Yu Yu Hakusho Fan Fiction ❯ What the YYH Gang Does Offset ❯ Pairings...what? Traumatization! ...interesting disclaimer... ( Chapter 3 )

What the YYH Gang Does Offset

EBD: WE'RE BAAAAAAAAAAACK!!!

TC: And we're at my house this time!!!

KK: Oh God, spare me…

DE: BLOW POPS!!!!!!!! (steals all the blow pops)

EBD: MY BLOW POP!!!!!!

TC: MY BLOW POPS!!!!!!! THEY'RE MINE!!!!

EBD: DUEL!!!! WITH THE BLOW POPS!!!!!!!!!!

DE: >_>;;

KK: I do not know these people!!!

TC: One…Two…Three! Draw!!! (turns around and points a blow pop at EBD)

EBD: (turns around and point blow pop at her own head)

Everyone: (cracks up)

TC: That's not the right way, EBD…

De: I bont' bike bis keybah…

KK: What???

DE: I bon't bike bis keybah!!!

TC: Okay DE, take the blow pop out of your mouth.

EBD: I can understand her!!

DE: (takes blow pop out) I said I don't like this keyboard!!

KK: (eats Choco-O's) THESE THINGS ARE GOD!!!

DE: Uh, no, they're Oreo knock-offs..

TC: Umm, I have bubbles…

DE and EBD: BUBBLES!!!!!!!!

KK: We are so wrong…

TC: Yeah, my mom asked me, "Aren't you guys too old for those?" I was like, "NO!"

DE and EBD: (says No with TC)

KK: Hmm…what to make fun of now… (thinks) OO, TREADMILL!!!

TC and EBD: OH NO!!!!!!!

DE: (keeps typing the whole incident)

TC: GET AWAY FROM THE TREADMILL!!!!!!!!

KK: (gets off and starts dancing, then gets upset cause her song ended)

DE: What? (sees KK's expression)

KK: My song ended…let me see what you wrote!

TC: O_O; Oh God…NOW THEY'RE BOTH STARTING TO PLAY DARTS!!!!!

EBD: (misses the board both times and hits the wall)

KK: (laughs hysterically) HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

DE: >_>;;; She's scaring me…

EBD: (runs in) I'm done…cause KK's scaring me…

DE: I would go out and beat her ass, but I'm typing… so I'll do it later!

KK: YOU COULD NEVER BEAT MY ASS!!!

DE: At darts! …and other things…(evil grin)

All but DE: O_O;;;

KK: The only thing you could beat me at is darts.

DE: Wanna make a bet?

KK: Sure, I'm loaded!

DE: BRING IT ON!!!!! (gets into a fight with KK)

TC: They sounded so wrong….O_O;; DON'T BREAK THE AIR HOCKEY TABLE !!!!!!!

EBD: WEE!!!! I'M GONNA BOUNCE UP AND DOWN!!!!!!

TC: >_>;; Okay, KK wants to start the fic…

KK: (accidentally grabbed DE"s shirt and tore the straps)

DE: O_O KK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (fight resumes and ends in a draw, DE's shirt torn in pieces and her clothes have slashes in them, and KK's clothes have slashes in them too, one strap torn)

TC: O_O;;

EBD: O_O;; Umm…

DE and KK: (start laughing)

TC: What's so funny??

DE: (shrugs and stands up) Just a friend thing, I guess.

KK: Heh…

TC: (to EBD) …don't tell them…

EBD: (makes a gesture saying her lips are sealed)

DE: Okay, DISCLAIMER!!!!!!

TC: (while laughing) We do not own Yu Yu Hakusho or any other characters except KK owns herself, I own myself, EBD's another story, and DE is owned by many.

DE: (glares at TC) I OWN MYSELF, THANK YOU!!!

KK: Then what about Youko?

DE: (turns red) Shut up!!

TC: DE, don't forget Monday at 5:30!!

DE: (turns even redder than a cherry) SHUT UP!!!!!!!!!! (smacks TC)

KK: ON WITH THE FIC!!!!!!

TC: MONDAY AT 5:30!!!!!!!

DE: (tackles TC)

Yusuke: Kuwabara!!!! It's time for us to film your fight with Shishiwakumaru!!! (knocks loudly on Kuwabara's trailer door)

Kuwabara: (doesn't answer)

Yusuke: KUWABARA!!!!!!!!! Damn… (enters and hears something from the bedroom…enters) %_%

Kuwabara: (doesn't notice Yusuke)

Yusuke: (leaves and runs into Keiko) %_%

Keiko: What's wrong, Yusuke?

Yusuke: %_% Kuwa… %_% …bara…. %_%

Keiko: O_o What are you talking about?

Yusuke: %_%

Keiko: (sighs) We need Kuwabara on the set now. I'll go get him. (walks up to Kuwabara's trailer) Kuwabara? It's time for your fight with Shishiwakumaru!

Kuwabara: (doesn't answer)

Keiko: (enters) Kuwabara! I'm not going to play games! (hears something from the bedroom) What the…? (goes in and sees Kuwabara masturbating) %_%

Kuwabara: (doesn't notice)

Keiko: (leaves and runs into Yusuke)

Yusuke and Keiko: %_%

(DE: This one is KK's idea…she wanted to continue the Karasu taking away an unconscious Kuronue…)

Kuronue: (storms out of Karasu's trailer) I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU DID THAT!!!!

EBD, TC, Jin, and Touya: Did what?

Youko: Shit! He found out…

KK: We gave him to a psychopath that potentially raped him. Of course he'd find out!!

Hiei: He was unconscious though!

DE: Did it ever occur to you that he might WAKE UP?!

Hiei and Youko: No…

KK and DE: …bakas…

Karasu: But I thought you liked it, Kuronue darling!

All: (shudder) EW!!!!

KK: Karasu, you do realize that Kuronue's taken by my crew member OR.

Karasu: You mean he got to him first?

TC: OR's a girl, idiot!

Kuronue: I'm straight, get it?

Karasu: You could have fooled me last night…

Kuronue: That's because you drugged me!

KK: (puts a comforting arm around Kuronue's shoulder) Come on, I'll take you to OR's place. She'll make you feel better.

Youko and DE: In more ways than one!

Touya and Jin: (to Karasu) You're really messed up, man…

TC: I know a great therapist. Here! I'll give you his number! (whips out a small white card)

KK: How do you know a therapist?

TC: That's the card with the number of your therapist that you gave me.

KK: Oooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

All: (shake heads)

Hiei: I don't think the therapy has helped her much.

DE: You can say that again…

EBD: Since when did KK go to a therapist?

KK: Since my mom died…

All but TC, EBD, and DE: Your mom died?

KK: Yeah…it's a touchy subject… (has tears in eyes)

Hiei: (looks interested) Was there a lot of blood?

DE: (smacks Hiei) HIEI!!!!!!!!!!

Youko: You should be more sensitive.

TC: (mutters) Oh, like he's sensitive…

EBD: (mutters) Like Youko's sensitive, either…

TC: That's what I was talking about!

EBD: Oh… (starts laughing with TC)

Youko and DE: (tackle TC and EBD) GGGGRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!

(DE: This one was inspired by TC, EBD, a few of my friends, and I talking on the internet about pairings for YYH… ^_^;; I thought it might be fun to see what will happen!)

DE: Yusuke and Koenma.

All: (shudder and scream)

KK: Yusuke and Yukina.

Hiei: If you touch my sister, you die.

TC: Hiei and Koenma.

KK: O_O;;

EBD: The Toguro brothers and Yusuke.

All: %_%

DE: Genkai and Yusuke.

KK: EWEWEWEWEW! (twitch twitch spaz spaz)

Yusuke: %_% %_% %_% (twitch)

Genkai: %_% HELL NO!

KK: Yukina and Botan.

TC: (shudders) EW!

TC: Kuwabara and Botan. (shudders)

All: (shudder and twitch)

Kuwabara: YAY!

Botan: (whacks Kuwabara and then spazzes)

EBD: The Toguro brothers, Koenma, Yukina, and Botan.

KK: That's not even a pairing…that's a gang!

DE: FOUR-WAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

All but DE: >_>;;

Youko: You are sick and twisted…

DE: But you still love me! I think…YOU STILL HAVE TO MARK ME!!!!!!!!

Youko: (smirks) Then let's go to a room…

DE: (thinks) YOUKO AND THE TOGURO BROTHERS!!!

All: %_% %_% %_% %_% %_% (twitch twitch)

Youko: EWEWEWEWEWEW!!! YOU ARE SICK AND TWISTED!!!

DE: ^_^:;; It's my friend, I swear! He influences me, even though we haven't talked for so long!

KK: Oh yeah, right! It was you and you know it! (thinks) Kuronue and Botan!

Botan: That wouldn't be that bad…(thinks `At least it's not with Karasu…'…shudders)

Hiei: (smirks) I read Botan's mind. I have a pairing.

Botan: NO NO NO! DON'T SAY IT!!!

Hiei: Botan and Karasu.

Botan: (shudders and twitches)

All: EW!!!!! %_%

TC: Keiko and Karasu.

All: (shudder)

EBD: Touya and the Toguro Brothers!

TC: %_% %_% %_%

Touya: %_% %_% %_%

All: %_%

DE: Okay, I have one, actually a lot, but TC and EBD, do you promise not to hurt me?

TC: (runs out)

EBD: I promise…

DE: Okay…Jin and Touya.

TC: (runs back and forth) EW! EW EW EW EW EW EW!!!!!!!!!

EBD: (acted calm) ..that's not right…TOUYA'S MINE!!!!!

KK: I thought you liked Jin! TRAITOR!!!!!!

EBD: OOPS! I MEANT JIN!!!!!!!

All: Suuuuuuurrrrrrre…

KK: Genkai and King Yama. (Like God, Koenma's really big dad…)

All: %_% %_%

TC: Jin and the Toguro brothers! (glares at EBD)

EBD: (tackles TC)

TC: (slaps EBD)

DE: OKAY YOU TWO, STOP!!!!!

EBD and TC: (stop and resettle themselves)

EBD: Touya and Yusuke.

Touya: %_%

Yusuke: %_%

DE: (snickers)

TC: What's so funny?

DE: Nothing…(tries to suppress laughter)

All: O_o;; okay…

DE: Juri and George.

All: %_%

KK: George and Koenma.

All: %_% %_%

Koenma: EW!!!

TC: Jin and Hiei!

EBD: %_%

Jin: %_%

EBD: Hiei and Youko.

DE: %_% (tackles EBD) YOUKO IS MINE!!!!

Youko: %_%

Hiei: %_%

KK: Where'd DE go?

TC: I think she's in her room.

KK: Then where's Youko?

EBD: (walks in the room) Umm, I think he's in DE's room.

KK: O_O;; I don't wanna know…

TC: Do you think he's finally marking her?

All: (hear a scream from the other room)

KK: Umm, yeah, probably. If not one way, then the other.

TC: (twitch)

KK: We are so wrong…

EBD: BANANA!!!!!!!!!!

TC: BLOW POPS!!!!!!!!

EBD: STRAWBERRY!!!!!!!!

TC: PURPLE DOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

KK: Ah, what the hell? PEACHES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

TC: SALAD!!!!!!!!!!

EBD: COCONUT!!!!!!!!!!

KK: PIXIE STI-

DE: (comes out of room, blushing, her hair all messed up, Youko behind her, his hair messed up as well)

KK: What happened to you two? (quirks a brow)

DE: Ummm…(blush intensifies)

KK: I think I know what happened…

EBD: What??

KK: You're too young to understand.

Youko: Let's just say it was fun. (smirks at DE)

KK: You have a sick mind.

TC: Leaving now! (starts to walk out the room)

KK: Take EBD with you! (pushes EBD to TC)

Hiei: (pops out of nowhere, hiding a wrench behind his back) Hey KK, you're trailer's broken. Where are you going to sleep tonight?

KK: It is?! FUCK!! I just spent a night in the sewer fixing the plumbing!!

Hiei: Maybe you should let a professional cover that.

KK: Are you kidding?! They don't pay me enough for that! I'm just a poor, lowly director.. (tries to look poor)

DE: Yeah, right. That's why I'm living in luxury as well.

KK: OH SHUT UP!!!!!!

DE: (evil grin)

KK: Okay, I'm saving up to buy a super expensive laptop that will allow me to control anyone I wish because of its awesome powers.

DE: Now you're dreaming.

KK: Seriously!

Hiei: I think you better use your money for the plumber.

KK: (sigh) Okay… So, where am I going to sleep tonight?

Hiei: I think I know. (smirks)

KK: (thinks) Oooooohhhhhhhhh!!!

DE: …she's dense…

Youko: (leaves to kill DE"s trailer, going behind Hiei's back and grabbing the wrench)

DE: Um, well, I know where that's going, so please…REVIEW!!!!!!!! (dances)