| "Oden Shop" Reviews/Comments [ 61 ] |
| Pages (5): [ « ‹ 1 2 3 4 5 › » ] |
Reviewed By: RadioActiveRedhead [MediaMiner Member] On: March 21, 2008 20:09 CDT
Comment/Review:
When Kagome gets out of the car crash in the second chapter you say "gambatte" there is no M in that word. Because, the only single lettering in their alphabet is A, I, U, e, o and N. Everything else has 2 of our alphabet letters mushed together example: Ga, ba, te, wa. I believe only two hiragana has 3 of our letters in it. "Shi" and "Tsu". The word you meant to spell is actually "Ganbatte" >_o. Also when he invites Kagome over to his house he tells Shippo..."Sit down; don't move before I told you so." instead of the word Told I think you meant "tell". If you would like I could be your beta on Japanese words. I'm in my 4th year of studying it and I do know a bit. Not to mention my English isn't half bad either :P I have kept A's in both classes. So please, if you would, consider it and write me an email on your decision. I would love to beta for you because I really love some of your work. :)
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Reviewed By: The Empress On: September 28, 2007 05:57 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 8 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 9 of 10 Comment/Review:
*sniffs* Mommy, its ovvvveeerrrrr...* sniffle snif sniff* hehehe. ^.^ This is one of my favourite fics. The storyline was well paced and it was believable. I loved that it showed that love is not perfect, and that a person can love more than one person in their lifetime. But also that with each person, that love is different. I liked your original ending the most, the part with Inu Yasha was not necessary, but I can see how some would be angry about not including him in the reincarnation. I enjoyed the way you included some of the main characters. I would have liked to see Kirara show up. *wipes tears from eyes* this was such a beautiful story. A true romantic story with a little adult entertainment. *stares off into space lovingly and sighs* Bravo! I hope you write another story, this one was really good. You really kept things interesting and included shades of grey, not just black and white. You are well versed in the matters of the heart.. *sighs* any-hoo, well done and thank you for giving Sesshy some emotion, and not just a frosty heart. *gives a whoot-oot shout out*... waiting patiently for next story... .The Empress
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Title: Oden Shop
Reviewed By: Megan Consoer [MediaMiner Member] On: January 24, 2006 14:25 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
I really like this story alot. Can you please write some more chapters? Or can you write a sequel to this story please?
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Title: Oden Shop
Reviewed By: Megan Consoer [MediaMiner Member] On: May 11, 2005 21:49 CDT
Comment/Review:
I really like this story alot. Can you write some more chapters?
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Reviewed By: Fanilia [MediaMiner Member] On: April 05, 2005 12:09 CDT
Comment/Review:
The suggestions I made are some of the things the are looked at when a fiction is submitted for featured status. It really is a great story and could be worth submitting to featured after its been beta'd I don't have time very often to read an entire fiction, I'm glad I took the time to read this one. ((forgot to watch the size limit on the review))
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Reviewed By: Fanilia [MediaMiner Member] On: April 05, 2005 12:05 CDT
Comment/Review:
I very much enjoyed your fiction. I was actually looking into another account when I found this. Reviews speak volumns and based on them I decided to read a little bit of the fiction. The story was good, involved and had deep underlying meanings. You used enough elements to make it interesting, yet keep us off balance till the end. The twist with the Koshosho added that element that could tear the Kagome's and Sesshoumaru's world apart. I think though fate in the form of Aiko changed what could have been any ending to any fiction into something special. There are some parts that I felt un necessary, mostly explaining that drama twice, I also think the abruptly pulling the reader out of the fiction in order to explain the show it was based off of isn't the best way to give us the side information, there should be a way for you to work the explaination into the plot. I would also suggest now the the story is complete to go back and have a beta reader really go through each chapter, I noticed a lot of gender switching where he should have been she and the other way around. I'd also suggest now that the core group of reviewers has finished this you might want to go back and remove the comments made to each at the end of each chapter. I doubt if those people are going to go back and read them time and again, and I know those of us who do not know these reviews are not that interested in the replies to them. The suggestions I made are some of the things the are looked at when a fic |
Title: Oden Shop
Reviewed By: Megan Consoer [MediaMiner Member] On: March 26, 2005 14:13 CST
Comment/Review:
I really like this story alot. Can you write some more chapters?
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Reviewed By: aikotakara [MediaMiner Member] On: December 22, 2004 23:06 CST
Comment/Review:
i have to admit, there were so points in the story where i was thouroughly confused but it was a really good story now the less. i love how you had inuyasha at the end and running away from kikyo lol but it makes you wonder, if kiktos reincarnation is chasing inuyasha then what about kagome lol ahahaha anyways great story! i really enjoyed it.
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Reviewed By: draegon [MediaMiner Member] On: November 21, 2004 11:13 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 9 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
I loved the ending!!!! Kagome and Sesshomaru needed to let go of that pain they had so they could truly move on and be with each other 100%. Loved what you did with Kikyo, I was cracking up.
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Title: *sniff sniff* Nooooooooo
Reviewed By: LadySessho [MediaMiner Member] On: November 21, 2004 00:21 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
*sniff sniff* *cries softly heard in back ground* [y] hey sessho what you do to my big sister? {s} *bewildered* i didnt do anything. she been on the puter again. (k) one of her fav fics is over and she's crying over the sweet ending. so leave her alone to morn the loss of her friends :me: thx kag i be ok {s} so you'll stop crying :me: *sigh* yes now leave me in peace love so i can take to the wonderful author. i'm so happy you finally updated but suprise suprise its an ending. it was beautifully done. kag helping that poor woman move on. and finally realizing that sessho did care for her and not wanting her as a replacement for rin. see i knew there was such tenderness in sessho, caring for an orphanage hehehe. how sweet can the big fluff get {s} this sesshomaru is not sweet nor is he fluff. [y] yeah yeah tell that to the papers lol (k) uh yasha i think you had better run... NOW {s} you'll die for that pup [y] later saki love the fic even though you made kikyou a guy and had him chasing after me (k) *falls over with laughter* i thought it was a sweet justice :me: *snickers* o blink love hehehe great touch there at the end. see shippou got the girl and so did sessho and yasha... he got the guy lol sweetie i loved the fic and sorry i gave you such a hard time but c'est la vie. and hopefully you come soon with another one just as sweet. *wipes a tear* parting is such sweet sorrow but i still got your other fic for a while. *hug & kisses from the gang* {s} speak for yourself |
Title: Awwwwwww
Reviewed By: Anne_WritinAngel [MediaMiner Member] On: November 20, 2004 19:48 CST
Rating(s):Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
That was just, "awwwww" it brought me to tears, I love this fic, sigh and now its ended....
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Reviewed By: draegon [MediaMiner Member] On: November 09, 2004 00:13 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
I just started reading this fic...I really love it. I really can't go into details, but I can really empathsize with the characters. I actually cried in the last chapter when Kagome left Sesshomaru. Was he in love with Rin, and finds Kagome as a replacement? Or did he care for her strictly as a father cares for a daughter?? I'm really curious to find out who the woman in the park with Kagome is. I also have the hope that Sess goes after her and finally opens up to her. Kagome's been hurt too much, and I think she deserves some peace finally.
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Reviewed By: busoshwe [MediaMiner Member] On: November 09, 2004 00:08 CST
Rating(s):Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
I'm not sure what I think of this story anymore. Part of me is confused to holy hades and back, and the other part wants me to light a fire under you to get the rest of the story out so I can 'get it'. Or perhaps I'm just too dense. *_* In either case, I anxiously await the next chapter
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Reviewed By: Mystic Hanyou [MediaMiner Member] On: November 08, 2004 19:56 CST
Comment/Review:
I see a lot of 'No Duh' issues happening. First Kagome is going to know why Sessho can't talk and Koshosho is going to realize what she has been missing. And Sesshoumaru, well. I don't know about him. But I am sure you do. So get going with the next chapter. Please!!!!
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Reviewed By: LadySessho [MediaMiner Member] On: November 08, 2004 19:03 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
no never hate your fiction or you my dear. just someone trying to destroy something they dont have. see look while she thought she loved sessho all those years shippou fell in love with her and she missed it. sessho needs to wake up before he loses kag forever. please keep writing your lovely story {s} see look what you did you upset the author [y] but all she wrote was that she didnt like kosh leave her alone baka (k) well i didnt care for her either the way she scared off me. but you didnt help eith sessho so dont you yell at her :me: no no leave them alone kag kosh is just a lost lil girl with hero worship gone on way to long. maybe shippou can change that. *shippou* change what lady? :me: not you hun the story your charater is in *shippou* oh ok can me and rin go play the playstation game of inyasha :me: sure can sweetie but dont get mad and throw it again that game is hard to come by and the tv isnt cheap either. {s} dont know why they like playing that silly game anyways [y] keh really its stupid (k) well wouldnt you know and here ive got a video of you two playing that silly game O_O {s}what [y] no your lying :me: oh grow up you two hey saki if you want them you can have them but please give us a new chappie soon :) :me:(sits and writes "i love Murasaki K fanfictions... i love Murasaki K fanfictions) {s}get up teiya i think saki got the point. now come and fix us dinner (k) uh sessho i... [y]come on kag lets go. see ya later bro :me:fix you dinner... baka (slams door)
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