| "Advent Children" Reviews/Comments [ 36 ] |
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Reviewed By: Trisha [MediaMiner Member] On: August 14, 2005 20:38 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
OH WOW AWESOME!
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Reviewed By: DBZ-FAN-JESS [MediaMiner Member] On: August 14, 2005 18:34 CDT
Comment/Review:
That was an awesome chapter... I love his contemplation over his feelings for his mate and son, and then his thoughts on his upcoming child. I like how you showed his thoughts on the situation and his reactions to his mate when he finally saw her. You did an awesome job with this chapter and I loved the end and the little scene with trunks... poor mortified child finding his parents messing around, the treasure hunt comment was priceless... ^_^ Great job, cannot wait for the next chapter. Lovely little interlude into Bra...
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Reviewed By: Ember [MediaMiner Member] On: August 14, 2005 17:09 CDT
Comment/Review:
Absolutely fantastic! You have new fan. Vegeta's insights in this all rang true to me (no mean feat there) and the narrative is so clean and fresh - detailed and articulate, and yet without being bogged down. Good stuff.
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Reviewed By: Elenek [MediaMiner Member] On: August 14, 2005 16:57 CDT
Comment/Review:
That was great. I liked how Vegeta pictured the rules he would lay down for his daughter. Those went out the window huh? The ending to the lemmon had me laughing out loud. Thank you for writing. -El-
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Reviewed By: Lord_Vegeta [MediaMiner Member] On: August 14, 2005 13:39 CDT
Comment/Review:
Well finally updated as requested and no, I won't be giving any spoilers *smirks*
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Reviewed By: Elenek [MediaMiner Member] On: June 29, 2005 17:31 CDT
Comment/Review:
This is beautiful! The prologue was clenching. The dream hed me worried there. The idea the Majin had taken over Vegeta's personality is frightening. I must wonder if that is some amount of foreshadowing there or not. Don't suppose you'll tell me huh? Can't say I blame you. I wouldn't either. It works well with the whole keeping the reader interested thing. The following did a fantastic job as contrasting who he could have been with who he is right now. The beast within is a might disturbing. There is that whole foreshadowing thing again. I would also like to say that I liked the imagery you included in this. It's sets the mood of each section wonderfly and is so poetically scripted. I'm looking forward to reading more. I have a funny feeling that you are about to be a person whose writing inspires me to write. Thank You for writing this. -El-
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Reviewed By: Bulma16 [MediaMiner Member] On: June 24, 2005 16:35 CDT
Comment/Review:
Wow, awesome job Vegeta. That dream sequence really threw me and the Prologue gave us a glimpse of a side of Vegeta we don't see too often. Very well written and here's hoping you update soon *grins* ~Claire
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Reviewed By: Lord_Vegeta [MediaMiner Member] On: June 23, 2005 08:55 CDT
Comment/Review:
Taking a moment from my so called "vacation" ( stress level 7 out of 10 at the moment...) by exploiting others' technology. Appreciated you all. Once I get back from this hell hole I'll most likely be pissed enough to get something done... we'll see.
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Reviewed By: miaka16 [MediaMiner Member] On: June 22, 2005 10:54 CDT
Comment/Review:
Great stuff...of course...XP I'm loving the BV development here...it was cool cuz in this chapter the reader can see two sides...Majin Vegeta...and Vegeta's life with Bulma... ^_^
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Title: Advent Children
Reviewed By: maccam [MediaMiner Member] On: June 21, 2005 18:22 CDT
Comment/Review:
One of the best chapters of a story i\'ve read so far. Please update soon Vegeta...
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Reviewed By: DBZ-FAN-JESS [MediaMiner Member] On: June 20, 2005 22:56 CDT
Comment/Review:
Vegeta you did a great job. That was amazing and intense. I loved the dream sequence and the realization for Vegeta that Bulma loves him so unconditionally... the chapter was well done and I loved the little talk about their little girl... a daddys girl of course. Great chapter and I cannot wait to read what you write next. Very good job. Oh and deb *sticks tongue out at her*
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Reviewed By: Lord_Vegeta [MediaMiner Member] On: June 20, 2005 19:44 CDT
Comment/Review:
Indeed it does and who's to say when that pile stops growing, hm? *smirks* But damn that speed bump...so close, yet so very far. You'd think after saving the world all day a saiyan deserves to relax >< *grumbles things under breath*
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Reviewed By: debbiechan [MediaMiner Member] On: June 20, 2005 16:33 CDT
Comment/Review:
Yes! That was intense! As badly as "the dream" thing can be done in fics, here it worked seamlessly. The B/V action was really high caliber--I've always wanted Bulma face to face with the Majin Prince. Thanks for that little interaction--it all rang true to both their characters. Bulma would stand up to him like that and she wouldn't stop loving him--after all, her love stands on a whole galaxy of corpses, doesn't it? And I love the drama of domesticity against the whole evil destroyer of worlds--esp when Vegeta tries to fix his angst with some sex and runs across a speed bump! This is primo! (What the heck am I supposed to call you, huh? Ouji-sama? That doesn't leave too more characters for your review! PV is just shorter). And btw, just to pick on Jess.... your use of the word "unnoticed" was correctin the prologue (take it from the English teacher! Heh heh heh)
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Reviewed By: Lord_Vegeta [MediaMiner Member] On: June 20, 2005 15:40 CDT
Comment/Review:
Appreciated.
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Reviewed By: DBZ-FAN-JESS [MediaMiner Member] On: June 12, 2005 23:24 CDT
Comment/Review:
Hey Peev *better ^_~* You did a great job with this story. This story has started off wonderfully. You have brought your audience in with a wonderful introduction; I liked how dark and mysterious this prolugue was. You have no idea what the future for this fic is and that is what I like. It leaves you guessing and wondering what will happen next You leave the reader waiting for more which is a great way to leave your audience. *sorry for my pms moment earlier... I was irratated and taking it out on the stories I was reading... I probably put some poor pre-teen in tears* I loved the story though and you did a great job with it. I can not wait to see the rest of your work. Cannot wait for your next update *sorry for those of you who may have thought I came off bitchy... ^_~... I was just in a mood that night and may have been a little harsh*
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