| "Truth Is Beautiful" Reviews/Comments [ 4 ] |
Title: ...
Reviewed By: merribell^_^ On: September 27, 2005 16:39 CDT
Comment/Review:
I think this has the potential to be really good.... but frankly, I wasn't able to finish reading this, I was too annoyed with the excessive use of fangirl Japanese in this fic. I know you probably watched the anime and thus things like "Utena-sama" etc. seem natural... but you really overdid it, every third word was Japanese, and there were a couple of mistakes in there, too.
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Reviewed By: Galaxy_Girl [MediaMiner Member] On: December 11, 2004 22:30 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 7 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 9 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 8 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 5 of 10
Overall Rating: 6 of 10 Comment/Review:
Well, it's pretty okay and not bad for a lemon. It would make a good Harlequinn book, but... Can I make a suggestion? There is nothing in the world more irritating than reading Japanese dialogue in an English fanfic. I don't care if Utena and co are supposed to be in Japan, this fanfic is in English. It makes no sense for them to be suddenly bursting out with things like "Daijonbu, Utena-sama!" PEOPLE DO NOT TALK LIKE THAT. It's also extremely annoying to be reading along and then be met with a few sentences that you cannot understand. If this were to be rewritten with the Japanese dialogue cut, it would be 100% better.
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Reviewed By: Safarigirl On: July 20, 2003 23:44 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 8 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 9 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 9 of 10
Overall Rating: 9 of 10 Comment/Review:
This was pretty good. I liked the lemon alot too. Write more like this. Ciao ^_^ |
Reviewed By: Midnight Star [MediaMiner Member] On: April 15, 2003 19:46 CDT
Rating(s):Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
That was a great lemon! Please write more Utena and Touga lemons!!! If you ever want to co-write with me e-mail me. |
