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| "Rehabilitation" Reviews/Comments [ 83 ] | | Pages (6): [ « ‹ 1 2 3 4 5 6 › » ] | Reviewed By: SparkieGoesHuzzah [MediaMiner Member] On: July 21, 2006 13:27 CDT
Comment/Review:
I also have a question. Does Ed keep the pieces of metal from the first chapter in his pocket or something?
| Reviewed By: SparkieGoesHuzzah [MediaMiner Member] On: July 21, 2006 01:48 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
I give it a ten. I loved it so much, please continue on with this story. I'd be all weepy and sad if it ended with "And his auto-mail was fixed-----THE END"
| Reviewed By: peregrine829 [MediaMiner Member] On: July 20, 2006 16:15 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
First, I'd like to say that your a wonderful author Now moving on to specifics. You really captured the essence of Ed'd personal demons, from the attempted suicide, to the lecture from Mustang, to his confrontation with Winry. The fact that he couldn't look Mustang in the eye and instead averted his gaze to the floor shows how Ed refuses to accept the truth that Al made his own choices in life and willingly chose to sacrifice himself for Ed. You also knew exactly when to inject humor into a situation to keep it from becoming too dark. Most enjoyable in that respect would be Havoc and Hughes encounter with Snape and Mustang's brief "talk" with Hawkeye in the Room of Requirement. I read both of these at least three times to savor the mental images before continuing on. Finally, what Mustang said to Ed may turn out to be my favorite line of the story: "But if you live, Ed, that is the true challenge. By living, you can repent for any sins you may have committed. You can make things right again." I am absolutely obsessed with Rurouni Kenshin and that line is almost a direct quote (on an unrelated topic, I always thought Mustang and Seijuro Hiko could have been best friends or even brothers, their personalities are so alike). I hope this review is more to your liking. I usually prefer short, succinct reviews, but I understand that it is often beneficial to hear the advice/critcism of others.
| Reviewed By: Flame Phoenix (NLI) On: July 20, 2006 13:41 CDT
Comment/Review:
Ah, yes. Sorry I haven't reviewed yet-- I've been reading this for some time now, and I'm not much of a review person, soo... ^_^;; However, as Chloe stated below, the whole story is made as plausible as it is because of how close Al was to Ed. I thought it was a little OOC for Roy to be shouting at Edward (usually he talks normally and gives the facts straight), but I can see why you would have him do that. Overall, a pretty great job with this story! (Now if only you would update Technicalities...)
| Reviewed By: timydamonkey [MediaMiner Member] On: July 20, 2006 09:54 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 9 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 8 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
This is very good. I've rated the originality 8 because, although this is certainly an interesting and original premise of a HP/FMA crossover, the actual crossover is a common idea... points for not making it the same old story like so many others, though. I'm glad Ed's got over the mopeyness. He needed a wake-up call and he's got one - because Al's sacrificing his life is pointless if Ed throws away the life that Al died saving. Ed would never react 'well' to Al's death, though I think he would possibly push a bit more to get the Stone. Then again, he hasn't much choice about where he is now. Hope that makes sense. Additionally, I like the way you haven't made Ed randomly blab his past to people he doesn't know, considering he won't even tell it to Rose - Al did that. He's a private person; if anybody found out anything about him, it's highly unlikely it'd be because he told them. Another plus point: you haven't immediately shoved Ed with Harry, Ron and Hermione. A lot of people do this and it's confusing as to why he'd end up with them right off the bat and getting on like a house on the fire. It's far too coincidental for my liking, when that happens. And you've done a great job keeping people in character... although it was a little shaky with Ed doing so much moping at first, but then Al means a LOT to Ed so it's a plausible reaction. Snape, Fuery and Hughes struck me as particularly amusing in this chapter. Enjoy your writing! -Chloe.
| Reviewed By: ChaosChiq [MediaMiner Member] On: July 20, 2006 02:33 CDT
Comment/Review:
Okay I would like to make the following corrections to my review, which I just looked over: -I was reading and trying not to laugh -You said ten words or more -be there to try and help Ed through the surgery? Thank you aaaand good night.
| Reviewed By: ChaosChiq [MediaMiner Member] On: July 20, 2006 02:30 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Okay, it's like 1:30 in the morning here and I was reading adn trying not to laugh at the same time. You said ten wordsor more so I'm writing more than ten words. My review sounds tired and dreary but please keep in mind that I'm half asleep. Okaaay so anyways I love your story so far please keep going um, hmm I dunno what to say otherwise-oh yeah, could Harry, Ron and Hermione be there to try and help Ed through the sugery? I was kinda hoping that it would help them mature, knowing that someone who's like their age can go through that. I was thinking it could make them stronger. I was tempted not to read this story because Al dies but then I just wanted to see what happens so good job. And this may sound annoying but I don't care: Update Soon! Pretty, pretty, pretty please?
| Reviewed By: peregrine829 [MediaMiner Member] On: July 15, 2006 00:28 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Damn you for killing Al!! Now that I've got that out of my system... Please update soon!! It's been a while since I've found a really good fic like this one and been able to read it cover to cover!
| Reviewed By: Moonshadow14 [MediaMiner Member] On: July 09, 2006 21:28 CDT
Comment/Review:
YES!! AN UPDATE!! And a very good one, too. And Harry's in it!! ^^ But poor Ed-chan... he's lucky Winry's there, though, since she seems to be the only person who can get through to him at all. But maybe someone at Hogwarts can find a way to bring Alphonse back, or maybe Dumbledore's death will be enough of an exchange for Al, ... but I'll just wait for you to update to find out what happens instead of making insane, and mostly highly improbable, guesses. But please update again soon so my imagination doesn't use up what little brain cells I have!! You're a great writer, so keep it up!! ^^
| Reviewed By: Moonshadow14 [MediaMiner Member] On: May 05, 2006 15:27 CDT
Comment/Review:
By the way, is Harry going to be in this, or is it just taking place at Hogwarts? Please update soon, because I really want to know what'll happen when Harry and Ed meet.
| Reviewed By: Moonshadow14 [MediaMiner Member] On: May 05, 2006 15:23 CDT
Comment/Review:
NOOOOOO!! Don't leave me hanging like that!!!!!! You're writing a fanfic with two of my favorite things in the world- very well, too, which makes it even better, not to mention the fact that there is only 1 other FMA/HP crossover fic on this website- so you CANNOT, for the sake of whatever sanity I have left, leave me hanging for much longer!!! Please please please please please update soon!!!!!!!!
| Reviewed By: perfect little girl [MediaMiner Member] On: May 01, 2006 18:49 CDT
Comment/Review:
awsome please keep it up!! and update more.
| Reviewed By: Nejispork On: April 21, 2006 11:00 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 7 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 9 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 7 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 9 of 10
Overall Rating: 8 of 10 Comment/Review:
I hope you update soon. O.O Does Edawrd get killed by evil Winry? XD
| Title: Any time now...
Reviewed By: Peregrine829 On: April 12, 2006 09:53 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 9 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
So far, its great! But when do you plan on finishing it?
| Reviewed By: perfect little girl [MediaMiner Member] On: March 17, 2006 20:09 CST
Comment/Review:
please update! i can't wait to see what happens next!!!
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