Azumanga Daioh Fan Fiction ❯ The Tao of Osaka-sensei ❯ The Girl Has (A) Class ( Chapter 2 )

THE TAO OF OSAKA-SENSEI

An Azumanga Daioh Fanfiction

by Michael Hopcroft

 

Episode 2: The Girl Has (A) Class

 

DISCLAIMER: I do not own Azumanga Daioh. That is owned by Kiyohiko Azuma and his representatives, ADV Manga and ADV Films.

 

Meet Osaka-sensei

 

Satori Kimura got into her seat. Her first day of high school. How bad could it be? Everyone at her middle school had told her she should have chosen another school, that going to the school where her father taught would be a bad idea. But she had persevered, her grades and exams had been spot-on, and here she was sitting in her class.

 

“Hey, Sa-chan!” Satori looked up to see one of her friends from middle school,Aoi Yuroshi, walk into the room. “So we're in the same class. Glad to see a friendly face!”

 

“Yeah, great to see you too, Aoi! I just wish I wasn't getting so many odd looks from the senpais.”

 

“Odd looks? What do you mean?”

 

“Well, not at first sight, But whenever I introduce myself the seniors back away, like I was some kind of leper. It really creeps me out! I just hope the teachers don't do the same thing, or I'll be in real trouble.”

 

“Hey, if you'd had leprosy I would have caught it long ago. Buck up! Anyway, the teacher's coming.”

 

A young woman in a not-very-formal suit walked into the room. “Someone left the door open.” she said. “I'd better close it.” The woman then closed the door and walked up to the podium.

 

One of the boys called out “Stand!” The class stood, seeming to have found its way into some sort of order. “Bow!” the boy called, and the class bowed.

 

“That's awful nice of ya'.” the woman said.

 

“Sit.”, the boy said, and everyone took their seats.

 

The woman took out a piece of chalk and wrote out two names on the board, side by side. One was “Ayumu Kasgua”, and the other, next to it, was simply “Osaka”.

 

“Osaka?”, Satori asked herself. “What does Osaka have to do with anything?”

 

“Hello, and welcome to the first day of high school,” the woman said. “I'm your homeroom teacher for Class 1-4. My name's Ayumu Kasuga. Nice to meet'cha.” She then looked around at the students. “I don't have a lot to say right away on the first day, so I'll start by takin' the roll. Unless there are any questions....”

 

Aoi raised her hand. “Sensei, why did you write “Osaka” on the board? Are you from Osaka?”

 

“Yeah. In fact, for years now everyone's been calling me “Osaka” because I came from Osaka. All my friends call me that, all the other teachers call me that. I have a feelin' that someone's gonna start asking for, for....” she looked at the board and sighed, “for Kasuga-sensei, and I'll end up lookin' around wonderin' who the heck they're talkin' about. So I figured that if you guys called me Osaka too there'd be less confusion. Now, let me take roll. Kahata?”

 

“Here.”

 

“Kimura.”

 

Satori raised her hand. “Here.”

 

“Didn't you used to be a little girl in a photograph with Kimura-sensei a few years back?” Osaka asked.

 

Satori blushed. “Well, I imagine there had to have been some pictures taken, but I don't see....”

 

“I knew it, you're Kimura's daughter! He showed me your picture when I was a second-year.”

 

“He did?” now Satori was seriously embarrassed.

 

“He was a really proud father. Still is, in fact. I'm really pleased to meet'cha!”

 

“S...sure.”

 

“Fine. Let me move on. Kubato?”

 

“Here.”

 

Family Matters

 

Homeroom had mainly consisted the first day of organizing the class. Satori was surprised that she had been elected one of the Class Representatives, despite the fact that she had not especially angled for the job. Her assistant was a tall, cute boy named Hiroshi Jigobuchi, and she wondered if they would get along. Osaka-sensei, as she found herself calling her new homeroom teacher, had handled things nicely, albeit somewhat distantly. Shew wondered if this was a person she could deal with.

 

“Sensei,” she said walking up to Osaka as the period ended, “Can we talk for a moment? Something is worrying me.”

 

“Already? It's only the first day of high school, Satori-san. Why are you worried?”

 

“Well, it's the seniors. They're being mean to me for some reason, and I can't think of anything I could have done to them.”

 

“You'd never met any of 'em, had you? No, of course you hadn't. It could be hazing, that still happens sometimes.”

 

“I don't think so. They just start avoiding me when they hear my name.”

 

Osaka's face dawned with sudden realization. “I know! It must be that you're Kimura's daughter, and they don't want to deal with you because of your dad.”

 

“What's wrong with my dad?” Satori asked. “He's a good dad. And I'm sure he's a good teacher!”

 

“Any teacher's kid is gonna have that problem, but there are quite a few students here who don't like your father very much.”

 

“If I don't want to run into people who don't like my father, who should I avoid then?”

 

“People in skirts. Your father likes high school girls a lot, and sometimes he's been known to say and do things that upset them. I don't think he means to, but it happens that way.”

 

“Really? You're not making this up to make me feel bad?”

 

“Why would I want you to feel bad, Satori-chan? I don't think your father's a bad man. And as far as I know he hasn't actually done anything totally improper. It's just that - well, sometimes people come across as odd to other people, ya' know? Like people tellin'; me I'm weird.”

 

Satori stood back. “You're not weird, sensei!”

 

“Of course I'm weird. Everyone tells me I'm weird, and these are people who have no reason to lie. But you know what, Satori-chan? It's OK. As long as I can do what I need to and want to, it's OK that people think I'm weird. And sometimes it can be fun.”

 

“Fun....”

 

“Now your father sometimes says and does strange things, but he's a good teacher. And he's been a good father to you and a good husband to your mom, right?”

 

Satori nodded. “Yes, he has. He's always been kind and supportive to both of us. I couldn't ask for better.”

 

“Then that's the image of your dad you want to hold onto, ain't it?”

 

“Yeah - I mean, yes. Yes it is.”

 

“So if the seniors mess with 'ya, walk away from 'em. Maybe have a nice long cry when you get home to get it out of your system, and then put it behind 'ya and go on with your day. If ya' stick to your real friends and never let 'em down, they'll stick to you and you'll be fine. I know this because that's how I got through this school. You can do it too.” Osaka noticed that Satori's eyes were welling up with tears. “Was that the wrong thing?”

 

Then Osaka noticed that Satori, despite the tears, was smiling. “Thank you, sensei! Thank you! That's the nicest thing a teacher has ever said to me! I won't forget it!”

 

Osaka smiled. “I'd better go to my next class,” she said. “Your father has you guys next period for Classics. Good luck. See ya later!” Osaka left the room, and Aoi placed a gentle hand on Satori's shoulder.

 

“What was all that about?” she asked.

 

“I'm going to love this school,” Satori said, “even if it kills me!”

 

Lunchtime Double-Entendres

 

Osaka took a seat at her desk in the Teacher's Lounge for lunch period. “I am tired,” she said to no-one in particular. “I wish I could take a nap. But then I wouldn't get to eat lunch. But then, if I eat lunch, I won't have time for a nap and I'll be really tired by the end of the day. Decisions, decisions....”

 

Yukari walked up to her desk. “Hey, Osaka-sensei. How's your first day so far?”

 

“Not bad”, Osaka replied, suppressing a yawn. “But I sure am tired. And it's only half the day.”

 

“Tired, eh? You sure you're cut out for this line of work, Osaka?”

 

“Well, yeah, I think I am.”

 

Nyamo came up and placed a can on Osaka's desk. “Here you go, Osaka, “ she said, “I figured you needed a pick-me-up so I got you a cola from the machine. And here's one for you, Yukari.”

 

Yukari grabbed the drink before Nyamo could set it down. “You're being so nice to her, Nyamo. Why?”

 

“Why not? You should be nice to her too, Yukari. Just think of the perks you can get.”

 

“Perks? What perks?”

 

“Just think of the inside video game info you can get, because Osaka's boyfriend works in the industry! I know you love having that kind of an edge.”

 

Osaka chipped in. “That's true. Taka gets a lot of the new equipment before it's released, so he can test it and program for it. And he gets to play with it afterwards, even with me.”

 

Yukari pepped up. "So, you two play games together?"

"Yes, all the time. Taka's really good."

"What's your favorite game?" Yukari asked. "Final Fantasy? Devil May Cry?"

"I don't know about a favorite, but I really like Hide the Sausage."

A moment of silence followed.

 

Osaka met her senpais' blank, shocked stares with a quizzical look. "You've never played Hide the Sausage? I'll show you..."

'NO!" cried Yukari and Nyamo, for once in one voice.

"You've never played...."

Yukari cried out "I'll have you know that I am a highly skilled Hide the Sausage player!” She then noticed Nyamo glaring at her and added “I just don't get a lot of practice."

"Then you and Nyamo can play."

"No we can't! We don't have the equipment!"

"I do, it's at home right now. After work we can all play together."

"WHAT?"

"It's a really fun game. You're in a castle, and vicious Glorbs are trying to steal all the food. You have to conceal all the sausages in places where the Glorbs can't find them. But don't use the alcoves on level twelve -- the curtains don't work." Osaka looked at Yukari, who was giving Osaka one of the oddest stares imaginable. "What?"

"WHO makes a video game and calls it HIDE THE SAUSAGE?"

"You mean it's trademarked already?"

Nyamo shrugged her shoulders. "What other games do you like, Osaka."

"Ride 'Em Cowgirl."

Yukari smirked. "Oh, is that a rodeo game where you're competing to see if you can stay on the bull longest?"

"No, that's when I sit on Taka's...."

"STOP RIGHT THERE!"

 

Osaka shrugged her shoulders. “OK. Say, why is Nyamo turning purple?”

 

“You have to ask?”

 

Day's End

 

The last period of the day was over. Osaka had decided to go straight to the teacher's room to do the end-of-the-day paperwork. She found herself wondering where Yukari was off to. Then she saw Kimura at his desk, also working on papers. She decided to have a word with him. “Kimura-senpai?” she asked. “Can I have a word with ya?”

 

Kimura pulled out his chair to face her. “You were cuter in high school, you know.” he said. “What can I do for you?”

 

“You know your daughter is in my homeroom, don'tcha?”

 

“Yes. Is she going to be all right?”

 

“I think so, but I wanted to talk to you about it. She's been getting trouble from her senpais, you know. People makin' fun of her and not wantin' to be around her.”

 

“Why? Is it because of me?” Kimura looked up at Osaka expectantly. Osaka did not answer right away. An awkward moment passed. Kimura turned his head away. “If you don't know what to say, Osaka-san, then I think it is about me.”

 

“I don't know what to say because I'm not sure.....”

 

“Osaka, I'm a man who says what's on his mind. And sometimes it gets me into trouble. But my family... my family.... You understand I'd rather tear my heart out than hurt Satori-chan? There's nothing in the world more important than her to me. Nothing. Maybe I shouldn't have had her come to this school. Maybe I should have asked her to go somewhere else, for her sake.”

 

Osaka sat down beside him. “Kimura-senpai, my dad wasn't a high school teacher. But I can tell you that if he had been, I would have wanted to go to the school where he taught. I would have felt so proud to see him at the podium giving his lesson, and to say to myself “My dad is teaching me. He's doin' what he's always done for me.”.And I would have thought to myself how wonderful it was that I had a father with the courage to do that. I think that in spite of all the taunting that's how Satori feels. I think that's why she wanted to come to our school.” She handed Kimura a tissue, as she could tell he was about to cry. “Don't worry, senpai. I'll look after your daughter. She is my student, after all. But you should tone things down, for her sake. The only reason people think you're perverted is that you act like one, even thought you're really not.”

 

“But I like high school girls a lot, Osaka I really like them.”

 

“All you do is look. Remember that girl you were fixated on when I was a student here, Kaori? Your attentions really creeped her out, but you never laid a hand on her. You had a lot of power over her and the other girls that you could have done horrible things with if you'd been a real pervert, or a real bad person. But you didn't. Kaori said so herself.”

 

“How is Kaorin, anyway? After graduation I never heard a word - and based on what you just said I probably never will.”

 

“Kaori's fine. She never did land her “Miss Sakaki”, but she and Chihiro are doing well. They're junior partners in an interior design firm now, and roommates. They're quiet about it, but I'm pretty sure they're a couple now too.”

 

“Is that so? Does that mean I drove Kaorin away from men completely?”

 

“It doesn't work that way, but then again I'm pretty much straight so I wouldn't know. Anyway, Kimura-senpai, you watch yourself. If everyone takes care, Satori will be fine.”

 

Kimura nodded, still dabbing his eyes with the tissue. Osaka returned to her own desk, only to be met by Yukari.

 

Yukari's Misinterpretation

 

“So, how was the sum total of your first day teaching real classes?” Yukari asked. “Everything you hoped for and wanted? Or would you rather stay home and do the hausfrau bit?”

 

“Teaching's good,” Osaka said, “I'll be fine. And so will my class.”

 

“Any plans?”

 

“Yeah. Taka's picking me up and we're gonna have dinner.”

 

“Oh, you're having dinner tonight?”

 

“I like to have dinner every night. Then we're going to go home and play some games. Then we're gonna go to bed, and eventually we'll go to sleep.”

 

“OK, Osaka, how come a gorgeous young woman like me can't get a date and you get to sleep with a man every night?”

 

“Where else would I sleep? There's only room for the one futon in the apartment, ya know, and I only send Taka to the couch if he's done something really bad.”

 

Yukari suddenly started smirking as a wicked thought crossed her mind. She knew how to put Osaka in her place! “This Taka must be a real geek, mustn't he? An animator for video games, right? He wears thick glasses, doesn't he?”

 

“Well, yeah, he does wear glasses. But they're nice glasses.”

 

“I knew it! Pocket protector, prototypical nerd all the way. He must have been really desperate!”

 

“It's not like that at all, Yukari-senpai! You shouldn't insult people you've never met that way, ya' know! It ain't proper!”

 

“It's OK if it's the truth, and face it, Osaka, if you could land him how great a guy could he be?”

 

“Here!” Osaka said. She was holding up a picture. “Does this guy look desperate?”

 

Yukari took the picture into her hand and looked at it. It was a fairly standard two-shot. On the left was a smiling, happy-looking Osaka On the right was a young man who looked a bit taller than she was, fairly athletic-looking, with a nice face framed by a pair of wire-rimmed glasses with a thin, neatly trimmed mustache. “this - this is Taka?”

 

“He's shaved off the mustache since the picture was taken, but yeah. This was taken on my graduation trip to Okinawa. Not really a honeymoon since we're not officially married, but we did go off together by ourselves and have a great time..”

 

“And this guy, this hunk, he actually wants you? He wants you?”

 

“He wanted me, I wanted him, we got each other. Worked out nice that way. Otherwise the drawing incident would have had a really embarassing ending. Now I'd better do my lesson plans for tomorrow. Don't want to keep Taka waiting at the gate.”

 

Yukari's shoulders slumped. “Yeah, right. Here's the picture back.” She handed back the photograph, which Osaka tucked away. “Lesson plans. Yeah. That's the ticket.” Yukari sat down at her desk. “Damn! Three days ago I was mad that she was even here! Now I'm so jealous I could scream! There must be something wrong with me....” Then a thought sturck Yukari. “Wait a minute.... drawing incident?”

 

TO BE CONTINUED