| "Always A First Time" Reviews/Comments [ 259 ] |
| Pages (18): [ « ‹ 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 › » ] |
Reviewed By: dbzfanjess On: July 28, 2005 15:11 EDT
Comment/Review:
great chapter...ooh is this how wolfie will die in trying to find the androids... ^_^ can't wait for more.
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Reviewed By: rose of vegetasei On: July 28, 2005 08:58 EDT
Comment/Review:
Tsk, tsk! Bulma is a very naughty girl. To some extent I can't believe she's actually going behind her friends' backs, especially for someone who tends to give to people straight. But at the same time I don't blame her either (not that I would do something so bold). I loved the phone conversation. Reminded me of being in high school and holding double conversations when talking to people the parents don't like, ya know. I still need more thoughts from Vegeta in regards to Trunks. I'm dying to know what he thinks of Trunks, really. Or even just go sneak a peak at the sleeping infant. Saw no errors that were missed. Great chapter.
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Reviewed By: mischief maker [MediaMiner Member] On: July 27, 2005 22:07 EDT
Comment/Review:
I catch myself hoping Bulma and Wolfie go through with their assasination. XD Great work, as always. That's an interesting point you brought up about Gohan's reaction to Vegeta's plans for Goku. I don't think I've ever read another story that took that into consideration. Kudos to you!
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Reviewed By: laredith On: July 22, 2005 22:40 EDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 9 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 9 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 9 of 10
Overall Rating: 9 of 10 Comment/Review:
I love this chapter! Vegeta is so cute when he's clueless!!! Trunks is demanding, just like his daddy. I love it! More more more, I'm demanding too.... More!
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Reviewed By: Heiress2thethrone [MediaMiner Member] On: July 22, 2005 20:35 EDT
Comment/Review:
i think this is the first time i ever wanted to cry at the end of a chapter. i simply adore this story. i can't get enough! i thought the whole last interaction with bulma and vegeta was sort of sweet but im starting to worry about yamcha and how he might definately try to get back into bulma's life. but hey this is your story and ill definately continue reading it no matter what you do to it. hasta!
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Reviewed By: VegetasBabysMama [MediaMiner Member] On: July 22, 2005 18:25 EDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
I read all chapters and I want to apologize if I didn't leave a review for each one. I wanted to read all of them first to be able to feel the characters and the story. First off, I want to praise you first. You're a great writer (which I'm sure you already know); perfect punctuation, no grammatical errors (none that I can find) and necessary adverbs, nouns, adjectives are there. Besides those, I think you really bring the characters to life in your story. There are many stories out there that flow so smoothly with all the exciting twists and plots but the characters are lost in the story. And then there are those that seem like the authors thoughts are on the page, instead of the characters thoughts. I think that's where you excel. Instead of the author speaking, I felt that the characters were speaking; I felt their emotions and their personalities (I don't know if you understand what I'm saying LOL) But, ack!, I just think you're a great writer, and your story is magnificent!
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Reviewed By: The Oujis Mate [MediaMiner Member] On: July 21, 2005 22:28 EDT
Rating(s):Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
I'm sorry I haven't reviewed in such a long time (I'm sure you didn't even notice I hadn't with all the other wonderful reveiws that you get) but I just got back from a long vacation and saw how many more chapters you've added and had to catch up. You are a fantastic writer and you story is phenominal (sp). It's so true to life and to the story itself. The writing flows wonderfully and you imagery is amazing. Please update soon ( I know you will), I can't wait to see what happens next.
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Title: amazed
Reviewed By: starbrella (not signed on) On: July 20, 2005 14:26 EDT
Comment/Review:
wow, another great chapter from you!!! Thanks for not making me wait so long! i've been wondering what would happen with Vegeta finally see bulma again and finds out that the bb is his. But i guess his in denial right now ::rolls eyes:: n e ways, ur a master at this stuff. Keep it going, cuz i'll be waiting (im)patiently for the next chapter!
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Title: heylo again
Reviewed By: fujinakaheero [MediaMiner Member] On: July 19, 2005 23:18 EDT
Comment/Review:
*tears* That was sad! They finally got to see each other again and look what happens! It's just sad... and today has been an emotional day for myself, I have tears in my eyes from that v.v. Ok so I said I would review when you posted again so I'm here writing you a review right now. Anyways, good stuff, sad, but good none-the-less. Well I'll be off for now but I promise to review again when your next chapter is up. Until than Ja Ne! Fujinakaheero
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Reviewed By: nan de mo chibi otoko On: July 19, 2005 17:44 EDT
Comment/Review:
tisk tisk, vegie has no ..... no...... i dont know what he dosn't have but it's sure as hell not there.
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Reviewed By: Jess*not signed in* On: July 19, 2005 14:17 EDT
Comment/Review:
that was a good chapter. keep up the good work... your writing is amazing
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Title: This Really Moved Me.
Reviewed By: rose of vegetasei On: July 19, 2005 13:19 EDT
Comment/Review:
I have two fave lines from this chapter. First, "this is my best invention" - I had the same feeling when I had my ultrasound yesterday and using the word invention fits Bulma's personality perfectly. Then the last line. That almost had me cracking up (though it was a sad scene) just cause I could see Bulma saying that. God, I really need to know the thoughts in Vegeta's mind though. Does he really not care about the baby? Does he really look down on Trunks cause he's not as Saiyan as Vegeta would desire? The next chapter by any chance explore Vegeta's thoughts on Trunks, would it? (whistles innocently)
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Reviewed By: mischief maker [MediaMiner Member] On: July 19, 2005 13:18 EDT
Comment/Review:
I know you think he's ugly, but he looks just like you…you jerk. That line killed me! ^__^ Great chapter. Vegeta's reaction to the baby being so human-like is very realistic.
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Reviewed By: catgirl26 (not signed in!) On: July 15, 2005 19:33 EDT
Comment/Review:
Wonderful chapter, Deb! Vegeta's curiosity and apprehension toward the baby is very well written, a refresher from all the "I will have nothing to do with this child!" outbursts we're all used to. I'm really looking forward to seeing how he reacts to Trunks up close, and what happens between he and Bulma now that they're parents.
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Reviewed By: Ember [MediaMiner Member] On: July 15, 2005 06:01 EDT
Comment/Review:
Aw... there was something so satisfyingly Vegeta about his reaction, thought process, and actions in this chapter. It could almost be called sweet, and to pull that emotion from Vegeta without OOC-ness is as brilliant from the authoress as the result is beautiful for the reader. I'm really looking forward to the next chapter, Debbie. *hugs*
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| Pages (18): [ « ‹ 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 › » ] |
