InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Kagome's Diary ❯ When the Closet Doesn't Lead to Narnia ( Chapter 8 )
[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]
By: cheesylovesong23 
Kagome needs to think fast. Her friends are on a quest to get her to talk to Inuyasha. Everyone knows how relentless they are. But Kagome won't leave her sanctuary. Her closet. What will lead Kagome into a choice between being seen in underwear or as a liar? And what does the back of the closet lead to in THIS story?
Anime/Manga: InuYasha Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Comedy / Romance | Type: Continuation | Uploaded On: 12.24.2005 | Updated On: 04.27.2006 | Pages: 5 | Words: 5.0K | Visits: 680 | Status: Completed
Kagome needs to think fast. Her friends are on a quest to get her to talk to Inuyasha. Everyone knows how relentless they are. But Kagome won't leave her sanctuary. Her closet. What will lead Kagome into a choice between being seen in underwear or as a liar? And what does the back of the closet lead to in THIS story?
Anime/Manga: InuYasha Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Comedy / Romance | Type: Continuation | Uploaded On: 12.24.2005 | Updated On: 04.27.2006 | Pages: 5 | Words: 5.0K | Visits: 680 | Status: Completed
Okay I’m considering the possibilities in my head.
You know, about why my friends might have said nothing about Inuyasha’s reaction to the whole thing:
1)
You know, about why my friends might have said nothing about Inuyasha’s reaction to the whole thing:
After the dare he just sort of…died, I know it’s horrible, I don’t want to think about it, but it could have happened…but I don’t really know why my friends would send me down here like he was around if he wasn’t–I mean unless they’re totally incapable of being honest with me…which could be true
2)
He turned gay because after I pole danced on him he was so disgusted he could not STAND to be straight a second longer, and started making out with Koga–or Roga or whatever–I know, worst case scenario, but hey, I do tend to be a pessimist when I stress out…
3)
He just went insane and can’t even talk anymore, I’m not sure if this a sign that he went insane do to the grotesqueness of the situation or as Yuka would put it “horny out of his mind” which is too unlikely and disturbing to write in here–but it’s kind of too late because I’m writing in pen…
4)
He turned catonic. A state where you don’t feel, hear, react to, or really comprehend anything around to. You don’t even move or blink. You just stand or sit there, doing nothing at all. It usually follows shocking and/or traumatic events
5)
He just ran. I think, sadly, that this is the most likely of all. But then my friends really are hopelessly stupid if they can’t get over their nervousness and just tell me the heart-breaking truth. Honesty is easier than me acting like a total mindless idiot running around everywhere trying to find Inuyasha when he’s long gone…
6)
He’s expecting an encore. Again, this is so slim chance, it’s like listing the possibility that Miroku’s gay or something.
7)
He’s enraged and wants to hurt me. This thought alone makes me want to die inside this closet.
8)
He feels as if by letting me do obscene things on him–though because of a dare–that he has somehow violated his fidelity toward Kikyo, so now he is an emotional wreck. Maybe this is worse than the one above…
9)
He just laughed so hard afterward because I actually did a bad pole dance despite the fact that I’m pretty sure it was good and stupid Koga jr. or whatever and Hojo seemed like they were drooling up an ocean in my living room. (ew, they better clean it up…)
10)
He really IS eating a lamp like I thought.
11)
He ran to the bathroom to barf. And is still in there. (Oh GOD how can I even FACE him?!!!!)
12)
He feels violated and is calling the police because of sexual harassment… (well, there aren’t police in Feudal Japan, so I doubt he even knows what they are–hopefully this won’t happen then)
13)
He has taken on cooking because it is far safer than the possibility of me pole dancing on him again.
14)
He traveled to Feudal Japan to break it off with Kikyo because now he’s realized that he’s in love with me. *wishful thinking–and why wouldn’t my friends tell me about this????*
15)
He has decided that he now wants nothing to do with me!! (Why me God? WHY?)
I guess it’s my fault for doing the stupid dare…I don’t even know why I gave in…
And maybe that’s the BETTER question! Why did I DO it in the first place? Did somewhere, deep down, did I WANT to do that? …do I need MORE emotional crisis? I’m just going to assume it was caving in due to peer pressure and nothing much more. For my emotional well-being’s sake–I think this is like a have to…
But still…I should have realized that the results would have been bad. Cataclysmic even. And then there’s that blizzard outside. My only hope is that the apocalypse comes early and I die soon so that everyone can forget about it…
BUT THEN THE LAST THING THEY’LL HAVE TO REMEMBER ME BY IS THE POLE DANCE!!!
Oh
My
God
THERE IS NOTHING WORSE THAN THAT!!!!!!!!!!
I have to get out of here! I have to convince Inuyasha that it wasn’t some sicko, perverted, hormone driven motive which caused me to do the stupid dare to pole dance on him! If I don’t then on my tombstone it will read:
“Kagome Higorashi
Pole dancer, ho, and all around wild girl!”
……………
I wish I could go catonic!!! OHMIGOD!!! I AM SUCH AN IDIOT!!!! How could I not think about this? I’m always so practical!! I’m always so good too! I’ve always been a goodie two shoes!! I don’t DO stuff wrong!! I just DON’T!
Oh, but NOW I do!! I mean, looking back in my diary, I see terrible crap written! Like “penis” “horny” “ho”!! I mean does it get any WORSE? I don’t THINK so… The only other time I wrote “penis” was when we were learning about the reproductive system at school! (And I was the most embarrassed about it too!) But now I’m talking erections and pole dancing! I’ve turned into a slut-writer! I’m not really a slut–BUT MY WRITING IS!! It’s almost like I’ve got this sicko drive deep down and finally it has escaped…
I mean–I guess I wasn’t ever THAT much of a goodie two shoes…not as much everyone thought, anyway… But until now I was a pretty damn good girl. (see, I cuss, I’m a rebel, no worse, a ho. A pitiless ho, who will have no future but to be stuck in dysfunctional relationship after dysfunctional relationship, built on pole dancing and slutty words written on paper…) Sure, maybe a ho is what all the men want these days–but those are the perverted, sexist kind. But then the other end of the spectrum are the freakishly innocent Hojo types. I wonder where Inuyasha falls in all this? Well, despite what my friends say, I’m still not convinced Inuyasha “wants me more” because of all this.
And if he does want me more…does that mean that he’s one of the perverted types? But then, it WAS a pole dance ON him…I guess you can’t really blame him then. But still---HOW EMBARRASSING! What am I supposed to say now? I really need to get out there! I need to make sure they know I’m not a wild ho! (But, now I’m not even sure about that…)
Maybe sub-consciously I thought I could win Inuyasha over if I did the dare. …my subconscious obviously didn’t figure how INSANE I’d go from all this EMOTIONAL STRESS!!! What is WRONG WITH ME? Can’t I calculate at all the repercussions of my actions? Maybe I’m over-thinking this…maybe…maybe Inuyasha just had a neutral reaction. You know, indifferent…
But isn’t even THAT bad?
That would mean he wasn’t even attracted at all…but then he wasn’t disgusted either–but the disgust could have been ingenuine–a cover! Like usual! Neutral…that would be devastating! Like I’m not even worth a reaction! …ok, maybe I AM over thinking this…
OH GOD SOMEONE IS KNOCKING ON MY DOOR!!!
God, I promise that I will pray more. I also promise that I will give back the scarf I stole and even pay for it in full. I promise to never even say “oh my god” again as that is taking your name in vain. Just please, please grant me this one single thing before the apocalypse brings about my demise, that Inuyasha is NOT the one knocking and I won’t have to face him yet…
OH GOD!!!! I am so glad!! It’s only my friends!!
(Sorry god, you know, that whole “oh my god” promise might be a little harder than I thought…)
“Come on Kagome, you can’t hide in there forever!” Oh my god–I mean gosh–she’s SO going to give away my cover!! Inuyasha will know where I am!!
“Shut the fuck up!” Oh no. I am terrible. I am a rebel. I just said the f-word. I should be vanquished. My poor friend–though sometimes witless and annoying, did not deserve this–
“What did you just say to me–“
“Calm down, Yuka–“
“Kagome, I am KNOCKING THIS DOOR DOWN, YOU BITCH!!” Thanks, I needed that Yuka. As if I needed MORE reassurance of my being a bitch. Geez, they say if you’re a lesbian, that it’s wrong to insult you for that–WELL WHAT ABOUT BEING KAGOME? There should be a law against discriminating against Kagome Higorashis.
“What’s going on here?”
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I’d know that voice ANYWHERE!!!!!!!!!! IT’S INUYASHA!!!
OUCH!!! DAMMIT!!! DAMMIT, DAMMIT!!! I hit my head on this stupid umbrella when I tripped and fell after I tried to run…somewhere (but where can I run if Inuyasha is standing right outside the only exit???) Ow…my head… I want to cry!! This is all going horribly!! Where am I supposed to hide! How do I get away–how do I keep Inuyasha away?
“Kagome? Are you in there?”
“NO!”
Okay that was dumb. Reminder to self: think before talking. Check.
“Look, I need to talk to–“
‘OH MY GOD!!!”
“Um…what?”
“I uh…” Think of something to keep him shut up. (Hey at least he’s not catonic) “…um…”
“Are you alright?” Oh god. Now you’ve done it. Stupid ass me!! “I’m coming in there!”
OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH NO OH NO OH NO I’M TOAST!! GOOD AND BUTTERED TOAST!!!! SCREWED AS A HORNY RABBIT IN SPRING!!!!
AND I’M SICK MINDED TOO SEE THAT UP THERE? PROOF OF HOW SICK I AM!!!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH THE DOOR IS OPENING WHAT DO I DO WHAT DO I DO!!!?
Alright, well I slammed into the door as it was opening, that sort of did it, but I think I hit Inuyasha’s precious nosey…
Okay…I’m weird. But he DOES have the most precious nosey. Really, I’m being totally objective about this, despite the fact that I’m in love with him, my judgment so isn’t clouded at all. He also has the sexiest smile ever. I’m serious and–
Oh wait, the door.
Well, he can’t get in…because…because…
“I’M CHANGING!!!” That’s a good one… I need to remember that for further use.
But wait…why would I be changing in a closet??? ???
“KAGOME, NO YOU’RE NO–“
“SHUT UP YUKA, ERI WHOEVER THE HELL YOU ARE!!! I AM TOTALLY CHANGING DO I NEED TO WALK OUT THERE IN MY DAMN UNDERWEAR TO PROVE IT!!! COME IN AND SEE FOR YOURSELF I DARE YOU!!” Wow…I didn’t know my voice could be that strong and loud…I think it cracked though… I was desperate…I had to shut her up before she revealed that I was perfectly clothed and Inuyasha would be free to come in, I think it worked too, because it’s dead silent… Maybe TOO quiet…
“You dare me, eh?”
...why don’t I like how she said that?
“Yeah!” Maybe I shouldn’t have said that…but I got to get her to back down. “That’s why I’m in here, Yuka!”
“Alright, well you DID dare me didn’t you, and it IS your turn…I guess I HAVE to open this door then, don’t I?”
No.
She.
DIDN’T.
“But–I–“
“No, Yuka–come on–“ I think that’s Eri whispering. “–she’s already been embarrassed enough, Inuyasha seeing her in her underwear–that’s way too much then a girl can take!” Unfortunately, that is NOT the worst of my problems. The worst is that if she opens that door and I’m not down to my underwear, than Inuyasha will think–no–know that I’m a liar.
So which do I choose?
At this point it totally seems inevitable that Inuyasha will see me in a matter of moments.
But I can determine what he sees me as.
An innocent girl caught changing by a wicked friend: a la: Yuka.
OR
A horrible, god-awful liar, getting the payment she deserves for her crimes.
I can just run, right when Inuyasha sees me, so I can deal with it, just push right past him and my friends (I’ll kick their asses if they try to stop me) and run right up to my room and lock myself in again!
The only problem that remains is that Inuyasha will have to see me in my underwear–but hey it’s better being seen in underwear as a guiltless victim, than fully-dressed as a cowardly liar!
BUT I DON’T WANT HIM TO SEE ME IN MY UNDERWEAR!!!
“Shut up, Eri–Kagome’s not REALLY getting changed, she’s just using it as a cover up to avoid Inuyasha.”
Ha. Now she’ll SO look evil!
But isn’t that kind of mean? I mean, here she is, trying to get me to face my problems, and now I’m going to make her look like the witch of the century, when I’m the one using excuses and lying…
Oh well, I’m going to Hell anyway. I wrote penis in my diary and wondered how dog claws would be like in bed. I’m set for the fiery flames of damnation. Not much I can do now.
Alright, well, I’m stripped down to my underwear and I’m totally ready. I mean, my underwear’s nice, it’s lacy and pink, and it’s not like I’m wearing a thong (ew), so it’s not so bad. Except DAMN is it cold!! What is that DRAFT?
NO.
FRICKING.
WAY.
Oh, you will NEVER believe me, so there is SO no point in telling you.
Okay, FINE.
This is totally ridiculous though.
There’s like this passage way…or something…this is totally like some sort of twist in a plot that a struggling fan fic writer would use. It could serve as an escape, but where the hell does it lead? And why is it here? I think the umbrella was the lever to open it, though…come to think of it, I’ve never seen that umbrella leave this closet before…
You know what, my mom or grandpa or someone could totally be like a spy, and that’s why there’s this passageway.
Or maybe they’re aliens–like I thought–and this is the passage to the mother ship.
Either way, if I stand here, I’ll be seen in my underwear by Inuyasha as it’s FAR too dark in here to even have any hope of finding my stupid clothes, and if I go through the passage way I might be vaporized by illegal immigrants from Neptune, but that is definitely the better alternative.
Oh god!! Close one!! Right when I escaped into the passage way it closed behind me as I heard the door opening to the closet! Damn…how am I going to be able to see.
OH MY FUCKING GOD!!!!!!
I’m sorry but all these torches just lit right when I took a step further in! Now I see that all my writing in the dark is all slanted and curvy and jumbled.
Great.
Just as well, when I’m old it’ll probably be a blessing that I won’t be able to read the embarrassing things I wrote as a teen.
Next thing is…where the heck am I? I mean, why do we have this weird secret passageway in our house? Seriously, I thought nothing all that interesting happened in THIS era. Feudal Era, maybe, but present day? Not so much. Except for that one ghost girl and that whole Noh Mask misadventure. This weird passageway just screams “bizarro adventure like in the Feudal Era “…or something… Okay, fine, not great use of words, but whatever…I’ve been pretty good up until now.
OH dammit, Inuyasha probably has no way of finding me or getting in here–that means I’m all alone!
But…maybe that’s good, right? Because then I won’t have to face him…
OMG!!! There was this weird noise!!! That totally means that some demon is going to pop out at like any second now… Just come out already, god, rat demon or whatever you are…
NO NOT A DEMON–IT SOUNDS LIKE A BAT WHICH IS LIKE WAY WORSE!!! EW EW EW EW EW EW EW!!!! OHMIGOD WHAT AM I GOING TO DO THIS TIME? I DON’T EVEN HAVE ANY FUCKING ARROWS FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!! EW!!
Okay now I SO WISH that Inuyasha was here!!
But how dumb is that? There’s no way he could get in here…could he even find me? Sure he’s got a good sense of smell, but it’s REALLY damp in here…
…perfect breeding ground for rats…
…oh god…
…it’s sort of like…a dungeon in here…
…and there’s ALWAYS rats in dungeons…
...god, god, god, GOD!!!! RATS I HOPE NOT!!! NOT BATS, NOT RATS!!! EW!! AND BUGS TOO–PLEASE GOD NO!!! MAKE IT A DEMON!!!
I’m, going to cry!!! There’s NO WAY I’ll be saved now!! It sounds like rats!! It’s got to be rats!! What the hell is this place anyway, and why did I have to come down here? Why did grandpa or mom or whoever have to make it? Didn’t they think that they’re might be rats if they made this place? Are they insane?!
Oh well, I knew my end was near, and here it is, Inuyasha would never be able to find me here! Oh god, why am I crying? They’re just bugs right? Rats…and bats and stuff…but then again they’re WAY worse than demons–and it’s all dark in here and I AM a real idiot!! I probably deserve to rot in here!! With the rats!!
“MOO-HOO-HAA-HEH!!!”
….ok… that was SO not a rat.
That was a dufus
“Who ARE you pretty little girl? All alllooone?”
What…the…hell…? Is that supposed to be scary? This is about the lamest demon I have ever seen–or heard–I don’t know where he is…
“Oh god…what is it this time? A mold demon?” I have totally lost all pre-established limits for how ridiculous the forms of demons can be. They seem to get stupider and stupider.
“Of course not!! How dare you insult me!! The great Hell Demon of Darkness!” Okay, I’m sorry, but his voice is totally lame. Despite the fact I can’t see him, there is NOTHING threatening about this guy at all. I’m beginning to think it’s a prank or something. The voice is just that dumb. Imagine a fat woman trying to sound like a man, yeah, her voice sort of sounds like she’s about to burst out laughing too–that’s what it sounds like.
“Right…ok…how do I get out of here? I’ve lost my way, and I’m a priestess so I’ll kick your ass if you don’t tell me.” I’ve gotten so fowl mouthed lately. Oh well.
“P-priestess?” Yeah, he’s scared out of his mind. This should be easy enough. It’s about time I handled a demon by myself. Despite what most people might say, I CAN defend myself. …I mean, I don’t have arrows, but I can still defeat weak demons like this idiot. I just have to use my title of priestess and that should scare him into it. “…w-well–“
“I’m waiting…” so fun, I actually get to have power over the demon scum!! WITHOUT Inuyasha! So HA! …huh…footsteps in the distance…sloshing around in the pools of water…
“KAGOME!!!”
HOW DID HE GET DOWN HERE?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Despite the fact that this demon was MINE to take care of–not that I like fighting or have pride… (but this didn’t take fighting! And this way Inuyasha wouldn’t have to hold the whole “you’re nothing without me” thing over my head every time I went to my era for a break!!!)
…I HAVE TO FACE HIM AFTER ALL THAT HAS HAPPENED!!! Which is…
Wait…I forgot…it’s like I’ve had amnesia or something…it must have been really bad if I wiped it clean from my memory…
“Who are you?” Oh god–that voice!! It kills me!!!
“Inuyasha, who’s askin’?!” Well…maybe if I retrace my steps I can get away unnoticed. It’s not like I can help Inuyasha battle anyway, I don’t have my arrows… Oh fine, I have to help him–but then I have to escape undetected…
“I think he has sort of a bodiless form–like darkness or something.” GAH!!! In talked to Inuyasha without thinking!! He might try to like–TALK about–whatever happened…which…is bad I know… Every time I get near Inuyasha now I know I will die because I get this horrible feeling of anxiety… AND I KNOW SPEAKING TO HIM WAS NOT THE SMART DECISION.
Because whatever I did was really stupid and bad.
And embarrassing most likely.
“Crap, then how am I supposed to beat him then?”
Damn what did I do? I’m more curious then scared. WHAT DID I DO GOD DAMMIT?!!
“Inuyasha, what did I do…?”
“What? What are you talking about?” MAYBE IT WAS A DREAM!!! YAY!!
…or maybe he just doesn’t know what I was talking about…
“You know…um…the… thing…” Oh. He seems to get it. THAT FACE!! GAH!! IT’S SO TERRIBLE LIKE HE’S THE MOST EMBARRASSED EVER!!! HIDE!!!
Well I hid behind a hand torch I picked up.
It’s not very effective.
Okay…he hasn’t said anything yet…
“…well…um…I’m not really sure myself…” Well. His face is definitely red. Maybe it’s best if I don’t know. “…you…why are you asking me…?”
“I…don’t…remember… is…all…”
“O-oh…” WAS IT THAT BAD?!!! Huh…wait a minute…it’s sort of coming back….
I guess it’s my fault for doing the stupid dare…I don’t even know why I gave in…
And maybe that’s the BETTER question! Why did I DO it in the first place? Did somewhere, deep down, did I WANT to do that? …do I need MORE emotional crisis? I’m just going to assume it was caving in due to peer pressure and nothing much more. For my emotional well-being’s sake–I think this is like a have to…
But still…I should have realized that the results would have been bad. Cataclysmic even. And then there’s that blizzard outside. My only hope is that the apocalypse comes early and I die soon so that everyone can forget about it…
BUT THEN THE LAST THING THEY’LL HAVE TO REMEMBER ME BY IS THE POLE DANCE!!!
Oh
My
God
THERE IS NOTHING WORSE THAN THAT!!!!!!!!!!
I have to get out of here! I have to convince Inuyasha that it wasn’t some sicko, perverted, hormone driven motive which caused me to do the stupid dare to pole dance on him! If I don’t then on my tombstone it will read:
“Kagome Higorashi
Pole dancer, ho, and all around wild girl!”
……………
I wish I could go catonic!!! OHMIGOD!!! I AM SUCH AN IDIOT!!!! How could I not think about this? I’m always so practical!! I’m always so good too! I’ve always been a goodie two shoes!! I don’t DO stuff wrong!! I just DON’T!
Oh, but NOW I do!! I mean, looking back in my diary, I see terrible crap written! Like “penis” “horny” “ho”!! I mean does it get any WORSE? I don’t THINK so… The only other time I wrote “penis” was when we were learning about the reproductive system at school! (And I was the most embarrassed about it too!) But now I’m talking erections and pole dancing! I’ve turned into a slut-writer! I’m not really a slut–BUT MY WRITING IS!! It’s almost like I’ve got this sicko drive deep down and finally it has escaped…
I mean–I guess I wasn’t ever THAT much of a goodie two shoes…not as much everyone thought, anyway… But until now I was a pretty damn good girl. (see, I cuss, I’m a rebel, no worse, a ho. A pitiless ho, who will have no future but to be stuck in dysfunctional relationship after dysfunctional relationship, built on pole dancing and slutty words written on paper…) Sure, maybe a ho is what all the men want these days–but those are the perverted, sexist kind. But then the other end of the spectrum are the freakishly innocent Hojo types. I wonder where Inuyasha falls in all this? Well, despite what my friends say, I’m still not convinced Inuyasha “wants me more” because of all this.
And if he does want me more…does that mean that he’s one of the perverted types? But then, it WAS a pole dance ON him…I guess you can’t really blame him then. But still---HOW EMBARRASSING! What am I supposed to say now? I really need to get out there! I need to make sure they know I’m not a wild ho! (But, now I’m not even sure about that…)
Maybe sub-consciously I thought I could win Inuyasha over if I did the dare. …my subconscious obviously didn’t figure how INSANE I’d go from all this EMOTIONAL STRESS!!! What is WRONG WITH ME? Can’t I calculate at all the repercussions of my actions? Maybe I’m over-thinking this…maybe…maybe Inuyasha just had a neutral reaction. You know, indifferent…
But isn’t even THAT bad?
That would mean he wasn’t even attracted at all…but then he wasn’t disgusted either–but the disgust could have been ingenuine–a cover! Like usual! Neutral…that would be devastating! Like I’m not even worth a reaction! …ok, maybe I AM over thinking this…
OH GOD SOMEONE IS KNOCKING ON MY DOOR!!!
God, I promise that I will pray more. I also promise that I will give back the scarf I stole and even pay for it in full. I promise to never even say “oh my god” again as that is taking your name in vain. Just please, please grant me this one single thing before the apocalypse brings about my demise, that Inuyasha is NOT the one knocking and I won’t have to face him yet…
OH GOD!!!! I am so glad!! It’s only my friends!!
(Sorry god, you know, that whole “oh my god” promise might be a little harder than I thought…)
“Come on Kagome, you can’t hide in there forever!” Oh my god–I mean gosh–she’s SO going to give away my cover!! Inuyasha will know where I am!!
“Shut the fuck up!” Oh no. I am terrible. I am a rebel. I just said the f-word. I should be vanquished. My poor friend–though sometimes witless and annoying, did not deserve this–
“What did you just say to me–“
“Calm down, Yuka–“
“Kagome, I am KNOCKING THIS DOOR DOWN, YOU BITCH!!” Thanks, I needed that Yuka. As if I needed MORE reassurance of my being a bitch. Geez, they say if you’re a lesbian, that it’s wrong to insult you for that–WELL WHAT ABOUT BEING KAGOME? There should be a law against discriminating against Kagome Higorashis.
“What’s going on here?”
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I’d know that voice ANYWHERE!!!!!!!!!! IT’S INUYASHA!!!
OUCH!!! DAMMIT!!! DAMMIT, DAMMIT!!! I hit my head on this stupid umbrella when I tripped and fell after I tried to run…somewhere (but where can I run if Inuyasha is standing right outside the only exit???) Ow…my head… I want to cry!! This is all going horribly!! Where am I supposed to hide! How do I get away–how do I keep Inuyasha away?
“Kagome? Are you in there?”
“NO!”
Okay that was dumb. Reminder to self: think before talking. Check.
“Look, I need to talk to–“
‘OH MY GOD!!!”
“Um…what?”
“I uh…” Think of something to keep him shut up. (Hey at least he’s not catonic) “…um…”
“Are you alright?” Oh god. Now you’ve done it. Stupid ass me!! “I’m coming in there!”
OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH NO OH NO OH NO I’M TOAST!! GOOD AND BUTTERED TOAST!!!! SCREWED AS A HORNY RABBIT IN SPRING!!!!
AND I’M SICK MINDED TOO SEE THAT UP THERE? PROOF OF HOW SICK I AM!!!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH THE DOOR IS OPENING WHAT DO I DO WHAT DO I DO!!!?
Alright, well I slammed into the door as it was opening, that sort of did it, but I think I hit Inuyasha’s precious nosey…
Okay…I’m weird. But he DOES have the most precious nosey. Really, I’m being totally objective about this, despite the fact that I’m in love with him, my judgment so isn’t clouded at all. He also has the sexiest smile ever. I’m serious and–
Oh wait, the door.
Well, he can’t get in…because…because…
“I’M CHANGING!!!” That’s a good one… I need to remember that for further use.
But wait…why would I be changing in a closet??? ???
“KAGOME, NO YOU’RE NO–“
“SHUT UP YUKA, ERI WHOEVER THE HELL YOU ARE!!! I AM TOTALLY CHANGING DO I NEED TO WALK OUT THERE IN MY DAMN UNDERWEAR TO PROVE IT!!! COME IN AND SEE FOR YOURSELF I DARE YOU!!” Wow…I didn’t know my voice could be that strong and loud…I think it cracked though… I was desperate…I had to shut her up before she revealed that I was perfectly clothed and Inuyasha would be free to come in, I think it worked too, because it’s dead silent… Maybe TOO quiet…
“You dare me, eh?”
...why don’t I like how she said that?
“Yeah!” Maybe I shouldn’t have said that…but I got to get her to back down. “That’s why I’m in here, Yuka!”
“Alright, well you DID dare me didn’t you, and it IS your turn…I guess I HAVE to open this door then, don’t I?”
No.
She.
DIDN’T.
“But–I–“
“No, Yuka–come on–“ I think that’s Eri whispering. “–she’s already been embarrassed enough, Inuyasha seeing her in her underwear–that’s way too much then a girl can take!” Unfortunately, that is NOT the worst of my problems. The worst is that if she opens that door and I’m not down to my underwear, than Inuyasha will think–no–know that I’m a liar.
So which do I choose?
At this point it totally seems inevitable that Inuyasha will see me in a matter of moments.
But I can determine what he sees me as.
An innocent girl caught changing by a wicked friend: a la: Yuka.
OR
A horrible, god-awful liar, getting the payment she deserves for her crimes.
I can just run, right when Inuyasha sees me, so I can deal with it, just push right past him and my friends (I’ll kick their asses if they try to stop me) and run right up to my room and lock myself in again!
The only problem that remains is that Inuyasha will have to see me in my underwear–but hey it’s better being seen in underwear as a guiltless victim, than fully-dressed as a cowardly liar!
BUT I DON’T WANT HIM TO SEE ME IN MY UNDERWEAR!!!
“Shut up, Eri–Kagome’s not REALLY getting changed, she’s just using it as a cover up to avoid Inuyasha.”
Ha. Now she’ll SO look evil!
But isn’t that kind of mean? I mean, here she is, trying to get me to face my problems, and now I’m going to make her look like the witch of the century, when I’m the one using excuses and lying…
Oh well, I’m going to Hell anyway. I wrote penis in my diary and wondered how dog claws would be like in bed. I’m set for the fiery flames of damnation. Not much I can do now.
Alright, well, I’m stripped down to my underwear and I’m totally ready. I mean, my underwear’s nice, it’s lacy and pink, and it’s not like I’m wearing a thong (ew), so it’s not so bad. Except DAMN is it cold!! What is that DRAFT?
NO.
FRICKING.
WAY.
Oh, you will NEVER believe me, so there is SO no point in telling you.
Okay, FINE.
This is totally ridiculous though.
There’s like this passage way…or something…this is totally like some sort of twist in a plot that a struggling fan fic writer would use. It could serve as an escape, but where the hell does it lead? And why is it here? I think the umbrella was the lever to open it, though…come to think of it, I’ve never seen that umbrella leave this closet before…
You know what, my mom or grandpa or someone could totally be like a spy, and that’s why there’s this passageway.
Or maybe they’re aliens–like I thought–and this is the passage to the mother ship.
Either way, if I stand here, I’ll be seen in my underwear by Inuyasha as it’s FAR too dark in here to even have any hope of finding my stupid clothes, and if I go through the passage way I might be vaporized by illegal immigrants from Neptune, but that is definitely the better alternative.
Oh god!! Close one!! Right when I escaped into the passage way it closed behind me as I heard the door opening to the closet! Damn…how am I going to be able to see.
OH MY FUCKING GOD!!!!!!
I’m sorry but all these torches just lit right when I took a step further in! Now I see that all my writing in the dark is all slanted and curvy and jumbled.
Great.
Just as well, when I’m old it’ll probably be a blessing that I won’t be able to read the embarrassing things I wrote as a teen.
Next thing is…where the heck am I? I mean, why do we have this weird secret passageway in our house? Seriously, I thought nothing all that interesting happened in THIS era. Feudal Era, maybe, but present day? Not so much. Except for that one ghost girl and that whole Noh Mask misadventure. This weird passageway just screams “bizarro adventure like in the Feudal Era “…or something… Okay, fine, not great use of words, but whatever…I’ve been pretty good up until now.
OH dammit, Inuyasha probably has no way of finding me or getting in here–that means I’m all alone!
But…maybe that’s good, right? Because then I won’t have to face him…
OMG!!! There was this weird noise!!! That totally means that some demon is going to pop out at like any second now… Just come out already, god, rat demon or whatever you are…
NO NOT A DEMON–IT SOUNDS LIKE A BAT WHICH IS LIKE WAY WORSE!!! EW EW EW EW EW EW EW!!!! OHMIGOD WHAT AM I GOING TO DO THIS TIME? I DON’T EVEN HAVE ANY FUCKING ARROWS FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!! EW!!
Okay now I SO WISH that Inuyasha was here!!
But how dumb is that? There’s no way he could get in here…could he even find me? Sure he’s got a good sense of smell, but it’s REALLY damp in here…
…perfect breeding ground for rats…
…oh god…
…it’s sort of like…a dungeon in here…
…and there’s ALWAYS rats in dungeons…
...god, god, god, GOD!!!! RATS I HOPE NOT!!! NOT BATS, NOT RATS!!! EW!! AND BUGS TOO–PLEASE GOD NO!!! MAKE IT A DEMON!!!
I’m, going to cry!!! There’s NO WAY I’ll be saved now!! It sounds like rats!! It’s got to be rats!! What the hell is this place anyway, and why did I have to come down here? Why did grandpa or mom or whoever have to make it? Didn’t they think that they’re might be rats if they made this place? Are they insane?!
Oh well, I knew my end was near, and here it is, Inuyasha would never be able to find me here! Oh god, why am I crying? They’re just bugs right? Rats…and bats and stuff…but then again they’re WAY worse than demons–and it’s all dark in here and I AM a real idiot!! I probably deserve to rot in here!! With the rats!!
“MOO-HOO-HAA-HEH!!!”
….ok… that was SO not a rat.
That was a dufus
“Who ARE you pretty little girl? All alllooone?”
What…the…hell…? Is that supposed to be scary? This is about the lamest demon I have ever seen–or heard–I don’t know where he is…
“Oh god…what is it this time? A mold demon?” I have totally lost all pre-established limits for how ridiculous the forms of demons can be. They seem to get stupider and stupider.
“Of course not!! How dare you insult me!! The great Hell Demon of Darkness!” Okay, I’m sorry, but his voice is totally lame. Despite the fact I can’t see him, there is NOTHING threatening about this guy at all. I’m beginning to think it’s a prank or something. The voice is just that dumb. Imagine a fat woman trying to sound like a man, yeah, her voice sort of sounds like she’s about to burst out laughing too–that’s what it sounds like.
“Right…ok…how do I get out of here? I’ve lost my way, and I’m a priestess so I’ll kick your ass if you don’t tell me.” I’ve gotten so fowl mouthed lately. Oh well.
“P-priestess?” Yeah, he’s scared out of his mind. This should be easy enough. It’s about time I handled a demon by myself. Despite what most people might say, I CAN defend myself. …I mean, I don’t have arrows, but I can still defeat weak demons like this idiot. I just have to use my title of priestess and that should scare him into it. “…w-well–“
“I’m waiting…” so fun, I actually get to have power over the demon scum!! WITHOUT Inuyasha! So HA! …huh…footsteps in the distance…sloshing around in the pools of water…
“KAGOME!!!”
HOW DID HE GET DOWN HERE?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Despite the fact that this demon was MINE to take care of–not that I like fighting or have pride… (but this didn’t take fighting! And this way Inuyasha wouldn’t have to hold the whole “you’re nothing without me” thing over my head every time I went to my era for a break!!!)
…I HAVE TO FACE HIM AFTER ALL THAT HAS HAPPENED!!! Which is…
Wait…I forgot…it’s like I’ve had amnesia or something…it must have been really bad if I wiped it clean from my memory…
“Who are you?” Oh god–that voice!! It kills me!!!
“Inuyasha, who’s askin’?!” Well…maybe if I retrace my steps I can get away unnoticed. It’s not like I can help Inuyasha battle anyway, I don’t have my arrows… Oh fine, I have to help him–but then I have to escape undetected…
“I think he has sort of a bodiless form–like darkness or something.” GAH!!! In talked to Inuyasha without thinking!! He might try to like–TALK about–whatever happened…which…is bad I know… Every time I get near Inuyasha now I know I will die because I get this horrible feeling of anxiety… AND I KNOW SPEAKING TO HIM WAS NOT THE SMART DECISION.
Because whatever I did was really stupid and bad.
And embarrassing most likely.
“Crap, then how am I supposed to beat him then?”
Damn what did I do? I’m more curious then scared. WHAT DID I DO GOD DAMMIT?!!
“Inuyasha, what did I do…?”
“What? What are you talking about?” MAYBE IT WAS A DREAM!!! YAY!!
…or maybe he just doesn’t know what I was talking about…
“You know…um…the… thing…” Oh. He seems to get it. THAT FACE!! GAH!! IT’S SO TERRIBLE LIKE HE’S THE MOST EMBARRASSED EVER!!! HIDE!!!
Well I hid behind a hand torch I picked up.
It’s not very effective.
Okay…he hasn’t said anything yet…
“…well…um…I’m not really sure myself…” Well. His face is definitely red. Maybe it’s best if I don’t know. “…you…why are you asking me…?”
“I…don’t…remember… is…all…”
“O-oh…” WAS IT THAT BAD?!!! Huh…wait a minute…it’s sort of coming back….
***
So yeah, when I remembered…I think I sort of blacked out–but in any event…I wound up running blindly into the pitch black. Not safe. Not smart. But hey. I pole danced on him and here he was talking to me!!! I don’t even remember what he said… Maybe it was nothing–just barf in place of words at the very sight of me…
Sorry I couldn’t write, but I’m pretty sure whatever my reaction was…well…it was something so cataclysmic that there’d be no WAY I could write…Could you imagine all the capitals and underlines? Lots of stammering, stuttering, fainting–and whatever else might occur. It’s kind of hard to say. Lately I’ve been somewhat unpredictable. (With the whole stupid pole dance dare and what-not). My only wish is that he doesn’t succeed in finding me.
“KAGOME!!! COME BACK!!! WHERE ARE YOU?!”
Oh great, that’s him–and he’s getting closer.
WHY AM I SUCH A COWARD?
“Come back here, half breed!!” That would be the dufus demon.
“Shut UP!! I’m trying to find KAGOME!!”
“Why? So she can pole dance on you some more?”
Does EVERYONE know about that now?
Next it’s going to be the top headline in the newspaper:
“KAGOME HIGORASHI POLEDANCES ON INUYASHA, UNKNOWN BOY”
“SHUT THE FUCK UP!! Stupid demon… KAGOME!!!! Do you hear me? Answer me!”
Alright, I’m betting that the most noble thing to do right now would be to answer and let him find me. I’ll bet he’s really worried about me and it’s driving him nuts searching down in this dump for me. But what am I supposed to DO? I wish I didn’t expect so much from myself. How can I face him again? I must totally seem like a raging lunatic. Especially after forgetting than remembering what I did with most likely a fit of crazed panic…I must totally seem unstable… Which might be true… Maybe I inherited it from mom…
Okay, that’s not possible, because I already figured out a long time ago that I MUST be adopted. I mean, my whole family likes crab, and I hate it. They all are weird and psycho-happy all the time (until recently, now they’re psycho…well just psycho…except Sota who seems bizarrely unaffected), plus they like opera–BLEGH! AND they can roll their tongues, which is TOTALLY genetic trait, but I CAN’T. Total, undeniable proof that I am adopted.
HOLY CRAP!!! I’VE BEEN FOCUSING ON MY WRITING AND NOW HE’S GETTING CLOSER TO MY HIDING PLACE!!! (Which sucks might I add)
WHAT DO I DO?!!!!!! WHAT DO I DO?! OH GOD JUST TELL ME!!! TELL ME NOW!! NOW NOW NOW!!! I HAVE SUFFERED SO MUCH ALREADY!!! PLEASE TAKE ME OUT OF THIS THEATRE OF CRUELTY, OH MERCIFUL LORD!!!!
Wait, am I even Christian in the first place, what is all this crap about God anyway?
ANYWAY–WHAT DO I FUCKING DO?!!!!
Maybe–maybe…maybe, just maybe…I’m like making WAY too big a deal of things…yeah!! Inuyasha is simply trying to tell me that it’s all alright…that my pole dancing did not disgust him, but rather his outlook on me is still unwavering! That he still knows me as a goodie-two-shoes kind of gal!
…oh god, how dumb do I get?
Even if he WAS like that, deep down he’d still see me as a loose girl! Besides, things would be weird between us!! He'll act all weird and embarrassed all the time I KNOW!
…or maybe not–or–I JUST DON’T KNOW anymore…
Then there’s the whole ERECTION thing to worry about….
Oh dear lord I had forgotten that…
OH I AM TOAST I AM TOAST INSIDE THE GREAT APOCOLYPSE THAT WILL SMOTHER ME AFTER RIPPING ME APART INTO TONS OF TOASTY PIECES!!!
Oh god this is the longest minute of my life, if he turns around he’ll undoubtedly see me…
I’m doomed.
Sorry I couldn’t write, but I’m pretty sure whatever my reaction was…well…it was something so cataclysmic that there’d be no WAY I could write…Could you imagine all the capitals and underlines? Lots of stammering, stuttering, fainting–and whatever else might occur. It’s kind of hard to say. Lately I’ve been somewhat unpredictable. (With the whole stupid pole dance dare and what-not). My only wish is that he doesn’t succeed in finding me.
“KAGOME!!! COME BACK!!! WHERE ARE YOU?!”
Oh great, that’s him–and he’s getting closer.
WHY AM I SUCH A COWARD?
“Come back here, half breed!!” That would be the dufus demon.
“Shut UP!! I’m trying to find KAGOME!!”
“Why? So she can pole dance on you some more?”
Does EVERYONE know about that now?
Next it’s going to be the top headline in the newspaper:
“KAGOME HIGORASHI POLEDANCES ON INUYASHA, UNKNOWN BOY”
“SHUT THE FUCK UP!! Stupid demon… KAGOME!!!! Do you hear me? Answer me!”
Alright, I’m betting that the most noble thing to do right now would be to answer and let him find me. I’ll bet he’s really worried about me and it’s driving him nuts searching down in this dump for me. But what am I supposed to DO? I wish I didn’t expect so much from myself. How can I face him again? I must totally seem like a raging lunatic. Especially after forgetting than remembering what I did with most likely a fit of crazed panic…I must totally seem unstable… Which might be true… Maybe I inherited it from mom…
Okay, that’s not possible, because I already figured out a long time ago that I MUST be adopted. I mean, my whole family likes crab, and I hate it. They all are weird and psycho-happy all the time (until recently, now they’re psycho…well just psycho…except Sota who seems bizarrely unaffected), plus they like opera–BLEGH! AND they can roll their tongues, which is TOTALLY genetic trait, but I CAN’T. Total, undeniable proof that I am adopted.
HOLY CRAP!!! I’VE BEEN FOCUSING ON MY WRITING AND NOW HE’S GETTING CLOSER TO MY HIDING PLACE!!! (Which sucks might I add)
WHAT DO I DO?!!!!!! WHAT DO I DO?! OH GOD JUST TELL ME!!! TELL ME NOW!! NOW NOW NOW!!! I HAVE SUFFERED SO MUCH ALREADY!!! PLEASE TAKE ME OUT OF THIS THEATRE OF CRUELTY, OH MERCIFUL LORD!!!!
Wait, am I even Christian in the first place, what is all this crap about God anyway?
ANYWAY–WHAT DO I FUCKING DO?!!!!
Maybe–maybe…maybe, just maybe…I’m like making WAY too big a deal of things…yeah!! Inuyasha is simply trying to tell me that it’s all alright…that my pole dancing did not disgust him, but rather his outlook on me is still unwavering! That he still knows me as a goodie-two-shoes kind of gal!
…oh god, how dumb do I get?
Even if he WAS like that, deep down he’d still see me as a loose girl! Besides, things would be weird between us!! He'll act all weird and embarrassed all the time I KNOW!
…or maybe not–or–I JUST DON’T KNOW anymore…
Then there’s the whole ERECTION thing to worry about….
Oh dear lord I had forgotten that…
OH I AM TOAST I AM TOAST INSIDE THE GREAT APOCOLYPSE THAT WILL SMOTHER ME AFTER RIPPING ME APART INTO TONS OF TOASTY PIECES!!!
Oh god this is the longest minute of my life, if he turns around he’ll undoubtedly see me…
I’m doomed.