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| "The Herb" Reviews/Comments [ 22 ] | | Pages (2): [ 1 2 > » ] | Title: update
Reviewed By: pup [MediaMiner Member] On: February 20, 2006 05:57 CST
Rating(s):Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Oh yea, if u still have time, more please? dat was really hoy! update update update? please?
| Reviewed By: pup [MediaMiner Member] On: February 20, 2006 05:55 CST
Rating(s):Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Its sooo amazing! I lurve it! n it got humor in it!lol. what if Shippou really did checked on dem n saw wat deyr doing? *laughs* dat'll b so hilarious! nice lemon! ^-~
| Reviewed By: Akihana [MediaMiner Member] On: November 19, 2005 21:08 CST
Comment/Review:
oh god. That was hot, to say the least. I think only Miroku and Inuyasha would ever find it interesting to "share." or Inu and Sango, I guess. Or...nevermind, they must have been really high. I can't believe Kaede packed so much soup. They aren't going to be traveling for quite some time, methinks. poor Shippo, left to hang out with Kirara and listen to the sounds of the love fest.
| Title: horny
Reviewed By: ???????? On: June 12, 2005 00:18 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Hot damn.....I'm so fu*king horny you have no idea....my nipples are hard as everything. damn....my panties are a little damp too. Some one do that to me now!! so horny if it went any further i woulda cummed.
| Title: ^.~
Reviewed By: Kera Sheden On: May 11, 2005 20:46 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 9 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Kukuku, great lemony goodness in this fic. I salute you.
| Title: The Herb
Reviewed By: Megan Consoer [MediaMiner Member] On: May 08, 2005 22:35 CDT
Comment/Review:
I really like this story alot. Can you write some more chapters?
| Title: FFARG
Reviewed By: Broken Visage [MediaMiner Member] On: April 30, 2005 18:12 CDT
Comment/Review:
you have a good grasp of the PWP, but your writing needs a lot of work. For one, your grammar skills could use a refresher. Also, you need to find better language for most of your descriptions--which are nicely descriptive; your language could be seen as offensive by many people, especially such things as saying Kagome is Inuyasha's "bitch." The characters are terribly OOC and, like the previous reviewer said, acted like bad porn stars. You also have a tendency to use childish and inappropriate language in many of the descriptions, which is rampant throughout the lemon itself. And yes, mentioning size is tacky. Might I also suggest you ask around for information about people's first times? Kagome, for one, would hurt from the experience. Thank you for submitting to FFARG :-)
| Title: FFARG review
Reviewed By: roku kyu [MediaMiner Member] On: April 30, 2005 14:31 CDT
Comment/Review:
This story started out well. I liked the character interactions, especially their inner thoughts and personal doubts. You did have a significant number of word misusage, not detectable by spell-check: i.e. emitted instead of admitted, it's instead of its, hopping instead of hoping--so you might consider a beta reader. The descriptions of the hot spring were also very nice and vivid, and all was going well, until...the sex scenes. Not that they weren't descriptive. The problem is that you lost sight of the characters and made them severely OOC. An aphrodisiac might lower inhibitions, but it won't change personalities. During the orgy, the participants talked and acted like bad porn movie actors. I didn't see anything of the vulnerability and insecurities that define Kagome, Sango, Miroku, and Inuyasha, which made the declarations of love at the end unconvincing. Not to mention that the use of bathroom wall slang by the third person voice took away serious literary potential. Use the proper names for body parts if you want to avoid unintentional comedy, and don't ever mention size; that's just tacky. You might try incorporating your skill at characterization into the CENTER of the sex scene, trying to imagine how each personality might react to overwhelming feelings of passion in a way other than "I wanna f*@k you, bitch!" This fic has potential. I feel that if you really work at it, you can polish its roughness into real erotica.
| Title: ..
Reviewed By: DessertPhoenix On: April 14, 2005 17:58 CDT
Rating(s):Enjoyment Factor: 9 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
OMG, you're really at good at writing this kind of stuff... This is HOT HOT
| Reviewed By: Suewaki On: April 11, 2005 16:17 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 5 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 8 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 3 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 3 of 10
Overall Rating: 4 of 10 Comment/Review:
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| Reviewed By: Saki =) On: April 10, 2005 16:11 CDT
Rating(s):Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Holy freak, it's really hot in here. I will never think about stew the same way again. Loved the ending, it was hilarious! =D
| Reviewed By: Niffy [MediaMiner Member] On: March 30, 2005 16:24 CST
Rating(s):Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Comment/Review:
that was.. omg! really really really really HOT write more pleaseeee!!!! omg did the room just get hotter? oh boy i want more please. hahaa keep up the good work and update soon!!
| Title: ^_~ Great one-shot!
Reviewed By: Kera Sheden On: March 23, 2005 02:36 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
This was really fun to read. You had me laughing alot as well. That sly Kaede, giving them drugs. ^_^ Your writing is great, keep it up! ~Kera Sheden
| Reviewed By: Animeluver1368 [MediaMiner Member] On: March 13, 2005 21:19 CST
Rating(s):Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Very good skills with the lemons and the ending was hilarious. I loved it.
| Title: hot
Reviewed By: A anime fan girl [MediaMiner Member] On: March 12, 2005 16:56 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
hot, hot, hot, that's all i can describe it. i showed it to my boyfriend, now we always give eachother strange looks whenever my mom makes us stew for dinner whenever he ate at my house. She did once and only once, for some reason. The strange part is, that when we first tried it, it was delicious and then later, we started to feel a little strange, and... well, it started to get hot. Heh, then my older sister told me that she and her boyfriend spiked it by using some powder from crushed viagra pills. I was like 'O my gosh, you b****!'. This is the most strangest henati one-shot ive ever read 'cause it was so like that one, strange night. *sigh* it's a good thing that we had enough control to use condomns, or else... uh, sorry for that VERY embarrassing story! Keep wirting more stories like this. *blushes* Good thing im black so no one can hardly see me blushing lol
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