| "Practice" Reviews/Comments [ 56 ] |
| Pages (4): [ « ‹ 1 2 3 4 › » ] |
Title: new chapter
Reviewed By: Peacemaker [MediaMiner Member] On: August 22, 2005 10:05 CDT
Rating(s):Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Nice chapter and I can;t wait to see what happened to Asuka. Keep up the good work and update when you have time please.
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Title: Surprised (ch12)
Reviewed By: darkfriend [MediaMiner Member] On: August 21, 2005 22:36 CDT
Comment/Review:
Boy, I didn't see that one coming. Definitely a step in an interesting direction and I'm curious what you'll do with everything now that you've truly broken off from the traditional plotline. Eagerly awaiting your next update.
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Reviewed By: A-Z Mk II On: August 21, 2005 19:28 CDT
Comment/Review:
Well, I'm not sure about the new direction, but good luck. I'll see how it plays out before making more comments.
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Reviewed By: forechunkukee [MediaMiner Member] On: August 21, 2005 18:05 CDT
Comment/Review:
Awesome, good to see that you updated! Interesting chapter, meeting Shimano's mom and all...and that kiss! Good work, I can't help but wonder what manner of trouble Sohryu managed to get herself in now...Awesome, can't wait to see more. d('')b
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Title: ch.11
Reviewed By: Peacemaker(not logged in) On: August 14, 2005 23:19 CDT
Rating(s):Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Another good chapter and it had some nice amount of fluff in it. Keep up the good work and update when you have time please.
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Title: Ch. 11
Reviewed By: darkfriend [MediaMiner Member] On: August 14, 2005 23:06 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Fantastic update this chapter. I particularly liked the contrast of Shinji's guarded interaction with his father and the "heart-on-his-sleeve" moments with Motowa. In almost every other OC fanfic I've read, I was not impressed and felt that the original character could have been omitted for a better story; Your character is already feeling like a canonical Eva character in my mind (minus the mental problems). As previously, excellent work and well worth the wait!
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Reviewed By: jojojellybean On: August 14, 2005 19:49 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 9 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 9 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
awesome ... keep it up
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Title: Nice
Reviewed By: forechunkukee [MediaMiner Member] On: August 13, 2005 21:20 CDT
Comment/Review:
And here I pass judgment. You're definitely one of my favorite authors here. This story has been nothing short of excellant, and is one of the first OC fanfics I've enjoyed in quite a while. Amazing how you are braiding different character's historys into one another. I'm very interested in how Shimano seems to know Ayanami pretty well...wonder what that could mean. This is one of those stories that you can't quite always predict what's going on...but here, that's a good thing. Trust me. Keep it up, I love your work, can't wait to see more. Peace! d('')b p.s - loved the chapter title. Good to see you're sticking as close to Evangelion as possible. Oh, and one more thing. That song is a decent challenge. If you play the piano, look that one up! Peace!
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Reviewed By: dennisud [MediaMiner Member] On: August 11, 2005 18:42 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 9 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 9 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 9 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
A great jaunt and so well written. I really feel for Motowa as a charished character and feel like as she and shini develop their relationship, the storyline will eventually pull them apart. I'm very intrigued with Motawa's friendship of Rei, and how that would change things. As for Asuka she might feel Motowa's a rival for her. She might try to either steal Shinji or berate their relationship. Hope this keeps being as entertaining. dennisud
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Reviewed By: denisud2015 On: August 11, 2005 18:39 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 9 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 8 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
A great jaunt and so well written. I really feel for Motowa as a charished character and feel like as she and shini develop their relationship, the storyline will eventually pull them apart. I'm very intrigued with Motawa's friendship of Rei, and how that would change things. As for Asuka she might feel Motowa's a rival for her. She might try to either steal Shinji or berate their relationship. Hope this keeps being as entertaining. dennisud
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Title: Chs. 7-10
Reviewed By: darkfriend [MediaMiner Member] On: August 09, 2005 23:03 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 9 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 9 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 9 of 10
Overall Rating: 9 of 10 Comment/Review:
As before I see positive progress in the writing style and relationship. I like how you're working in Shinji's friends in this fic so far. Some have mentioned longer chapters would improve the fic. That could be true and while I would like longer chapters, I kinda like the fact that we get another chapter every couple of days or so rather than once every two weeks or so...besides we're still in the exposition stage of the fic so I'm guessing longer chapters will come as needed for the story itself... Great job...and don't force anything.
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Title: Ch 5-10
Reviewed By: forechunkukee [MediaMiner Member] On: August 08, 2005 23:53 CDT
Comment/Review:
Ah jeez, this e-mail bug is killing me...can't believe I missed your last 5 updates...well in any case, awesome job so far, I'm impressed! After "Hot-Flash", things seemed to have cooled a bit, but thats understandable because I can tell you're striving to build a pretty strong relationship between Ikari and Shimano, and I believe thats a good thing because too often lemons turn out to pointless sex (if its well written though, then I don't mind. Check out Dream Machine, awesome PWP because its written out pretty well). I really don't have any complaints about this, chapter length aside, but that makes total sense to me. You just updated 5 times in the past week alone. Keep up the good work here, this looks very promising to me. Peace! d('')b
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Title: Chapter 10
Reviewed By: D.J. On: August 08, 2005 13:02 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 9 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 9 of 10
Overall Rating: 9 of 10 Comment/Review:
Seems pretty good. I would like some longer chapters though. And also how would Kensuke know about Gendo's mannerisms? He doesn't work at Nerv and hasn't ever seen him.
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Title: Chapter 10
Reviewed By: WarpWizard [MediaMiner Member] On: August 08, 2005 12:16 CDT
Comment/Review:
You should change the name of the fic to "Parkour Training". Just kidding. :)
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Reviewed By: A-Z Mk II On: August 08, 2005 05:08 CDT
Comment/Review:
So far, so good. The chapter length is slowly but steadily dropping, and the focus seems to be shifting away from 'hentai', but that is not necessarily a bad thing. Good work, and I look forward to more.
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