Yu Yu Hakusho Fan Fiction ❯ Mission: Stupidity ❯ Here's the thing....... ( Chapter 3 )

 

 

Disclaimer drama- me-…..well……it's just so sudden Mr. Puppet…..

 

Mr. Puppet- I know, but, it's loove!!

Me- I don't think I can…..

 

Mr. Puppet- But! I've got nachos when they offer breadsticks!!

Me- Nachos eh…….Okay! LET'S GET MARRIED!!

Mr. Puppet- YAY!!

Me- Where are my nachos?

Mr. Puppet- Oh, alright. *gives me nachos*

Me- *Scarfing them down.*

 

Mr. Puppet- So, when should we set the date?

To be continued!!
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Oh yea, finally updating!! *Happy update dance* Okay, here's yer chappy.

 

Chapter 3- Here's the thing…….

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“There is no way…..no way in hell, I'm gonna put on any of these clothes……” Hiei said stubbornly, looking at the outfits.

 

“You know, you may find one you like.” Kurama told him. “I kind of like this one.” He pulled off a green button down shirt from a hanger, and then he found some black jeans with a little fox's face on the butt. The other guys laughed at what he chose, making poor Kurama blush.

 

“Nice Kurama-hahahahah!!!!!! Maybe if the girls don't look at ya, the guys will!!” Laughed Yusuke. Even Hiei, hard-ass Hiei, was laughing.

 

“Yea, you naughty kitsune!!” He pointed.

 

Kurama looked down. “They'll probably look better when I put them on……” He said quietly. There was a large screen, obviously for changing your clothes, so Kurama gathered himself, and went behind to change. In a few minutes, he came out. This only elicited many more laughs. The jeans fit him too tightly, and the shirt made him look, well, gay.

 

“THE IMPORTANT THING IS THAT I LIKE IT!!!” He yelled above the noise. Everyone shut up.

 

“Okay Kurama, jeeze, you don't have to bite our heads off.” Kuwabara said. Then, he started thumbing through the hangers of clothing. “OH YEA!! THE MASTER HAS FOUND HIS CLOTHES!!! BOOYA!!”

”Well, let's see them already.” Yusuke said.

 

“Bet it's worse than Kurama's” Hiei snorted. Kurama just glared. Then Kuwabara held up what he picked gleefully. Well, nobody laughed…..they were just too stunned.

 

Yusuke found his voice first, though it was still kinda squeaky. “You know that your holding a pink leopard print onesy, right?” He stammered.

 

“Yea, but…..” He was suddenly changed in his new outfit and striking a pose. “I look like a koneko in this!!” Now he was in front of a pink background with flowers and his hands were clasped and his cheek was resting on them. The three other boys were stupefied. Only one word was going through their minds at the moment. That one universal word….”Why?”

Kurama, who's mouth had been wide open from the shock, closed it, and turned to Yusuke and Hiei. “You two better go and pick out your outfits……” And then he whispered. “If you pick out anything like that, I go all rose whip on you.”

”You don't have to worry.” Hiei reassured, still shuddering and twitching from Kuwabara's display.

 

No matter what Hiei looked at, everything to him looked so…so......anti-Hiei…….

 

Hiei's POV-

 

Okay, I am still feeling myself twitch……I think it'll be permanent. I can't believe I'm still forced to take orders from a toddler. Just because he runs the spirit world while daddy is away….shoulda just chopped his stupid little head off when I stole that sword a while back….Damn, there is nothing here that I would ever wear….not even if my baby sister asked me to! Well, maybe if she asked nicely. I could feel my lower lip coming out into a pout. I gotta stop doing that….people think I look cute. I hate it when I look cute, though I have to say, I am a very attractive youkai. Oh wait….here is something….I found a black tank top, and a pair of black pants. I must have been lucky, because that was the only thing they had in here that was black. Except Kurama's pants, but I wouldn't wear anything with a design on my ass. Guess I'll get changed.

 

Normal POV-

 

“Hiei, are you done in there yet?” Yusuke sighed. “I wanna get changed to ya know.”

”If you expect me to come out wearing this, you can just stop wasting your damn time!” The little fire demon hissed. `What the hell was I thinking?!' He thought to himself. `Sure, it's black, but the pants are way too tight! They stink like a cow. God, sometimes I'm a baka.'

 

“Come on Hiei, it's already going on 5:15!” Kurama pleaded.

 

“NO!”

”Whatever you may be wearing, it can't be much worse than what Kuwabaka has on.” Yusuke argued. Hiei almost said something, but stopped himself. The detective was right for once.

 

“I think you got him.” Kurama whispered to Yusuke, who was getting his head chewed on by the ugly one.

 

“MY OUTFIT ROCKS AND YOU KNOW IT!!!”

”You…..are……MESSING UP MY HAIR!!!!” Yusuke yelled so loud that Kuwabara flew back, and the folding screen fell over revealing Hiei in his new attire.

 

“Well, it sure is something he'd wear.” Kurama commented looking him over. “I didn't know that you liked leather.”

”Is that what these pants are made of?! No wonder they smell like frickin' cow!” Hiei said loudly, and not to mention irritated. Yusuke pushed him aside and stood the folding screen back up.

 

“If you guys will excuse me, I'm gonna get dressed.” Yusuke had picked out a denim shirt that had the sleeves torn off, and a pair of gray faded jeans. Not exactly his style, but then again, no one was wearing what they would like to wear. No one that is, but Kurama. Yusuke stepped out.

 

“Looks like the detective has better taste than us.” Hiei remarked.

 

“Now, did Takkun say to meet him back out there?” Yusuke asked.

 

“Yes, I believe so. Let's be on our way.” Kurama informed them all as they left.

 

“Kuwabara, you aren't really gonna wear that are you?”

”What's that supposed to mean Urameshi? I like what I am wearing!” He snapped back in a matter-o-fact voice.

 

“Okay….whatever floats your gay cruise…..”

”YOU WANNA SAY THAT AGAIN?!” The enraged Kuwabara grabbed Yusuke by the collar, but his captive didn't seem to give a shit.

 

Takkun walked over to them in a fast pace. “What the hell took yous so lo-what the fuck are you wearin'?” He stopped short seeing the tallest boy who was clad in his onesy.

 

“I am koneko!!”

”Right….Next time you are deciding to wear that, come to me first or shave your damn legs. And you!” He pointed a finger to Kurama. “Nice job with your clothing. Maybe next time, you could pick out your own outfits without Liberaci's help.”

Kurama frowned and glared icily at the man.

 

“But hey, that's what we're lookin' for here.” Before anyone could ask about that last comment, he interrupted them. “Now, we ain't got much more time so let's practice your dance moves. Get on the stage.” The four did what they were told and followed him on the stage. “Now, you stand over here, you over there, you behind him, and you next ta that one.”

Soon, Yusuke and Kurama were in front of Kuwabara who was next to Hiei.

 

“Now, here comes the music. Just yous do what I tells yous too and it'll be fine.” He pushed the play button and the song “Butterfly” Boomed out, just loud enough for them to still hear Takkun's dance demands.

 

“Ay, iyaiyai,

Ay, iyaiyai

A-a-a iyaiyai,

Where's my samurai” Went the song.

 

“I want yous to turn to the side!” They did so. “Good, very good! Now, onesy boy get behind Yusuke, and shorty, behind Ricky Martin!”

”HEY!” Shouted Kurama.

”Now, slap the person in front of you on the ass and-“

”NANI?!?!?!?!” Yusuke screamed above everything and jumped off the stage, and got right in Takkun's face. “No Kuwabara is gonna slap my ass!”

”Fine. I'll have shorty slap it.”

”IIE!! You aren't getting it! I'm not gonna let any guy slap my ass! What is this, a gay night club?!”

“……Here's the thing…..” Takkun began. Yusuke and the others immediately paled.

 

“Your running a gay night club, and you couldn't be so kind as to tell us BEFORE we applied for the job??!?!?!?!?!?”

”I thought yous would know already! This club is only the biggest one for homosexuals in Tokyo! It opened up a month ago!”

'Of course!' Yusuke mentally smacked himself in the face. `We've only been on a mission the past month! Damn Koenma, whatever he wants here, it better be worth it!'

 

“I've been searching for a man

All across Japan

Just to find, to find my samurai

Someone who is strong

But still a little shy

Yes I need, I need my samurai”

 

“Do you think we could cut the music!?” Yusuke yelled.

 

“Ay, ay, ay-“ Takkun pushed the stop button. “Look, go and talk it over amounts each others. And then yous can come back and talk to me.”

”Excuse me while I go and have a little chat with Koenma.” He said darkly as he disappeared into the back room again. Once he reached his destination, he hastily pulled out his communicator, flipped it open violently and pressed the button to reach Koenma.

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In Spirit World….

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At this point, because neither are human, Botan and Koenma are now sobered up.

 

“B-Botan…..I think we're screwed….” Koenma stammered.

 

“You did want to send them to Club Squeegee right?”

”Squeegee?! No! I wanted them to go to Club Squeak Me!!! Club Squeegee is that new g-“ He was cut off by his communicator ringing. He transferred the call to the giant tv screen and was greeted by…..

 

“KOENMA YOU LITTLE JACK ASS!!!! IF I WAS OVER THERE I'D DROP KICK YOU TO GUAM YOU SON OF A BITCH!!!!!!”

”Yusuke….Yusuke, calm down!” Koenma tried to stop his yelling. He put his hand over the speaker so Yusuke couldn't hear him.

 

“What are we going to do?!” Botan panicked.

 

“Let's just go along with it! He'll only kill us if he finds out that this is a mission with the purpose of my own amusement! I hope…..” He uncovered the speaker. “Listen now,” He tried to be brave. “It is very important that you work there, I need what I lost and it's in that place!”

”HOW COULD YOU LOOSE SOMETHING IN A GAY NIGHT CLUB YOU PIECE OF SHIT?!??!”

'Oh great Koenma you baka!' He cursed himself. “Uh, Ogre took that object to the club, to uh, impress people….he's very gay.”

 

“FINE!!! BUT WHEN I COME BACK THERE YOU ARE IN SO MUCH TROUBLE!!! YOU HEAR ME!? YOU BETTER START BUYING ARMOR AND PRAYING!!!”

Koenma quickly shut off the communicator as to not get even more verbal abuse. Maybe he'd be in deep shit when the guys got back, but, by God, he was gonna enjoy watching them for the time being!

”Koenma sir, I'm scared!!! I think Yusuke really meant it!!!” The ferry girl wailed.

 

“Botan-“

”THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!!!!” She suddenly shouted pointing an accusing finger at him. “YOU AND YOUR POCKY!!!! I CURSE YOU!!!!!! CURSE YOU AND ALL YOUR POCKY FLAVORED PROMISES!!!!!!!!!!”

 

At this point, Koenma was more afraid of what Botan would do, more than what Yusuke would.

 

“Um, Botan…”

”NO!! DO NOT EVEN TRY TO RATIONALIZE THIS!!! YOU HAD TO GIVE ME THE BEER DIDN'T YOU!!!! And I….I've always been such a good little grim reaper!!”

”You are a good grim reaper!”

”BUT NOT GOOD ENOUGH RIGHT?! Nooooo, you didn't want a nice ferry girl, you wanted a…..BITCH!!!”

”…..” Koenma wasn't sure what to say because of her first swear word she's ever spoken.

 

“A BITCH WHO PLAYS TERRIBLE PRANKS ON HIS FRIENDS!!”

”Come on Botan! You know you were just as bored as me! We are in this together!!!!”

”For now!! When Yusuke comes to kill us, I'm so out of here!!” With that, she grabbed her sixth box of pocky and began eating.

 

Koenma sighed and wondered what his funeral procession would be like….

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All done!!! I'll probably have the next chapter up by at least Saturday if not sooner. If I don't put it up Saturday, someone can yell at me. But, not too much! I do have a life too! Even though it's mostly based on anime…….Okay, so I'll update real soon, promise!