Kingdom Hearts Fan Fiction ❯ Kingdom Hearts Truth Or Dare! ❯ Part Three ( Chapter 3 )

Krow: Aaaaand we're back, ready to rumble and finally finish up this… story thing.

Larxene: Are you inquiring that we're nothing but a bunch of words on a computer screen?

Krow: You are, but I'm not.

Sora: …. Uwwahh. ;__;

Riku: You know, if we all lived on Venus, we'd be gaseous.

Sora: Ewww, Riku! That's gross!

Donald: Waaaakkk!

Goofy: … Sorry, that was me.

Krow: UGH! Now it stinks in here!

Larxene: Someone get the fan, quick. >.>

Sora: I'm a fan.

Larxene: … What?

Sora: I'm a fan!

Krow: If you're a fan, hurry up and blow this all away!

Sora: Sure……. *There is a few moments of silence before…*

Sora: … *Poot*

Krow: AGHH!!

Goofy: It wasn't me!

Krow: *She yells a bit more before stumbling around with her hands over her nose. The air is now as thick as fog and she can't even see an inch in front of her face. All of a sudden.. she bumps into someone.*

Krow: WATCH IT!

*As the fog slowly begins to clear, Krow suddenly blinks in horror.*

Zelos: Hewwo, my beautiful hunny.

Krow: NOOO!! Not you again!!

Riku: Sora? Sora?! Where are you, Sora?

Vexen: Oooooh, FOG!

Larxene: I can't see a thing in front of my face.

Riku: SORA?!

Sora: … One bottle of pop, two bottle of pop, three bottle of pop, four bottle of pop…

Axel: This is absolutely ridiculous. *He suddenly brings out his chakaram-like things and begins to rotate them at a high speed, easily blowing the fog away.*

*The whole group finds themselves facing in odd directions. For instance, Sora is in the water with it up to his abdomen, Donald is standing in front of a tree, and Vexen is standing in the middle with a spastic look on his face. Then the group noticed a strange red-haired man drawing a flailing Krow against his body with a smile.*

Riku: … When did he get here?

Sora: Woah, is he from Castle Oblivion? He looks like some fantasy warrior from some fantasy world!

Riku: … And what am I, chopped liver?

Sora: I dunno, are you?

Riku: Last time I checked the refrigerator, no.

Krow: Would you mind sparing some time and SAVE YOUR AUTHORESS FROM BEING KIDNAPPED?!

Sora: Kidnapped? Who's being kidnapped?

Krow: Me!

Sora: Me?

Krow: Yes! I mean- NO! Me as in me, Krow, the angel slayer!

*All of a sudden, the Trumpeters rush back in with their highly decorated trumpets and begin to play “Hall of the Mountain King” as fast as they possibly can. Trumpeter #13 then begins to hack and wheeze, not capable of playing so devilishly fast.*

Trumpeter #13: *Cough. Hack. Wheeze.* Dude, who picked this song for us to play?! And why so fast?!

Trumpeter #29: Yeah, this is dumb! Someone call the operator!

Trumpeters #2 and #3: Hello Operator, give me number nine! And if you disconnect me, I'll kick you from behind!

Trumpeter #17: Row, row, row your boat. Gently down the stream. Throw your sister overboard, and listen to her scream-

Trumpeter #18: -And five days later, she'll be floatin' down the Delaware, chewin' on her underwear, doesn't have another pair! Ten days later, she'll be eaten by a polar bear, and that's how the polar bear died!

Trumpeter #5: Toot toot!

*The Trumpeters all skitter back out, vanishing off into the horizon and leaving the rest of the cast completely slack-jawed.*

Sora: … What was that all about?

Axel: NOO! She's gone!

Sora: Huh? Who's gone?

Axel: My precious!

*All off a sudden, Gollum jumps into the screen, making gurgling noises and slapping a fish about.*

Everyone: ………..

*And then Gollum leaves.*

Sora: … I'm scared.

Axel: I lost her! I'll never forgive myself for this!

Riku: Sora, Krow's missing. We let Mr. Romeo get away.

Sora: So? Who needs that big nasty cup-of-noodles? …. NO! NOT AGAIN!

Larxene: Great, that means I can invite the rest of the Organization. Krow didn't know about them till a week ago, so she forgot to bring them along. Come on in boys.

Xemnas: Ah… it's good to be here. Now I can work more on my tan.

Ansem: … Hey, it's my other half. Interesting…

Xigbar: Hmm… what is this place? Too many palm trees, I must say…

Saix: I'd say it's a hefty lot. Good place for a vacation.

Xaldin: Twirlies! *He runs about, spinning his six lances.*

Demyx: Uh… great, I think they picked the wrong guys for this task. I really shouldn't be here… ACK! *He points at Sora.* Not him!!

Sora: …. Oh, it's you.

Luxord: Ahaha… anyone up for a game of cards?

Vexen: Oooh! I wanna play Poker!

Luxord: Bring it on, hotshot.

Roxas: … This place seems familiar.

Sora: Are you all here to play Truth or Dare too? Great, because the authoress just left and that means we can have a real party!

Vexen: Parties! YAY!

Xaldin: Can I do my twirlies?

Sora: Sure!

Xaldin: YAY!

Ansem: Hmm, is it just me, or have we completely gotten off the subject of truth or dare? Isn't that what we're here to do?

Sora: Nah, who wants to play that stupid game anyways? Krow may have brought us here to play that, but now that's she not here, we don't have to play it anymore!

Ansem: …

Tifa: Hey guys, have any of you seen Cloud?

Riku: Hello, Tifa. Hmm, Cloud is here somewhere… or he was.

Sora: Yeah, where did he run off to?

Xaldin: Twirlies!

Tifa: *Sigh…* I was really hoping to find him before this was all over…

*All of a sudden, a malevolent… and very cruel-sounding laugh rings through the air, scaring everyone half to death.*

Sora: W-what was that?!

Riku: Dunno… might have been a werewolf.

Xemnas: Hmm, who cares. The night is far away, and as long as there is sun… I can work on my tan.

Sora: Who cares about you and your stupid tan?! There might be a real live werewolf out there!

Sephiroth: *He appears behind the brunette, tapping him on the shoulder with a wolfish grin.* Yo.

Sora: AHH!

Cloud: …

Sephiroth: Boy, that was fun. Let's do it again.

Sora: No! Don't do it again!

Tifa: Cloud, there you are! What happened to you? You looked all… I dunno… flustered and stuff. Did something happen?

Cloud: …

Sephiroth: … We're not going to go there.

Cloud: … Yes.

Riku: Right, I actually want to play that game we were doing before some more. That's what we're here for.

Ansem: That's what I was wanting to do, but Cup-O'-Noodles-Boy over here had a tantrum about it.

Sora: I'm not a big nasty Cup o' Noodles!

Larxene: Sora… shut up.

Riku: Right, Ansem. Truth or dare?

Ansem: I'll take… dare. We need some excitement around here.

Riku: No kidding. Hmm, I dare you to take Vexen on a fieldtrip. Take Mr. Mopeygills with you too.

Axel: *Gloooooooom…*

Ansem: Sure. Let's go, you two. We're taking a fieldtrip to the zoo.

Vexen: Woohoo! The ZOO!!

Riku: Great, have fun.

Ansem: I'll do my best…

 

Ansem: Alright, here we are. Please do not venture too far without me, for the lions might come and eat you. Are we clear?

Axel: *Gloooooooom…*

Vexen: Sure, whatever you say. I wanna go see the penguins! Penguins!

Ansem: … Perhaps. Any requests, red-head?

Axel: *Gloooooooom…*

Ansem: Penguins it is then. *He now walks along, having to drag Axel by his arm as Vexen trails behind with a grin.*

 

*As they arrive at the penguins, they stumble upon the feeder guy tossing fish into the water.*

Vexen: Hellooooo, Mr. Feeder!

Mr. Feeder: Hello, Vexen.

Ansem: … You know him?

Vexen: Uh-huh! We went to preschool together! ^^

*A flashback starts, showing the preschoolers sitting in their desks as the teacher calls out roll call.*

Teacher: Jimmy?

Jimmy: Here.

Teacher: Jill?

Jill: Here, M'am.

Teacher: Bobby Alphonse?

Bobby Alphonse: *Picks his nose and sniffles.* Phere…

Teacher: Vexen?

Vexen: Ooooh, my name! I'm here, Teacher! Aww, I just looooove the `x' in my name…

Teacher: … Right, we established that yesterday. Mr. Feeder?

Mr. Feeder: Here. *He gets this daydreaming look in his eyes before he turns and stares out the window.*

Teacher: Mr. Feeder, please pay attention. This isn't nap class.

Mr. Feeder: Sorry…

*End of Flashback.*

Ansem: But you're a Nobody-… oh never mind. That's nice.

Vexen: Soooo, how's Tipsy doing?

Ansem: … Tipsy?

Mr. Feeder: I'm afraid Tipsy died of H2O intolerance.

Vexen: WHAT? Tipsy… Tipsy died?!

Mr. Feeder: I'm afraid so.

Vexen: Noooo!

Ansem: Well… whoever Tipsy is, it's a shame to loose… it… him… her…

Mr. Feeder: Her. She's one of the orca whales we have here.

Ansem: But I thought this is where the penguins were.

Mr. Feeder: Yes, that is correct, but they all died off two minutes ago.

Ansem: How so?

Mr. Feeder: Mesothelioma.

Ansem: … I see.

Mr. Feeder: Yes, so we now are giving refuge to the whales.

Vexen: Cool! Can I feed them?

Mr. Feeder: Sure, just be careful. Morgan's not feeling too well today.

Vexen: Ok, I hope they like Nobodies. *He turns around and shoves Axel in the water.*

Ansem: … I don't think that was such a good idea.

Vexen: It doesn't really matter. He was moping around and doing nothing. Gotta make use of what you have, right?

Ansem: … I think you're misunderstanding that statement.

Vexen: Oh well, it doesn't matter.

*Just as Ansem is about ready to jump in and retrieve Axel before a blonde pushes him aside and dives into the water, grabbing a hold of the other's collar and jumping out.*

Axel: *Cough. Hack. Cough cough.*

Vexen: Hmm, guess the Orcas aren't hungry today.

Mr. Feeder: They normally don't eat humans.

Ansem: Or in this case, Nobodies.

Axel: *Cough hack, hackity hack hack.* R-Roxas?

Roxas: Glad you're ok, pal.

Axel: Roxas…

Roxas: Axel…

Axel: Roxas!

Roxas: Axel!

Axel: ROXAS!

Roxas: AXEL!

Axel: … I think…. I think I love you.

Ansem: … That was random.

Roxas: … I think I love you too, Axel.

Trumpeters: *All of them.* Awwwww…..

Mr. Feeder: Since when did these guys get here? *He stares at the Trumpeters, all 500 of them.*

Ansem: Don't know. They just seem to pop up randomly. Pay no attention to them.

Mr. Feeder: Ah, alright.

Vexen: Yay, a slumber party!

Ansem: … I think it's time to go home.

 

Sora: Hey guys, welcome back!

Ansem: Yes, thank you.

Sora: You missed a lot.

Ansem: So?

Sora: … Right.

Roxas: Well, now that we're all back safe and sound, what do we do?

Larxene: Well, we can't end the story until Krow comes back, so I guess we have to wait for her.

Roxas: Any clue how long that'll take?

Larxene: Nope. But I do hope it's soon.

Vexen: X is my favorite letter EVER! I just want to pick it up and hug it until I can hug it no more!

Larxene: You do that.

*Quite suddenly, a portal opens up from out of nowhere and dumps Krow face first into the sand.*

Krow: …………..

Roxas: Right on time. End this thing so we can go home.

Riku: You mean so YOU can go home. Some of us are already home.

Sora: Yeah. : /

Krow: … It burrrrnns..

Sora: ACK! BURN! STOP DROP AND ROLL, WOMAN!

Krow: I've stopped… and I've been dropped…. But I'm not rolling anywhere.

Ansem: Well, since Krow seems to be in a state of shock, I guess we'll leave the closure to… yours truly. Thank you for reading. Have a nice… day, I suppose.

Sora: BYE!