Yu Yu Hakusho Fan Fiction ❯ Feelings ❯ Lost ( Chapter 1 )

[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]

ce:...

Scottie: Say something.

ce: Rot in hell.

Scottie: *rolls eyes* I meant to your readers.

ce: *looks* *smiles slightly* Hey. Glad you decided to read this. *looks at cousin* *glares*

Scottie: *rolls eyes again* Would you stop that?!? I said it was the only way to wake you up!

ce: I've said it before, I'll say it again: Rot. In. Hell.

Scottie: *rolls eyes a third time* I went to her house this morning and poured water on her to wake her up. She's been in a bitchy mood towards me all day. *snickers* It was pretty funny, though. *snickers again*

ce: *glares* *looks at readers* *smiles* I'll warn you now. This chapter is pretty short, but if you read, and review, I'll extend the next chapter to make it a little longer. But, if no one reviews, I'll go ahead and remove this story and chapter. Or I might just post the second chapter for the hell of it. It doesn't really matter. But please, you shouldn't judge a story on the first chapter alone. Sometimes, the story just gets better from that point, even if the first chapter's not that good. Those are just my crappy thoughts. Maybe no one else thinks like that, but hey, if you do...well...I don't really know. Oh well. On with the chapter!

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Disclaimer: I'm poor. He's poor. I'm an idiot. He's a loon. Do ya really think we could own a damn thing? I think not.

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One figure...one, lonely figure...

...he stood...no...swayed...swayed in the wind.

The boy was about 5' 9". Very slender and small, but strong, build. Striking, emerald-green eyes. Beautiful, blood-red locks, about mid-back. He had very sharp, handsome features. He had many, faithful, loyal, and reliable friends. He was wanted and lusted after by nearly every man, woman, and demon in the three worlds. And he had a wonderful, picture-perfect, family. What more could you ask for?

He was the type of person, many would say, that had an absolutely, relaxed, luxurious life, with nothing to worry about, and able to do what, or who, he pleased. (a/n: Don't think I'm weird for putting that comment in there. It's a hentai fic, after all.)

But I'll bet you'll never guess where he was now.

Do ya give up? Oh well. Doesn't matter if you do. I gonna tell you anyway.

He was standing, no more than two feet, of the edge of a large, steep cliff. (a/n: Yeah, yeah. The lonkheaded cousin and I couldn't think of any other place to put him...although I could think of one place I want him. Scottie: *mutters* Perverted, hell-raising, bitch. ce: *mutters* Lonkheaded asshole.)

He didn't know why he was there. Just that he couldn't take any more of his so-called perfect life.

He had thought about returning to the Makai. But ruled against it. If he went back there, he would have to work for Yomi again. Yomi would just use him to warm his bed nearly every night. Like some wanton whore.

He had also decided against going up to Spirit World. If he told Koenma he wished to stop helping the detective, Yusuke Urameshi, he might imprison him once again.

Of course, staying in the Nigenkai was out of the question.

He had no choice. No other option. This was the only way he could assure himself no more pain.

There was nothing he could do. He had tried hiding his feelings...and had been...for so long...

...so long...that it hurt.

Everytime he felt something other than pain, guilt, hate, or remorse, he had to push it away.

Just...lock it up...so no one knew of his feelings.

He couldn't take it. He wouldn't.

He just wanted...no...needed... it all to end.

He was Youko Kurama.

He could not fall in love. He wasn't supposed to.

Yet...he had.

Unfortunately, the one he had fallen for, could never return his own feelings.

'How foolish could I be?' the demon asked himself. 'He could never return such feelings. He was not meant for them. But...even if he could, they would not be for me. I have betrayed him far too many times in our past, for him to even think of me as more than a friend, if that.' he reasoned. 'He must hate to see me every day. He hates me.' he thought sadly.

'Oh yeah? Then why does he always go to you when he is wounded?' questioned his inner voice. 'You know he would never admit to anyone, other than you, that he needs help, of any sort.' it said.

He felt a strong gust of wind around him, and a small wetness on his cheek. At first, he thought he was crying. But, then realized that it was raining. Kurama looked up at the sky. It had turned a dark, gloomy gray. Kurama smiled sadly. It seemed that the Kami-sama was feeling what he was at that moment. It was strange. The weather had always taken on a color similar to his mood. He shook his head.

'It doesn't matter.' the fox thought. 'It still hurts. I just...can't take it. It is too painful.' he thought, stepping closer to the edge of the cliff.

"I love you...Hiei." were the last words Kurama said, before falling...falling into the dark abyss.

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ce: *takes deep breath* Whaddya think? Was it good? Terrific? Bad? Atrocious? *pouts* I need answers people! Please tell me how I did. I have two other stories, and over a hundred visits, but only like, two or three reviews. My sister's wedding is coming up, and I'm her bride's maid, so that's really stressful. I have to help my sister arrange most of it. (I thought it was just the father-of-the-bride, the bride, the groom, and the other parents that do the arranging stuff, but nooooooooooooooooo. Not in this soon-to-be-joined family. Damn television...that's what got me into this. But, I guess it's a good cause.) *takes another deep breath* Please, please review. It will mean a whole lot to me and keep me goin'. Of course, like I said at the beginning, I could just post a second chapter for the hell of it. Not and extended chapter, though. *pouts more* Please review!

Scottie: *raises eyebrow* Calm down.

ce: Hmph! Like you care. Heartless, little...

Scottie: *interrupts* I do care...you tell anyone I said that, I will not hesitate to kill you.

ce: *sarcastically* Oh yeah. I feel loved.

Scottie: Whatever. Anyway, review so she can bring it down a bit. She needs the encouragement. Check out the other two stories, too. Review them. Please. We worked really hard. PEACE OUT, PEOPLES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!