| "Sex Days: Shinji Ikari" Reviews/Comments [ 177 ] |
| Pages (12): [ « ‹ 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 › » ] |
Reviewed By: duggyd33 On: January 26, 2006 18:43 EST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 8 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 8 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 9 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 9 of 10
Overall Rating: 9 of 10 Comment/Review:
So far a great and entertaining lemon. Though if Shinji ends up with Rei, Asuka and Hikair, I seem to see him banging just about all the female characters in the Eva universe. But I digress, I see you'vve added a slutty Mana and Mayumi. If i was Shinji I'd get my ass to be checked for any diseases this Mana might have picked up as a call-girl. Also wouldn't he also be concerned if he might infect Rei, Asuka and Hikari with his having sex with Mana? I would suggest getting to Hikari's first time then maybe use Rei to get the three together to protect their "Man"! GREAT JOB SO FAR BUD!
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Reviewed By: someonelikeme On: January 26, 2006 17:07 EST
Comment/Review:
The story is alright, but man, stop being so full of yourself. Numbers of reviews don't mean a shit about the quality of a story (especially not if many of them are your answers to others). "Much talked about"? I haven't seen anyone but you talking about it aside from here. Most genre-fans probably won't even know you or this story. Sorry, but in a direct contest you wouldn't have a chance against that "elite". They're regarded as the best because they stand out of the masses with their work and not because of "who has the longest(/most...)?". This story however, is just one of many without overly hot original ideas and with medicore writing. I'm not trying to be overly offending. I think you actually improved already as I found the sex scenes in the early chapters rather stiff and boring, but that got noticably better lately. But do your own reputation a favor and get a reality check. Be happy that there are people who like your story and let it be with that. Otherwise you'll never be recognized as a talented lemon/fanfic author, but rather as "that annoying guy who bloated himself on each new review".
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Reviewed By: BeCool 1 On: January 26, 2006 10:48 EST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 9 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 9 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Good to see that you finally updated and Mana got her share of the pleasure, but it is sad, that Mana has to go away, because that mysterious blond chick says so. Nonetheless this is a good fanfic, but why Mana has to go? It would be great that Mana could somehow stay with Shinji and other three girls in the seventh day!
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Reviewed By: CF On: January 26, 2006 00:59 EST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 6 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 6 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 8 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 5 of 10
Overall Rating: 6 of 10 Comment/Review:
I'm glad to see another Evangelion story doing fairly well but I seriously have to point out some things about your writing. I don't intend to offend you but I will be as honest as I can seeing that we do the same thing. First of all, your grammar is kind of weak. I'm not one to speak of course but you really have errors that can be fixed with the aid of a prereader. I understand that some people don't really want help from proofreaders (myself included) and, if you are one of those people, then you might have to take some time out and try to strenghten that part of your writing. More importantly, your descriptions are okay I guess but, because of the content of the story, they don't seem that good. Why? Because it comes across as you're being artistic and practical at the same time and it clashes. I don't know how to put it but if you fixed your descriptions up a bit then the story would be a whole lot better. Can't give you much help with that though since it depends on your writing style. Overlooking that for now, your story isn't a bad idea but I wish you put more effort into the characters. I know you're working hard but the way you write the characters make them seem a bit shallow if you know what I mean but this is a moot point considering that most people don't seem to care that much about the story and being in character in lemons. Overall, I would say your story is average but only because your writing could be so much better. I apologize if I have offended you and I know that you're trying, I just feel that you can do better than this though. Once again, I'm sorry if you felt that I offended you but this is only my attempt to help out a fellow Evangelion writer. CF
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Title: Another great chapter
Reviewed By: Peacemaker(not logged in) On: January 26, 2006 00:47 EST
Rating(s):Overall Rating: 9 of 10 Comment/Review:
It is good to hear from you again and from what Iread earlier in the first chapter then Mana is going to go away sometime in this story. Keep up the good work and update when you have time please.
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Reviewed By: anonymous49 On: January 25, 2006 21:41 EST
Comment/Review:
Um... Night Shift chapter 5 had that pairing in a lemon, and Unusual Lemon had Asuka/Mana.
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Reviewed By: EVA-09 [MediaMiner Member] On: January 25, 2006 16:29 EST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 9 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 9 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Wow, this is certainly a story that I want you to finnish ASAP.
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Reviewed By: RZ On: January 23, 2006 15:15 EST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
In the name of all that is holy in all religions UPDATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Reviewed By: readerman On: January 23, 2006 08:01 EST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 9 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 9 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 9 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 9 of 10 Comment/Review:
My friends fanguy and hugefanboy weren't lyingabout this fanfic so please write more and update.
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Reviewed By: hugefanboy On: January 22, 2006 16:22 EST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 9 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 8 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 9 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 9 of 10 Comment/Review:
freaking awesome like my good friend fanguy said and i must say that you just have to update because this is absolutely great story and you have to keep on writing. I have already told my buddies to read this and all five who have read it, loved it.
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Reviewed By: fanguy On: January 21, 2006 03:13 EST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 9 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 8 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 8 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 9 of 10
Overall Rating: 9 of 10 Comment/Review:
update or you will not see your next birthday
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Reviewed By: K.F. Galindo On: January 20, 2006 19:39 EST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 9 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 9 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
This fic is good.I would like to see what happens when Mana gets a hold of Shinji.I think she should have the last laugh and also get even with Asuka since Asuka is the one that caused Shinji to lose Mana in the first place because Mana and Shinji loved each other and Asuka did not like that.Other than that keep on writing them.
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Reviewed By: AzureSky [MediaMiner Member] On: January 06, 2006 08:52 EST
Comment/Review:
Great chapter.
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Reviewed By: Zenithar On: January 04, 2006 23:48 EST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 8 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 8 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 9 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 9 of 10 Comment/Review:
Ok this is definetly a good fic it(unlike most of its like) contains a plot. I am very glad i decided to read this because when i first looked at it i was more than a little sceptical of the plot. It however is definetly well written.
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Title: Happy 2006 all
Reviewed By: Taro M.D [MediaMiner Member] On: January 01, 2006 11:44 EST
Comment/Review:
Let's make this story into the most read Eva Lemon this year!
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