InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Kagome's Diary ❯ The Disapearing Diary and What Inuyasha Wrote ( Chapter 3 )

Dear Diary,

Inuyasha has been taking care of me all day. It's really sweet of him. It makes me want to spill everything only...

I JUST CAN'T.

I know I'm majorly pathetic...but can you blame a girl for having SOME secrets? Ok...maybe A LOT of secrets...but one day I'll tell him everything, I'm sure I'll tell him one day, I'm positive. I've been in bed all day so I tried to convince Inuyasha to let me go out and get some fresh air. God, he's SO protective.

Inuyasha: Um...NO, you could get WORSE Kagome, I WON'T let that happen.
Me: (Alright now I'm sure that whole thing where I nearly died cause of the poison from the band of seven and Koga rubbing it in his face has SO left a mark) Um...why are you being so--well--
Inuyasha: WHAT? AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO RECOGNIZES HOW SERIOUSLY ILL YOU ARE?
Me: (I think now he's bordering on insane) Um...Inuyasha--really--I'm feeling a LOT better..
Inuyasha: My BUTT you are, I'm not risking ANYTHING
Me: But...why--do you care SO much anyway? It's not like you LOVE me or something...

Fortunately that got him to let me go. But then when he found out I rode my bike around town he got all insane again, thinking I was only going to stand out for a bit of fresh air and didn't think I was healthy enough for "strenuous physical activity" I'm just surprised he used a term like that. You know, he was saying all this junk that Sota has said about what's in my diary has made ME go crazy, I'm starting to think it's INUYASHA that's lost it.
So now, I'm sitting out on the front porch alone...wait, now he's coming. And sitting right next to me. I'm sure to tilt the diary away from his slightly prying gaze. "So...what do you REALLY write in that?" he asks. Still trying to look. STOP!
"...um...NOTHING!"
"No, really..."
"Well...just ordinary...you know...everyday stuff...just what happens...and what I feel about it..." I don't look at him but I FEEL his eyes on me.
"Do you...ever write about me?" Ok, I just broke my pencil by pushing WAAY too hard on the paper. Fortunately, I'm using a spare. Does he...SUSPECT what Sota says is true. Dammit, I thought he didn't believe him!
"Sure...sometimes..." More like ALL the time, but you know, I can't say THAT.
"Well...what's ONE thing you wrote..." I look at him with a slight suspicious frown, "...cause...well, I'm just kinda...curious, is all..." I look down at me journal. Let's see, should I tell him about how I wrote about when I looked at his butt or the kinky dog ear thing? There isn't really much I can say is there? Damn, I must look SOOOO unbelievably suspicious just being totally quiet like this.
"Well...um...I...once...wrote..." Damn what do I SAY? "...wrote about how you yelled at my mom!" That's just terrible. Why can't I just say, "Well, I wrote about how nice it was to take care of me"? That would have been cute and sweet, no I dig up how he yelled at my mom, he must think I totally see him as a jerk. Not that he isn't a jerk sometimes, but, well, he's the jerk I LOVE with is totally than just a jerk. I mean, isn't it?
"Oh..."
"But I--I well--also wrote--that you took care of me and that was nice--" Well, at least I said it. Sort of. He just stares god. Say something, PLEASE.
"...there must be secrets in it...if you have to lie to me..." I AM NOT LYING!! GOD!! HOW COME THE ONE TIME I ACTUALLY TELL THE TRUTH HE HAS TO THINK I'M LYING!! Not that being a coward should be rewarded or something...
"HEY! Look, HERE!" Ok, maybe it's dumb to show him the inside of this diary, but I'm covering most of the words and pointing to the words at the top of the page. Only... I see his eyes wandering around the pages. I snap the book shut almost getting his nose. "That's ALL you can look at!"
"What did you mean by "spill everything"?"
GOD GOD GOD!! Why does he have to be so damn CURIOUS all of a sudden?
"I-I-I--oh fine! I'm...well...planning you a birthday party..." I know, I lied, but can you blame me?
"You ARE?"
I suck. Now I HAVE to throw him a birthday party. Well, I've considered it in the past, but now it SO won't be a surprise. And now, I HAVE to.
"...wow...no one's ever...done that for me...before..." Ok, I can't take the way he's looking at me now!! OMG!!! I have to leave or--something before...I dunno, what he going to do?
"Well--uh--there's a first for...everything!!" Ok, I can stop laughing like an IDIOT now.
"Thank you, Kagome..." Now he stands up, he looks like he's going to leave. AAAH!! What's he DOING? Kay--I can hardly write but...he's knelt down and--god put is hands on my shoulders--is he going to KISS ME?
"Just get better, kay? Maybe you should go back to bed?" Sorry, I have to stop writing...I CAN'T TAKE THIS!


WHAT THE HELL. Alright, so I totally lost this diary for a long time! Well, not that long I guess. All of a sudden, after Inuyasha left, I could NOT find it. At ALL. I totally flipped out. I mean, what if someone else found it first? I looked EVERYWHERE. out on the front porch, under the stairs, everywhere! Finally, this morning--I know, I searched a ton last night, but finally I surrendered and went to bed--I went outside to get the paper...and I found it in a potted plant near where we were. Ok, the only think I can think of is that I left it on my lap and when I stood up it got stuck and finally fell into the potted plant when I got up and left...or something... Probably more likely is when I flipped out I accidentally flung it into the plant....maybe? I don't know. I honestly have no clue.
"Kagome, I'm sorry."
Just to tell you we're eating breakfast now, and that's mom talking. "Huh? About what?"
"Well...about thinking what Sota said was true. I know better now." OMG SHE DID believe him! I KNEW it!
"THANKS A LOT MOM! I can't believe you BELIEVED HIM!"

Alright, so my standing up in rage and screaming may have not been the best thing to do, but at least I'm glad to know Mom grounded Sota for "lying". Do I feel guilty. Um...NO! He totally ratted on me, even though I did EVERYTHING he told me to do in exchange for him NOT telling. The brat! He DESERVES to be grounded!
"BUT I'M TELLING THE TRUTH!" I couldn't resist throwing the stick of butter at Sota...I know he's grounded but that still isn't NEARLY enough punishment!
"I believe you Sota." Yeah, THANKS grandpa. You suck! The weirdest part, is Inuyasha is totally quiet throughout this whole thing, AND he's hardly eating. Weird.
"Kagome, ignore him, Inuyasha and me still don't believe Sota," Mom says with her trademark smile. WHY DOESN'T INUYASHA SAY ANYTHING? What, did he see more of my diary than he SAID he did when I showed him it? We're all staring at him for like ages when finally he says the dumbest thing:
"Sure I don't...I have to go--use the bathroom."
What the hell does THAT mean? Not very convincing. But maybe he's tired of all the arguing in my family. Can't say I'm not. Guess I feel totally better about it, when I actually get a somewhat good view (despite the dreaded poof of his pants) of his butt when he walks away. Was I totally staring though?
"Kagome, YOU'RE SO MEAN!!" Sota whines teary eyed, still wiping butter off his face. Yeah, WHATEVER.

Alright, it's been forever, and nothing good has happened during this dumb breakfast. I mean, Inuyasha's been in the bathroom for AGES. I thought he already figured out by now how to use a modern bathroom...
You know, I can't help but notice, even though I haven't seen much of him this morning, he's been acting a little funny. The every fact I HAVEN;T seen much of him is proof enough. Well, he hasn't eaten much at all and he's hardly said anything--and I don't know he's just acting--odd.
Finally he's back. But I can’t help but feel there's this weird vibe in here...
"It's not fair, how come everyone ALWAYS believes innocent Kagome?" Sota should SO drop it, at this point, only grandpa's on his side. Alright, and now suddenly Inuyasha has spit out the little food he's eating and is in a coughing fit.

I don't like this at all.

"Are you ok?" I ask, putting a concerned hand on his shoulder. What? Can't I touch him A LITTLE? He just stares at my hand on his shoulder like it’s a spider or something. What the...I don't want to know.
"I...am...fine, Kagome..." I think everyone's looking at him weird now. It's really odd, I mean--why is he acting like this?

"Was it something I said?" Really, why did I say that out loud? I hate it when I do stuff like that subconsciously. Inuyasha just stared at me for a long time and finally stood up, his food half eaten. I'm sorry, but that's startling in its self.
"No, I'm done eating..." Is it just me, or did he just give Sota this weird communicating look?
"Uh--I'm done too!" Alright, there's something going on here, why is Sota following Inuyasha. I SO have to look into this! After they leave I quickly start gathering my plate and stuff and now grandpa and my mom are giving me entirely opposite stares. Mom: happy, normal, everyday oblivious smile, Grandpa: concerned, strange, suspicious and hauntingly knowing glare. My family is SO weird.

So I finally got out of there when I heard this stuff as I was approaching the hall:
Sota: So...you did it didn't you--I mean--you didn't chicken out, right?
Inuyasha: *sigh* Yeah...yeah I did it...
Sota: But she hasn't said anything...has she?
Inuyasha: No...
Sota: Well...maybe she didn't see it, that's gotta be it! I mean--why don't you talk to Kagome about it?
Then I walked in.
Me: Talk to me about what?
I know, I should have listened longer, but I got really guilty for some reason eavesdropping. Of course they totally froze when I walked in.
Inuyasha: Uh--um--n-nothing!
Then Sota elbowed Inuyasha like he was trying to get him to tell me something. I don't have the faintest clue as to what they're talking about...I mean...what could have Inuyasha DONE that I was supposed to react to? Now he has to TALK to me? Is THAT why he's acting so weird? The worst part is Sota has something to do with it, that CAN'T be good.
Inuyasha: I--um--well...I...
Sota: I'll just say it, see Inuaysha s--

Unfortunately Inuyasha covered Sota's mouth at that point and now I'm sitting here in my bedroom, no idea what the hell my little brother was going to say. For once it actually sounded IMPORTANT. Which really sucks. I was just flipping through this journal when I noticed how much I flipped out, I mean, what, has it been like three or four days and it seems like I've been losing it constantly. Well, welcome to my life. It's always something with me. Always. But I haven't been entirely honest with you, diary, I mean, I was just having more thoughts about Inuyasha I kept to myself--but can you blame me? I mean...what if Inuyasha read it or Sota did? I mean--how much faith can Inuyasha HAVE in me? Seriously, I just don't know.

But I might as well just get it out of my system. Basically, Sota and me were arguing more and my mom kept telling us to stop and she totally flipped.
Me: Uh...mom...it's not THAT big of deal....
Mom: Maybe you'll understand it's very stressful being a mother when you have you're OWN kids!

Though she was all mad at me and stuff when she said it, I couldn't help feeling a little better. I'm not sure what's wrong with me but for some reason I couldn't help thinking what it would be like if I had Inuyasha's kids... I mean, wouldn't they be SOOO cute? They might even have those adorable dog ears--maybe not--but if they wind up anything like him they'd be REALLY cute. I wonder how much traits they'd get from him and how much from me--I mean IF that could ever happen--not that it would...but I just KNOW they'd be so sweet looking! WOULD they have dog ears or would they have normal ones--could they even have elf ears like Sesshomaru or something--because when Inuyasha transforms into a human I noticed his ears first turn into elf ones--so maybe it's like they're less demon... That would be REALLY cute too... They'd probably have his golden eyes--and his stubborn attitude...wonder what other traits they'd get though... Wouldn't be interesting if they had black hair BUT they had silver dog ears?
But...if we had kids that would mean I'd have to be with him...and...stuff--and I'm NOT that kind of girl (even though some of the things I've written might prove otherwise). Well...I guess if we got married first then it would be okay. AAAH!! What am I THINKING? Have I TOTALLY lost it? As if Inuyasha would marry me anyway? Isn't Kikyo the girl he's most interested in? I mean--he might like me a little--maybe--but still, you don't marry someone because you like them a LITTLE and if you're madly in love with someone else.

What the--I was flipping through the journal and I was sure I saw something I wrote at the back--I DON'T remember writing anything in the back. I mean--I do that with OTHER journals, but I don't remember doing that with this one.

What the--ok, I did NOT write this--it almost looks like SOTA did--I can't believe--the NERVE!!! So when he found my journal he decided to rub it in my face by writing in it! So let's see--what the hell does it say?

"Hey, Kagome please don't get mad...I know I shouldn't have looked in your diary--or stolen it either..."
Damn right he shouldn't have. God, little brothers are such a pain.
"Either way, I'm sorry."
Well, that's mature for him, he actually apologized without mom making him.
"But I see this stuff you wrote is really important and though I wasn't supposed to see it--I can't help but think I know you better thanks to it..."
Yeah! Know my desires for Inuyasha! I don't think anyone else in this WORLD needs to know that but me!
"I'm not going to judge you badly because of it, I still think you're the greatest."
He's only saying that because he wants me to forgive him, sometimes brothers can be SUCH suck ups!
"Also, I want you to know that, it's hard for me to say this next part and I hope you can believe me when I say I loved you and still do."
Aw, I'm glad Sota can be sweet sometimes--AH!! NO!! SNAP OUT OF IT, ME!! He's suckering me into forgiving him!
"I can't believe I'm writing this either...sorry I haven't been honest with you all this time, really. Even if reading all this kind of came to a shock I still know in my heart who I want to be with..."
Um...kay...this is making less and less sense.
"I didn't believe Sota
WHAT? WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT? WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT????!!!!!!!!
W
T
F
WHAT?
Didn't believe....SOTA? WHAT?
IF SOTA'S PLAYING TRICKS ON ME--PRETENDING HE'S WRITING AS INUYASHA--HE'S SO DEAD!!!

But now that I think about it--this hand writing does NOT look like Sota's.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!

No way, I refuse to believe Inuyasha wrote this.

"I'm not sure if my dog ears are kinky but whatever, if you love me that's all that matters."

..................................................... .............................................

I wonder if I can move to a different country.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH WHO AM I KIDDING!!! I'M DEAD!!! DEAD I TELL YOU!!! D-E-A-D DEAD!!!

Wait...did he say that...he....

No way, he doesn't love me, now I KNOW it wasn't Inuyasha that wrote this. I can rest at ease...of course...it's sort of...disappointing if he doesn't FEEL that way about me...

But wait--didn't I over-hear Inuyasha and Sota talking about something Inuyasha did that I didn't notice--
AND DIDN'T MY JOURNAL DISAPEAR THAT ONE TIME WHEN INUAYSHA LEFT?
Oh god, I HAVE to calm down--DEEP BREATHS!! I'm SOOO confused, I don't know WHAT to believe.

Either way though, I think I'll kill Sota--all this aggravation is thanks to HIM!!

To be continued!!! MOOHAAHAA!