a white wedding…
Yuusuke: With hopefully the same outcome as in the Wedding Singer.
>and all three of them left the lair of the Black Black Club.
Koenma: And there were flowers and singing, yadda yadda.
Yuusuke: Is that the end?
Koenma: …. I think so.
Yuusuke: Good. So, in summary, the Mary Sue is --
Kurama: Delusional.
Hiei: Can’t accept that Sensui is gay.
Kuwa: Which is just sad.
[everyone exits eagerly, ready to get on with their day]
- Reikai -
Upon entering Koenma’s bedroom, Yuusuke quickly slipped into the lavatory and wiped off his feet with a wet washcloth. Koenma didn’t run around as much as he did, so the godling generally didn’t smell bad, but his own feet odor left much to be desired. Kuwabara’s were worse, though, he’d vouch for that defensibly! When he was finished he walked casually out and to the bed, where his boyfriend was waiting for him.
“Did you want to watch something?” Koenma offered. “You left Slayers here yesterday, and we didn’t finish--”
“No, we can do that later,” Yuusuke cut him off, grinning and sitting in front of him on the bed. “Actually, I just wanted to talk.”
Koenma’s eyes narrowed. Yuusuke had a look on his face. He knew that look. “Talk?”
Yuusuke laughed at his suspiciousness. “Yeah! What, boyfriends can’t talk?”
“Yes,” Koenma answered carefully. “Of course we can, Yuu-chan. If that’s what you *really* want to do.”
Yuusuke nonchalantly moved from his cross-legged position, spreading his legs and leaned backward. “*Yes* that’s what I want.”
Momentarily distracted by the lean body on show before him, Koenma didn’t think of anything to say right away. He blushed. “So. What did you want to talk about?”
Similarly distracted by Koenma’s blush, Yuusuke forgot what they had been talking about. “What?”
Koenma giggled softly. “You wanted to talk about ‘what’?”
Yuusuke laughed. “Yeah, and ‘who’ is on third!”
The godling’s own laughter was cut off as Yuusuke’s feet suddenly landed in his lap. His blush renewed. “Yuu-chan?”
Yuusuke blinked innocently, but not so innocent that the mischievous gleam in his eyes wasn’t obvious. “Hmm?”
“Um. Are you *sure* you wanted to talk?”
The teen rubbed his heels against his lap, edging along his groin. “Well… Okay, I lied.”
“I see that,” Koenma laughed breathily, gazing at the teen, still surprised by his directness. He had massaged Yuusuke’s feet before, and vice versa, but he had never pressed for more than that, still unsure of how his Tantei would react. So this was a surprise definitely, but a welcome one.
He motioned for Koenma to spread his legs apart to get more room, which the godling complied. His breath got heavier as Yuusuke began to rub his member with astonishing skill through his robes, and watched Koenma. The bright blush on Koenma’s cheek and his eyes glazed over in pleasure added to turn Yuusuke on as well.
Koenma was becoming overrun with sensation, but it wasn’t enough, he wanted to feel the younger man’s skin on him, so he hastily removed his trousers. Yuusuke smirked and rubbed the hardness, enjoying the loud gasping sound Koenma made as he did so. He pumped the length, squeezing it with his toes, and then rubbing it between the arches of his soft, warm feet. Koenma grasped his legs, kneading the skin, watching what was happening on his lap as Yuusuke watched him.
It soon became too much for Koenma, and he pulled one foot up to his mouth, sucking on the teen’s toes passionately. Yuusuke had done a good job working him up it seemed. Yuusuke gasped--Kurama and Hiei had been right about one thing, Koenma was *very* good with his mouth.
Briefly pausing to remove the teenager’s jeans and underwear, those talented lips and tongue worked their way up his waiting foot, working in-between his toes. He sucked on each liberally, one by one, and then took all of them into his mouth hungrily. Then he continued on, licking the sole of his foot, over the skin of his heel and lightly across his calf, then finally up to his thigh. He pushed Yuusuke gently onto his back and moved his legs apart. Koenma looked up and saw Yuusuke leaning up by his elbows, studying his every move.
Koenma grinned, pleased--he could tell Yuusuke was enjoying this very much, which made him happy. He bent his head and took the teen’s erection into his mouth.
Yuusuke cried out and nearly flew off the bed, but Koenma had been waiting for him to do that, and had a good hold on his hips, keeping the younger man from choking him. That mouth stroked him expertly, and Yuusuke’s hands flew to his hair, moving the soft brown tresses away from his face to see him better.
The Junior god enthusiastically licked up the younger man’s shaft, drawing out the strokes teasingly, then running his tongue eagerly over the head and slit before taking the erection fully in his mouth. While Yuusuke’s hands were still in his hair, stroking his skull, Koenma’s own were caressing over the teen’s lean, muscled frame. He ran one hand over his stomach and chest, playfully rubbing and pinching his nipples, until Yuusuke took the hand and pulled it into his mouth, sucking on his fingertips. Koenma’s other hand wandered along his back, stroking his spine and lower back.
Sucking on the fingers generously, Yuusuke stroked them in and out of his mouth, almost mimicking the motions Koenma made on his erection. His overactive imagination supplied an image of something other than fingers in his mouth, and reluctantly he pulled Koenma’s head up. He moaned when he did, and Koenma looked up at him, confused.
“Yuu-chan?”
Yuusuke smiled, feeling a little lightheaded from it all. “I’ve got an idea.”
Koenma raised an eyebrow and smiled back. “Should I be worried?”
Yuusuke grinned wider, winking. “Wait and see.” He pulled his top off and Koenma did the same without being asked to. Yuusuke gently prodded Koenma into lying down on his side, and then he moved himself into the same position, only with a twist. Koenma couldn’t help but giggle when his eyes fell on Yuusuke’s length staring him in the face.
“Worried?” Yuusuke joked, running his hands gingerly over the soft skin of the godling’s hips.
“I wouldn’t call it that,” the other replied, and his mouth returned to Yuusuke’s penis without warning.
Yuusuke gasped and nearly kept himself from bucking further into Koenma’s mouth. Dazed but determined to follow through with his plan, since the godling obviously had no objections, he pulled Koenma’s length into his mouth. He had done this to the junior god a few times before and now felt he had the hang of it. He stroked Koenma with his mouth while Koenma did the same to him. This was the most erotic thing they had done, and Yuusuke knew his orgasm was fast approaching. He curled his arm around Koenma’s hips to stroke his backside, and Yuusuke felt something he obviously couldn’t see. Koenma had his legs curled up. The teen reached over and found his feet.
Koenma moaned as his foot was being caressed by those strong, skilled fingers. That combined with the warm and wet mouth bringing him off, it wasn’t long before he came. His lips fell away from Yuusuke so he could cry out passionately, but Yuusuke’s mouth stayed on him, swallowing his cum. As he road out the aftershocks, Yuusuke moved so that he laid diagonally beside Koenma, his arms around him. He kissed the older man gently as he came to himself.
The kisses increased in passion, and Koenma could feel Yuusuke rubbing himself against his thigh. He pushed the teen onto his back, responding to the kiss just as eagerly and rubbed his leg hard against his erection. Yuusuke’s hips moved against his leg, the teen senseless as the pleasure wracked his body. His cries grew louder, pulling his mouth away from Koenma’s so he didn’t end up biting his tongue, and he clutched the godling’s shoulder’s in a tight grip. Koenma sucked on his neck slowly, unrushed since he had already come, only wanting to see to Yuusuke’s needs. He bit the skin hard enough to leave a bruise, and Yuusuke cried out even louder as he climaxed.
Kurama and Hiei had been wrong about one thing--Yuusuke wasn’t the biter, Koenma was.
Soothingly running his hands down Yuusuke’s back, Koenma gazed down at his breathless lover. He was beautiful, even with the scars, which only seemed to enhance the effect. Or maybe that was just because he loved him, Koenma wasn’t sure. He smiled tiredly and kissed the teen’s forehead. Dimly he realized they were lying upside down in the bed. He didn’t worry about that now, contentedly holding the teen close and drowsily closing his eyes.
TBC.
Quote -- Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, Page 360. Copyright J.K. Rowling.
This is the second foot-fetish lemon I’ve written in the past two weeks. XD No Thanksgiving episode, obviously. I’m shooting for a Christmas episode (which I already have a fic for). Anybody want to offer up a lemon for a New Years episode?
Episode Twenty-One: Waiting for Halfblood Prince
Story: Sensui’s First Love
Story by: hieis_only_007
Msted by: Chrissy Sky, with help from Rose Thorne and Yhaun.
Notes: I emailed the author, and got no response. Receiving no notification right away, I waited two weeks, as is my standard. In that time, I still was not contacted. If I was ignored on purpose, then I feel absolutely no guilt whatsoever in going on with this. However, if the email just was not received, the author (hieis_only_007) can still contact me and tell me to remove this mst, at which point I will take steps to replace it with another, by a different author who is waiting patiently for his fic to be msted.
My request was NOT a flame, and was written competently and politely. I do NOT enjoy being ignored.
Also, I msted this because Armand (SirPsychoSexy) asked me to, so it’s definitely for him. ^_^
-
-September 26th, Ningenkai-
Laying comfortably on the couch, blankets nearly cocooning him and his lover, Kurama reached over to the nightstand for a sip of water before continuing. In school, he remembered very well being asked to read aloud quite frequently by his teachers, since he was a fluent speaker and reader. But it wasn’t nearly as enjoyable as it was now, reading to the content fire demon in his arms.
Today had been planned out in advance. It was nothing spectacular; in fact it was downright lazy. But that appealed to them both. After the mission with the Shikonki, the Reikai Tantei had been dispatched on two other missions with slightly longer outcomes. Not to mention that Hiei had had to return to the Makai for a few weeks to take care of some duties with Mukuro. Now he was back, Kurama still had free time before the next term of college began, and the only thing either them wanted to do was sit around all day doing nothing. That evening they would have a wonderful dinner, and afterwards they’d head upstairs for some additional intimate cuddling.
His diminutive black-clad ‘husband’ lay close against his side, his eyes closed drowsily though Kurama had no doubt that he was paying careful attention to his voice.
Hiei had listened to the two first books without complaint, but when it came around to the third one, the youkai actually seemed to be really enjoying it. Kurama himself proclaimed Prisoner of Azkaban to be his favorite out of the five (while Yuusuke’s was Order of the Phoenix, ironically). The first two, though, Kurama had the feeling they were a little too predictable at times for his intelligent mate. From the start of the Philosopher’s Stone, Hiei had guessed that Snape was a red herring of sorts, and the same for Hagrid in Chamber of Secrets. The way Harry was treated by Vernon and Petunia did seem to strike a cord in the fire demon, but whether it was because of his own childhood or the fact that they planned on having their own children someday Kurama didn’t know.
Now, Kurama was reading the best part. Glancing from time to time at Hiei, he knew the Jaganshi’s attention was rapt.
“‘KEEP QUIET, YOU STUPID GIRL!’ Snape shouted, looking quite deranged. ‘DON’T TALK ABOUT THINGS YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND!’ A few sparks shot out of the end of his wand, which was still pointed at Black’s face…” Hiei was giggling softly, as he did every time Kurama read the bold parts, because the fox was quite nearly shouting himself, and did it with such emotion. Kurama blushed slightly and bent to kiss his forehead.
“It’s a shame they cut out all of Snape’s good lines in the movie,” Kurama remarked. “All the shouting, ranting, and spitting.”
Hiei made a face. “Damn movies.” Between Kurama’s remarks and Yuusuke’s own ranting, he wasn’t looking forward to watching it.
There was a timid knock on the door. Kurama sighed distractedly and detangled himself from Hiei, placing a bookmark to keep their place in the book. “Hiei, could you check on dinner?” he asked as he approached the door.
Hiei grunted and, with a sigh of his own as he abandoned their warm nest, went into the kitchen. Checking the pot he saw the water was starting to boil, so he went ahead and dumped in the rice. When he was finished with that, he heard a bubbly feminine voice from the living room and his mood immediately darkened. He reached up and turned off the burner.
“What’s she doing here?” he grumbled to himself, heading out to see what was going on. Kurama was frowning heavily at an embarrassed looking Botan.
“Do you have any idea what today is?” the Youko was demanding, irritated by something. Hiei had a good idea what. “It’s our one-year anniversary!!”
Botan grinned. “Oh, that’s wonderful! Congratulations!”
“Botan,” Kurama said carefully. His voice sounded oddly dangerous and she backed up a few steps nervously. “I will only say this once. GET OUT!”
Hiei’s own eyes widened at the order, while Botan yelped.
“But,” she stammered, “the mission -- you need to go to the theatre--”
“I don’t care,” Kurama told her, unflinching. “You’ll have to do without us today. Can’t Enma just reschedule?”
“N-no… He said it had to be today, that he’s very busy tomorrow--”
“Kurama,” Hiei tried to interject.
“There’s no possible way we’re doing it today,” the redhead said stubbornly.
“But you can’t just turn Enma-sama down!” Botan cried.
“Imp,” Hiei attempted again, a little louder.
“Think of Hiei’s parole!”
“Technically he’s not even on it anymore,” Kurama said.
“FOX!” Hiei shouted, feeling more than a little irritated himself. Startled green eyes turned on him. “Kurama, it’s alright. If we go now, we can still get back and have the evening free.”
Botan nodded eagerly. “The fic isn’t long at all; I had a look at it!”
Kurama sighed. Hiei had a point, and the Jaganshi had obviously made his decision because he was putting his cloak on. He reached over to the coat rack and got his jacket. “What kind of fic is it?”
“A Mary Sue, Koenma-sama called it.”
“Oh.” Kurama exchanged a knowing look with Hiei. “Great.”
-Reikai, Theatre-
[sitting from left to right on the couch: Kuwabara, Koenma, Yuusuke, Hiei, and Kurama]
Kurama: Here we go again.
Yuusuke: You will NOT believe some of the absurd rumors I’ve heard about the new HP book.
Hiei: I’m almost afraid to know.
Yuusuke: Um. How far into the books are you?
Hiei: We’re almost finished with Prisoner of Azkaban.
Kurama: [grumbles something about wanting to take his time getting to Goblet of Fire and not wanting to be there because of their anniversary]
Yuusuke: Well, there’s the one about Dumbledore being Ron from the future.
Koenma: What!?
Yuusuke: Yeah, I know.
Kurama: I’m not even going to go into the reasons why that’s not possible.
Yuusuke: Yeah. If people had just paid a little more attention to the books, they wouldn’t even think that. But, boy do they have reasons! Whole lists of them.
Hiei: You fan-people really have no lives.
Yuusuke: [sweat drops]
Kuwa: What fic are we reading again?
Koenma: A Mary Sue.
Kuwa: Ew. Not another one.
Kurama: Gee, I wonder who they’re after now…
Kuwa: Damn Funi.
Yuusuke: Well, it’s not really Funi’s fault. [everyone gives him an odd stare] Well, to an extent. The version on TV is even worse than the unedited dub. So, really, Cartoon Network should be to blame.
Kurama: Let’s not get started on the stupid dub. We’ll be going on for hours, and I want to get out of here as soon as possible.
>Disclaimer: I don't own Yuyu Hakusho
Yuusuke: Good thing, too, since she can’t type it correctly.
Koenma: What other rumors are there?
Hiei: And must we hear them?
Yuusuke: [cheerfully] Yes, to both questions! My other *favorite* one is “Snape is really Harry’s father.”
Kurama: [chuckles darkly] I feel a disturbance in the Force, as if millions of Snarry fans cried out in terror, and were suddenly silenced.
Hiei: [stifles a laugh] But, that can’t be possible. Harry *looks* like James, he’s practically a doppelganger. They make a big point about that.
Yuusuke: [blinks] You *have* been paying attention…
Hiei: [rolls his eyes]
Koenma: Well, it’s obviously not going to happen.
Yuusuke: I *do* think that Rowling will reveal even more about Severus’ past, but it definitely won’t be THAT.
>although I wish I did.
Yuusuke: I wish I owned myself.
Hiei: You do. Moron.
Yuusuke: [raspberries]
Koenma: [puts an arm around him] He does have a point.
Yuusuke: Well, I suppose. It’s not like we have “Property of Togashi” stamped on our asses.
Kuwa: We don’t?
Yuusuke: [snorts]
>Chapter One
Yuusuke: The Fangirl Menace.
Kurama: Speaking of the devil incarnate, heard anything new about Episode III?
Yuusuke: Hmm… Yoda’s still CGI, Palpatine has a lightsaber… Chewie’s in it! I’m positive I saw him in the teaser trailer.
Kurama: Right on.
Kuwa: I thought we were talking about Harry Potter? Stop switching fandoms like that.
Yuusuke: Fine, fine. Want to hear another rumor? I got loads of them.
Hiei: [sarcastically] Wonderful. Do share with us your infinite knowledge, O Wise Fanboy.
Yuusuke: [simpers] Thank you, Hiei, I will.
Hiei: Che’.
Yuusuke: Well, since Rowling announced that she’s going to off another character, there’s a lot of speculation on who it might be. Mostly around Dumbledore and Harry. I had guessed Ron, but then I heard something about Rowling confirming that Ron and Hermione were not going to die.
Kuwa: So Harry dies? Good.
Yuusuke: Well, then that leads me to the rumor about Harry already being dead.
Kuwa: … You mean he’s a zombie?!
Yuusuke: Yup. Hermione’s going to be fucking a zombie.
Kuwa: [falls over laughing]
>Shinobu Sensui,
Yuusuke: [screams]
Koenma: [startled] Yuu-chan?!
Yuusuke: Er, sorry. Flashbacks.
Hiei: Right…
Kurama: [mumbles] It’s not like you hadn’t died before…
Koenma: [glares] I thought we decided we wouldn’t talk about that.
Kurama: We weren’t talking about it.
Koenma: No, you were mumbling.
Kurama: [smiles sheepishly]
Hiei: Leave him alone. If he wants to mumble something, let him.
Koenma: Whatever.
>detective of the spirit world,
Yuusuke: And everyone’s favorite misogynist!
Kuwa: Not *mine*.
>and his partner, Itsuki,
Yuusuke: --had wild monkey sex.
Kurama: Yes. Because they’re the *canon* gay couple.
Yuusuke: Do I sense a hint of jealousy, my friend?
Kurama: Humph.
Hiei: [runs hand through his hair] Don’t worry about it, Imp.
Kurama: [smiles, leans into his touch] I know.
>raced to the lair of the Black Black Cub
Yuusuke: That poor baby bear. He has no idea what’s gonna happen to him, with those two…
Kurama: CLUB. With an L.
Hiei: What’s the title of the new book?
Yuusuke: Harry Potter and the Halfblood Prince.
Hiei: [blinks] Who’s the Halfblood Prince?
Yuusuke: Good question. Most people think it’s Dumbledore, Harry, or Hagrid.
Hiei: Che. Not more of your damn rumors.
Yuusuke: [smirks] You asked.
Hiei: Shut up.
>to block up the tunnel to the demon world.
Yuusuke: Heaven forbid that they’d go out of their way to create one.
Koenma: Yuu-chan.
Yuusuke: [kisses his cheek] Just a riff, K-chan.
Koenma: [pulls him closer] It’s just not something I want to talk about.
Yuusuke: Well, if it’s about Sensui, it’s kinda hard NOT to… Wait. The Sue is after Sensui?
Hiei: [gives him a withering look] That’s pathetically obvious.
Yuusuke: But, I mean. He’s gay. He’s *really* gay. In the show, I mean.
Kurama: Yes, dear. [pulls Hiei into his lap and nibbles on his neck]
Hiei: [smirks, whispers] Can’t wait until tonight?
Kurama: [grins] I can’t resist you, Dragon. You tempt me at every turn.
Hiei: [shifts]
Kurama: [gasps] Hiei!
Kuwa: There they go again…
Yuusuke: [snickers] Say it like Threepio!
Kuwa: Er. No.
Hiei: [panting] Stupid Fanboy…
Yuusuke: [glares]
>The few demons they had to fight were no more than D class so they were easily defeated.
Yuusuke: In the name of the moon, they’ll punish all humans and Mary Sues!
Koenma: You never know. The Sues might *enjoy* that.
Yuusuke and Kuwa: Ick.
>“Alright, Itsuki, we’ll take them by surprise.
Yuusuke: [Sensui] Take your clothes off and cover yourself in chocolate sauce.
Kurama: [stops what he’s doing to Hiei abruptly] What?!
Yuusuke: Well, that would’ve surprised *me*…
Hiei: Idiot.
Yuusuke: [raspberries]
Kuwa: That was just random, Yuusuke.
Koenma: There’s nothing wrong with random.
Yuusuke: Yeah!
Kurama: [nuzzles Hiei’s neck] He just had to go and ruin the mood, too…
Hiei: [smiles, kisses him] Don’t worry. We still have tonight.
Yuusuke: Tonight?
Kurama: Er. It’s our anniversary tonight. [exchanges a nervous look with Hiei]
Yuusuke: Oh! Why didn’t you say anything?! We could’ve gotten out of Msting! Hell, we could’ve had a party.
Kurama: Actually… we’d decided we just wanted to spend a quiet evening at home.
Hiei: Which is why we didn’t tell you.
Yuusuke: Oh… That’s mean.
Kurama: [sheepish] Sorry.
Yuusuke: S’alright. But we still could’ve gotten out of msting.
Koenma: So you should have said something.
Kurama: [sighs]
>On three.” Shinobu whispered to his comrade.
Yuusuke: In his ear.
Kurama: Yes, yes. Gayer than a sack full of monkeys. Just move on.
Yuusuke: Actually, if we’re going to quote Good Omens, Kurama, *you* remind me of Aziraphale the most.
Kurama: Oh, *do* shut up.
Yuusuke: See? SEE?
Kurama: [sighs]
>Itsuki merely nodded.
Kurama: Because poor Itsuki’s soul had been raped by the Mary Sue, leaving in its place a shriveled, pathetic version of his former self, unable to speak.
Hiei: A clone, you mean?
Kurama: Yes, exactly.
>“One....... two......” he whispered.
>“THREE!!!!!” they shouted together as they burst open the doors. Shinobu froze.
Yuusuke: Because standing on the other side of the door was none other than Subzero.
>The scene before him was not what he expected.
Yuusuke: Instead, the tape of his favorite movie got switched with Prisoner of Azkaban.
Kurama: Still on HP?
Yuusuke: [shrugs] Well, I thought it’d be kinder than making him watch It’s a Wonderful Life.
>He was expecting a bunch of rich fat guys sitting around drinking whine or something.
Koenma: Or maybe WINE?
Yuusuke: “My fandom’s been whining longer than your fandom has existed!”
>He never expected to see his own kind torturing demons for pure enjoyment.
Yuusuke: He expected the enjoyment to be tainted instead.
>The one they were currently “playing with” was a young female fox demon,
Kuwa: [sings] Here she comes, Miss America…
Yuusuke: “You WILL have long blonde hair, big green eyes, nice full breasts that stand up and say hello, ass that won't quit, and legs that go ALL the way up!”
Kurama: She just *had* to be a youko too. [sighs] I’m embarrassed for my race.
Koenma: Got to give the author credit for that, though. It could’ve been a human. But he still wouldn’t have any interest whatsoever with a woman.
Hiei: I like that she’s in *pain*. Makes me feel better.
Kurama: Sadist.
Hiei: [smirks] But you love me anyway.
Kurama: [kisses his cheek] Of course.
>who looked no younger than him. ( A/N In human years)
Yuusuke: That doesn’t mean anything. Hiei looks *younger* than us, and he’s a really *old* guy.
Hiei: [glares] I am not.
Kurama: In the Makai, he would be considered barely above the juvenile age.
Yuusuke: So… You’re a borderline paedophile!
Kurama: [glares] Well, while we’re on the subject of paedophilia, why don’t we talk about you and Koenma.
Yuusuke: Er. Never mind.
Kurama: Thought so.
>She screamed as the whip lashed back across her back,
Yuusuke: Oh, you know she really enjoyed it. Deep down.
>ripping through the fabric of her silver shirt and soft tanned skin.
Yuusuke: Kurama, she stole your wardrobe too!
Kurama: [eye twitches]
Hiei: His skin’s not tanned though. Youko is actually *paler*. [kisses Kurama] Of course, no stupid Mary Sue can compare to the real thing.
Kurama: [smiles]
Koenma: Lay off the author riffs.
Kuwa: Why?
>She made an attempt to grab the whip but the wielder pulled it away.
Yuusuke: Sues aren’t normally weak unless they’re trying to gain sympathy. “Oh, poor me, hold me, love me--change your sexuality!”
>The older men in the room (the members of the Black Black Club) all laughed at how pathetic the little demon looked.
Yuusuke: And threw rocks at her.
Hiei: And put her in an Iron Maiden.
Yuusuke: Ooo. Good one.
Hiei: [smirks]
>The demon girl just glared at them with icy blue eyes,
Yuusuke: What flavor were they?
Kurama: Ew.
Kuwa: Blueberry!
Yuusuke: I don’t like blueberry. Send her back.
Koenma: You won’t get any arguments from us.
Kurama: [murmuring] Icy meaning cold, not icy meaning icee.
>blood dripping out of her silver hair,
Kurama: As opposed to dripping out of her HEAD.
Kuwa: Hair can bleed? Isn’t hair dead and made of the same stuff as your nails? Dead stuff can bleed?
Yuusuke: You obviously haven’t seen one of George Romero’s zombie movies.
Hiei: Hn. It was only a little blood.
Koenma: And didn’t they hit her *back*, not her head?
>which went down to the middle of her back.
Yuusuke: The blood or the hair?
Hiei: The blood. In large quantities.
>Her two silver ears lay flat against her head and her tail hung limply behind her.
Hiei: Because it was broken?
Koenma: Someone’s bloody-minded today.
Hiei: I’m not usually?
Kurama: He doesn’t like Sues especially. And, Botan did interrupt our perfect day.
Botan’s voice: I’m sorry!!
Kurama: [grunts]
Hiei: [kisses him deeply to distract him]
>She attempted to stand but was struck again with the whip causing her to fall back to her knees.
Kuwa: So, um. What other rumors are there?
Hiei: No!
Yuusuke: Well…
Hiei: Damn it.
Kurama: [fondles him to distract him]
Yuusuke: There’s the one about Firenze being Snape’s lover.
Kurama: What?!
Hiei: Who?!
Koenma: [whispers] He’s in Order of the Phoenix.
Kurama: He’s a centaur.
Yuusuke: And you’re a Youko and Hiei’s a fire demon. So what?
Kurama: That’s not the point. He’s just… He’s not Snape’s type.
Yuusuke: Do we *know* Snape’s type?
Kurama: Well… Point taken.
Yuusuke: I’m with you though. Actually, now that Sirius is dead, I’m kinda hoping Snupin is canon. Just don’t tell anyone I said that.
>She panted heavily, blood dripping from the numerous slashes on her back. “Why?”
Kurama: Because the author is trying to gain sympathy from the audience.
>she whispered as she looked at one man in particular.
Koenma: [one in particular] Don’t ask me; I’m the new guy.
>He had a long scar over his left eye and long black hair that laid lazily over his shoulders.
Koenma: Oh. Him.
Yuusuke: What happened to him anyway?
Koenma: Stood there and let the roof fall on him.
Yuusuke: Yeah, he struck me as a real dramatic guy.
>“Why do you torture demons?” she screamed. The man knelt down before her a cupped her chin.
Kurama: And stuck an apple in her mouth.
Yuusuke: [Sakyo] Does that answer your question?
>“Well, demons are useless for bodyguards if they are as soft as you are.
Hiei: [kissing Kurama’s neck] Soft… smooth…
Kurama: [grins]
Yuusuke: [decides not to point out that he sounds a bit like Anakin]
>Besides I'm bored.”
Kuwa: Um.
Yuusuke: Ignore it.
Kurama: Good idea.
>he said smoothly,
Kurama: That period should have been a comma and after smoothly should be a period instead.
Yuusuke: The grammar queen has returned!
Kurama: [gives him a withering look]
>“But you..... might be useful for more than a bodyguard.” as he turned her face and looked over her bloody body.
Yuusuke: Buggered body.
Kurama: I don’t think the author is British, Yuusuke. And, “as” should be capitalized.
Koenma: I did not know Sakyo well, but I knew him well enough to know that’s definitely NOT him.
Kuwa: Who cares?
Koenma: I like to respect the dead.
Hiei: Well, you’re the prince of the dead. Makes sense.
>The girl spat at him in disgust.
Yuusuke: Kinky.
Kurama: Ew. No, it’s not.
>The spit hit the man in the
Kurama: Yuusuke.
Yuusuke: I wasn’t going to say anything!
Kurama: Good.
Koenma: [pats Yuusuke’s shoulder]
>face. He released her chin and nodded to the man with the whip. He struck her again. The girl crumpled in pain. Finally, Shinobu couldn’t take it anymore.
Yuusuke: So he killed everyone in the room. The end.
Hiei: Good.
>He tackled the man with the whip and quickly beat him to a bloody pulp.
Yuusuke: And killed him.
Koenma: She really likes that word. “Bloody.”
Kuwa: Wannabe British.
Kurama: Only if she’s using it in the context of a curse.
>Itsuki helped the girl out of her chains and looked over her wounds.
Hiei: And adding some new ones.
Yuusuke: Right on.
>Neither Shinobu or Itsuki noticed the Black Black Club get away.
Yuusuke: Because they were dead.
>When Shinobu was satisfied with his job on the now dead man
Yuusuke: Well, at least *somebody* is dead.
Hiei: Like you?
Yuusuke: [glares]
>he walked over to where his partner and the girl were.
Yuusuke: --strangling each other over Shinobu.
Kurama: [Itsuki] Back off, Sue! He and all his personalities are MINE!
>The girl backed away a little as he came closer.
Yuusuke: With that funky arm-gun thing. That shit hurt.
Koenma: [cuddles]
>“It’s ok. I won’t hurt you.”
Yuusuke: Much.
>Shinobu said calmly as he crouched down before the girl.
>“Who are you?” she asked carefully.
Kuwa: I am ZIM!
Kurama: I’m Luke Skywalker, I’m here to rescue you.
Yuusuke: Chief!
Koenma: Macloud!
>“I am Shinobu Sensui and this is Itsuki, my partner.” he said as he acknowledged his friend,
Kurama: “Life partner,” Itsuki specified, glaring at the girl ominously.
>“And who would you be?”
Yuusuke: Skank.
Kurama: Elizabeth.
Koenma: Arwen.
Hiei: Amidala.
Kuwa: Relena.
>“My name is Cagally.” she said more comfortable with the human in front of her.
Yuusuke: Who should’ve started losing his mind about now.
Koenma: Yes, because, unless I’m mistaken, this is when Kazuya appeared.
Kurama: Wait… Cagally? Isn’t that the girl in Gundam Seed?
Yuusuke: Heh. Most Mary Sues make up their own names, not steal them from characters that are considered in some quarters as the anti-Sue.
>She attempted to stand but shrank back down to the ground and grabbed her ankle.
Yuusuke: Shrank?
Kuwa: Honey, I Shrunk the Mary Sue!
Hiei: Good. We can squash her and leave.
Kurama: Can we use the lawn mower instead?
>“You shouldn’t try to walk.” Shinobu advised as he touched her shoulder. Cagally looked at him like he was mad.
Yuusuke: Because he IS!
Kurama: Aww, she helped him keep his sanity. It must be true love. [makes mock hacking sounds]
>“Why do you care?” she snarled as she pulled her shoulder out of his warm grasp.
Yuusuke: [Sensui] I don’t; I’m getting paybacks for you raping my personality. Now hold still.
>“Because I’ve learned that all humans are horrible.” he said gravely.
All: …
Koenma: Well that’s a little more like it.
Yuusuke: Yup.
Hiei: It still sucks though.
Yuusuke: Of course.
>“Why does that make demons any different?” she countered.
Hiei: It doesn’t. Humans can be just as bad as demons.
>“Because my partner here is a shadow demon and I can trust him.” Shinobu said.
Yuusuke: [Shinobu] With my life… my body…
>‘I suppose I can trust this human. his spirit is pure from what I can sense.’ Cagally thought,
Koenma: No. Just the Shinobu personality.
Hiei: No kidding. She definitely fits the "dumb Sue" archetype.
>‘ And he is kind of cute.’
Yuusuke: For an insane misogynist bastard who would in reality sooner kill you as soon as look at you.
>“Would you like me to carry you?” Shinobu asked,
Hiei: While the real Sensui rolled over in his grave.
>breaking Cagally
Kurama: Into tiny, *bloody* pieces.
>from her train of thought. She looked at him, blue clashing with violet.
Yuusuke: In a heroic confrontation. But violet won.
Hiei: At least until blue was resurrected. That’s when everyone found out blue was half-demon.
Yuusuke: Hey! My eyes are brown!
Hiei: [shrugs]
Yuusuke: [pouts] You better not be saying I'm a Gary Stu...
Hiei: Well... You're half-demon, extremely powerful, have come back from the dead on more than one occasion...
Yuusuke: [glares] I am NOT a Gary Stu!
Hiei: [smirks] You said it, not me.
Yuusuke: Jerk.
Hiei: [smirks wider]
Koenma: [glares] Leave him alone.
Kurama: It's not Hiei's fault he can't take a joke.
Yuusuke: [grumbles] Yeah, and I could make some pretty interesting jokes on him if you want.
Kurama: [glares]
Kuwa: Um, guys? You're snapping at each other again for no reason.
Yuusuke: He's right. Let's get this MST over with.
Kurama: Fine.
Hiei: Whatever.
Kuwa: [sighs]
>She nodded and Shinobu carefully picked her up bridal style
Kurama: [sings] It’s a nice day for a white wedding…
Yuusuke: With hopefully the same outcome as in the Wedding Singer.
>and all three of them left the lair of the Black Black Club.
Koenma: And there were flowers and singing, yadda yadda.
Yuusuke: Is that the end?
Koenma: …. I think so.
Yuusuke: Good. So, in summary, the Mary Sue is --
Kurama: Delusional.
Hiei: Can’t accept that Sensui is gay.
Kuwa: Which is just sad.
[everyone exits eagerly, ready to get on with their day]
- Reikai -
Upon entering Koenma’s bedroom, Yuusuke quickly slipped into the lavatory and wiped off his feet with a wet washcloth. Koenma didn’t run around as much as he did, so the godling generally didn’t smell bad, but his own feet odor left much to be desired. Kuwabara’s were worse, though, he’d vouch for that defensibly! When he was finished he walked casually out and to the bed, where his boyfriend was waiting for him.
“Did you want to watch something?” Koenma offered. “You left Slayers here yesterday, and we didn’t finish--”
“No, we can do that later,” Yuusuke cut him off, grinning and sitting in front of him on the bed. “Actually, I just wanted to talk.”
Koenma’s eyes narrowed. Yuusuke had a look on his face. He knew that look. “Talk?”
Yuusuke laughed at his suspiciousness. “Yeah! What, boyfriends can’t talk?”
“Yes,” Koenma answered carefully. “Of course we can, Yuu-chan. If that’s what you *really* want to do.”
Yuusuke nonchalantly moved from his cross-legged position, spreading his legs and leaned backward. “*Yes* that’s what I want.”
Momentarily distracted by the lean body on show before him, Koenma didn’t think of anything to say right away. He blushed. “So. What did you want to talk about?”
Similarly distracted by Koenma’s blush, Yuusuke forgot what they had been talking about. “What?”
Koenma giggled softly. “You wanted to talk about ‘what’?”
Yuusuke laughed. “Yeah, and ‘who’ is on third!”
The godling’s own laughter was cut off as Yuusuke’s feet suddenly landed in his lap. His blush renewed. “Yuu-chan?”
Yuusuke blinked innocently, but not so innocent that the mischievous gleam in his eyes wasn’t obvious. “Hmm?”
“Um. Are you *sure* you wanted to talk?”
The teen rubbed his heels against his lap, edging along his groin. “Well… Okay, I lied.”
“I see that,” Koenma laughed breathily, gazing at the teen, still surprised by his directness. He had massaged Yuusuke’s feet before, and vice versa, but he had never pressed for more than that, still unsure of how his Tantei would react. So this was a surprise definitely, but a welcome one.
He motioned for Koenma to spread his legs apart to get more room, which the godling complied. His breath got heavier as Yuusuke began to rub his member with astonishing skill through his robes, and watched Koenma. The bright blush on Koenma’s cheek and his eyes glazed over in pleasure added to turn Yuusuke on as well.
Koenma was becoming overrun with sensation, but it wasn’t enough, he wanted to feel the younger man’s skin on him, so he hastily removed his trousers. Yuusuke smirked and rubbed the hardness, enjoying the loud gasping sound Koenma made as he did so. He pumped the length, squeezing it with his toes, and then rubbing it between the arches of his soft, warm feet. Koenma grasped his legs, kneading the skin, watching what was happening on his lap as Yuusuke watched him.
It soon became too much for Koenma, and he pulled one foot up to his mouth, sucking on the teen’s toes passionately. Yuusuke had done a good job working him up it seemed. Yuusuke gasped--Kurama and Hiei had been right about one thing, Koenma was *very* good with his mouth.
Briefly pausing to remove the teenager’s jeans and underwear, those talented lips and tongue worked their way up his waiting foot, working in-between his toes. He sucked on each liberally, one by one, and then took all of them into his mouth hungrily. Then he continued on, licking the sole of his foot, over the skin of his heel and lightly across his calf, then finally up to his thigh. He pushed Yuusuke gently onto his back and moved his legs apart. Koenma looked up and saw Yuusuke leaning up by his elbows, studying his every move.
Koenma grinned, pleased--he could tell Yuusuke was enjoying this very much, which made him happy. He bent his head and took the teen’s erection into his mouth.
Yuusuke cried out and nearly flew off the bed, but Koenma had been waiting for him to do that, and had a good hold on his hips, keeping the younger man from choking him. That mouth stroked him expertly, and Yuusuke’s hands flew to his hair, moving the soft brown tresses away from his face to see him better.
The Junior god enthusiastically licked up the younger man’s shaft, drawing out the strokes teasingly, then running his tongue eagerly over the head and slit before taking the erection fully in his mouth. While Yuusuke’s hands were still in his hair, stroking his skull, Koenma’s own were caressing over the teen’s lean, muscled frame. He ran one hand over his stomach and chest, playfully rubbing and pinching his nipples, until Yuusuke took the hand and pulled it into his mouth, sucking on his fingertips. Koenma’s other hand wandered along his back, stroking his spine and lower back.
Sucking on the fingers generously, Yuusuke stroked them in and out of his mouth, almost mimicking the motions Koenma made on his erection. His overactive imagination supplied an image of something other than fingers in his mouth, and reluctantly he pulled Koenma’s head up. He moaned when he did, and Koenma looked up at him, confused.
“Yuu-chan?”
Yuusuke smiled, feeling a little lightheaded from it all. “I’ve got an idea.”
Koenma raised an eyebrow and smiled back. “Should I be worried?”
Yuusuke grinned wider, winking. “Wait and see.” He pulled his top off and Koenma did the same without being asked to. Yuusuke gently prodded Koenma into lying down on his side, and then he moved himself into the same position, only with a twist. Koenma couldn’t help but giggle when his eyes fell on Yuusuke’s length staring him in the face.
“Worried?” Yuusuke joked, running his hands gingerly over the soft skin of the godling’s hips.
“I wouldn’t call it that,” the other replied, and his mouth returned to Yuusuke’s penis without warning.
Yuusuke gasped and nearly kept himself from bucking further into Koenma’s mouth. Dazed but determined to follow through with his plan, since the godling obviously had no objections, he pulled Koenma’s length into his mouth. He had done this to the junior god a few times before and now felt he had the hang of it. He stroked Koenma with his mouth while Koenma did the same to him. This was the most erotic thing they had done, and Yuusuke knew his orgasm was fast approaching. He curled his arm around Koenma’s hips to stroke his backside, and Yuusuke felt something he obviously couldn’t see. Koenma had his legs curled up. The teen reached over and found his feet.
Koenma moaned as his foot was being caressed by those strong, skilled fingers. That combined with the warm and wet mouth bringing him off, it wasn’t long before he came. His lips fell away from Yuusuke so he could cry out passionately, but Yuusuke’s mouth stayed on him, swallowing his cum. As he road out the aftershocks, Yuusuke moved so that he laid diagonally beside Koenma, his arms around him. He kissed the older man gently as he came to himself.
The kisses increased in passion, and Koenma could feel Yuusuke rubbing himself against his thigh. He pushed the teen onto his back, responding to the kiss just as eagerly and rubbed his leg hard against his erection. Yuusuke’s hips moved against his leg, the teen senseless as the pleasure wracked his body. His cries grew louder, pulling his mouth away from Koenma’s so he didn’t end up biting his tongue, and he clutched the godling’s shoulder’s in a tight grip. Koenma sucked on his neck slowly, unrushed since he had already come, only wanting to see to Yuusuke’s needs. He bit the skin hard enough to leave a bruise, and Yuusuke cried out even louder as he climaxed.
Kurama and Hiei had been wrong about one thing--Yuusuke wasn’t the biter, Koenma was.
Soothingly running his hands down Yuusuke’s back, Koenma gazed down at his breathless lover. He was beautiful, even with the scars, which only seemed to enhance the effect. Or maybe that was just because he loved him, Koenma wasn’t sure. He smiled tiredly and kissed the teen’s forehead. Dimly he realized they were lying upside down in the bed. He didn’t worry about that now, contentedly holding the teen close and drowsily closing his eyes.
TBC.
Quote -- Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, Page 360. Copyright J.K. Rowling.
This is the second foot-fetish lemon I’ve written in the past two weeks. XD No Thanksgiving episode, obviously. I’m shooting for a Christmas episode (which I already have a fic for). Anybody want to offer up a lemon for a New Years episode?