InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Sleep Paralysis ❯ The Unforgiven Sin ( Chapter 14 )

[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]

 

 
 
Inuyasha saw the world through a red haze. He felt trapped, in a way he couldn't escape from. His mind was clouded, everything was blurred and didn't make sense. All he could feel was this burning hunger deep inside him, something that couldn't quite be sated. And it scared him to his core.

He heard himself growling out loud vaguely, and turned his eyes downward. His gaze locked with a pair of shocking blue hues, and he felt as if his heart might stop.

Kagome…

She was speaking to him, but he just couldn't understand. There was a tugging, a darkness that obscured his mind and beckoned him to feed this burning hunger. He felt himself falling, giving in…The burning becoming a wildfire in his veins that pulsed and demanded release. It grew inside him, threatening to consume him…

Until a soft voice pierced through his mind. The desperation and sadness pulled him, the want plainly apparent in his mind.

“Inuyasha!”

Kagome…

“Inuyasha!”

The burning was receding… he was beginning to feel different, more like himself…

But a violent tug in the other direction brought the bloodlust back ten fold. His mind felt like it was about to split in half, pain becoming apparent as he struggled inside himself.

But… the purest, gentlest touch graced his lips… and the love that reached him pulled him back to himself…

He closed his eyes, solace reaching his soul in earnest as he held the small form tightly to his body as he tenderly captured her mouth.

Kagome…

Inuyasha opened his eyes to a red-faced Kagome, her sapphire eyes sparkling darkly in anger. A flush graced her cheeks and her unruly hair seemed even wilder in her aggravation.

“We went through all that through all that trouble, you might as well just take it!” Inuyasha looked down at the golden locket in his hand, both of their angry faces gazing up at him.

A small part of him clenched at the gesture, the fact she had thought of something so affectionate. But Inuyasha just couldn't accept something so feminine from her… He had to save face.

“I don't need it! Why don't you take it instead?” He shoved it firmly, but not too roughly back in to her hand and she glared at him. “Take it!”

Inuyasha became taken aback. Why would she be yelling at him for this?! His ears flattened to his head in irritation, as he scowled back at her. “No!”

Kagome released it back in to his hand, crossing her arms and stomping her foot as she looked away from him defiantly, “You can't do anything without me!”

He knew she meant it as a threat, a dumb threat. But somewhere deep inside of him a small part of him quietly admitted he agreed with her.

Inuyasha leaped away from her, crouching low on the ground and growling in clear warning to this woman as she offered him a sword. A small twinge in his mind told him he should recognize those eyes, but he just couldn't place them. That red haze had settled over him again and he was feeling threatened. He wanted to strike the woman down, but he just couldn't.

He cocked his head to the side, contemplating her in silence as she advanced toward him slowly, whispering to him. He heard her clear as daylight, but he just didn't understand.

Turning his head to the side as he sensed a powerful jyaki, he looked at the youkai who regarded him with stoic eyes.

Inuyasha looked down at his reflection in the water, golden eyes staring back at him that were filled with regret and pain, remorse at what he did.

…And he was absolutely disgusted with himself.

He hit the water harshly, trying to wash away the smell of blood. But no matter how much he rinsed, it just wouldn't go away.

He spat angrily, turning in the water to find Kagome staring at him. He sneered slightly, walking through the water towards the bank and sat down heavily on the ground. As Kagome crouched next to him and offered a towel, he averted his eyes and spoke harshly to her, “I don't need it.”

She retracted her hand slowly, and then looked out toward the setting sun that sparkled off the small lake before them. Inuyasha held a small breath, staring heatedly at the ground. She must hate me. She must think I'm so fucking disgusting…

Slowly clenching and unclenching his fist, he spoke to her without looking towards her. “You don't have to force yourself to come near me.”

A look of surprise crossed her eyes as she turned her head towards him, and when he turned to meet her gaze a look of utmost sadness laid there. And it tore at his heart strings, leaving him feeling numbed and exposed at what he'd done.

He knew she could see right through him, and see the hurt that laid there.

“What is it?! You're all acting as if something's wrong! I'm sorry, but I don't give a fuck about what I did!” He screamed at her, the fury he felt with himself spilling over and falling into her. But she sat there, silently, understanding as she looked at him with sympathetic eyes. And all she had to say to make him stop was speak his name ever so softly…

His jaw snapped shut and he turned to look away from her, glaring at some random tree. But when he felt her sit behind him, he gasped quietly in surprise as she leaned against his back and set a reassuring hand on his shoulder. Again, she said his name so tenderly… She even said she understood.

But how could she?

Kagome… I can't remember what I did when I transformed… That didn't happen before… Next time, my claws… may rip you apart as well…

~~~*~~~

Inuyas ha bolted up in bed, perspiration beading along his brow as he took shallow, quick breaths to calm his racing heart.

“Inu… you okay?” He turned his head down at Kagome, staring at her in confusion. Blue eyes sparkled at him with concern in the dark of his room, and he leaned in closely, settling his body above hers. His face was inches from her own, as he stared intently in to her eyes, trying to understand. Weren't her eyes supposed to be brown? Why were they that sapphire color?

Why was he dreaming of Kagome like this to begin with?

He knew there was more to these dreams than this… there had to be. The memory of his dream with the small child struck him and he pulled back from Kagome, who was looking at him in increasing worry.

“Inuyasha…?”

Inuyasha ran his hands over his face, breathing heavily, trying to make sense of it all. He flinched when he felt her warm hand touch his shoulder, just like she had in his dream, and he looked at her. Her face scrunched up in sympathy, and he didn't know what she saw there… but whatever it was, it caused her sadness.

The look… she gave him that same sympathetic look she had, just like his dream. But she reached for him, and gently cupped his face with her hand, smoothing his cheek over lovingly with her thumb.

He drew his eyebrows together, reaching out for her and brought her smaller body to him as he captured her mouth desperately. He wanted to drown out his confusion inside her. Inuyasha plunged his tongue into her warm mouth, tasting her sweetness as she moaned in to him.

Carefully, Inuyasha laid her down on the bed and covered her body with his own, grinding down into her with his hips. She whimpered as he nipped at her lower lip, tangling her hands in to his hair.

When he recaptured her mouth, Inuyasha made sure to devour her for a long time to be sure she really was with him, and that she was no dream.


 

 
~~~*~~~

 
&nbs p;
Kagome fiddled with a piece of Inuyasha's hair, staring at the side of his face. It was hard set in to a look of concentration, and Kagome was every bit sure that it was because of the dream he had last night. “Inuyasha, you sure you're okay?” Inuyasha stared in to his locker, knowing it was useless to hide it from Kagome. She could see right through him, no matter how well he fooled everyone else.

“No… Kags, I'm not sure.” He slammed his locker shut, turning to look at her concerned face. “Besides, I'm sure you had a dream too, didn't you? Why else would you have been awake?” Kagome flushed and shrugged, looking away, “Hey, we were talking about you here, not me…”

Inuyasha frowned, grasping her chin gently as he turned her face back toward him. “This isn't just about you or me anymore Kagome. It's about us… and you'd do well to remember that, because we can't do this on our own anymore…” Kagome nodded, in agreement… he was sure… Because they both knew too well how it felt to be alone.

Dipping his head low, he was about to kiss her when he heard an obnoxious squeal interrupt them.

“Inuyasha! What are you doing with that… that girl?” Kimiko stomped up to him, glaring at him angrily. Inuyasha sighed, rubbing the bridge of his nose. He had thought he had heard the last of her, and she had finally given up.

Apparently not.

“We're together now, Kimiko. That's what. And before you rudely interrupted I was about to remind her of that. Now if you don't mind…” Inuyasha threw his arm around Kagome, pulling her close to him and walked away from his ex. Kagome grinned, looking up at him and whispered, “Nicely done.”

Inuyasha raised a brow, looking down at her, “What do you mean?”

Kagome shrugged, continuing to smile, “I mean nice cover… that's what I mean.”

Inuyasha smirked down at her, a mischievous look in his eye, “…who said I was lying?”

Kagome promptly just blushed and snapped her jaw shut, causing him to chuckle a bit.

Despite everything, anytime he got Kagome to blush it was absolutely priceless.

 
 
~~~*~~~

 
  ;
Kagome had her head bent over her work… it was the second to final period before school let out, and she was anxious to leave to go home with Inuyasha. It motivated her to get her schoolwork done faster so she would have more time to spend with him, because the more she pretty much lived there the more Sesshomaru took her under his wing as his little sister again. And he wouldn't let the two time alone until he was sure every bit of homework was done.

“Higurashi, Kagome?” Kagome lifted her head quickly at the sound of her name, puzzlement settling on her face. No one ever addressed her really, not even the teachers. But a personnel, probably from the office, had their head stuck in the door and was scanning the room.

“Uh, that's me sir,” she raised her hand slowly, looking quietly at the man.

He nodded and went, “Ah. Come with me please.”

Kagome shot a look to Sango who sat on the other side of the room, and the girl just shrugged helplessly, giving her a look of `what did you do?'

Kagome shrugged just as helplessly back, shooting her a replying look that said `I don't know.'

Kagome gathered her things, slowly shoving them in her satchel as she slung it over her shoulder and made way to the man.

The man waited for her, and then began down the hall to the office. “You have a phone call from your mother in the office, Higurashi.”

Kagome's eyes widened in surprise. My mother…?

As Kagome entered, she was lead to a phone that was off the receiver for her. She reached for it timidly, her hand shaking slightly as she placed it gingerly against her ear.

“…Hello?”

“Kagome? Is that you?” Her mother's voice echoed from the earpiece. Kagome shuddered… why did she have a bad feeling?

“Yes, mama, it's me.”

“…Why haven't you been home?” Kagome started sweating slightly, unsure of how to respond.

“I've… been spending the nights at friends' houses, you know…”

Her mother was silent, as if that hadn't satisfied her enough.

“I… I'm sorry?”

“It's all right. I just wanted to know why…”

Kagome's eyes filled with tears… she didn't even understand it herself. She just felt so… insecure, so unwanted there. How was she to explain that?

“Mama… I don't want to talk about it here, in school…”

“Kagome, please. I need to know.”

Kagome drew in a deep breath… why couldn't her mother understand? She just wasn't comfortable here.

“Mama… I don't feel safe there… I feel so… unneeded there…”

A pregnant pause lingered after she spoke those words. Those honest words… More than any she had spoken to her mother since her father had died so long ago it seemed…

“…Are you safe where you are?” Kagome frowned a little, trying to catch the words better… it almost seemed as if her mother's voice was cracking.

“…yes. Very much so…”

Another pause.

“…All right. Come by and see us soon then, if only to visit…” Kagome blinked harshly, trying to keep the tears from falling.

“Mama…!”

But a clicking sound and soft buzz followed, and she knew her mother had hung up. Kagome was half tempted to slam the phone down on the hanger, but instead she placed it down gently… and stood there staring at it a moment before excusing herself from the office.

She then walked down the hall, to the bathroom. There, she went into a vacant stall, locked the door, and went to the far wall. Leaning against it, she slid down it to the floor and let out a choked sob that was followed by another… and another… and before she knew it, she cried all the way through her last period, but somehow she couldn't find it in herself to really give a damn…
 
 
 
Chapter XIV: The Unforgiven Sin

 
 
Inuyasha saw the world through a red haze. He felt trapped, in a way he couldn't escape from. His mind was clouded, everything was blurred and didn't make sense. All he could feel was this burning hunger deep inside him, something that couldn't quite be sated. And it scared him to his core.

He heard himself growling out loud vaguely, and turned his eyes downward. His gaze locked with a pair of shocking blue hues, and he felt as if his heart might stop.

Kagome…

She was speaking to him, but he just couldn't understand. There was a tugging, a darkness that obscured his mind and beckoned him to feed this burning hunger. He felt himself falling, giving in…The burning becoming a wildfire in his veins that pulsed and demanded release. It grew inside him, threatening to consume him…

Until a soft voice pierced through his mind. The desperation and sadness pulled him, the want plainly apparent in his mind.

“Inuyasha!”

Kagome…

R 20;Inuyasha!”

The burning was receding… he was beginning to feel different, more like himself…

But a violent tug in the other direction brought the bloodlust back ten fold. His mind felt like it was about to split in half, pain becoming apparent as he struggled inside himself.

But… the purest, gentlest touch graced his lips… and the love that reached him pulled him back to himself…

He closed his eyes, solace reaching his soul in earnest as he held the small form tightly to his body as he tenderly captured her mouth.

Kagome…

Inuyasha opened his eyes to a red-faced Kagome, her sapphire eyes sparkling darkly in anger. A flush graced her cheeks and her unruly hair seemed even wilder in her aggravation.

“We went through all that through all that trouble, you might as well just take it!” Inuyasha looked down at the golden locket in his hand, both of their angry faces gazing up at him.

A small part of him clenched at the gesture, the fact she had thought of something so affectionate. But Inuyasha just couldn't accept something so feminine from her… He had to save face.

“I don't need it! Why don't you take it instead?” He shoved it firmly, but not too roughly back in to her hand and she glared at him. “Take it!”

Inuyasha became taken aback. Why would she be yelling at him for this?! His ears flattened to his head in irritation, as he scowled back at her. “No!”

Kagome released it back in to his hand, crossing her arms and stomping her foot as she looked away from him defiantly, “You can't do anything without me!”

He knew she meant it as a threat, a dumb threat. But somewhere deep inside of him a small part of him quietly admitted he agreed with her.

Inuyasha leaped away from her, crouching low on the ground and growling in clear warning to this woman as she offered him a sword. A small twinge in his mind told him he should recognize those eyes, but he just couldn't place them. That red haze had settled over him again and he was feeling threatened. He wanted to strike the woman down, but he just couldn't.

He cocked his head to the side, contemplating her in silence as she advanced toward him slowly, whispering to him. He heard her clear as daylight, but he just didn't understand.

Turning his head to the side as he sensed a powerful jyaki, he looked at the youkai who regarded him with stoic eyes.

Inuyasha looked down at his reflection in the water, golden eyes staring back at him that were filled with regret and pain, remorse at what he did.

…And he was absolutely disgusted with himself.

He hit the water harshly, trying to wash away the smell of blood. But no matter how much he rinsed, it just wouldn't go away.

He spat angrily, turning in the water to find Kagome staring at him. He sneered slightly, walking through the water towards the bank and sat down heavily on the ground. As Kagome crouched next to him and offered a towel, he averted his eyes and spoke harshly to her, “I don't need it.”

She retracted her hand slowly, and then looked out toward the setting sun that sparkled off the small lake before them. Inuyasha held a small breath, staring heatedly at the ground. She must hate me. She must think I'm so fucking disgusting…

Slowly clenching and unclenching his fist, he spoke to her without looking towards her. “You don't have to force yourself to come near me.”

A look of surprise crossed her eyes as she turned her head towards him, and when he turned to meet her gaze a look of utmost sadness laid there. And it tore at his heart strings, leaving him feeling numbed and exposed at what he'd done.

He knew she could see right through him, and see the hurt that laid there.

“What is it?! You're all acting as if something's wrong! I'm sorry, but I don't give a fuck about what I did!” He screamed at her, the fury he felt with himself spilling over and falling into her. But she sat there, silently, understanding as she looked at him with sympathetic eyes. And all she had to say to make him stop was speak his name ever so softly…

His jaw snapped shut and he turned to look away from her, glaring at some random tree. But when he felt her sit behind him, he gasped quietly in surprise as she leaned against his back and set a reassuring hand on his shoulder. Again, she said his name so tenderly… She even said she understood.

But how could she?

Kagome… I can't remember what I did when I transformed… That didn't happen before… Next time, my claws… may rip you apart as well…

~~~*~~~

Inuyasha bolted up in bed, perspiration beading along his brow as he took shallow, quick breaths to calm his racing heart.

“Inu… you okay?” He turned his head down at Kagome, staring at her in confusion. Blue eyes sparkled at him with concern in the dark of his room, and he leaned in closely, settling his body above hers. His face was inches from her own, as he stared intently in to her eyes, trying to understand. Weren't her eyes supposed to be brown? Why were they that sapphire color?

Why was he dreaming of Kagome like this to begin with?

He knew there was more to these dreams than this… there had to be. The memory of his dream with the small child struck him and he pulled back from Kagome, who was looking at him in increasing worry.

“Inuyasha…?”

Inuyasha ran his hands over his face, breathing heavily, trying to make sense of it all. He flinched when he felt her warm hand touch his shoulder, just like she had in his dream, and he looked at her. Her face scrunched up in sympathy, and he didn't know what she saw there… but whatever it was, it caused her sadness.

The look… she gave him that same sympathetic look she had, just like his dream. But she reached for him, and gently cupped his face with her hand, smoothing his cheek over lovingly with her thumb.

He drew his eyebrows together, reaching out for her and brought her smaller body to him as he captured her mouth desperately. He wanted to drown out his confusion inside her. Inuyasha plunged his tongue into her warm mouth, tasting her sweetness as she moaned in to him.

Carefully, Inuyasha laid her down on the bed and covered her body with his own, grinding down into her with his hips. She whimpered as he nipped at her lower lip, tangling her hands in to his hair.

When he recaptured her mouth, Inuyasha made sure to devour her for a long time to be sure she really was with him, and that she was no dream.

 

 
~~~*~~~

 
 
Kagome fiddled with a piece of Inuyasha's hair, staring at the side of his face. It was hard set in to a look of concentration, and Kagome was every bit sure that it was because of the dream he had last night. “Inuyasha, you sure you're okay?” Inuyasha stared in to his locker, knowing it was useless to hide it from Kagome. She could see right through him, no matter how well he fooled everyone else.

“No… Kags, I'm not sure.” He slammed his locker shut, turning to look at her concerned face. “Besides, I'm sure you had a dream too, didn't you? Why else would you have been awake?” Kagome flushed and shrugged, looking away, “Hey, we were talking about you here, not me…”

Inuyasha frowned, grasping her chin gently as he turned her face back toward him. “This isn't just about you or me anymore Kagome. It's about us… and you'd do well to remember that, because we can't do this on our own anymore…” Kagome nodded, in agreement… he was sure… Because they both knew too well how it felt to be alone.

Dipping his head low, he was about to kiss her when he heard an obnoxious squeal interrupt them.

“Inuyasha! What are you doing with that… that girl?” Kimiko stomped up to him, glaring at him angrily. Inuyasha sighed, rubbing the bridge of his nose. He had thought he had heard the last of her, and she had finally given up.

Apparently not.

“We're together now, Kimiko. That's what. And before you rudely interrupted I was about to remind her of that. Now if you don't mind…” Inuyasha threw his arm around Kagome, pulling her close to him and walked away from his ex. Kagome grinned, looking up at him and whispered, “Nicely done.”

Inuyasha raised a brow, looking down at her, “What do you mean?”

Kagome shrugged, continuing to smile, “I mean nice cover… that's what I mean.”

Inuyasha smirked down at her, a mischievous look in his eye, “…who said I was lying?”

Kagome promptly just blushed and snapped her jaw shut, causing him to chuckle a bit.

Despite everything, anytime he got Kagome to blush it was absolutely priceless.

 
 
~~~*~~~

 
 
Kagome had her head bent over her work… it was the second to final period before school let out, and she was anxious to leave to go home with Inuyasha. It motivated her to get her schoolwork done faster so she would have more time to spend with him, because the more she pretty much lived there the more Sesshomaru took her under his wing as his little sister again. And he wouldn't let the two time alone until he was sure every bit of homework was done.

“Higurashi, Kagome?” Kagome lifted her head quickly at the sound of her name, puzzlement settling on her face. No one ever addressed her really, not even the teachers. But a personnel, probably from the office, had their head stuck in the door and was scanning the room.

“Uh, that's me sir,” she raised her hand slowly, looking quietly at the man.

He nodded and went, “Ah. Come with me please.”

Kagome shot a look to Sango who sat on the other side of the room, and the girl just shrugged helplessly, giving her a look of `what did you do?'

Kagome shrugged just as helplessly back, shooting her a replying look that said `I don't know.'

Kagome gathered her things, slowly shoving them in her satchel as she slung it over her shoulder and made way to the man.

The man waited for her, and then began down the hall to the office. “You have a phone call from your mother in the office, Higurashi.”

Kagome's eyes widened in surprise. My mother…?

As Kagome entered, she was lead to a phone that was off the receiver for her. She reached for it timidly, her hand shaking slightly as she placed it gingerly against her ear.

“…Hello?”

“Kagome? Is that you?” Her mother's voice echoed from the earpiece. Kagome shuddered… why did she have a bad feeling?
 
“Yes, mama, it's me.”

“…Why haven't you been home?” Kagome started sweating slightly, unsure of how to respond.

“I've… been spending the nights at friends' houses, you know…”

Her mother was silent, as if that hadn't satisfied her enough.

“I… I'm sorry?”

“It's all right. I just wanted to know why…”

Kagome's eyes filled with tears… she didn't even understand it herself. She just felt so… insecure, so unwanted there. How was she to explain that?

“Mama… I don't want to talk about it here, in school…”

“Kagome, please. I need to know.”

Kagome drew in a deep breath… why couldn't her mother understand? She just wasn't comfortable here.

“Mama… I don't feel safe there… I feel so… unneeded there…”

A pregnant pause lingered after she spoke those words. Those honest words… More than any she had spoken to her mother since her father had died so long ago it seemed…

“…Are you safe where you are?" Kagome frowned a little, trying to catch the words better… it almost seemed as if her mother's voice was cracking.

“…yes. Very much so…”

Another pause.

“…All right. Come by and see us soon then, if only to visit…” Kagome blinked harshly, trying to keep the tears from falling.

“Mama…!”

But a clicking sound and soft buzz followed, and she knew her mother had hung up. Kagome was half tempted to slam the phone down on the hanger, but instead she placed it down gently… and stood there staring at it a moment before excusing herself from the office.

She then walked down the hall, to the bathroom. There, she went into a vacant stall, locked the door, and went to the far wall. Leaning against it, she slid down it to the floor and let out a choked sob that was followed by another… and another… and before she knew it, she cried all the way through her last period, but somehow she couldn't find it in herself to really give a damn…

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