Kingdom Hearts Fan Fiction ❯ Kingdom Hearts Truth Or Dare! ❯ Part Two ( Chapter 2 )

Krow: Welcome back, my loyal followers!

Ansem: You mean MY loyal followers.

Krow: Yeah, whatever. Thank you for joining us for Part Two of the Kingdom Hearts Truth or Dare Saga. If you read the bonus chapter before this… then yay for you! Good job! If you didn't… yay for you too! I'm not exactly good at writing yaoi/shounen-ai scenes… @-@

Larxene: What about the other people you're supposed to introduce?

Krow: Oh, yes. Almost forgot about them. Come on over, you two!

Lexaeus: …

Zexion: Hello…

Krow: Gee, not very social…

Larxene: Most of us don't talk to people other than other members of the Organization. Except for…

Vexen: ZEXI-POO! *He runs from out of nowhere, attaching himself to Zexion and dangling from him like a toddler.*

Zexion: Oh no…

Axel: Hey, where did this freak come from? Isn't he supposed to be with the other psychopaths?

Vexen: I love your name soooo much, Zexi! It has-

Larxene: Yes, we know. There's an `x' in it…

Vexen: I've been thinking lately about ALL THE LOVELY WORDS that have an `x' in them! There's x-ray, xylophone, t-rex, explore, exist, exclude, exclamation, experience, exhale, examine, execute, extreme, excellent, explode, oxen, axe, hexagon, maximum, saxophone, fax, taxes, earwax, relax, climax, flex, tuxedo, deluxe, box, fix, laxative, Mexican, six, wax, text, supercalafragilisticexpealadocious… and… uh…

Krow: Vexen, that last word doesn't even exist…

Vexen: *Isn't even paying attention.* and xanthophyllous!

*Big, long, dreadful silence…*

Axel: … would you mind speaking English, please?

Vexen: It's the yellow crystalline pigment in tree leaves! :D

Larxene: … Somebody save us…

Vexen: Xingu! That's a river in Brazil! :D

Krow: Vexen, why are you here?

Vexen: I'm looking for a rhino. Have you seen one?

Lexaeus: Vexen, there aren't any rhinos on the Destiny Islands.

Vexen: But-but-but I have to find one! ;-;

Riku: Why don't you head for the savanna, near Pride Rock? I'm sure there's rhinos there.

*Everyone turns around, quite startled by the presence of the two boys nearing. Riku and Sora, still holding hands, walk up to the rest.*

Krow: Hello, aren't you two supposed to be with the… other people?

Sora: Well, yes. The only problem is we kinda… scared them away, you see? *He flashes his doofy grin and Krow suddenly notices the two holding hands.*

Krow: Sora, would you mind explaining WHY you're holding hands with… Riku?

*Sora blinks and looks at Riku, who just stares back. They both look down at their hands and… blink again.*

Sora: Well…

Riku: It's kind of like this…

Sora: You see, we were sittin' in the cage…

Riku: With the others.

Sora: And then we-

Vexen: Told everyone that you wanted to go find Vexen and help him catch a rhino!

Sora: VEXEN! What are you doing here?

Axel: We should be asking that to you, dolt.

Riku: Hey, watch it.

*As the rest of the group seems to be arguing in some way, Krow can be seen observing Sora and Riku, her maroon eyes blinking slowly as she rubs her chin in thought. A sudden smirk comes over her face as she decides to step in.*

Krow: Hey, Riku.

Riku: Uh-… yeah?

Krow: I dare you, right here and now, to share a Paopu fruit with Sora. Actually, scratch that. I COMMAND you to share a Paopu fruit with Sora.

Riku: W-what?

Krow: You heard me. Share a Paopu fruit with Sora… unless you'd rather share it with Vexen.

Vexen: Paopu fruitloops!

*A short silence follows this.*

Riku: Why do you want me to share a Paopu fruit with him, Krow-san?

Krow: Why should I explain myself?

Sora: Because he asked nicely!

Krow: Sora… don't make me shove a seagull egg down your throat.

Sora: You can't make me do anything!

Krow: Wanna bet?

Vexen: Bet? Ooooh, I love poker! Let's play!

Krow: …. Not now, Vexen.

Sora: Yeah, I wanna bet!

Krow: Look, kid. I, being the authoress of this fanfic, can make you say or do anything I want. Would you like me to prove it?

Sora: Why you nasty big cup of noodles!

*Everyone except Krow looks at Sora with a startled expression on their faces.*

Sora: I mean-… Why you big nasty cup of noodles! … Cup of noodles! … Cu-… noodl-… cup o'… cu-…ARG! I can't say anything but cup of noodles!

Krow: *She gives him a look like “I told you so…”.*

Sora: Riku, I hate you so much. I don't EVER want to see your face again and I'll NEVER share a Paopu fruit with you, even if you were the last person on earth!

Riku: *He stares blankly.* …

Sora: No! I didn't mean to say that. I meant to say I DON'T want to share… Yes, I don't. Don't… do… not… I don't…

Riku: *He turns and looks at Krow.* Are you making him say that… or is he serious?

Krow: It's just me. *She grins.* Look what else I can do.

Sora: I'm nothing but a spoiled brat who thinks he's the strongest, and the best looking, boy on in the universe.

*Some of the characters start to snicker behind Sora's back.*

Sora: Hey! I didn't mean to say that I'm the world's greatest fishbowl!

Everyone except Krow: O.O;;;

Sora: I eat seaweed for dessert.

Larxene: ….?

Sora: Ansem, I love you so much. You shine like a dog on a leash… or is it a leash on a dog? But besides the point, your eyes! They radiate with a kind of aura that makes me want to puke! It binds me to your foot like an elephant on a grumpy shoe.

Ansem: … o.o?

Sora: And your lips, they remind me of sugar and rice! I mean sugar and spice!

Zexion: I'm not sure anymore if he's serious… or just delirious.

Sora: You might be a rose that you put on your hose, I mean toes… I mean NOSE!

Krow: *She's just standing there, a big grin on her face as she watches the reactions of the other characters.*

Axel: Wait a minute… why are there three of the silver boy here?

*All of the characters, including Krow, turn around to see not one Riku near Sora… but three. Everyone stares and the Riku trio stare back.*

Riku #1: …What are YOU staring at?

Riku #2: Staring at us, obviously. Would you like to give me a good reason why you're impersonating me, you punk?

Riku #1: Impersonating? You must be joking. If anyone's the punk around here, it's you. You're definitely the imposter.

Riku #2: Why don't you prove it, punk?

Riku #3: … What's going on? X-x

Sora: … Which one of you is the real Riku? You can't ALL be Riku…. Can you?

Riku #2: I'm Riku, you dolt! Can't you-

Riku #3: Excuse me, but I think I am the real Riku here. I've known Sora since I was a kid.

Riku #2: So have I!

Riku #1: …I really don't care.

Riku #2: Well, shouldn't you care? If you're the real Riku, which I doubt you are, then you would care about Sora.

Riku #1: … And your point being?

Riku #2: Don't you like Sora?

Riku #1: If I did, I surely wouldn't say it aloud to a group whose brains are filled with nothing but mothballs.

Riku #3: What do mothballs look like, exactly?

Krow: That's a very good question. I used to find them under my bed when I was young.

Riku #1: Well why don't you indulge us? We're all ears.

Krow: If I wasn't mistaken, I would have thought you to be at first glace the real Riku.

Riku #1: …Explain.

Vexen: That's a word I forgot! Explain! *He sighs dreamily.* Hearing the sounds from my mouth makes me want to faint and slip into a dream…

Larxene: Why don't you all do us a favor and do exactly that.

Vexen: My, my! Another word: Exactly!

Everyone Else: …

Riku #1: Go on and explain, woman.

Krow: Excuse me, but you will not address to me that way.

Riku #1: How would you like me to address you, then? M'lady? Your Royal Highness? Your Majesty? You insolent b-

Krow: That's quite enough, thank you. I will conclude that number one is DEFINITELY not Riku.

Axel: Now that I think about it, he reminds me of the Riku that Vexen created during the Castle Oblivion saga.

Riku #1: … Aye, that would be me. I am but a simple imitation of the real thing. I can never become my own person. My life is-

Krow: Yes, yes, we don't care. Now we've narrowed down the choices to Two and Three.

Riku #2: *He huffs somewhat, clearly annoyed with the situation.*

Riku #3: *His expression isn't much different than number two's. Although there seems to be a faint glimmer of daydreaming behind the two turquoise orbs.*

Krow: I say this is where Sora comes in. C'mere, Tiger.

Sora: *He stares blankly at Krow as if he didn't trust her to any end, but obeyed with a slight hesitation.*

Krow: *She smiles as she puts an arm around Sora's shoulders.* Ok, silver-haired boys…

Ansem: I have silver hair.

Krow: Not including you.

Vexen: Is my hair silver?

Axel: Look in a mirror, then tell us what you think.

Krow: ANYWAYS, the two remaining Riku people. You have one chance to prove to me you are the one and only Riku… otherwise, I'll slaughter this boy right here.

Sora: *His eyes widen…*

Riku #2: W-wait a minute! You can't do that!

Riku #3: That's considered cruelty to animals!

Sora: … Are you calling me an animal?

Krow: Right, if you don't believe me… I can always prove my point right here… *Her hand darts swiftly to a black rapier at her waist; a long black crow feather hangs from its hilt, and it flutters helplessly in the air as the sword is drawn.*

Riku #2: Ho, woah…. Wait a minute there. You honestly don't think you can just walk around, brandishing your sword at anyone you please.

Krow: And you will speak when spoken to, you hear me?

Riku #2: But…but Krow-san-

Krow: Ah-HA! You're the real Riku. Only one would call me Krow-san.

*There is a long dreadful silence as everyone stares at the crazy authoress.*

Krow: If you've got a problem, then hurry up and say it. : /

Sora: Yeah, I've got a problem. I'm tired of saying cup of noodles.

Krow: You haven't said `cup of noodles' for the last half hour.

Sora: …. So?

Riku: …..

Krow: Sora, you're such a dweeb at times. -.-;;

Sora: Yeah, thanks. : /

Ansem: I'm tired. Can I go take a nap?

Krow: If it'll get you to shut up, sure. Take a hike.

Ansem: I don't want to take a hike.

Krow: Whatever, take a bed.

Marluxia: A bed sounds good right about now…

Krow: Fine, whatever. Why don't we all go take a bed break and come back in another… say, five weeks to finish this game?

Riku: Sounds good to me.

Krow: Right, class dismissed.