InuYasha Fan Fiction / Ranma 1/2 Fan Fiction / Urusei Yatsura Fan Fiction ❯ The Official Fanfiction University of Rumiko Takahashi! ❯ Inuyasha + baseball = ? ( Chapter 17 )

I know that EVERYONE can relate to this chapter. For me, school just started back and it's harder than ever... I'm just glad I'm not going to THIS University, though.

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Cait found a note posted outside the dorms. It had written on it;

Amendment to exam schedule. Several of your number attempted to blot out some of the original list in order to get out of some exams. Here is what was covered up. Remember, Study, study, study!

10:15-11:15 - Spell-check- Pros and Cons (Myoga)

11:30-12:30 - Anatomy of the slash fic. (Ryoga)

12:45-1:45 - Nicknames - dos and don'ts (Sessho-maru)

-Your teachers

Studying, studying, studying. That about summarized Cait's life the week leading up to Friday.

Each teacher was reviewing their individual class vigorously, except for the 'In character or out of character?' class, whose real teacher had never shown up. Cait was stuck looking over her scattered notes from scattered substitutes.

"How could they forget to assign a teacher to a class? It just doesn't make sense!" Cait grumbled, leafing through a page from the day Miroku had subbed, the only day they had gotten any real work done.

"Tell me about it..." her roommate Pia muttered, heaving a stack of notes back onto her bed. "But I know that Kikyo's got it in for me, I just know it."

That reminded Cait of something. "Pia, how are the 'Kikyo-bashers anonymous' meetings going? Has anything improved at all?"

Pia made a face. "If anything they're worse." She leaned toward Cait, and whispered in her ear, "I think she might actually be getting her point across to me, that's the scariest thing. I mean, last night when she was explaining why shooting Inuyasha to a tree just to sexually torture him, and lowering herself to Naraku's level by pitching him and Kagome against each other just didn't make that much sense." Pia shivered at the thought. "Especially not after she told us just how many points on our final grade we lost if we tried to kill her. Even I was sure plot #4658, the flamethrower one was going to work! But I guess we underestimated the power of her sacred arrows. Everyone thought plot #6792, the mace/spear combo would work out, but she dodged at the last moment. I still have scars from that. But it's not working, we still haven't breached her force field. Now, #7048 was a real charm, we tried that last night. Didn't work, although. Someone dressed up as Inuyasha, and tried to distract her while the rest of us sneaked up behind her with toxic gas and paralyzing powder. Unfortunately, tin cans didn't make great ears, same with the white-mesh hair, so she wasn't really fooled. And us with the gas forgot poison masks, so we had to crawl away to avoid being asphyxiated... are you listening to me, Cait?"

Cait had fallen asleep listening to Pia recite the KBA's recent failed exploits. Of course, that was hardly a rarity these days. With all the work the teachers were piling onto them, students were incredibly prone to fall asleep on very short notice. Only yesterday Nikki, one of Cait's classmates, had fallen asleep listening to another one of Ranma and Akane's endless, blush-filled lectures assuring everyone they weren't secretly married. Still hadn't explained the rings they were both wearing. 'That's a wedding ring if I've ever seen one,' Eclipse Meagie had said, after seeing Akane and Ranma quickly hiding their hands behind their backs.

First-trimester exam review was going on the entire week preceding the big day. Cait had never been so distressed about school before this. Every single night they were given piles of homework from each teacher.

"I might do better if they'd leave time to sleep... boy, I'm tired!" Cait slumped into her desk as the bell rang for Cooking class.

Akane entered, wearing an apron over her dress. "Welcome, class!" She gave everyone a big smile, so they all knew they were in for something nasty. "Today we'll be playing a game. It's called musical chairs! Only we'll be playing with food! Doesn't that sound fun?"

From the looks on the students faces, it sounded as much fun as Koga's 'spirited' lecture on slashes the other night.

"Great! I've put twenty-five dishes, that's one for each of you, and placed one in front at each place on the table. The game is played like this; Everyone walks around the table while I play music, and when the music stops, you sit down in the nearest chair and eat the food in front of you. If you correctly identify it, you can keep playing. If you don't..." Akane smiled even sweeter. "You'll have the honor of personally taste-testing all my original recipes for a week. Let's start, now!"

"Um, Ms. Tendo?" Cait raised her hand. "Who... Who made the food on the table?" She already knew the answer.

"Me, of course! Now, everyone get around the table and start walking while I turn on the music." Akane pressed play on a nearby cd-player and the Ranma ½ opening theme started playing.

It seemed, to Cait, to be a choice between a rock and a hard place. Eat the wretched food or lose and eat it for a week. Might as well just get it over with, she thought to herself, as they circled the table. The silly music stopped abruptly, and Cait sat down in a plush chair, next to a bubbling bowl of purple fluid. A hiss of steam shot up as a bubble burst from inside the bowl. Cait took a big breath, and started eating.

It isn't necessary to describe all the horrible foods, and I use that term loosely, that Cait and her classmates were forced to eat in this 'game.' What matters is that soon there were only two people left, Cait and Kisa.

Cait was sure her tongue was about to start bleeding from all the toxins she had just ingested. 'Just... one... more... plate." she thought to herself, for of course her mouth hurt too much to speak much.

The music started again, and the two quickly circled the table, determined to get the remaining single plate. Again, it stopped suddenly, and Cait dashed to the chair. She was first, and sat down, leaving Kisa standing. Kisa kicked the chair, screaming "No fair! I don't wanna lose! Ah!" Akane motioned for her to join the crowd of other students, as Cait gulped down the last plate.

"Congratulations, Ms. Wilson." Akane smiled at Cait. "You've won!"

The kids clapped as Cait stood up shakily. At least she wouldn't have to taste-test Akane's recipes now...

"Since you're so good at identifying and consuming food, how would you like to help out in the kitchen? You'll get extra credit..."

Cait shrugged. She wanted to ask what she would do in the kitchen, but her mouth was too worn out.

"Great! Be there at 6AM and I'll start you off. Homework, class," Akane called as everyone started to leave. "An 1000 word essay on the proper use of Vinegar in soups. Dismissed!"

Pia walked next to Cait. "Are you really going to help out in the kitchen?"

"Wull, whut ulse wud I suy tu hur?" Cait tried to talk with her stinging mouth.

"Maybe you'll get to eat good food. Ours really sucks..." Pia made a face as she thought about how bad the food was. "If you do, promise to try and make it better, ok?"

"I wull." Cait muttered as they rushed off to Archery class.

"Students, this is one of our last classes. I expect you all to pay full attention. It's target practice for you. Now, let us begin."

Kikyo was addressing the class in a very patronizing way, while Kagome had out her notebook to take notes on the kids' work. The targets they were practicing on were set up in the field near the garden, and everyone had been given their own bow to practice shooting real arrows this time, instead of the rubber soft-tipped ones they had been using before.

"Since we will be shooting real arrows today, any attempts to shoot any of your fellow students or teachers will be most severely punished. Be very careful and pay close attention to your arrows. You may commence now."

Cait tried to shoot her arrow at the target. Her first one hit the outer ring. The next one missed completely. The next hit the second to outer ring, the next missed again. Cait was getting tired of this. She was still tired from studying all last night, and before she knew it Cait was leaning against a stake, sound asleep.

"Cait? Cait!" Pia jostled the dozing Cait, who slowly woke up. Opening her eyes, Cait stood up quickly as she noticed the rest of the class was staring at her.

"Oh my..." she whispered as she looked at Kikyo, who was glaring at the drowsy Cait.

"You... fell asleep... in... my class..." Kikyo angrily said, very slowly and surely, and put special emphasis on the word 'my.'

"I... I'm sorry, Ms. Kikyo, uh, Ma'am, miss?" A flustered Cait was having a hard time addressing her teacher. "I promise not to again! I'm sorry, I'm so--"

A glare from the enraged priestess was all Cait needed to shut up. "Do not waste your breath, wretched pupil. You will be helping me out with target practice later today. 7:00 tonight. Be there. Now, class, let's move on with our lesson..." Kikyo proceeded to demonstrate proper shooting techniques to the class, while Cait trembled, in fear of what was in store for her.

"So, you're going tonight?" Pia asked a worried Cait that night at dinner.

"Like I've got a choice." Cait was so frightened she could barely eat her food. "Target practice... I wonder what she meant by that?"

Pia shrugged. "I wouldn't worry about it too much if I were you. It's probably just extra practice, or retrieving arrows, or something dumb like that. You won't let that mud-zombie get to you, will you?"

"Pia..." Before she could warn her, Cherry had slapped a charm on her forehead, and zipped on back to the staff tables to finish his food.

Pia patted the paper on her forehead. "Rats, another 'Unauthorized use of a nickname' slip. I've already gotten four this week!"

Sessho-maru, teacher of "Nicknames - do's and don'ts" had gotten so sick of being called crazy things (it was 'Sesshizzle' that sent him over the edge) that he had hired Cherry to, in addition to giving out Anger Management slips, to give out 'unauthorized use of a nickname' slips too. So far almost everyone had gotten some, which was pretty annoying, since once they were on they wouldn't come off for a whole day.

As it neared seven, Cait bid Pia farewell and headed off to the archery range in the field. She wasn't the only one there. Apparently, a lot of students who had misbehaved in Archery had also been sent, too. Cait recognized several from the Kikyo Bashers Anonymous meeting she had watched once. They were all, like her, looking very nervous.

Suddenly, Kikyo came out of the building, and the students grew very, very silent. She was holding a large box, and plopped it down on the grass. After easily averting some attempts on her life, courtesy of the Kikyo Bashers, she announced very loudly "Alright, I'm only saying this once, so listen up. Each of you, grab a suit."

The box contained white and red striped costumes. Cait picked out one that wasn't too big, and slipped it on, on top of her clothes. The students around her were doing the same.

Kikyo took out her bow and arrows. Cait suddenly looked down at her red and white striped outfit. She gasped loudly with recognition. "A target??" She tried to remove it, but couldn't. The foam target was stuck fast.

Kikyo was smiling oddly. "Now comes the punishment for misbehaving in my class!" She picked up her bow and put an arrow to it.

The students and Cait realized what was going on with this 'target practice,' and started running around in panic, screaming like babies. This went on for several hours, in which Cait nearly got shot (or so she thought) fourteen times. After a while, they were all exhausted, and flopped down on the grass, entirely devoid of energy.

Kikyo scowled at them very evilly. Then her face broke out into a smirk. She started laughing.

"Why are you laughing?" asked one of the students. "Are you laughing at almost making shish kebabs of us?"

This only made Kikyo laugh harder. "I never even shot one arrow! You just were so scared that you kept running and didn't notice the sign I had put up." She pointed to a large billboard, reading 'If you have read this sign, you can leave.' The students stared at the sign dumbly, then started to run, trying to leave and quickly. A barrage of small white colored balls blocked their path.

"You're, right, Ranma! These 'baseballs,' or whatever you called them, are fun to throw! Especially at students! ESPECIALLY at fangirls!" Inuyasha and Ranma were both leaning out a first story window, throwing baseballs at the cluster of students.

"What'd I tell you?" Ranma tossed one lightly toward Cait. 'Lightly' meaning it only made a three-foot-deep crater in the ground. "Of course, it could be you only agreed to try it out because Kikyo said she needed someone to help her out..."

Inuyasha clapped his hands over Ranma's mouth before he could say more. Noticing suddenly that Kikyo, along with all the students were watching them, he smiled sheepishly and dragged Ranma behind him. The crowd was left staring at the empty window frame. Kikyo brought the class to attention by blowing her handy-dandy whistle. Some of her soul skimmers flew to her.

"My soul skimmers will escort each of you back to your rooms. Please do not attempt to make any side trips, since it is past curfew, and you will again be meeting me here tonight if you make the slightest endeavor to."

Numerous students muttered as she ushered them past. "It's not fair, she almost killed us with her arrows!" one boy said.

Kikyo glared at him. "You think I would waste _my_ arrows on punishing students. Whatever other projectiles were launched at you, it was most probably my Inuyasha throwing baseballs. Ever since Ranma taught him how to play, he's been absolutely hooked on it... anyway, it was Kagome that was firing the arrows. She has quite a... oh what's the word... 'beef' I think, is what you call it, yes. She has quite a major beef with the Mary-sue writers, whom, I suppose, have come to resemble pincushions by now."

Kagome, who before had just been sitting behind the sign in a chair, stood up and frowned at the crowd. "Yes, I do. Mary-sues, the horrible perfect-girl-set-out-to-nab-the-nearest-male-character type, are a crime to society. I could go on and on about this, but it's late, and you'll get enough lecturing about it from me in my second trimester class, devoted to this menace to society.

It was easy to pick out the Mary-sue writers whom she was talking about, and they had enough arrows stuck through them (non-fatally, of course) to build the Eiffel tower with. Of course, it would be a very thin and rickety tower made of pins, but enough said.

The soul skimmers made nice escorts, actually. They were light blue-silver, and squishy, and made a cute humming sound when you petted them. Cait considered naming hers, but it flew away once she arrived at her room. She sighed and went in, incredibly tired and irritated.

Pia was sitting on her bed, petting Sessho-chan. "Hey Cait! How was target practice!" Cait told her, in detail, about the ordeal with Kikyo pretending to shoot, Kagome actively shooting, and Inuyasha with Ranma, throwing baseballs.

Pia looked sympathetically at Cait. "Guess from now on you'll make sure you're not tired in the morning by going to bed early, right?"

Cait nodded yes, but then she looked at the clock. She grabbed it and shook it several times. "OH MY GOD! 2:00 AM?" She smacked her head. "I need to go to bed!"

Pia shrugged. "You can always sleep during Poetry. Kuno never really cares, as long as you write lots of shlop with the 'handsome kendo artist' and his 'beautiful pigtailed goddess' and he never minds..."

Cait was already asleep before Pia had finished her sentence.

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Why was this chapter taking so long? (Hey, it's a pretty long chapter, too, so don't complain...)

A) Long power-outage from Hurricane Isabel

B) Lots of school work

C) School

But the next one may be less than two weeks off! Who know? I'm really into this fic, and will keep writing. Did you see the new episodes of Inuyasha? They're so cool! I can't wait until the next ones are released into America! ^_^ EEEEEE!