Fan Fiction ❯ The Four Lords ❯ To Find Love Again ( Chapter 17 )
[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]
By: Soulless Wanderer 
To find Brittany Alex will sacrifice his own flesh to bring her back.
Anime/Manga: Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Romance / Hentai / Adventure | Type: Other | Uploaded On: 01.16.2006 | Pages: 1 | Words: 2.0K | Visits: 123 | Status: Completed
To find Brittany Alex will sacrifice his own flesh to bring her back.
Anime/Manga: Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Romance / Hentai / Adventure | Type: Other | Uploaded On: 01.16.2006 | Pages: 1 | Words: 2.0K | Visits: 123 | Status: Completed
"Holly take a meal up to the Lord, he needs to eat something." Shadow said quickly as he walked past Holly not even giving her a second glance.
"Shadow wait. What's wrong?" Holly asked as she chased after him. She grabbed his arm and spun him around so that she could see his face.
"Nothing is wrong. I...I just have a lot to do. The Lord didn't eat anything last night nor did he eat any breakfast. He's been locked in his study all this time and someone should go check on him. Seeing as how you feel so strongly that me and Kiba are wrong, we both thought it would be best if you were to take it up to him." Shadow said softly. Holly immediately knew what was wrong as soon as Shadow spoke.
"Shadow, I'm not mad at you for what you believe, that's silly." Holly replied softly as she looked down at the ground. "I mean, regardless why should you care what I think, its not like you have feelings for me or anything...right?" Holly mentally kicked herself as she saw Shadow's expression go from sad to bitter.
"Yes, or course, that would be silly." Shadow said as he turned around to leave. "That wouldn't be sensible, now would it?"
"Shadow, I didn't know, I'm sorry." Holly mumbled. "Why didn't you ever tell me?"
"Because, I was hoping you would notice, hoping that maybe you would feel the same way. Evidently, you don't. Sorry to bother you." Shadow left with out giving Holly another chance to speak. Holly knew that she had hurt him worst than anyone ever had, she had humiliated him, and she hadn't even meant to. Shadow, how can you know what my heart feels?
Kiba stepped out from behind a pillar as he sadly looked at Holly. "It's not easy, trying to voice your true feelings." Kiba said as he walked towards her. "Now, you can honestly say you know it feels to say one thing, and mean another. I'll talk to Shadow, you take the Lord something to eat, then you can try an correct things between you and Shadow."
"How am I suppose to correct things now?" Holly asked as she twirled around to look at Kiba. He could tell that she was trying hard to remain calm. He knew that dealing with emotions was not one of her strong points.
"Tell him your true feelings, that would be a good start." Kiba said with a smirk as he put a reassuring hand on her shoulder. "Other than that I have no other advice for you. Seeing as how he's in the same predicament, the Lord might be able to offer you what I can not."
"Fine! I'll go take him his damn breakfast if it'll make everyone happy." Holly snapped, even so she couldn't contain a small smile as she looked at Kiba. "Do you really think he likes me?"
"Go give the Lord his breakfast, then you can ask stupid questions." Kiba said with a laugh as he walked off in the direction that Shadow went. Holly shook her head softly as she hurried to the kitchen to grab Alex something to eat. As soon as the cooks finished the meal Holly went up to Alex's bedroom and knocked on the door.
"My Lord? I brought you something to eat." Holly said to announce her presence. When she didn't get a reply she cautiously walked into his room. She noted that the bed was still made and nothing in the main part of the bedroom looked as if it had been touched since the maids cleaned it. Holly suspiciously wandered around the room until she came to the study door. She could see a faint light beneath the bottom of the door as she slowly cracked the door open. What she saw took her breath away. Alex was sitting in his chair, his hands rested in front of his face his eyes open, as if he was deep in thought. What startled Holly was the fact that Alex's eyes were completely white and the faint light was radiating off of his body. He was extremely pale and Holly could smell a lot of her Lord's blood in the room, which made even her worry about him.
Holly almost dropped the tray of food as she ran towards Alex. "My Lord!" Holly called as she set the tray on his desk and tried to get him to snap out of his trance. The faint aura around Alex dispersed as Alex's eyes took on their normal color. He shook his head slightly as if to regain his bearings as he stared confused at Holly. Once he regained his senses his look became stern.
"Holly wha the hell are you...." Alex was cut off in mid sentence as he turned away from Holly and coughed up a large amount of blood. Holly stared in shock as Alex's shaking hands reached for a cloth that was already stained with much blood. Alex wiped the blood from his lips as he breathed deeply to regain his composure before looking back at Holly. "What are you doing here?"
"Well I was bringing you your breakfast, but evidently I need to bring you more than that. Hold on and I'll go get some herbs for your bleeding." Holly said as she turned to leave.
"Herbs, bandages, magic, nothing will heal what is wrong with me. Besides, I'm fine." Alex replied softly as he closed his eyes again and looked as if he was preparing to continue what he was doing before Holly entered.
"My Lord, what are you saying? Better yet, what are you doing?" Holly asked as he turned to face him. He looks as if he's already dead. What the hell has happened to him in only a short amount of time?
"If I tell you, will you leave me the hell alone?" Alex asked visibly annoyed by her presence.
"Yes my Lord." Holly replied quickly. He looks so tired, I can barely believe it. He didn't sleep any last night, that's obvious, but still it shouldn't have drained him this much. I can see why Kiba felt sorry for him, he does look pathetic.
Alex sighed as he rested his chin on his two hands and looked at Holly with glazed eyes. "Fine then. What I'm doing is using a spell, a very dangerous one, and partially forbidden one. It casts an astral projection of myself which allows me to move quicker, cover more ground. It’s the fastest way I know of finding out where in the hell those mages sent her."
"Dangerous? Forbidden? Why are you doing this?" Holly asked, still not sure what to think. Alex actually smiled at her as he thought about his answer.
"I messed up. I allowed my pride to go before my heart something that I'm regretting. I lost the person that was most precious to me because I was too blind to see that I truly did care about her. I was so wrapped up in wanting to keep her safe that I lost sight of what was really important. Brittany could've cared less who's after her, just as long as I was with her. I didn't realize that until it was too late. Now I'll be damned if I allow anything to happen to her before I can make things right." Alex's words had the same effect on Holly that they had on Kiba. In Alex's eyes, Holly could see that he had lost all hope, but in his words was something that Holly never thought she would hear. Every word he spoke was full of remorse, and full of love.
"M-my Lord." Holly stammered as she looked at him. "If you care so strongly about her, if you truly do love her, then you need to eat and get some rest. You won't do her much good if you kill yourself trying to find her."
"I told you, I'll be fine. Now I believe you said you'd leave me alone once I told you what I was doing." Alex said as he motioned towards the door.
"No, I'm not leaving until you either eat or go to bed." Holly insisted. "You won't be any use to her if your dead."
"Holly for crying out loud I told you I'm fine!" Alex argued. "There's no point in sleeping, if she can stay up three days to watch over me the least I can do is go a night without sleep."
"Yes, but at least she ate something. Even you need to eat especially if using that spell drains so much out of you." Holly continued as she glared daggers at Alex.
"There's no point in me eating either. Anything I'd eat at this point would just taste like blood, so there's really no point in me trying to eat." Alex replied softly. "I don't particularly find the taste of blood that appeasing. Now that I've said this, I don't believe there's any reason for you to stay here."
Holly nodded slightly and turned to leave. When she reached the door she stopped and turned back towards Alex. "My Lord, I know now that you really do care about her. I am sorry for doubting you. There are some things about love that I still need to learn. Still, Kiba, Shadow, and myself know that there is something you are not telling us or her. Something that she needs to hear. We know there is another reason for her being here, its just I am the only one that will say it to your face. Kiba thinks of you as his son and doesn't want to believe that you could deceive her, he cares about you too much to admit it. Shadow, well...you now him, he wouldn't dare go against you, he's too sweet to. I neither care too much about you, nor am I sweet, that's why I am able to say this."
"Holly, before you continue and overstep your boundaries know this. I have no intention of hurting her again, nor do I have any intention of keeping things from her. Don't you think it might be possible that if I have kept something from her it might be for her own good? Now, I suggest you leave me be and go talk to Shadow." Alex said with a knowing smirk throwing Holly off guard.
"What do you mean by that?" Holly asked as she mentally kicked herself for mentioning Shadow.
"Let me give you some advice that I've learned the hard way. Don't hide your feelings. If you care about someone tell them. Love comes at a price, but its worth the pain if but for a moment that person you care about with all your heart is with you." Alex said in a soft voice that was filled with pain. Holly knew in an instant that Alex was lost in memories of him and Brittany, and it wasn't long before he had to look away as he mentally shoved back unshed tears. Holly nodded towards Alex as she whispered.
"Thank you." With that Holly slipped out of Alex's study with one thought on her mind. Shadow, I'm going to make things right. You and Kiba were right, he loves her. That's painfully obvious. All this time I thought everyone else was blind, not it seems as if everyone else could see what I could not. Still, I fear my Lord is going to hurt her once again. Not telling her his true feelings is what got him in this mess. Keeping secrets from her, especially ones that directly involve her, I hope he knows what he's doing. Now I have my own confessions to make. My own secrets to reveal.
"Shadow wait. What's wrong?" Holly asked as she chased after him. She grabbed his arm and spun him around so that she could see his face.
"Nothing is wrong. I...I just have a lot to do. The Lord didn't eat anything last night nor did he eat any breakfast. He's been locked in his study all this time and someone should go check on him. Seeing as how you feel so strongly that me and Kiba are wrong, we both thought it would be best if you were to take it up to him." Shadow said softly. Holly immediately knew what was wrong as soon as Shadow spoke.
"Shadow, I'm not mad at you for what you believe, that's silly." Holly replied softly as she looked down at the ground. "I mean, regardless why should you care what I think, its not like you have feelings for me or anything...right?" Holly mentally kicked herself as she saw Shadow's expression go from sad to bitter.
"Yes, or course, that would be silly." Shadow said as he turned around to leave. "That wouldn't be sensible, now would it?"
"Shadow, I didn't know, I'm sorry." Holly mumbled. "Why didn't you ever tell me?"
"Because, I was hoping you would notice, hoping that maybe you would feel the same way. Evidently, you don't. Sorry to bother you." Shadow left with out giving Holly another chance to speak. Holly knew that she had hurt him worst than anyone ever had, she had humiliated him, and she hadn't even meant to. Shadow, how can you know what my heart feels?
Kiba stepped out from behind a pillar as he sadly looked at Holly. "It's not easy, trying to voice your true feelings." Kiba said as he walked towards her. "Now, you can honestly say you know it feels to say one thing, and mean another. I'll talk to Shadow, you take the Lord something to eat, then you can try an correct things between you and Shadow."
"How am I suppose to correct things now?" Holly asked as she twirled around to look at Kiba. He could tell that she was trying hard to remain calm. He knew that dealing with emotions was not one of her strong points.
"Tell him your true feelings, that would be a good start." Kiba said with a smirk as he put a reassuring hand on her shoulder. "Other than that I have no other advice for you. Seeing as how he's in the same predicament, the Lord might be able to offer you what I can not."
"Fine! I'll go take him his damn breakfast if it'll make everyone happy." Holly snapped, even so she couldn't contain a small smile as she looked at Kiba. "Do you really think he likes me?"
"Go give the Lord his breakfast, then you can ask stupid questions." Kiba said with a laugh as he walked off in the direction that Shadow went. Holly shook her head softly as she hurried to the kitchen to grab Alex something to eat. As soon as the cooks finished the meal Holly went up to Alex's bedroom and knocked on the door.
"My Lord? I brought you something to eat." Holly said to announce her presence. When she didn't get a reply she cautiously walked into his room. She noted that the bed was still made and nothing in the main part of the bedroom looked as if it had been touched since the maids cleaned it. Holly suspiciously wandered around the room until she came to the study door. She could see a faint light beneath the bottom of the door as she slowly cracked the door open. What she saw took her breath away. Alex was sitting in his chair, his hands rested in front of his face his eyes open, as if he was deep in thought. What startled Holly was the fact that Alex's eyes were completely white and the faint light was radiating off of his body. He was extremely pale and Holly could smell a lot of her Lord's blood in the room, which made even her worry about him.
Holly almost dropped the tray of food as she ran towards Alex. "My Lord!" Holly called as she set the tray on his desk and tried to get him to snap out of his trance. The faint aura around Alex dispersed as Alex's eyes took on their normal color. He shook his head slightly as if to regain his bearings as he stared confused at Holly. Once he regained his senses his look became stern.
"Holly wha the hell are you...." Alex was cut off in mid sentence as he turned away from Holly and coughed up a large amount of blood. Holly stared in shock as Alex's shaking hands reached for a cloth that was already stained with much blood. Alex wiped the blood from his lips as he breathed deeply to regain his composure before looking back at Holly. "What are you doing here?"
"Well I was bringing you your breakfast, but evidently I need to bring you more than that. Hold on and I'll go get some herbs for your bleeding." Holly said as she turned to leave.
"Herbs, bandages, magic, nothing will heal what is wrong with me. Besides, I'm fine." Alex replied softly as he closed his eyes again and looked as if he was preparing to continue what he was doing before Holly entered.
"My Lord, what are you saying? Better yet, what are you doing?" Holly asked as he turned to face him. He looks as if he's already dead. What the hell has happened to him in only a short amount of time?
"If I tell you, will you leave me the hell alone?" Alex asked visibly annoyed by her presence.
"Yes my Lord." Holly replied quickly. He looks so tired, I can barely believe it. He didn't sleep any last night, that's obvious, but still it shouldn't have drained him this much. I can see why Kiba felt sorry for him, he does look pathetic.
Alex sighed as he rested his chin on his two hands and looked at Holly with glazed eyes. "Fine then. What I'm doing is using a spell, a very dangerous one, and partially forbidden one. It casts an astral projection of myself which allows me to move quicker, cover more ground. It’s the fastest way I know of finding out where in the hell those mages sent her."
"Dangerous? Forbidden? Why are you doing this?" Holly asked, still not sure what to think. Alex actually smiled at her as he thought about his answer.
"I messed up. I allowed my pride to go before my heart something that I'm regretting. I lost the person that was most precious to me because I was too blind to see that I truly did care about her. I was so wrapped up in wanting to keep her safe that I lost sight of what was really important. Brittany could've cared less who's after her, just as long as I was with her. I didn't realize that until it was too late. Now I'll be damned if I allow anything to happen to her before I can make things right." Alex's words had the same effect on Holly that they had on Kiba. In Alex's eyes, Holly could see that he had lost all hope, but in his words was something that Holly never thought she would hear. Every word he spoke was full of remorse, and full of love.
"M-my Lord." Holly stammered as she looked at him. "If you care so strongly about her, if you truly do love her, then you need to eat and get some rest. You won't do her much good if you kill yourself trying to find her."
"I told you, I'll be fine. Now I believe you said you'd leave me alone once I told you what I was doing." Alex said as he motioned towards the door.
"No, I'm not leaving until you either eat or go to bed." Holly insisted. "You won't be any use to her if your dead."
"Holly for crying out loud I told you I'm fine!" Alex argued. "There's no point in sleeping, if she can stay up three days to watch over me the least I can do is go a night without sleep."
"Yes, but at least she ate something. Even you need to eat especially if using that spell drains so much out of you." Holly continued as she glared daggers at Alex.
"There's no point in me eating either. Anything I'd eat at this point would just taste like blood, so there's really no point in me trying to eat." Alex replied softly. "I don't particularly find the taste of blood that appeasing. Now that I've said this, I don't believe there's any reason for you to stay here."
Holly nodded slightly and turned to leave. When she reached the door she stopped and turned back towards Alex. "My Lord, I know now that you really do care about her. I am sorry for doubting you. There are some things about love that I still need to learn. Still, Kiba, Shadow, and myself know that there is something you are not telling us or her. Something that she needs to hear. We know there is another reason for her being here, its just I am the only one that will say it to your face. Kiba thinks of you as his son and doesn't want to believe that you could deceive her, he cares about you too much to admit it. Shadow, well...you now him, he wouldn't dare go against you, he's too sweet to. I neither care too much about you, nor am I sweet, that's why I am able to say this."
"Holly, before you continue and overstep your boundaries know this. I have no intention of hurting her again, nor do I have any intention of keeping things from her. Don't you think it might be possible that if I have kept something from her it might be for her own good? Now, I suggest you leave me be and go talk to Shadow." Alex said with a knowing smirk throwing Holly off guard.
"What do you mean by that?" Holly asked as she mentally kicked herself for mentioning Shadow.
"Let me give you some advice that I've learned the hard way. Don't hide your feelings. If you care about someone tell them. Love comes at a price, but its worth the pain if but for a moment that person you care about with all your heart is with you." Alex said in a soft voice that was filled with pain. Holly knew in an instant that Alex was lost in memories of him and Brittany, and it wasn't long before he had to look away as he mentally shoved back unshed tears. Holly nodded towards Alex as she whispered.
"Thank you." With that Holly slipped out of Alex's study with one thought on her mind. Shadow, I'm going to make things right. You and Kiba were right, he loves her. That's painfully obvious. All this time I thought everyone else was blind, not it seems as if everyone else could see what I could not. Still, I fear my Lord is going to hurt her once again. Not telling her his true feelings is what got him in this mess. Keeping secrets from her, especially ones that directly involve her, I hope he knows what he's doing. Now I have my own confessions to make. My own secrets to reveal.