Dragon Ball/Z/GT Fan Fiction ❯ A Twisted Saiyan Tale ❯ Back to the future! Again! ( Chapter 9 )

A Twisted Saiya-jin Tale: chapter nine, nearing the end, maybe.

 

By: the same person who wrote the last eight chapters

(If you can't remember it after eight chapters you're hopeless.)

 

Disclaimer: I am not Akira Toriyama and own no part of Dragonball or it's affiliated materials except a plastic action figure of what might be Goku or Gohan or anyone else who wears orange in this series. My dog chewed on it. Maybe it's Spiderman or some kind of X-Men toy. Hard to tell now.

 

Warning: Hint of lime, naughty language, warped humor, etc.

 

 

In the previous chapter the joys of parenthood revealed themselves after Bulma and Vegeta's return to 'primitive world'. After a bit of canoodling Bulma decides to spend some time taking samples of the local flora and fauna for biomedical and zoological research and possible cloning. Sadly, though, the fauna samples did not make it back to Bulma's world. Samples of animal tissue looks a lot like meat, and meat looks a lot like lunch to a hungry Saiyan.

 

"Well, it looks like the dodo is going to remain extinct in my dimension, after all."

 

"Naw, Kakarotto will survive. You have a vaccine for that heart virus now."

 

"Vegeta!"

 

"What?"

 

Ahem. After some canoodling and scientific research they finish recharging the ships batteries and prepare for reentry into Vegeta's home dimension.

 

They packed up once more. Checked the ships systems and powered up the

 

engines. The Warthian crystals were fully charged so they decided to be on their

 

merry way. Vegeta strapped little Trunks into his seat. Then he and Bulma took

 

their own seats and strapped in. The ship roared to life and they were once more in

 

non-space and non-time between dimensions. Bulma scanned the monitors.

 

"I think we're getting closer. Now would be a good time brace yourself for re-entry.", she said. And with that Bang! they landed.

 

They surveyed the scene outside. It didn't look like the post apocalyptic

 

dump Vegeta came from. It was tidy and cheerful. They had set down in the

 

middle of a velvety lawn. The faraway buildings were whole and undamaged and

 

well cared for. It was springtime and flowers were in bloom.

 

"Bah, Woman, you made a mistake. This must be a version of 'happy' us world."

 

"I don't think it's going to be so happy."

 

"Nani?"

 

"Vegeta, we just crashed a funeral."

 

"Nani?"

 

"This is a cemetery. Look!.", Bulma pointed to a crowd of people on the other side of the ship. Vegeta followed where she was pointing with his eyes. He looked at the crowd. They were standing around a hole and they seemed somewhat familiar.

 

"Well, let's introduce ourselves to the natives."

 

They hopped out and walked, or in Vegeta's case, swaggered over to the group of mourners. Up close they were even more familiar than before. They appeared to be copies of Bulma and Vegeta and the rest of the Z-senshi at various ages!

 

"Who're you lot?", Vegeta demanded.

 

The group of mourners turned to face them. An old woman with greenish white hair shrieked. "Aaaii!! It's the ghosts of mama and papa!"

 

"Feh, Girl, they aren't ghosts. They're real. They're mama and papa when they were time traveling.", answered an even more elderly woman with whitish aqua hair.

 

"You two look just like my granny.", Bulma exclaimed. Then she added, "And sort of like my mama, too."

 

"We should. We're your daughters. You know. Bula and Camisole. You died yesterday and we're planting you now."

 

"Still a sassy brat, I see.", Vegeta commented.

 

"Hunh.", was the only response Bula made.

 

"You know….its just occurred to me.", Bulma remarked off-hand. "We're late to our own funeral."

 

The young couple looked around the gathering. They had many descendants. Present were their many children. Their children's spouses. Along with grandchildren and great grandchildren. The young couple went back to Capsule Corporation and crashed their own memorial service. They scarfed down the hors d'oeuvres meant for their family and friends. They gossiped with surviving Z-senshi about their demise.

 

"So, how did it happen? Were we battling some evil alien? They seem to show up every other week so the odds are in their favor of winning eventually."

 

"Err, no. I don't believe their were any aliens. Besides, our grandkids handle that sort of thing nowadays.", Krillin said cagily.

 

"Hmm, well was it villains escaped from the HFIL trying to seek revenge?"

 

"Er, no. I don't believe hell has had any prison breaks recently."

 

"How about evil androids? I bet it was evil androids."

 

"Er, no evil androids around except my wife and she suffered a severe case of metal fatigue awhile back and went to that big scrap heap in the sky. Apparently we should have been slathering on a protective coat of WD40 on her."

 

"Well, what did us in? I can't believe it was natural causes. Not me and the Woman at the same time. Who finished us off?", Vegeta was beginning to get angry and Krillin spotted the vein on his temple beginning to bulge. Danger, Danger Will Robinson! He scuttled off.

 

Vegeta's sons, Drawers and Briefs, came hobbling over to him. They both had rusty swords at this time and were stumping around on them like canes. Both had grown the weedy, long hair and beards of 'Ancient Trunks'.

 

"Father, what's wrong?", one old geezer rasped.

 

"Yeah, what's the matter?", the other wheezed out.

 

"HOW. DID. YOUR. PARENTS. PERISH!?", the cranky one yelled.

 

"What?", both elderly offspring asked. One said, "What Prune Danish?" and the other, "Porridge, where?". Time had made them a trifle deaf.

 

"Shoo, go 'way.", their sister Cami said as she joined them. They complied. "I'll tell you."

 

"Yes, brat, tell us how we died so we can save ourselves from our nemesis."

 

"Um, yeah, 'nemesis'.", she said with an eye roll. "Your 'nemesis' is the Kama Sutra. The unabridged edition. With color illustrations."

 

"NANI?"

 

"You croaked performing some bizarre sex position a nineteen-year-old circus contortionist with a python and a bottle of chocolate sauce would break a neck doing.", Bula had joined them and decided to add her two cents.

 

"At our age? Shinjirarenai! I mean, we must be seriously ancient because you, our child, actually look like you qualify as an antique.", Vegeta exclaimed tactlessly.

 

"Furui Manuke!", was Bula's comeback.

 

"Girl, nobody calls the Saiya-jin noh Ouji an 'old jerk'."

 

"Nobody but your wife.", snipped his daughter. "And everybody else."

 

"Break it up you two.", the wife of the other combatant demanded firmly. "Tell us what you mean. We died during sex? At our age?"

 

"That's right, Mama.", said Bula. "Papa died with his boots on. Well, his boots and his gloves.''

 

"And a huge smile.", added Camisole. "Other than that he wasn't wearing a stitch."

 

"We think it was the way the two of you would have wanted to go. Well, maybe Papa would have preferred going in battle, but this way had to at least a close second."

 

"Hmm, I think I could live with it. Along as it wasn't undignified. I didn't lose any face did I?"

 

"Errrr, no, not face.", answered Cami shiftily.

 

"You sure did lose somethin', 'though.", sniggered Bula.

 

Vegeta was about to ask what they were giggling over, but Bulma pulled him away.

 

"Vegeta, we died during a private moment at a very old age. Do you really want details?"

 

Vegeta shuddered as he visualized. "NO!"

 

They bid a final goodbye to their descendants and then gathered up their new son and boarded their ship and took off to find Vegeta's home dimension.

 

This time Bulma began fiddling with knobs and pushing buttons. "Hmmm, I think I see my mistake. This time we should be in your world."

 

With that she yanked down a lever and like a slot machine that after a thousand lemons she finally turned up all cherries. Although they did know where they were, they did know when they were. They were in Vegeta's world.

 

"Still the same old dump."

 

"Yes, but is it your old dump?", Bulma asked. Just then they heard voices. Familiar voices. "Wow, deja vu!"

 

"Shhhhh, Woman.", Vegeta hissed as they got closer to hear what this world's inhabitants were saying.

 

"……treating me like an Easy Bake Oven. I am not a kitchen appliance. I am not your servant or anyone else's. That was a lesson me and #17 taught Dr. Gero, and don't think I won't teach it to you. I …."

 

"Trouble in paradise?", Vegeta interrupted #18's rant at Gohan.

 

They both looked shocked. "Vegeta!", Gohan yelled. "What are you doing back here? I thought you were gone for good!"

 

"I'll bet he found out that this is the best thing going around. I'll bet he decided to come crawling back to beg us for mercy. What? This little trollop wasn't as good as you dreamed and you want to trade her in?", sneered #18.

 

"No, Betsy Wetsy, he doesn't want to trade me in. Only cheap, vinyl artificial blow-up dolls like you get traded in. A real woman can keep a man.", sassed back Young Bulma. #18 lunged for Bulma at this, but Vegeta stepped in front of his bride with his fists raised as Gohan grabbed his girl by the elbows and pulled her back.

 

"BAITA!", she snarled since she was denied the pleasure of killing her opponent.

 

"Right back at you, Barbie!"

 

"Enough!", shouted Gohan. He added warily, "What did you come back for after all these years? You aren't staying here are you?" He looked worried and unhappy at the idea of having Vegeta for a neighbor again.

 

Vegeta thought fast. He was going to just demand they turn over his son, but he saw a way of getting him without a fuss. In fact, he saw a way they would actually beg him to take the brat. Vegeta liked it when his victims begged.

 

"Well, you guessed right. We ARE moving back here. I couldn't stay away from my son for too long. I mean, I want to train him, after all. Naturally, I couldn't leave behind my new family and neglect them."

 

"New family?", asked Gohan and #18 with dawning horror.

 

"As if one Vegeta-spawned brat isn't enough?", asked an incredulous #17. He had walked up when Vegeta made his stunning announcement about moving back. "There are more? More!?"

 

"Hai, we have seven all told. Well, six really, but number seven is well on the way!", Bulma fabricated slightly while she patted her stomach. She liked yanking their chains just as much as Vegeta did.

 

"Urk!", was all Gohan could choke out.

 

Android #18 was rendered speechless with shock and horror. Her brother's eyes simply rolled back up into his head and his mouth began opening and closing soundlessly. He looked like one of the animatronic dolls on the 'It's a small world' ride at Disney Land, but without the annoying soundtrack. Wisps of smoke began to come out of his ears.

 

"URK!!!", Gohan repeated helplessly. "Se-se-sev-sevvvvvv---", he finally began to stutter out.

 

"SEVEN LITTLE VEGETA SPAWN!?", #18 shrieked as she began to recover. "EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK!!!!". She spun around to her paralyzed brother. "This is all your fault! If you hadn't taken up with Old Bulma that brat wouldn't be our problem! But no, oh, no, you just had to jerk Vegeta's chain and take up with his woman! Now not only are we stuck with one Vegeta brat, we're going to be saddled with a WHOLE damn tribe of them! Aaaaagh!!!".

 

Instead of a verbal response, he chose instead a physical response. His ears went popping of his head from a jet of steam. He toppled forward and crashed to the ground like a felled redwood.

 

"Damn it! Do you know how long that's gonna take to fix?", Gohan yelled. "Forever! That's how long!"

 

"Why don't you just get 'me' to fix it?", Young Bulma queried. "She must have some idea about how to fix androids. She is one after all. Well, a Cyborg, anyway."

 

"She can't fix anything! She fell apart years ago. Her transistors corroded. That's why we got stuck with her brat.", snapped #18.

 

Vegeta and Bulma exchanged looks. Things were really going their way. In a few moments Gohan and the Androids would be paying them to take Vegeta's son with them.

 

"Well, I knew she was cheap, but I didn't think she was substandard. Poor Trunks! The little darling must be really attached to you.", Young Bulma said with saccharine sweetness.

 

"Er, no! He doesn't seem to like us at all.", Gohan had recovered. "Could I speak to #18 alone for a minute, please?". He grabbed his sweetheart by the elbow and dragged her behind a rubble pile. Vegeta leaned closer to eavesdrop.

 

"What are you doing? How dare you drag me around like---", snarled an irate #18.

 

Gohan cut her off. "Don't you see? We can get rid of all of them! Vegeta decided to move his family here to be with that little punk! He knew he couldn't take the kid from Cyborg Bulma and #17, because they're too strong for him in a real fight. He was able to get in a few good shots when they were off guard, but not when they are ready for him. Especially since we would have pitched in to help out. He couldn't possibly stand up against all four of us!"

 

Vegeta rolled his eyes and said, "Want to bet on that, punk?", under his breath so they wouldn't hear him. Bulma poked him in the ribs to be quiet.

 

Gohan continued, "Bulma's dead now so Seventeen has no real reason to keep that kid. Especially since he's so Kami-damned awful! I mean, we have a chance to dump him on someone else. We just have to play this right." The pair looked at each other and exchanged looks. The suckers were right were they wanted them.

 

Vegeta leaned over to Bulma and whispered, "The suckers are right where we want them."

 

"Well, where is the little darling? Is he off playing with his little friends?", Bulma asked innocently when they returned.

 

"Little? Oh, right, little. Well, you know that several years have past, so he has had a, um, ah growth spurt recently. He may be a bit cranky due to, uh, er, growing pains. He really is a wonderful young--young teenage person!", #18 tried to think up some positive adjectives to describe the Trunks in question, but failed. She looked desperately over at Gohan.

 

He cleared his throat and thought fast. "Yeeeeees, he is certainly something! Why you should see how he is with his sword! He certainly has a way with his sword!", Gohan drew a deep breath. "Why don't I go run and get him! You can introduce him to his siblings and take a tour of your ship!"

 

Gohan and #18 took off as fast as they could fly.

 

"This is going to be easier than I thought!", Vegeta said rubbing his hands together.

 

"Umm, I hate to mention this, but why do you think they're so hot to get rid of him? If he were a prize they would be trying to keep him.", pointed out Bulma.

 

"Feh, he's a teenager. Raised by robots. He probably needs an attitude adjustment. I'm good at attitude adjustments.", Vegeta smirked and smacked his fist into his palm. "How much chili have you got left?"

 

"Chili? What do you want with that?"

 

"THINK, Woman! My brat is going to be raised with the one we have now as a twin! At some point he must become a kid again on the trip to your dimension!"

 

"Vegeta! We can't just shrink him down to a toddler because we don't like his behavior. Good parents don't do something like that!"

 

"I'm not a good parent."

 

Bulma socked him in the arm at this and was about to berate him when Gohan and #18 arrived back with a familiar looking teenager in tow. They landed and Gohan and #18 hung back nervously. The teenager sauntered forward with a sneer worthy of Vegeta himself plastered on his face.

 

"So these are the 'rents, huh?", he said looking them up and down. "How's it goin', Runt? Long time, no see."

 

"Runt? RUNT!? Boy, keep a civil tongue in your head or it might get ripped out!"

 

"I'd like to see you try it, Yatsu."

 

Vegeta puffed up and turned red. His vein began to bulge alarmingly. "Why you little bast---".

 

Bulma cut him off by grabbing his arm and whispering, "Please don't start a fight with him! He's our son! We want him to like us."

 

Trunks overheard this and sneered even more. "Don't worry, Step Ma, I like you." With that he raked her with an up-and-down gaze. "I like you just fine." His eyes stayed longer than is socially expectable on her chest. "I'd say the silicone content of your chest is higher than my mother had for her whole body. I like that."

 

Vegeta gave a yelp of rage and lunged at his offspring. Bulma had a look of frozen, sickly embarrassment pasted on her face.

 

Gohan slapped his hand over his eyes and sighed, "Great! They'll take off and we'll be stuck with the little baboon forever."

 

As Vegeta and Trunks were trying to beat the holy-HFIL out of each other #18 stepped between them and stiff-armed them apart.

 

Bulma cleared her throat and said with a rictus-like smile painted on her face, "Why don't you two calm down?". She turned to her husband, "Vegeta, why don't I run to the ship and get that chili I made. You know, a special little treat for your boy!".

 

She turned to the teenager with an even wider, phonier smile, "When is your birthday, dear? How old are you? Why don't I make you something special to go with your chili to make up for all the birthdays your papa missed?"

 

They calmed down and stepped apart, but they didn't stop glaring at each other. The teenager followed Bulma toward the ship. After pausing to kick #17, e stopped and leaned against it with his arms crossed trying not to look interested in food.

 

"I'm nineteen."

 

Vegeta smirked, "Changed your tune, hnn?".

 

Bulma merely shot him a 'look' and dashed up the ramp of the ship. She was gone for a long minute. Then she put her head out and shouted, "Come and get it while it's hot!".

 

The teenager swaggered up the ramp and commented to no one in particular, "I bet it tastes as bad as my mom's crap did, but it can't be any worse than the stuff Eighteen serves up."

 

This made the android lunge for him but she was restrained by Gohan. "Shhh, just let it slide. We just have to put up with the little ima'imashii yarou a little longer and then we'll be free forever." She nodded reluctantly. She leaned against a ruined wall with her arms crossed.

 

Inside the ship they heard the creep say, "That's all!? There is only seventeen beans on this plate! Where is the rest of the chili? Not even seventeen beans! More like sixteen and a half!"

 

"Oh, darling, it's haute cuisine! That's why the portion is so small. Eat up and I'll get your birthday, er, I mean reunion cake!"

 

The teen brat made a noise of disgust but could be heard slurping up the tiny portion of chili.

 

While Bulma was pretending to mix some cake batter, the others waited outside. #18 tried to get #17 up on his feet and functioning again, but was failing. Gohan and Vegeta decided to do what all Saiya-jin did when they were bored. Spar. A Whoop! sound was heard within the ship. Gohan and Eighteen looked up.

 

"What was that noise?", Gohan asked perplexed.

 

"Noise?", Vegeta asked innocently. "What noise?"

 

Just then a PPHBBBT! sound issued from the hold. Bulma came running out of the ship choking and gasping. She collapsed in Vegeta's arms. She had a toddler clutched under each arm like a parcel. She dropped them on the ground and gestured to the ship and tried to speak. Her eyes rolled up into her head and she fainted.

 

"Must be a cooking accident! This Bulma isn't much better than the old one at cooking.", Vegeta tried to cover for the Senzu fart's effects. "Ah, ha, ha, ha, ha!"

 

"But she is a little better?", Gohan asked with sudden interest. He hadn't had a decent meal since his mother bought the farm. The only downside to Chichi's death so far. Gohan had to rely on #18 or himself for meals and she refused to cook for him because 'she wasn't his mother, his servant, or a kitchen appliance'. Anytime he had suggested she cook for him she shot back that he should do his own cooking since he was the one doing the eating. Not her.

 

"Maybe I should go in there and see if I can help Bulma clean up the mess.", Gohan offered. He was so hungry even a 'Bulma' meal was beginning to sound good.

 

"Sure, whatever.", Vegeta said while standing over the prostrate Bulma.

 

Gohan rubbed his hands together and ran up the ramp into the ship. Most of the deadlier fumes had aired out but a stench still lingered in the air. Trunks wasn't anywhere to be seen.

 

He choked and said to himself, "Bulma must have made the cake with cabbage! Which isn't actually the worst thing she's put into a cake."

 

He looked around. He couldn't see anything that looked edible in the kitchen. In fact, there wasn't much of a kitchen. Only some cupboards, a table with chairs on either side, small refrigerator, and a microwave and a cappuccino maker with an "out of order" sign on it. Oddly enough, the table had a pile of laundry under it and what looked like sword sticking out of it. The only thing on the table was a large, plastic bowl and a dirty, empty plate and a spoon. He walked over to it and took off the lid.

 

"This is the leftover chili that Bulma made for Trunks, I bet. Hmm, it smells tasty."

 

He stuck the spoon into the bowl and scooped some up. He sniffed. "Definitely edible.", he stuffed the spoon into his mouth. "Yummy! Who knew Bulma actually had a recipe that is good!"

 

In a moment he had slurped up the last dribbles of chili and dabbed his mouth with a napkin, "Too bad there wasn't anymore left! Just like that punk to take it all for himself."

 

Outside the ship Vegeta got Bulma conscious and to her feet. She looked a little green. The two brats sat in the grass and starred at each other. One was very clean with short hair and the other was rather grubby and had long, tangled hair. They both wore only Capsule Corp. logo T-shirts. Eighteen finally gave up on her brother and looked at the children.

 

"So you have twins, huh?"

 

"Yeah, um, sure we do. What about the kid that Cyborg Bulma was supposed to be knocked up with? What happened to her?"

 

#18 sniffed, "She wasn't pregnant. She missed her periods because she was menopausal. There was no daughter."

 

"Change of life in a robot? That's one for the medical record books! Those mood swings must have been pleasant. When you consider what her non-hormonal ones were like.", Vegeta said with a wince. Bulma punched him in the arm yet again. "Ouch!"

 

The android snorted, "Don't even get me started!"

 

Just then they heard a Wheeeeeeee-BOOM! sound come from interior of the ship. Bulma's eyes snapped open wide.

 

"Eeek! I think he must have found the leftover chili!"

 

Vegeta smirked at Android #18 and said, "I think you just lost a boyfriend."

 

"Huh?"

 

Vegeta strolled up the ramp of the ship and entered. A second later he came out holding a dish rag over his mouth with one hand and dragging a small chibi with the other.

 

"Mannequin, say hello to your boyfriend.", Vegeta grinned evilly as he shoved the kid in front of her. "He's half the man he was."

 

"More like a fourth or a fifth!", she cracked with an eye roll. "What happened to him?"

 

"We found some Senzu beans that restore youth. We gave it to the brats and made them children. Your fool of a boyfriend found the leftovers and ate them."

 

Android #18 looked down at the kid she called her main squeeze. She snorted and said, "If you think I'm taking care of you now that this has happened you can just forget it. I am still not your mother, your nanny, or your Easy Bake Oven. You're on your own, monkey boy."

 

With that she reached down and picked up #17 and slung him over her shoulder in a fireman carry. "I'm off to Dr. Gero's to look for a tool box and an owner's manual. Bro isn't likely going to fix himself. So long, losers." She shot off into the air.

 

Vegeta looked at Bulma. "Well, that was easier than I thought. What about the baka's brat?"

 

Bulma looked at Gohan. "Er, young man, do you know who we are?"

 

"You're my papa's friend from when he was a little boy. We met today at Papa's reunion. I don't know who he is."

 

"You don't know Vegeta? How about these two children? Do you remember who they are?"

 

Gohan shook his head. "I don't know who they are. Where is this place? It looks like a battle field. Is it?" His eyes were wide.

 

"It was one a long time ago, but the war is over so don't be scared.", Bulma said as she patted him on the head. "I'll introduce you to these guys. The pointy headed man is Vegeta and the two boys are our sons, Drawers and Briefs. We are here to take you home to your Mama and Papa. How would you like that? And your Grandpa and your uncles! And your other Grandpa. Would you like that?"

 

He nodded 'yes' to this. "I didn't know I had uncles. I didn't know I had more than one Grandpa.", he said. "How did I get to this place? Where are we?"

 

"Er, right! Where and How? Right! This is another dimension. We were doing a little traveling and you must have climbed inside our ship and got carried along with us. Don't worry! We'll soon be home." Bulma had her fingers crossed behind her back. She turned to Vegeta. "Right, darling?"

 

"Feh, whatever, Woman. Let's just get out of here."

 

So they boarded the ship and roared off into the clouds. Boom!!! They were gone for good.

 

Far below their contrail stood two figures looking up at where they disappeared out of sight. One of them sat on a rock surrounded by scattered tools while the other screwed his head back onto his shoulders. The female figure looked down at her male companion.

 

"Well, that's that!" She picked up a power drill and Vrrrrrrr! tightened the bolts on his neck.

 

"Finally! We're alone!" he said. "I thought we'd never get rid of them!" He wrapped his arm around her waist. She dropped the drill on the ground and kissed him.

 

"It's about time!" she agreed. With that they proceeded to do things only siblings on the 'Jerry Springer Show' do together.

 

Far off in the nether realm between time, space, and dimension a blue haired woman turned to her spiky companion.

 

"Vegeta, I've been meaning to ask you…" she said with a frown. "How do robots have siblings?"

 

He raised an eyebrow, "Nani?"

 

"Well, I mean, they aren't born, are they?" This was more comment than question. "How does one have a twin? Or any kind of sibling? Did they roll off the same assembly line together, or what?"

 

"Hunh, never thought about it. It's a good question, 'though.", he answered slowly with a frown creasing his brow.

 

Just then, the grubby 'Trunks' toddled up. "Who him? And him?" He asked as he pointed to the other Trunks and Gohan.

 

"Darling, do you know who I am?"

 

He nodded, "Mama!"

 

Bulma squealed, "Good! Do you know who he is?" She pointed to Vegeta.

 

"Papa!"

 

"Good! Darling, that boy with the lilac-colored hair is your twin. He's your very own brother." Trunks looked a little perplexed.

 

Vegeta pulled Bulma aside. "Are we going to tell them the truth about where they came from?"

 

"We must eventually. Their sister indicated she knew they weren't really twins so they must know."

 

"When they get old enough to ask about our dimension traveling we'll give them an edited version of history, okay?"

 

"Fine.", Bulma agreed. "I'm going to give him and Gohan a bath and try to find some clothes for them. You take care of the other Trunks."

 

He grumbled, "Feh, I need to train. I don't have time for baby sitting."

 

"DO IT!", Bulma yelled. With that she marched the two boys into the bathroom.

 

Vegeta watched the first Trunks for an hour or so and waited for Bulma to emerge with the other brats.

 

She put her head out and yelled, "They're clean, but they need hair cuts! Bring me the scissors." He got up and rummaged in a drawer. He went over to the bathroom and pushed open the door.

 

Bulma looked up at him. "Well, that world of yours wasn't very clean. I went over them with a fine tooth comb and you wouldn't believe what I found!" He looked at the two brats sitting on the edge of the tub wrapped head to toe in towels. The tub was filled with water that was completely brown.

 

"Chichi would have a fit if she saw how much dirt was on Gohan. I can hardly believe he's her son!"

 

The little boy looked pale and gulped. "You won't tell my Mama I got dirty, will you? I don't 'member how I got to that world and got all dirty! It wasn't my fault!"

 

Bulma patted him on the head, "Don't worry. When Chichi sees you she will be so surprised she won't even know what to say. I bet you she won't even ask you if you got dirty."

 

Vegeta sniggered, "Yeah, when she finds out she has a kid she'll say plenty, but it will all be to Kakarotto."

 

"Find out? Why would she need to find out? She's been my mom my whole life?"

 

"Well, er, ummm, yes! Well, Gohan, your mama has ah, uh, amnesia! We'll have to remind her she's married to your papa and she is your mama. But don't worry! We'll fix everything!" Bulma said anxiously and then added under her breath, "I hope."

 

She combed out his hair with styling gel and cut into a bowl cut and toweled it dry. She then handed him to Vegeta, "Get him some clothes. He can't meet his parents naked."

 

"Why not put him in his old ones?"

 

"They're disgusting! Try one of Grandpa Gohan's brown gis. He can wear it like a long kimono."

 

Vegeta grumbled but complied. When he finished dressing Kakarott's spawn he went looking for a clean T-shirt for Trunks #2. Bulma finally carried out a clipped and dried Trunks out of the bathroom.

 

"Well, they are clean and dressed. More or less.", Bulma said with her hands on her hips. "Can you tell which 'Trunks' is which?"

 

Vegeta looked at them side by side. "Brat?" he called out uncertainly.

 

They both looked at him.

 

"Hmm. This is going to be a bit of a problem. That kid of ours said we gave them new names because we wanted a fresh start, but I think it may be because that we couldn't, I mean we can't tell them apart."

 

"Can't tell them apart? Of course I can--" Bulma was about to shriek but stopped. "Er, can you tell them apart?"

 

Vegeta kept staring at the boys. "No. I thought you could."

 

"Well, um, sure, I guess!" She squinted at them. "That one has to be--", she stopped. "No, he is defi--", she pointed to one but paused. "You win.", she said with a shrug.

 

Ha! I lied. This isn't the last chapter. Chapter ten or eleven is the last chapter.