Fire Emblem Fan Fiction ❯ Fire Emblem: POR~Funny That ❯ Funny That 1: The 'Crew; ( Chapter 1 )

Fire Emblem: Path Of Radiance~Funny That

Genre: Romance/Humour/Drama

Pairings: Ike+Elincia. Slight Ranulf+Lethe

 

I haven't done a Fire emblem fic before, so I just figured, hey, why not?

Disclaimer: Ha! I'm gonna get sick of saying this eventually, but I don't own Fire emblem POR or any other fire emblem for that matter.

 

Funny That 1: The `Crew'

After sitting there for a few moments, Stefan had to except the fact that Ike wasn't going to regain consciousness anytime soon. Sure, it had been hilarious watching the young lord faint, as usually he was so very calm and collected, but it had now turned into one of though instances where you wished you had a rewind button. Grumbling, the swordmaster picked the figure up, slinging him over his shoulder. He then dragged Ike, supporting the boy's weight and grumbling along the way.

 

Titania, meanwhile, was with Boyd, lecturing him on his eating manners. She was extremely pestered by his lack of grace and utensil handling, but her rants to him were coming out as the very frequent `blah blah, blah blah. Blah, blah.' They were in one of the many rooms, when they heard a knock at the door. Blinking, Titania pivoted around and approached the door.

 

She was usually angry when she ranted at Boyd and surely everyone could hear it, so why would they interrupt. A tad shocked it had actually occurred, she opened the door with a lack of anger on her face, to find Stefan grinning wearily at her.

 

Boyd and Titania gawked, wide eyed, at the figured draped across Stefan's back. It was Ike. Titania bit her lower lip tentatively, before deciding it was better to remove the strain from Stefan before answers were received. He cast her a graceful look when she and Boyd took Ike from him, laying him gently out on the floor. Titania arched her brow at Stefan expectantly.

 

“Oh right, Ike fainted.” He explained casually, coupled with his usual casual grin.

 

“You're kidding me! Lemme get this straight. Mister cool and collected army commander lord fainted?” Boyd commented, doubt ringing in his voice.

 

“Yes, this is not something Ike would do.”

 

There was silence for a few moments, before they both gave Stefan a mysterious look. He was rather baffled at the look at first, before he realised what they were implying. Putting his hands up defensively, he gave them a grin.

 

“Oh c'mon. I didn't knock the guy out.”

 

“Well, you do train him…”

 

“Haven't trained him since Crimea was rebuilt.”

 

“How are we sure?”

 

“Look you two. If we trained, you'd know about it, `cause Elincia would somehow be watching and Mist would be commentating on the fight. Though I swear she purposely distracts me `cause she's on Ike's side. Bah…I'd love to have a little sister like that.”

 

“Whatever you say Stefan…”

 

“Do you want to know why he fainted Boyd?”

 

“Huh? Sure why not…”

 

“I told him he loved Elincia and it seems the whole `mercenary warrior' mind of his couldn't process it. It must have been pretty overwhelming to a kid whose grown up with swords around him all the time.”

 

“Wait, wait, and wait. You told him he loved Elincia?”

 

“Whoa. Let me rephrase this. Explained to him he loved her.”

 

Titania found herself nodding in agreement. It seemed plausible that was the reason. But, though on the outside her professional ranking was showing, inside she was doing cartwheels of joy.

 

`Yes! Someone finally had the moxy to point it out to Ike! Ooh! I can just predict what'll happen next! Girl chats to Elincia, a forbidden romance…ooh! How romantic!'

 

Unfortunately for her, the professionalism slipped from her face and Boyd and Stefan gaped at her, though she was oblivious with her dreamy look plastered on her face. Boyd, first to regain his composure, struck a cool pose.

 

“Seriously, I bet she's just looked at me too long. I mean, I just know she wants me.”

 

For lack of a better judgement, Stefan decided he would try not to laugh at Boyd, but being the easy going and easily humoured man he was, he burst into hysterics, making the cool pose of Boyd falter.

 

“Seriously, I bet you just looked at her too long. I mean, I just know you're delusional.”

 

Huffing somewhat, he ran his hand through his thick hair in a cool way. (A/N: Geez, I'm making Boyd sound and act like Lloyd from Symphonia…hee hee, Boyd and Lloyd rhyme! `Blank stares from people' Eh heh, right…let's drop this, shall we?)

 

Titania reverted back to her normal focus and sighed at the two males in the room as her.

 

“So, what do we do now Stefan? Wait for him to get up? Then what?”

 

Stefan's huge grin must have lit up the small room they were in.

 

“Then, we really help him.”

Grumbling, the blue haired lord sat up, rubbing his eyes and the back of his head. He wasn't sure how long he had been out, but it had to be a while. He must have been publicly scarred for life. It was terribly humiliating for him to faint, but why did he again? Oh…THAT REASON.

 

A dim shade of red adorned his features, before a tired and sad look took hold of his eyes.

 

`Gah, these kind of things must be so obvious. I'm so dense…oh no…'

 

His breath was hitched in his throat.

 

`What if he's gone and told Elincia now?'

 

“Hey, finally up sleepy head, eh?” A voice chortled.

 

Startled, Ike's body jerked slightly, before recognition of the voice happened. He looked over his shoulder to find Stefan there, arms crossed, his trademark smile located on his face, yet this time breeching the borders of his cheeks. Ike didn't like that smile…to him, it signalled something and Ike had a feeling he knew what it was, but in the deep recess of his mind, he prayed it wasn't.

 

“Ah, um…where have you been?” He asked suspiciously in the calmest voice he could muster.

 

Stefan merely shrugged.

 

“Just had an audience with Queen Elincia.”

 

“Huh? Wh…why?”

 

“Actually, I didn't Ikey boy. Don't lose your nerve. I wouldn't just go and tell her your feelings. Though she'd obviously return them, but I can't tell him that. I'm gonna help you though, and you're gonna be the one to tell her.”

 

Ike reached his feet, dusting himself down, before he gave Stefan the same look he had had on previously.

 

“I'm not telling her anything.”

 

Stefan gaped as Ike promptly whirled around and then attempted to walk briskly out of the door. I say attempted, because awaiting him at the door was a grinning Boyd and a smiling Titania. He glanced to and fro them and tried to open the door, but Boyd quickly stepped in front of it, blocking the entrance. Scowling, the young lord picked out the large open window and made a dart for that but Titania, closer to the very same window, stepped in front of it. He tried the next window, but Stefan took care in blocking that one.

 

He checked for others, but was met with no chance of escaping, unless he overpowered them. He glanced at them all. Titania's axe glinted from the sunlight pouring in from the open window, Boyd's axe sparkled from the same source and taking a glance at Stefan's Vague Katti, the sword glimmered. Sighing, he hung his head in defeat, before he looked back up at them. They felt a pang of sympathy, but that was short lived when Titania began fantasising again, Boyd remembered he liked seeing Ike getting worked up and Stefan was going to spread his intelligence and get a good few laughs.

 

“Don't be so sad Ike, we're gonna help you!”

 

Ike looked Boyd right in the eye, before his hung his head despairingly again.

 

“Oh joy…”

 

“Ah, ah, ah,” Stefan curtly stated in a matter-of-fact tone, “sarcasm is not part of our help Ike.”

 

“I don't need any help though! Can you not just leave me be? Let me get on with my life normally!”

 

Momentary silence.

 

“No. I mean, if we did that, we'd never forgive ourselves.” Stefan said sincerely.

 

“Gah. I reeeaaallllllyyy hate his logic.”

 

“Quite simply Ike, as it appears you need things to be put bluntly for you to understand in this kind of area, we're going to help you with Elincia.” Titania said plaintively, struggling to withdraw the enthusiasm from her voice.

 

Ike's eyes widened, before he shook his head abruptly, seemingly disagreeing with the help offer from his friends.

 

“Look, I appreciate the offer. Really I do…hack cough NOT …I don't think I should try and complicate things. I'll just, drop my eh…l…love for Elincia.” He winced slightly at the pain in his stomach from saying that. Stefan rolled his eyes. Ike was just really scared of rejection. At least the boy wasn't so dense that he didn't realise he was a hopeless romantic, an actual, hopeless romantic, who hadn't the first clue about romance.

 

Stefan grinned maliciously. It was time yet again to bring out the big guns…

 

“Y'know, I think she blushed at Andrew a few hours ago…”

 

He was cut off by a fist slamming against the wall. The three gawked at Ike, who removed his hand from the wall. The blue haired lord's mouth was in a firm line as he cracked his knuckles together, determination blazing in his blue eyes.

 

“What kind of help is this?”

 

Stefan grinned triumphantly.

 

It was so on.

So now, Ike was in another room, much larger than the previous one, with much more of familiar faces gathered within it. Mist was at Ike's side, grinning like she had just won something. Titania and Boyd were awaiting news to break with anticipation. Soren was just standing there, with a half frown. He had been learning and he was disrupted. If it was something completely trivial, he would not be a happy bunny…sage. Lethe was standing with Ranulf, who was grinning at Ike, already aware, while Lethe was just annoyed to be stuck around so much noise. Mia was standing with Rhys, who was smiling fondly at everyone, as high in energy as ever. Stefan was simply next to a befuddled Ike, who turned to him, glaring suspiciously.

 

“What is it Ike?”

 

“I presume they're all here to help me?”

 

“Ya got that right Ike! Mia reporting for duty!”

 

“Gah! I'm not going to get through this alive Stef…”

 

“Andrew…”

 

“What's this help?”

 

A hushed tension fell upon the troopers, unnerving Ike a bit. Stefan mentally rolled his eyes and inwardly sighed. Why on earth were these guys treating it like it was not allowed to be said?

 

“As you need help telling Elincia, we are going to give you lessons.”

 

Ike gaped at him, with the most surprised and affronted expression on the face of the planet, before he sobered up and glowered at Stefan.

 

“I don't need help in that area!”

 

“Ike, no offence, but when I stated you had `high feelings' for Elincia, you couldn't grasp what I was getting at. You need help in this area. Its ok, we're family and friends who have to help each other.”

 

Ike proceeded to scan the room, getting a good look of everyone, before he glared in an exasperated manner back at Stefan.

 

“Gah. What kinda family forces a member into doing something they don't want to do?” He muttered.

 

Stefan gave Ike a sympathetic grin.

 

“It wasn't us. It was Andrew!”

Stefan's Shipshape Schedule for Ike:

 

Lesson 1: What a girl needs: Tutor is Titania; be warned, Titan will do most of the talking =) Time noon

Lesson 2: Boyd's methods of wooing the ladies: Tutor is sorta well, obviously Boyd Ikey boy! Time dusk

Lesson 3: Mia's great peppy pep talks: Tutor is the peppy Mia! Have fun! Time evening, `round 6 or so

Lesson 4: Prompting by the cat: Tutor is Lethe. I suppose she'll sorta…eh…threaten you to tell Elincia! It's a great morale boost! Have fun! Time dawn

Lesson 5: The general advice of the caring healer: Tutor is Rhys. I don't think you'll lose your mind on this one… `cept from boredom…HOLD UP! I didn't write that…um…time is around 3 in the morning!

Lesson 6: Myself, Mist and Rolf laughing our heads off at you: Tutors us three! We'll attend all your lessons and watch you screw up! Don't worry Ikey boy, us laughing at you is a fantastic morale boost too! Time check your other lessons!

 

Ike was positively riveted to be out through the schedule that Stefan had worked so hard on and completed within the space of a minute. Wow, he really just couldn't wait! Titania going all girly! Wow was that ever special! And Boyd teaching Ike his moves to get the royalty falling hard, wow what a treat that was! Ike was just awestruck! And Mia rambling on and helping him get courage to tell Elincia and then go into vivid detail about how she would reject him and run into Andrew's arms (Stefan will tell her to say something like this actually) Wowie! He couldn't wait! And Lethe pointing her claws at his throat and demanding he tell Elincia? Ooh! Sign him up! Aww and Rhys sane and calm talk was something he wasn't looking forward to at all. Who really gave a damn about actual real and sensible facts that might actually help Ike? And Mist, Rolf and Stefan hampering his already low esteem in this area? Heaven…

 

NOT.

 

Ike was absolutely terrified of what torture he was going to be put through. He was scared of seeing a girly Titania. Scared that Boyd's girl handling skills would rub off in him. Mia ranting on and crushing his hopes constantly was not morale boosting. Nor was Lethe nearly killing him if he didn't tell Elincia his feelings. He was looking forward to Rhys actual lesson, because that was going to be a sane one. Oh wait, Mist, Rolf AND Stefan were going to be there…that sucked. And they would be there laughing their heads off? How the hell was that courage boosting!

 

Muttering and cursing, the boy yawned. He suddenly found himself very tired and decided to retire for the night. It was probably from the mental stress affecting him psychically, or perhaps Lethe's lesson was already having an impact…who knew? Why on earth was he doing this in the first place anyway? He could just let Elincia go with Andr…go with suitor boy and forget about his feelings.

 

He imagined this Andrew boy embracing Elincia and nearly choked on his own breath. Stefan had introduced Ike to Andrew to show he was not kidding. He was tall, well built and handsome but oh god did he have the royal snobbiness. He had the bad royal air, not the voice. The voice of royalty was no bother as they were raised to have posh accents. But just the way he used it as if he was a superior one…Elincia had stood at Andrew's side, fidgeting nervously while not making eye contact with Ike. Andrew had been staring at Ike with the superior look, while Ike had found himself seething, but eyeing Elincia. She clearly did not like him from her reactions or was she…aware of Ike's feelings and upset from putting him in that weird position!

 

No way. Stefan had said he hadn't said, so what was it?

 

When he realised he could find no plausible answers after racking his brain and bringing up a headache, the boy began to drag himself to the place where he slept. The Greil Mercenaries now lived in Crimea and had rooms within the royal castle; Pointing out it was a rather big castle. Mia had joined the mercenaries, along with Stefan, who had not gone back to the dessert for some reason. Lethe, Ranulf and Mordecai came to stay and visit them so much it was practically their home anyway.

 

His feet padded gently upon the ground as he approached his room. On the way he passed a few of the guards and they saluted at him and nodding wryly, he continued on his trek to his room.

 

After a few moments he sure the oak door that when opened revealed his grand room, but before he got that close, he heard a;

 

THUD

 

He blinked, before curiously scanning the area around him.

 

THUD THUD

 

The sound was nearing him.

 

THUD THUD

 

He gritted his teeth. Ragnell was in his room and he had no other weapons.

 

THUD THUD

 

However, being the brave fool he was, he decided to show he was not intimidated.

 

“Show yourself!”

 

He heard a slightly feminine yelp and gawking he frantically rescanned the area until his eyes fell upon the source. His jaw hit the ground as there, in all her night dressing glory, stood Elincia, hands clasped over her mouth, face bright red. He must have blushed then and unluckily, she must have noticed, as her blush dimmed slightly and her eyes glittered with intrigue.

 

“Ah…my Lord…Ike.” She removed her hands from her mouth, speaking stiffly and slowly, the fact the tone of voice was unsure certain. Ike forced a smile at her, still in shock she was here. He tried to ignore the feeling of his heart banging against his rib cage.

 

“Queen Elincia, what on earth are you doing running around at this time of night? How did you slip past the guards?”

 

“They are rather…dim on hearing and vision perception I suppose.”

 

“Ah, but…why on earth are you here my Queen?”

 

He was a bit perplexed when she let loose a disgruntled sigh.

 

“Lord Ike…please just call me Elincia.”

 

“B…but my Que…”

 

“Please…it is one of the few moments I can forget my title and just be myself; Elincia.”

 

“Elincia…”

 

She beamed at the young lord.

 

“Thank you my Lor…”

 

“Ah uh.”

 

“Um..? Is something amiss my Lor..?”

 

“Ah uh! If I address you as Elincia, you address me as Ike!”

 

She gave him a blank look, before her lips curved up in a soft, sweet smile.

 

“Well of course then my Lo…Ike.”

 

They smiled at each other, but then a frown appeared on Ike's face.

 

“But Elincia. You should not wonder the hallways at this hour..!”

 

“Ike…”

 

“What if you were to come to danger? Be raped or kidnapped!”

 

“I…Ike?”

 

“Maybe that Andrew would be one…”

 

Elincia's eyes widened. Ike could feel the rage building in his being and he was ready to release it. But then he realised he was going to direct at Elincia, and she deserved nothing of the such. He was going to stop himself, but in his case, his jealousy equalled his love, so he failed. He was about to curse Andrew until Dawn, until he saw something that tore him in two. There was disappointment in Elincia's eyes.

 

It was his turn for his eyes widen and then a shadowed emotion glazed them as he looked over the floor. Seeing this, the disappointment was knocked out of Elincia's eyes and replaced by concern.

 

“Ike? What is the..?”

 

She halted when he looked up, giving her a reassuring smile.

 

“Its ok. I just had a particularly long day. Lack of sleep made me cranky.”

 

His smile was reassuring, but Elincia was not fully reassured as the look in Ike's eyes was still clearly seen. He turned to leave, before a hand on his shoulder stopped him. He immediately tensed, before he glanced over his shoulder, to meet eyes of brown.

 

“Ike? Why were you angry about me walking down the protected hallways?” She questioned.

 

Jealousy

 

“Ah well…”

 

The thought of his arms around your waist

 

“As I have said, I am tired…”

 

The image of you smiling your angelic smile at him

 

“And I was rather worried about you…”

 

The look of happiness in your eyes that I wished was not for him, but…

 

“About you…you know…walking alone at these hours…”

 

…Was for me…

 

“And I kinda expressed it in the wrong way. I'm sorry Elincia.”

 

…Forever…

 

He expected her to be angered at him, but he was surprised when a smile came to her face.

 

“Thank you Ike. Thank you for worrying.”

 

He stiffened when her face neared his cheek and then she placed her lips upon his cheek, but quickly removed them, blushing faintly. “I must return to my room. Have a good nights sleep Ike.” She said in a soft tone.

 

He grinned at her like a love struck teenager.

 

“Yeah, I think I will. You too Elincia.”

 

She curtsied at him briefly, before creeping back along the hallway, but not before she halted and waved at him, but disappearing when the blush on her face deepened. Ike gazed at the spot where she had waved at him from, hand subconsciously making its way to his cheeks. He smiled dreamily (A/N: The thought of Ike smiling dreamily seemed really funny to me.) happiness dancing in his blue orbs. “Wow, she kissed me on the cheek.”

 

Stefan, watching from the shadows, beamed at him.

 

“Yeah she did Ikey boy.” He said in a low tone.

 

His smile widened, but into a triumphant and somewhat cocky grin.

 

“Funny that.”

A/N: Ah, I love randomness. As I never have anything to say…I suppose I'll leave you with the usuals;

 

Flame if you want

Please R+R if you enjoyed it

Constructive criticism is greatly appreciated.

 

I doubt I will be flamed about the pairing, as you wouldn't be reading it if you didn't find the pairing ok, right?

Ah and next chapter its lesson trauma; Titania style

 

Bye and thanks if you reviewed