| "Love Without Fear" Reviews/Comments [ 36 ] |
| Pages (3): [ « ‹ 1 2 3 ] |
Reviewed By: Chata On: June 11, 2004 21:16 PDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 9 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Nice story. Me like.
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Reviewed By: Denmark de la Croix [MediaMiner Member] On: June 11, 2004 19:49 PDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 9 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 9 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 8 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 8 of 10
Overall Rating: 8 of 10 Comment/Review:
it's settled. i don't like bulma. does she just drive men to infidelity? i don't really like vegeta either. i'm actually surprised their marriage lasted this long. your take on this is convincing. your dialogue is good. with this story i actually think you need to slow down the pace a little. sometimes i feel like not enough reason is shown for the character's reactions. it IS told, but i don't see it. and a lot of that i think could be solved in taking one more moment before the characters react. so the reader has a moment to SEE the reason. but really good overall. you seem to be very forgiving of men who cheat?????
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Reviewed By: jalan On: June 11, 2004 19:45 PDT
Comment/Review:
really good chapter. even though i don't like vegeta, i'm not happy that he and bulma are fighting. i hope they'll be back together soon. nicely written.
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Reviewed By: jalan On: June 11, 2004 19:33 PDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 9 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 9 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 8 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 8 of 10
Overall Rating: 8 of 10 Comment/Review:
hi. i liked the story. it really gets good at the end - the element of suspense.
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Reviewed By: MelizaMac [MediaMiner Member] On: June 11, 2004 19:19 PDT
Comment/Review:
I can't believe it. I think I've found 'someone' to hate even more than ChiChi! You've created a fantastic villainess - pretty, cunning, ambitious, and what a bitch! It was a perfect setup, and although I abhor affairs, Bulma should have seen something like this coming. Hopefully she'll come to a similar conclusion during her solitude. Chapter Two was so sad. It's obvious that Vegeta had adapted to his life on Earth and the recent changes have thrown him for a loop. Enter the Bitch to turn him completely upside-down. Bulma's reaction just tore me up. You know she wanted to scream and throw things and probably gouge the woman's eyes out, but she came up with the perfect response that couldn't be discounted. The bedroom scene made me cry harder. It was extremely emotional; Vegeta sounded like every other man that's been caught with his pants down. I just have to feel badly for him though. If only because 'he ain't from these parts.' :) I don't think 'happy' will be in any of the next few chapters, but I'm sure looking forward to a little sunshine for those two.
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Title: horrible wonderful thrill...
Reviewed By: debbiechan [MediaMiner Member] On: June 09, 2004 07:07 PDT
Comment/Review:
You know I adore this chapter, Lisa. I've read infidelity lemons before and dark lemons before but this one is so compelling--sexy but not emotionally gratifying in the way most ff lemons are. The concern for the characters, story, Vegeta's freaking folly and dread for his marriage is a strange sort of undertone for a reader while reading such a hot little lemon! And the confrontation scene in Bulma's bedroom has made me cry three times now--each time I've read it! That "you could've killed me" line just kills ME! Your writing is so in control of the story. I've rarely been so wildly curious in a continuation fic to find out how the plot resolves itself, and what's more, I'm just dying for more of your little details of dbz life in this era (Marron? What's she like? What role will the baby play? Hey, where's that ole cheat but good buddy Yamcha?) Oh great freaking Kami, I love this fic!! YOUR FAN, debbiechan
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Reviewed By: amy04 On: May 30, 2004 14:22 PDT
Comment/Review:
This is really well done! I dont want to believe any of it but I do. I guess Veg would do something like this is he was really angry and Bulma was being psycho. I hope she realizes what she's done!!!
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Title: NO!
Reviewed By: super girl On: May 28, 2004 18:10 PDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! oh my god! is he going to cheat on her??!!!! NOOOOOO!!!!!! shure bulma's being stupid but... VEGETA CHEATING!!!???? thats just wrong! i mean his prioritys are all based on trust and loyalty! p.s. oh and by the way...GIVE THAT SEDUCING BITCH WHAT SHE'S GOT COMING!!!!
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Reviewed By: christabeleve61 On: May 18, 2004 15:12 PDT
Comment/Review:
WOW, I loved how you got into Vegeta's head, great flow and well written.
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Reviewed By: Bardockgurl [MediaMiner Member] On: May 18, 2004 12:21 PDT
Comment/Review:
Ohhhhhh - why do you people post fics?? *Cries* Now I have to try and think of WHY I liked the fic, when all I can usually think of is, "Because I did." That's it... That's as intelligent as I get in reviews... :( Umm, it was VERY well written, very plausible, very enjoyable and I'm looking forward to the next chapter - I hope you do manage to update regularly... Hmmm, with this lack of Literary skills, I could be a new Superhero... "Poor Quality Review Gurl"!!! OK... no more coffee for me today... LOVED the story and looking forward to more... :D
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Title: oh no! oh yes!
Reviewed By: debbiechan [MediaMiner Member] On: May 17, 2004 17:55 PDT
Rating(s):Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
It's up! I'm very excited about this story, Lisa! The set-up is completely believable and I love the way you ended the chapter with Vegeta saying "Lead the way" ( resonating with that line and his whole pride goeth before the fall stuff in the Brolly movie!) I want tohate to see Vegeta being such an ass but then again, he has always been one, and I've loved him for it too! Fascinating that you are exploring this ground and this time period, where there is so much up for speculation and where I suspect, knowing V&B, there was no Cinderella story ending but a vibrant, constantly maturing relationship. debbiechan
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Title: love without fear
Reviewed By: mlf On: May 16, 2004 15:24 PDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
wow good story.can't wait for more chaps...maria
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Reviewed By: bluejade On: May 16, 2004 07:39 PDT
Comment/Review:
in a way it is a good story but if this a B/V breakup i stop reading it
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Reviewed By: Phantomscribe72 - Not logged in On: May 16, 2004 05:28 PDT
Rating(s):Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
I half expected the "other woman's" name to be Lisa! Very well written. Totally believable that Vegeta would turn to someone else for what he needs (physically & emotionally) with Bulma shutting him out. Good start.
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Reviewed By: joline On: May 16, 2004 04:58 PDT
Comment/Review:
I've read some stories about infidelity before, but this is the first that accutaly made sense. very good.
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| Pages (3): [ « ‹ 1 2 3 ] |
