Ai No Kusabi Fan Fiction ❯ Falling Into the Darkness ❯ Taking Over Me #2 ( Chapter 5 )

Taking Over Me…Part 2

Have you forgotten all I know and all we had?

You saw me mourning my love for you and touched my hand.

I knew you loved me then…

You've abandoned me again for the Blondie…I feel it in my soul, or that which I used to think of as my soul. The night you told me that you had been his Pet was the night you tore my life to shreds. He is everything we swore we'd never be, and knowing that you licked Iason's boots for three years and then decided you couldn't be away from him destroyed my faith in myself. It matters little that you claim to have gone back for my sake. I want you back, and I'll do whatever it takes to get you away from that bastard…whatever it takes.

When you returned to me, I took you back willingly. No one could have been less surprised than you, I think. You rightly assumed that I would take you back into my arms, no questions asked. Why should I have thought to do otherwise? I believed in you. Call me a fool, but I *still* believe in you. That's why I'll get you back and make you want to stay.

We had so much together before you left the first time. A strong gang followed your every whim, but even Bison was destroyed because of your involvement with that Blondie. When I told the others what I was planning to do, they laughed and said I should just tell you to get fucked. Oh, I forgot…you did. There's nothing he can do that I cannot...except perhaps, hold you dangling over his head. Personally, I don't see the attraction-that's why I intend to break his hold over you once and for all. I need you to live yet again. He, on the other hand, does not.

Have you forgotten all we were to each other? I gave you my all, and you took it lovingly. I gave you my all, and you took it roughly. I gave you my all, and you took it willingly. As I took everything you gave to me…lovingly…roughly…willingly. Most of all, I took it willingly. Now you have thrown me away, but I still need you.

Now I have a perfect plan. The others from Bison think I've lost all reason, but I know instinctively that my plan will work. After I get a few more things from the Market, I'll be ready. Then I'll lay in wait until the perfect moment and *take* you back.

I know your Blondie will be furious, and I'm ready for his wrath. I know just the place for us to hide from his all-seeing eyes. Once I get you safely ensconced there, I have made arrangements to get him out of our lives permanently. We hide out until the heat blows over, then we move back to Ceres and take up where we left off. It might take a little bit of time to accomplish everything, but everything should work swimmingly as the place I chose for us to live in the interim should be proof against whatever homing devices he has defiled you with.

We get you there, we remove the Pet ring, and you'll be free. You cannot be happy with him. I've seen you in the Market, your countenance still proud, but somehow you are not the same Riki I held in my arms. When I get you back, we'll love the memory of Iason and his life away from your thoughts. I know the plan will work. It cannot fail.

My obsession with you…for I fully acknowledge my love is an obsession…is every bit as great as the Blondie's. He should know he cannot hold you as I can. We grew up in this life in Ceres. We understand the reasons behind our feelings. He can only see his needs; he was never programmed to accept the needs of another. For that reason alone, he is not worthy of you.

Luke asked me again last week why I don't just let you go. I told him that if you hadn't loved me you wouldn't have looked at me that way that night. We were both angry, and you knew that once my anger cooled I would learn to accept the fact that Iason made you enjoy the things he and his ilk taught you while you were in his clutches. Anything you need to feel, you know I am more than willing to learn, if it's only for you.

I know you thought I slept when you walked out the door with your pack over your shoulder. I heard you return and believed you decided to come back to me for good. I planned to apologize the next morning, so I rolled over and drifted back to sleep. Your touch gently brought me up from my velvet dreams, and I opened my eyes as you turned to leave. The look in your eyes was one of sadness and resignation. The way your fingertips glided over my skin as if memorizing my looks told of your love for me. You don't give that look to anyone who you intend to hate.

I wanted to beg you to stop before you closed my door behind you. However, I was paralyzed with the pain of watching you walk out of my life that way once again. You loved me, but still you left. I still don't understand, but I have been trying. The more I think about it, the more I need you. I dream of you and you take my breath away as you teach me new ways to please you. I need you in order to live…without you I am lost once again.

I will see you again, Riki, and when I do, I'll make you love me like you used to…like I believe you still do. Then life will mean even more than it did when we first loved.

I'll do anything just to have you back. When I get you back this time, I'll never give you reason to leave me again. No matter what it takes, I'll have that which I need to survive. I love you, Riki. I need you more than air. I'll find you and bring you home.

Your entire essence has taken me over. I want to do the same for you…if you'll only let me.