| "Falling For the Baby Sitter" Reviews/Comments [ 469 ] |
| Pages (32): [ « ‹ 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 › » ] |
Reviewed By: RedHerring [MediaMiner Member] On: October 27, 2004 23:14 EDT
Comment/Review:
It's the plot that won't die! I think I got half way through, and then got fed up with all the plot and character changes. The Kaogme you present at the beginning of the story is nothing like the Kagome you show during the middle. Sure, I'm aware that there is some character development, but the way you changed Kagome's character so drastically to suit your purposes is a little aggrivating.// And talk about plot? Plot, what plot? I see not plot. I see many minni plots. I see a few chapters on the kidnapping of Kagome's daughter. I do not see a plot that runs throughout the entire story. And the 'Kagome tries to get Inuyasha to fall in love with her' is not a enough of a substantial plot to make a good story.// I'm not saying that your writing is bad. Quite the contrary, your writing is on the higher end of the spectrum. I'm just saying that a story like that is very hard to stay with becuase of it's flighty plot(s), and flaky structure. You might want to consider dividing up your story into parts. Maybe focus on a specific plot, or goal you want accomplished in the part.
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Title: where are you
Reviewed By: Kikyou_104 [MediaMiner Member] On: October 03, 2004 16:59 EDT
Comment/Review:
where are you....ya havne't updated in a while please do cuz this is an awsome story and it would be a sad thing for you not to finish this and your other stories cuz you are and amazing and talented writer please update as soon as you can or just send us a message or something well Ja ne
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Title: Falling for the babysitter
Reviewed By: VenomousEnchantress [MediaMiner Member] On: September 01, 2004 02:48 EDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 7 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 9 of 10 Comment/Review:
Hey this is a great story I can't wait till it is finished. I can't remeber and of the questions I had while I was reading it so I might read it again to and write down any questions about the story but other then that great work to all who worked on the story. I give it 3 harry thumbs up lol.
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Reviewed By: Biganimefan1 [MediaMiner Member] On: August 29, 2004 15:42 EDT
Rating(s):Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
awwwww how sad for kag and please dont let inu leave and i want an inu kag lemon
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Reviewed By: inuyashas honey [MediaMiner Member] On: August 29, 2004 11:35 EDT
Comment/Review:
Ilove your story, but what the hell happened. Please tell me you didn't skip the lemon. So did they do it or not. There is a big gap missing here and a very important one at that. And I noticed it happened before. I can't remember what chapter, but it was the one where Miroku caught Yasha and Kags doing something and it made him real mad, but you never say what it was he saw. What were they doing. It was the same chapter when Yasha finally told Kouga about him and Kagome. You seem to be leaving out alot of improtant details. Details that I have grown to expect in your story. Details that make the story the literary marvel that it is. So please fill us in on what happened that night. I hate not knowing, and it also makes it harder to understand the characters relationships. We need to know what happened, did they do it. So that way when Yasha faces Kouga again we can better understand his inner turmoil. Update soon. Thanks
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Reviewed By: Miko no Suteki (offline) On: August 28, 2004 18:18 EDT
Rating(s):Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
yayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! its back! i was beginning to wonder, lol. awesome comeback..although ::blush::: i wish we could have seen the lemon...but at least we know it finally happened. its just, ive been readin this story all along mainly to see some serious straight lemony goodness between inu and kag, but...i dont know, it was good still! and the dancing/singing part was good too. keep up the good work, and update soon! ~*~*~Suteki~*~*~
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Reviewed By: akuma_river [MediaMiner Member] On: August 28, 2004 05:37 EDT
Comment/Review:
interesting. so who is the boss? it isn't Sesshoumaru is it?
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Reviewed By: Miztikal_Dragon nsi [MediaMiner Member] On: August 28, 2004 03:43 EDT
Comment/Review:
wow...great chappie, keep up the fantastic work. Krystal.
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Title: Nice
Reviewed By: ssp51201 [MediaMiner Member] On: August 27, 2004 22:47 EDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
I just think it's soo cute how Inu's finally realizing what it takes to raise kids, and how important it is to have a relationship as well. I love this chapter. I love his reaction to what kagome has been forced to do. It's soo priceless! I can't wait to read more! Ja ne!
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Reviewed By: midnite On: August 27, 2004 21:18 EDT
Comment/Review:
more more More MOre MORe MORE !!!!!
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Reviewed By: skeezo On: August 27, 2004 03:19 EDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 7 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 8 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 8 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 9 of 10
Overall Rating: 9 of 10 Comment/Review:
i really like this story so hurry and update please thanks
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Reviewed By: sunshine07 On: August 26, 2004 17:32 EDT
Comment/Review:
that was a great chappy......but why were kagome and inuyasha sleeping together and what was she so proccuppied about to not notice that inuyasha was naked in bed....and why was she naked....did i miss something!!!! any way plz update soon!!!
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Reviewed By: Miztikal_Dragon nsi On: August 26, 2004 02:08 EDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
w00t! Please keep up the great work and update asap. I can't wait to find out what happens. I was waiting forever to read the next chapter.. Please update ur other stories tooo. Krystal.
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Reviewed By: Soranji-chan [MediaMiner Member] On: August 25, 2004 17:59 EDT
Comment/Review:
I'm confused. Did that have sex? Or did they just sleep in he same bed together. I didn't think you would leav out the sex since NC-17 and you wrote about hen Kouga and Inuyasha had sex in the earlier chapters. I guess thats why I'm so confused. Well I'm still confused, the beginning of this chapter didnt' really go with the end of the last chapter. I don't know, I hope you explain this in the next chapter. I mean if they didn't have sex and just slept together naked it would make more sense if we could know the conversation that had before they go into bed. I mean it seems kind of rushed. I just hope Inuyasha picks how he wants to be with soon cause it wrong of him to string Kagome and Kouga along like this. He let Kagome kiss him and he sleeps with her but then he says he loves Kouga. I also don't understand how Kagome and Inuyasha could be so destructive to thermselves and not to the kids. People who are like that, that depressed usually take it out on those around them. It's a little hard to beleive that they won't take some of their pain out on other, they only seems to take it out on themselves and eath other.
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Title: Dude...
Reviewed By: ssp51201 [MediaMiner Member] On: August 25, 2004 15:23 EDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Kags and Inu woke up in bed, naked, and nothing happened? Uh...that's something I'd been waiting to read, but dude, I'm really confused. How can that be possible? You know, not doing anything. I'm not sure I've reviewed this story before, but if I haven't I just want to say that it is an awesome fic! I generally am not into vampirism, or yaois, but this story has a great plot, and you write the characters very well. Plus, I am loving the outcome. You have a great talent as a writer, and I'm very happy you have shared your talent. I await the next chappie with anticipation! Ja ne!
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